Why are cops so rude?

[tikitorch]

I'd probably be rude too if I had to deal with everything they put up with

[fivetails]

I didn't realize cop was derogatory. I meant no offense.

 

I've never known it to be "derogatory" slang either ~ maybe it depends where you live? There are certainly some terms used for [police] that ARE very disrespectful and nasty - but I've never known "cops" to be one of them.

[Harriet Vane]

I've never known it to be "derogatory" slang either ~ maybe it depends where you live? There are certainly some terms used for [police] that ARE very disrespectful and nasty - but I've never known "cops" to be one of them.

 

:iagree: My friend refers to himself as a cop, says things like, "Yeah, I always wanted to be a cop."

[mysticamethyst]

I'm sorry that the officer treated you badly. This has been my experience more than once. I'm sure there are just as many good officers as bad but like with any group it only takes one to ruin the reputation of all that share the uniform. My children are terrified of police because one came up to the van with gun pulled because I was going 6 miles over the speed limit. Any officer approach that would approach van or car with young children visible from road with gun pulled is in my opinion off his rocker. They do have a most dangerous job but that in no way gives them the right to treat people like some of them do.

[Parrothead]

I think if an honest person gets a job as a police officer, he'll be honest. If he's a jerk before, he'll be a jerk police-officer. We have a friend who used to be a Harris county(Houston) sheriff. He told us that many carried straight pins in their sleeve just for sick kicks. If they were arresting someone they really were annoyed at, they'd poke them with the pin. The person's instinct is to throw out the arm, which looks like they're trying to evade arrest or even attack the officer. Of course, now they're free to really go after him. You don't want to hear about their rented apartments used for women.

See, this kind of thing is unbelievable. This guy that told you, why hasn't he told the city council? the media? the state attorney general?

 

Bad officers and departments are only allowed to flourish if the people don't do anything. When I was on the job if something like this had been found out the chief would have gone ballistic. I can think of many chiefs/directors that would have fired people on the spot.

 

This thread is just a bash session with people talking about how horrible police officers are and what bullies they are. I know hundreds of men and women that are law enforcement officers. Several different departments, several different agencies from the local to the federal level. None of them are bullies. These are men and women that are decent human beings doing a thankless job for little compensation.

 

If you have come up against a bad officer, (yes, I know there are some) do something about it instead of whining on message boards about it. Call the supervisor, write letters to the city council, contact the state authorities, do something proactive.

[Perry]

One of my BIL's died after a straight-forward, but totally botched surgery in a major teacing hospital. He was 58. It was one of the the saddest things that had happened to our family. He was an absolutely loving and amazing person.

:grouphug: I'm sorry; that's awful.

 

 

What happens when a cop is not hpervigilent and something bad happens? That cop is going to be in big $hit. With his officers, with his community. I don't wonder why cops err on the side of hypervigilence. I am aware that some cops can be horrible!, but I would also not like to be one. Any minor mistake in judgement; any time you err on the side of caution and bad things happen, your neck is on the block. Same with social workers. "Everything looked fine. The children seemed happy, if the home a bit chaotic. We had no reason to believe she would smother the child to death once we left."

 

But I think there is a difference between errors in judgment and out of control behavior. We're all human. I'm entirely tolerant of people that are trying to do a good job and make mistakes. I'm sympathetic to people who work with the segment of population that makes life difficult for the rest of us. It's hard, frustrating, thankless and dangerous work. But someone who carries a lethal weapon *has* to be able to control their anger and frustration. I have no sympathy for an incompetent or impaired surgeon. I have no tolerance for an officer that screams at an ordinary person sitting in traffic. There is just too much potential for tragic consequences. They need to find a different job if they can't maintain control.

[Perry]

If you have come up against a bad officer, (yes, I know there are some) do something about it instead of whining on message boards about it. Call the supervisor, write letters to the city council, contact the state authorities, do something proactive.

 

I wanted to ask for his badge number but was afraid I'd get my head blown off.

[Parrothead]

I wanted to ask for his badge number but was afraid I'd get my head blown off.

There are records of every stop. The radio traffic is recorded. Chances are every word said to you and every thing you said was recorded (many but not all departments have this technology.)

 

Call the department. Give them the time and where you were. Give them your vehicle license plate number. They will know exactly who the officer was. They will know the time he called out and the time he called back in.

 

Ask if the department has recording technology. If so, ask for a review of the recording.

 

Don't want to make a phone call, write a letter. Contact the media. They would jump on that in a heartbeat.

 

Seriously, if you were that afraid, do you want someone else to be that afraid? Do what you can to get that guy out of a position of authority and off the street.

Edited June 8, 2010 by Parrothead

[Perry]

There are records of every stop. The radio traffic is recorded. Chances are every word said to you and every thing you said was recorded (many but not all departments have this technology.)

 

Call the department. Give them the time and where you were. Give them your vehicle license plate number. They will know exactly who the officer was. They will know the time he called out and the time he called back in.

 

Ask if the department has recording technology. If so, ask for a review of the recording.

 

Don't want to make a phone call, write a letter. Contact the media. They would jump on that in a heartbeat.

 

Seriously, if you were that afraid, do you want someone else to be that afraid? Do what you can to get that guy out of a position of authority and off the street.

It wasn't a stop, he was (sort of) directing traffic at a blocked off intersection, and basically walking up to people who were trying to get their cars turned around, yelling at them for coming down that road. There were no signs warning that the road was closed, and you couldn't tell until you turned onto it and then had nowhere to go.

 

Anyway, there wouldn't have been a record of any interaction unless he was wearing a microphone. I'm sure the department could have figured out who it was, but it would have been a case of my word against his, and I really didn't think it would have made one bit of difference.

 

In retrospect, I wish I would have reported him. If it ever happens again, I will.

[LibraryLover]

I didn't realize cop was derogatory. I meant no offense.

 

 

They call themselves cops...at least the cops I know. of course, if you are pulled over, "You say "Yes, officer. Is there a problem". :001_smile:

[Parrothead]

 

In retrospect, I wish I would have reported him. If it ever happens again, I will.

Good!

 

I know that for the hundred of professional officers/deputies/agents I know personally, there are crappy unprofessional officers/deputies/agents that have no business in that profession. But they will stay in those positions until the supervisors get word of their antics. If everyone that encounters these guys would make a bit of noise something would be done.

 

I know of a small town in Georgia that had a bad ineffective department. Eventually, the citizenry got tired of this bunch and the city council had the city manager fire the lot of them from chief to rookie. They've had a great chief and officers for about 8 years now, but the new guys still have to live down some incidents their predecessors had a hand in.

[Parrothead]

They call themselves cops...at least the cops I know. of course, if you are pulled over, "You say "Yes, officer. Is there a problem". :001_smile:

:lol:

 

Yes, it really used to be an insult. When my dad was first started "cop" was as bad as "pig." Over the last 30 years it has lost its derogatory meaning especially with the advent of the show C.O.P.S.

[justamouse]

If you were to look it up and research it, you would find that it has something to do with the personality type that tends to be drawn to the job. That is according to some reports that I read about 8 years ago after a rather upsetting pull over I had. I think it also has to do with power corrupting people.

 

The judge informed me that he had these guys over for bbq's all the time in his backyard. No finer men in the world. I had nothing to fear from them. (Well, I don't know them!) The judge only backed down when he came to the realization (possibly from my expression of disbelief and outrage on my face) that I would probably take it to the media if he didn't drop it, which I would have done. One of those outstanding young men that he has over to his backyard bbq's was arrested within the month and subsequently convicted for raping a woman he pulled over. I really hope that judge realized that he does NOT know these men and that it is protecting not only the driver of the car but the reputation of the officers (in case of a loony calling assault when it didn't happen) for the person driving to proceed cautiously to a lit populated area.

 

yes, there is a certain personality that is drawn, and, frankly, I think it's the minority that are good decent men.

 

one of my best friends was pulled over on a rural road at night, told to get out of the car, put her hands on the hood and he then proceeded to grope her and tell her how she couldn't tell because no one would believe her.

 

Another friend's EX husband was a cop and did pretty much the same thing, except he pressured the women into having affairs. She had a breakdown like nothing I've seen.

Edited June 8, 2010 by justamouse

[Pink Fairy]

And yet I have read on these very boards where people have used the excuse "having a bad day" to justify a mother being verbally abusive to her children. Interesting.

 

(OT, and not implying you feel that way, Mamabegood.)

 

Yes, I've read the same thing and probably feel the same way you do about it. Having a bad day isn't a valid excuse for abuse of any kind. (Although I do think people for whom this is out of character will recognize that they were at fault and make amends as much as possible).

[Nestof3]

Wow! I guess I'm glad my son fits into the minority. He desires to protect and defend women, not rape and assault them.

 

I also heard my neighbor (who is an officer) telling my son that it is such a wonderful job. He enjoys being able to help people. He was telling my son that the best officers are those who desire to serve others. Right now, he is near retirement and is helping with those who have alert systems (handicapped and elderly) and parking, but there was a time he was in the action. Sounds like a real jerk, huh?

 

PS -- He calls them cops too.

 

yes, there is a certain personality that is drawn, and, frankly, I think it's the minority that are good decent men.

 

 

Edited June 8, 2010 by nestof3

[elizabeth]

:lol:

 

Yes, it really used to be an insult. When my dad was first started "cop" was as bad as "pig." Over the last 30 years it has lost its derogatory meaning especially with the advent of the show C.O.P.S.

 

http://www.copinthehood.com/2008/05/is-cop-bad-word.html Interesting take on this issue of proper address.

[Haiku]

My mom got pulled over for speeding when I was four. I was in the backseat crying and said, "Mommy, will you have to go to jail?" The cop leaned his head in the window and snapped, "No, she'll just have to pay a lot of money and hope she never gets in an accident where she hurts someone!"

 

I was four and I still remember it plain as day.

 

Tara

[jewellsmommy]

(none of this is said in defense of a rude officer, just a perspective)

 

My father was an officer for well over 20 yrs (retired) in our city. He still does a law enforcement job but for Dept. of motor vehicles. Being a l.e.o. in our area is definitely not easy. We have what we call the "east end" of our city that is rough. It even made it into a rap song by some big shot rapper. Any way, I say this because I could see the job weigh on my dad some over the years. It does harden them a little. And, of course there are always bad apples. But for the most part, they take their job as serving and protecting very seriously. My dad was always "on duty" even when he wasn't, just because he cared that much :001_smile:. I remember him stopping a man who was yelling and a hair shy of beating his girlfriend in the middle of the food court at the mall. Everyone just stared in horror. My dad calmly walked up and insisted on speaking with the man off to the side. The man abruptly left afterward and there was no show or ego on my dads part at all. Most of the officers I know are this way.

 

I can understand how some people are fearful and I can understand that some have had bad experiences. But remember, they never know what they are going to get either. As a youth worker, it appalls me to see how the police are thought of. I have heard every derogatory term in the book and from kids too! I am sure that everyone here does their best to raise dc to respect the police but that is not the norm here. It is the popular thing to "dis" the police.

 

No officer has the "right" to be rude. It is scary to be on the wrong end of it. Hold them accountable with the proper authorities if need be. But, definitely be careful to not fall into that trap of letting them all look the same to you, especially with the words you choose in front of your children. Take heart, I truly believe that the majority serve with good intentions, proper training and good oversight.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

I did call and report a cop who treated me very aggressively. I was driving with a friend in my passenger seat and was pulled over by this cop. I couldn't figure out what I could possibly have been doing wrong. When he came up to my window, he told me to get out of the car. I asked what I had done. He said to get out of the car and he would tell me. I was very hesitant, but figured he wasn't going to do anything bad with my friend in the car. I got out and he asked if I had any weapons. I just looked at him, like, "Are you crazy?" and said no. I was a 24 year old, very innocent looking woman. We were on our way to get dinner. He asked for my license and registration, and I again asked what I had done. He told me to get in the back of his patrol car while he ran the license. I still didn't know why I had been stopped. At this point, I'm terrified. I got in the car, but I was very nervous. So, he ran my license and registration and it seemed to be taking a long time. At this point, my friend got out of my car and started walking back toward the police car. He screamed at her to get back in the car, and then said to me, "What does she think she is doing?" I said that she was probably wondering what was going on. Finally, he gave me back my license and registration and told me that he had stopped me because the light over my rear license plate was out. :confused1::ohmy:angry::mad::cursing::thumbdown:

 

I was SOOOOO upset. I could not believe it. I was in shock that night, but the next day, I called the police department and filed a report against him.

[Nestof3]

Can you say FREAK? :001_huh:

 

I did call and report a cop who treated me very aggressively. I was driving with a friend in my passenger seat and was pulled over by this cop. I couldn't figure out what I could possibly have been doing wrong. When he came up to my window, he told me to get out of the car. I asked what I had done. He said to get out of the car and he would tell me. I was very hesitant, but figured he wasn't going to do anything bad with my friend in the car. I got out and he asked if I had any weapons. I just looked at him, like, "Are you crazy?" and said no. I was a 24 year old, very innocent looking woman. We were on our way to get dinner. He asked for my license and registration, and I again asked what I had done. He told me to get in the back of his patrol car while he ran the license. I still didn't know why I had been stopped. At this point, I'm terrified. I got in the car, but I was very nervous. So, he ran my license and registration and it seemed to be taking a long time. At this point, my friend got out of my car and started walking back toward the police car. He screamed at her to get back in the car, and then said to me, "What does she think she is doing?" I said that she was probably wondering what was going on. Finally, he gave me back my license and registration and told me that he had stopped me because the light over my rear license plate was out. :confused1::ohmy:angry::mad::cursing::thumbdown:

 

I was SOOOOO upset. I could not believe it. I was in shock that night, but the next day, I called the police department and filed a report against him.

[Mrs Mungo]

Well, IMO, I'll cut the officer all the slack he needs since every time he pulls over a car he doesn't know if you're going to be Miss Mommy Nicey-nice or Psychob*tch from H&ll with a loaded gun.

 

Instead of "why'd you pull me over?" you should have waited until he spoke to you first. "Thank you, Officer" and "Have a nice day, Officer" goes a long way, too.

 

Even if he is rude, the fact is that his badge trumps your feelings in that situation. If he gives you a ticket, the time to protest is at your court date.

 

I've found that respectful speech, owning up to speeding or the lack of registration (both of which I've been pulled over for), and a general respectful attitude go a long way. It may not get me out of a ticket (and I don't act that way for that purpose) but it does defuse what could be a very tense situation. I've had police officers thank me and praise me to my kids for the respectful way I've talked to them.

 

I think *in general*, this is true. However, I also agree with those who pointed out there are areas in which police abuses abound.

 

yes, there is a certain personality that is drawn, and, frankly, I think it's the minority that are good decent men.

 

I could not disagree more with this statement.

[Jean in Newcastle]

If you were uncomfortable with how a police officer were acting, would it be ok to call 9-1-1?

[Parrothead]

If you were uncomfortable with how a police officer were acting, would it be ok to call 9-1-1?

Yes!

A bit of advice - if you are ever alone, at night on a deserted road and get blue/red lighted call 911 and make sure it is a real officer stopping you. If they have no record of an officer making a stop, keep driving and drive to the nearest law enforcement office. Blue and red lights are available to the general public from many sources at a cheap price.

 

If you want to get to a more populated area before stopping, call 911 and let them know that you are not running, and what your intentions are. Tell the 911 operator that you are afraid. All 911 calls are supposed to be recorded so even after you talk to the operator, ask him/her to keep the line open and don't hang up.