Are homeshoolers better?

[Learner]

I think YES!

I dont homeshool, but after being on these forums for a while, I feel, Moms are doing a great job at home, They being so concerned what their child is learning, what's his abilities/weaknesses are..What curriculum is working , what not..

 

My DS (7) goes to PS (Doing good according to review by teachers and results in tests), in a top rating school, but still I feel, in comparison to the homeschoolers learning from SOTW (History), FLL/MCT (Grammar), Singapore(MATH)...my kids are way behind in History, they know nothing uptil now, except a few leaders of USA, few facts about US..I bought a book of SOTW and its activity guide , to actually see whats in it.. I was amazed with the details/lesson approach..

 

Is it just me..as I am beginning to feel guilty, that I am sending my kids to PS in the hopes that they will get better education there, but when I compare them with teh grade plans for his grade level..I feel he is falling behind..) He is doing good in PS otherwise)

 

Please advice:001_huh:

[WishboneDawn]

Don't worry about it. Some of us may be better in some arenas then some schooling moms but frankly I've known too many absolutely awesome moms who don't homeschool to buy into the idea that homeschooling moms are better.

[twoforjoy]

Don't worry about it. Some of us may be better in some arenas then some schooling moms but frankly I've known too many absolutely awesome moms who don't homeschool to buy into the idea that homeschooling moms are better.

 

This.

 

And, I wouldn't worry too much about what your kids learn about history right now. Honestly, I expect my son to forget most of what we cover in elementary history and science. I know that I learned about history and science at that age, but I don't recall any specifics. But I ended up getting a great history education in high school and college, and the background must have been there, because I was able to make sense of what I was learning.

 

I think it's also important to remember that homeschooling on paper--like any curriculum on paper--probably looks a lot more impressive than it actually is in practice. At the very least, I know that's the case at my house. And if it's any consolation, I wonder all the time if my son would be getting a better education in a traditional classroom, and see the things some of his friends are doing in school, and wonder if he's behind.

 

It's just the nature of parenting to question yourself, I think, and to often (if not always) feel like you're falling short.

[TracyR]

Do I think its better? No. I've never thought that. I think it just all boils down to what you want and can do for your family.

 

If you work full time and don't have the energy to homeschool and feel ps is better then that's what's better for your family.

If you are a stay at home mom and send your child to school because that's where you think they need to be . then that's better.

 

But if you have the will , the want , and the energy to homeschool then by all means just do it!

 

Otherwise you can do extra at home. Afterschooling and honestly to me its all the same.

I homeschooled for 8yrs and my girls wanted to give school a try so I let them. Personally to me I'm paying for school so my kids can come home to learn from me. Hmph. But that's the way I feel about it. Someone else may not. I still have kept all my homeschooling materials and do extra where they want more and a challenge and work on remedial things when things get tough.

 

I know that homeschooling isn't really better. I can tell you there were things I wished I worked on more here at home. But it didn't help much when my girls would argue and fight me when I wanted them to do something either. So there are some subjects they are weak on due to that or me just not having the time to split myself into 4 seperate beings when I wished I could have.

 

Homeschooling is an option, in some cases it can be better if you live in a horrible school district ( like we do). But other then that its not better.

[Tarreymere]

As a parent you are interested in your child and want to make good choices for that child. Sometimes those choices are homeschool and sometimes those choices are public school, private school, cyber school, whatever. The most important thing is that you as the parent are involved and interested in what your child is doing and that your child knows that.

 

If you like the school that your child attends for the most part but you feel that you would like to maybe add in a few things you certainly can do that, it is called 'afterschooling'. If you like SOTW you can always add that in at home.

[Word Nerd]

Better parents? Better people? I'm still the same person as an afterschooling, involved PS parent that I was as a full-time homeschooler.

[regentrude]

No, homeschoolers are not "better".

My kids attended public school for several years. Now that this does not work anymore, they are homeschooled. We are still the same parents ;-)

 

I do see that homeschooling parents are generally very interested in their kids, maybe more than some ps parents (after all, if people don't care about their kids, they usually don't go to the trouble to school them at home). But I also know plenty of ps parents who have their childrens interests at heart and who make sure their kids get a great education.

And then, I see homeschoolers whose kids get an education that is much below what the ps could have offered...

 

Making different educational choices alone has nothing to do with being "better" or "worse" parents.

[Storm Bay]

Don't worry about it. Some of us may be better in some arenas then some schooling moms but frankly I've known too many absolutely awesome moms who don't homeschool to buy into the idea that homeschooling moms are better.

Right. And there are a few homeschooling parents who don't do such a great job with their dc; people are people.

 

In our house, the best decision I made with education last year was to send my eldest back to ps in Nov (she's a sophomore and had been out since the end of grade 2.) Not only is she getting more work done, but it has reduced stress for our entire family. While I personally don't like public schoo (I hated ps for many reasons growing up, so it's partly personal), it doesn't mean that it's always wrong to send your dc to ps. Now my dream was that she would homeschool through high school, but it was not working for her or for any of us. I was so stressed out (not just because of dd, of course, but I'm at the perimenopause/menopause age and have a lot of other things going on) that I had gotten into a real slump with homeschooling. I've been able to do better with my other two, but am letting my 13 yo try ps for the first time in Sept because I'm still not where I need to be and she really, really wants to go and has met my criteria for being allowed to go (but has to keep it once she's there.) I'll have one at home then, and he should benefit from having me one on one for school, etc.

Edited May 14, 2011 by Karin

[Crimson Wife]

There are good and bad homeschools just like there are good & bad private schools and good & bad government-run schools. This forum tends to attract the more academically-oriented subset of homeschoolers. I know a bunch of "unschoolers" and Waldorf HS families IRL who do not place a high priority on academics and in fact sometimes seem almost anti-intellectual. IMHO their children would probably be better off from an academic standpoint attending a traditional school (socially & emotionally it's a tougher call however).

 

Only you can judge for yourself what is the best educational option for your own children.

[happycc]

This is my own personal experience with my kids and observation:

 

When my kids started going to public school after homeschooling they said they were getting dumber. They were about 1-2 yrs ahead in school when they started and had an absolute love for learning.

Now after several years of being in school now, they are not working up to their potential. Getting d's and f;s and say school is boring and the only thing they like about it is the social stuff and for my son PE.

Now my kids have been angry at me because they say I didn;t teach them the important things when they were homeschooled. They are mad that I didn;t teach them the bad words and what they meant and all of the sexual innuendos and all the words for homosexual. They were stupid and made fun of because of not knowing these things. I apologized and said well they weren't in the standard curriculum for k, 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5 grade.

However, I have noted as well as been told that when my kids first attended school they were very well behaved, respectful, seemed to have a lot of practical life skills, have good common sense, smart, talented, polite compared to their classmates. I don;t hear this anymore. It is now about not paying attention in class, talking in class, not working up to their potential, not being respectful, argumentative, more focused on the drama etc

 

My kids never cared what they wore when they were homeschooled. Now they have to wear namebrand stuff. They girls spend hours grooming themselves and applying make up. THere is just so much peer pressure. When they homeschooled they rarely fought. Now they fight amongst each other all the time. When they homeschooled they played with all ages of kids and spoke to adults confidently. Now they only speak to kids their own ages making fun of older and younger kids and do not have much respect for adults. They want to watch R rated movies and they do unfortunately at friends houses. You try to find out about other parents but you really don;t know them until it is often too late. They come off as being strict or careful but often times they are really hands off with their kids. Or they over spoil their kids and give them whatever they want. I don;t see this much with homeschooled kids. My kids are not helpful with chores like other homeschooled teens i have seen and met. Let's see: at this point, one preteen got into cutting when a friend got into it she was also caught shoplifting because she heard others got away with it, she is also the same one who stays home from school at least once a month to get away from all the social drama because she is popular and is currently being used by other kids as a stepping stone, another teen has been depressed because he feels rejected by the nonChristians at the school and excluded and tried to hang himself at his dads house, another preteen was threatened recently and was told that this boy was going to kill her, shoot and send her to hell because she didn;t say thank you when he opened the door for her and he had a homemade air soft gun rigged at home. The scary thing is that the schools these kids go to are really good schools in good neighborhoods. The blue ribbon schools.

 

Now I will say there are some good things about peer pressure from being at school....

One child never spoke much to anyone when she was homeschooled.She was shy. Now she talks all the time.

One child cried a lot when we were homeschooling, now he doesnt cry much because he was called a crybaby.

One child refused to read and would cry when I worked with her but since she started school and saw all the other kids sit down and work she has now learned to read, write and do math.

Two of my kids were not very active physically, they are now more physically active.

My kids say their birthdays are more fun now.

 

 

I am sure I can think of more things but here are some pros and cons to start.

[laundrycrisis]

I would not say that what I am doing is better than what someone else has chosen. What they have chosen may be the best for their family and kids. I do believe that what I am doing now (homeschooling) is the best choice for our family and kids now. Things can change and then something else is the best choice. I do feel that right now homeschooling is a better choice than public school for our kids. But I won't compare what I'm doing to what another family has chosen. I have my reasons and they have theirs.

[TracyR]

This is my own personal experience with my kids and observation:

 

When my kids started going to public school after homeschooling they said they were getting dumber. They were about 1-2 yrs ahead in school when they started and had an absolute love for learning.

Now after several years of being in school now, they are not working up to their potential. Getting d's and f;s and say school is boring and the only thing they like about it is the social stuff and for my son PE.

Now my kids have been angry at me because they say I didn;t teach them the important things when they were homeschooled. They are mad that I didn;t teach them the bad words and what they meant and all of the sexual innuendos and all the words for homosexual. They were stupid and made fun of because of not knowing these things. I apologized and said well they weren't in the standard curriculum for k, 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5 grade.

However, I have noted as well as been told that when my kids first attended school they were very well behaved, respectful, seemed to have a lot of practical life skills, have good common sense, smart, talented, polite compared to their classmates. I don;t hear this anymore. It is now about not paying attention in class, talking in class, not working up to their potential, not being respectful, argumentative, more focused on the drama etc

 

My kids never cared what they wore when they were homeschooled. Now they have to wear namebrand stuff. They girls spend hours grooming themselves and applying make up. THere is just so much peer pressure. When they homeschooled they rarely fought. Now they fight amongst each other all the time. When they homeschooled they played with all ages of kids and spoke to adults confidently. Now they only speak to kids their own ages making fun of older and younger kids and do not have much respect for adults. They want to watch R rated movies and they do unfortunately at friends houses. You try to find out about other parents but you really don;t know them until it is often too late. They come off as being strict or careful but often times they are really hands off with their kids. Or they over spoil their kids and give them whatever they want. I don;t see this much with homeschooled kids. My kids are not helpful with chores like other homeschooled teens i have seen and met. Let's see: at this point, one preteen got into cutting when a friend got into it she was also caught shoplifting because she heard others got away with it, she is also the same one who stays home from school at least once a month to get away from all the social drama because she is popular and is currently being used by other kids as a stepping stone, another teen has been depressed because he feels rejected by the nonChristians at the school and excluded and tried to hang himself at his dads house, another preteen was threatened recently and was told that this boy was going to kill her, shoot and send her to hell because she didn;t say thank you when he opened the door for her and he had a homemade air soft gun rigged at home. The scary thing is that the schools these kids go to are really good schools in good neighborhoods. The blue ribbon schools.

 

Now I will say there are some good things about peer pressure from being at school....

One child never spoke much to anyone when she was homeschooled.She was shy. Now she talks all the time.

One child cried a lot when we were homeschooling, now he doesnt cry much because he was called a crybaby.

One child refused to read and would cry when I worked with her but since she started school and saw all the other kids sit down and work she has now learned to read, write and do math.

Two of my kids were not very active physically, they are now more physically active.

My kids say their birthdays are more fun now.

 

 

I am sure I can think of more things but here are some pros and cons to start.

 

You know what I find all those points so very true. My girls were about a year ahead , and this year they have barely progressed. My 11yr old was tested recently and only tested in reading at a late 4th grade level. She was reading the same books as her big sister when she was at home. Even my 7yr old did not progress in reading. She tested a late 1st grade. She was reading a year ahead of herself when she was at home. She didn't progress at all. She was sent home with readers that my 4yr old could read. I asked for her to be pushed up and her teacher felt she was comfortable where my daughter was at. WE've had way more drama this year then I'd like. More so since I'm a mother to 4 girls and we have enough of our own 'drama'.

 

I'll admit I didn't keep up to much with their reading because I had to try and help them with math and there are four of them and one of me. I was none to happy to find out they hadn't progressed at all. So now I've brought out my trusty homeschooling books to try and catch them up to where they should be.

 

My 13 yr old said that everything was review for her this year. And her attitude has just taken a 360 this year and she wants to go to the high school. Which I really do not want her there. I have great reserve about it and don't feel comfortable. Have my in laws that have this grandeur vision of the high school and think its wonderful ( um , not in a million years). I know what will happen.

 

My girls used to be very well mannered, loved learning and and enjoyed school in general. Now I have to remind them to use their manners, be respectful and they just can't wait until school is done and overwith. Personally I can't wait for school to be done with.

Thankfully they aren't mad at me for not teaching them about bad words, or anything sexual or anything like that. Since they go to a private school where the kids there are still , just kids.

But ps is a whole other ball game that I just don't want to deal with.

 

I am all for everyone out there who makes their own decisions. You have to make the one that is right for you. For us, really , in my family , homeschool is better. But right now only two of my four really want to be home.

[AnnaM]

Havent read the rest of the replies but I want to say that homeschoolers are not better! We still make mistakes and we dont care about our children any more or less than you do :) I definitely think that homeschooling is generally superior, but the people who do it, nope, we are not any better than you!

 

What I would say though, is if you are starting to feel guilty it may be time to weigh your options and see if you need to make the change. At the end of the day, the fact that you even care one way or the other makes you a GREAT parent!

[BabyBre]

Don't worry about it. Some of us may be better in some arenas then some schooling moms but frankly I've known too many absolutely awesome moms who don't homeschool to buy into the idea that homeschooling moms are better.

 

 

I don't think the question was about whether homeschooling MOMS are better than public school moms. The question was about whether homeschooling provides a better education than public school.

 

Just like the answer to the good mom question will vary from mother to mother depending on how she mothers, the answer to the homeschooling vs. public schooling question will depend on how a child is homeschooled and the quality of the public school. There's no blanket answer as far as I know unless some standardized test results are out there comparing those exclusively homeschooled with those exclusively public schooled. There are just too many factors that would come into play (part-time attendance, leaving/entering the ps system part way through, etc.), so I doubt that a very accurate reporting of stats is even out there.

 

On the whole, though, it's hard to argue with the problems our public schools are facing right now (talked to many high school grads lately?), or with the notion that a smaller student-teacher ratio with the ability to customize methodology and curricula is beneficial to student learning. But the fact remains that homeschooling is what you make it for your child. Public schooling is what a beauracracy makes it for your child. Both can and do turn out the full spectrum of educational results.

[Lovedtodeath]

I think YES!

I dont homeshool, but after being on these forums for a while, I feel, Moms are doing a great job at home, They being so concerned what their child is learning, what's his abilities/weaknesses are..What curriculum is working , what not..

 

My DS (7) goes to PS (Doing good according to review by teachers and results in tests), in a top rating school, but still I feel, in comparison to the homeschoolers learning from SOTW (History), FLL/MCT (Grammar), Singapore(MATH)...my kids are way behind in History, they know nothing uptil now, except a few leaders of USA, few facts about US..I bought a book of SOTW and its activity guide , to actually see whats in it.. I was amazed with the details/lesson approach..

 

Is it just me..as I am beginning to feel guilty, that I am sending my kids to PS in the hopes that they will get better education there, but when I compare them with teh grade plans for his grade level..I feel he is falling behind..) He is doing good in PS otherwise)

 

Please advice:001_huh:

Haven't you read the threads by homeschooling moms like me who have never finished any history or science curricula that they have purchased?

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

The question was about whether homeschooling provides a better education than public school.

 

I would say homeschooling has a better potential for a great education than public school, yes. The fact that the child can get an education perfectly tailored to his or her needs is the major plus. But implementation will vary wildly.

 

And even if I like what I'm doing with my kids (as in I'm satisfied at the level they're working at) I keep telling them they are not learning the same things as in school, and there will be some things the schooled kids will have learned than my kids won't.

[Geo]

This is my own personal experience with my kids and observation:

 

When my kids started going to public school after homeschooling they said they were getting dumber. They were about 1-2 yrs ahead in school when they started and had an absolute love for learning.

Now after several years of being in school now, they are not working up to their potential. Getting d's and f;s and say school is boring and the only thing they like about it is the social stuff and for my son PE.

Now my kids have been angry at me because they say I didn;t teach them the important things when they were homeschooled. They are mad that I didn;t teach them the bad words and what they meant and all of the sexual innuendos and all the words for homosexual. They were stupid and made fun of because of not knowing these things. I apologized and said well they weren't in the standard curriculum for k, 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5 grade.

However, I have noted as well as been told that when my kids first attended school they were very well behaved, respectful, seemed to have a lot of practical life skills, have good common sense, smart, talented, polite compared to their classmates. I don;t hear this anymore. It is now about not paying attention in class, talking in class, not working up to their potential, not being respectful, argumentative, more focused on the drama etc

 

My kids never cared what they wore when they were homeschooled. Now they have to wear namebrand stuff. They girls spend hours grooming themselves and applying make up. THere is just so much peer pressure. When they homeschooled they rarely fought. Now they fight amongst each other all the time. When they homeschooled they played with all ages of kids and spoke to adults confidently. Now they only speak to kids their own ages making fun of older and younger kids and do not have much respect for adults. They want to watch R rated movies and they do unfortunately at friends houses. You try to find out about other parents but you really don;t know them until it is often too late. They come off as being strict or careful but often times they are really hands off with their kids. Or they over spoil their kids and give them whatever they want. I don;t see this much with homeschooled kids. My kids are not helpful with chores like other homeschooled teens i have seen and met. Let's see: at this point, one preteen got into cutting when a friend got into it she was also caught shoplifting because she heard others got away with it, she is also the same one who stays home from school at least once a month to get away from all the social drama because she is popular and is currently being used by other kids as a stepping stone, another teen has been depressed because he feels rejected by the nonChristians at the school and excluded and tried to hang himself at his dads house, another preteen was threatened recently and was told that this boy was going to kill her, shoot and send her to hell because she didn;t say thank you when he opened the door for her and he had a homemade air soft gun rigged at home. The scary thing is that the schools these kids go to are really good schools in good neighborhoods. The blue ribbon schools.

 

Now I will say there are some good things about peer pressure from being at school....

One child never spoke much to anyone when she was homeschooled.She was shy. Now she talks all the time.

One child cried a lot when we were homeschooling, now he doesnt cry much because he was called a crybaby.

One child refused to read and would cry when I worked with her but since she started school and saw all the other kids sit down and work she has now learned to read, write and do math.

Two of my kids were not very active physically, they are now more physically active.

My kids say their birthdays are more fun now.

 

 

I am sure I can think of more things but here are some pros and cons to start.

 

Wow, sounds like a bad trade :001_unsure:. Just sayin'...

 

Geo

Edited May 17, 2011 by Geo

[Word Nerd]

The title did say, "Are homeschoolers better?"--not whether homeschooling is better. Many of the responses have simply addressed the question as written.

[regentrude]

I don't think the question was about whether homeschooling MOMS are better than public school moms. The question was about whether homeschooling provides a better education than public school.

 

 

No, the title clearly said "Are homeschoolERS better?"

As in: better parents, better people.

[silliness7]

No, the title clearly said "Are homeschoolERS better?"

As in: better parents, better people.

 

....or better educated? I took it the way Breanne did. But I like what Cleo said. The potential is great but implementation will vary wildly. It varies wildly in our home school depending on the year, month, day, hour. :glare:

[GypsieFamily]

I think it's what works best for the individual family and child(ren) in question. We are homeschoolers, but my kids are spending this term at a tiny one-roomed school because I think that's a better option for them. They are enthusiastic and enjoying it, and it gives me a chance to get some of my own work done. Not better or worse, just different. Here it is different because there are different adults teaching them (school has a ratio of 1 adult to 5 kids, so about the same as at home) and they have the other kids around.

[Storm Bay]

question will vary from mother to mother depending on how she mothers, the answer to the homeschooling vs. public schooling question will depend on how a child is homeschooled and the quality of the public school. .

 

It also depends on a few other things, too, such as the cooperation of the student, particularly in the teen years. Not all teens will tow the line when you put your foot down regardless of how amazingly well you may or may not parent them.

 

No, the title clearly said "Are homeschoolERS better?"

As in: better parents, better people.

Correct.

[Erika]

I don't think homeschoolers are better. But many do provide there children with a strong education. And I am a true believer, that I am the best educator for my ds, but I don't believe I should be the only one. Therefore, I send him to private school (1st grade 2011-12 school year) and afterschool him at home.

 

So if you like SOTW, why not do it at home? You could easily listen to the audios on any 15 min trip you take in the car or before bedtime. I am truely amazed what I can do at home in an hour (phonics, math, FLL, WWE, and read-alouds at bedtime) with my wiggle worm!

[mellie]

There's no way to say one is better than the other. Some public schools are phenomenal, and would be hard to beat, others are terrible, and would be hard to be worse than. Same goes with homeschooling. Some parents are amazing, and it works fantastically, others are terrible. I know personally of one family who "homeschooled" their son on and off after pulling him out of various schools - P.S, Waldorf, Charter, Montessori. They were never happy with the schools, however kept him home and had him complete 2 pages of a workbook each day (that was it!.) I saw something he had written at age 11, and was appalled. At 18, he could barely read/write. So, no, not all homeschools are better! It depends on the parents.

[kchara]

Are homeschoolers innately better people and parents? No. I've met some really... off... homeschoolers, and I'm sure there are people who think that about me. We're human, after all.

 

But, if I didn't think homeschooling was absolutely, without a doubt the best educational option available, frankly, I wouldn't do it. It's a heck of a lot of work, and it's a thankless job. But, yes, I believe homeschooling does provide a superior education (or at least has the potential to).