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Do you buy presents for adult, married nieces and nephews?


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Hi ,

 

We have quite a few nieces in college and graduated from college. What I do is give money to "my" nieces/nephews (my brothers kids), and gift cards to Barnes & Noble to our nieces that are my hubands sisters' kids. We have ceased giving gifts to the parents of said nieces & nephews it's just tooooo much $$$..... Also, we give everyone the exact same amt :), so it's all transparent and fair.

 

The kids, esp in college can use any money that comes their way...HTH

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We send cards to them separate from their parents, but haven't been able to buy gifts since they grew out of $1 toys and coloring books. We send a box to dh's neice's daughter, but it is usually something that the kids have outgrown that is still in good shape or occasionally a really pretty outfit that we couldn't resist since our only girl is 11 and refuses to allow our opinions on clothes other than inappropriate.

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We're not there yet... I just don't see how I *could* buy something for all of my nieces and nephews for birthdays/Christmas. My parents have a total of 8 nieces/nephews. I have twenty-one... and still counting. Plus, I have five children... who all claim to want at least 20! :lol:

 

Maybe, I will send homemade baked goods/candies, but even that is a stretch... unless I have DIL and grown DD in town who would do things "with" me. I almost never received gifts from my aunts/uncles... but I know that was as much as because my birthday was often "forgotten."

 

I just want to get back to sending cards!

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I was just wondering about the same thing. My oldest nephew is 25 and married. My oldest niece (different parents) is 19. I did give my nephew and his wife a gift card for Target, and my niece a DVD. I'm wondering, though. I mean, once someone's an adult, out of the house, and married, it seems odd for me to be giving them a gift every year if they don't reciprocate, kwim? And I can't afford to do it forever. So I'm thinking next year it'll be just a card for my nephew and his wife. I guess I'll continue to give gifts to my niece as long as she's still living at home and single.

 

Wendi

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We've always bought presents for our nieces and nephews for Christmas, even while they were still in college. One of them is now an adult and married. Now I'm wondering what to do. What do you think- gift or no gift? What does your family do?

 

No, we don't. In fact, no one in my extended family does this. We used to years ago. But, we just buy for the kids now. It's fine with all of us.

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Gifts stop when they stop going to school (high school, tech. school or college). When they have children, the children get gifts. We have three nieces and four nephews. We have 8 great nieces and 5 great nephews. I had a ball shopping for the little ones this year!

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Thanks for all the responses! Over the past couple of years the gift giving on DH's side of the family has finally gotten under control. :hurray:(One year we actually had to buy a present for DH's second cousin's live in girlfriend. :glare:) It's been nice just getting together with the family without the giant mounds of presents. Talked with DH and we're going to just draw the line at married and call it good- although he's a wonderful nephew and we just love his new wife. But husband says we have to draw the line somewhere, and he doesn't want him to feel obligated to buy us or our kids gifts, especially if they have kids in the future too.

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We've always bought presents for our nieces and nephews for Christmas, even while they were still in college. One of them is now an adult and married. Now I'm wondering what to do. What do you think- gift or no gift? What does your family do?

 

 

Our situation is complicated...

but generally age 18 would be the cutoff age for nieces/nephews getting gifts from us. We have 20+ nieces/nephews!!!!!!!

 

My side of family (13 nieces/nephews- ages range from age 5 to 30yr):

Only my 21 yr old nephew, 24 yr old niece, and 30 yr old nephew (who we raised since they were 8, 11, and 17) get gifts from us. Once they turned 18, we spend about $25 for each (unless we can afford more). But the four younger kids give them a little something too. Dh's parents and my parents also send a little something for them. Dh's family basicaly adopted my niece and nephews as one of theirs and sends my niece/nephews gifts/money for bdays and holidays.

 

My brothers and step siblings never gave gifts to our kids. So when our twins turned 3 yrs old, Dh and I stopped giving to my brothers and step siblings children (also at that time we went from just having twin 3yrs olds to also having a 9yr old, 11 yr old and a 17 yr old and we were pregnant).

 

 

Dh's side of family (7 nieces/nephews- ages range from 3 days to 21yr, and another on the way):

we always try to give a little something to their kids until they are 18.

 

Dh's older sister always gave to our kids (and to my niece/nephews) as their Ds is older than our four kids. They now have a 7yr old also.

 

Dh's oldest brother always spoiled our kids for Christmas... until his Dd#1 was born 5yrs ago. They also have a 3 yr old Dd.

 

Dh's younger two brothers... one has two boys ages 3 and 4 and another on the way, the youngest brother's son is 3 days old.

 

But this year, Dh's siblings asked to not exchange gifts. Dh and I are not comfortable since we haven't been able to recipricate for the youngest nieces/nephews as much as his siblings gave to our kids. So we plan to make it up to them the next time we visit-LOL. This year everyone is feeling the $$ pinch.

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