Rewards & behavior mod strategies....

[Beth in SW WA]

I'm curious what your thoughts are regarding rewards & behavior modification in the context of hs'ing.

 

I'm not a fan of bribing students. But I will say the marble jar is a hit here. They are working toward a marble jar party (ice cream at DQ, lunch at a park, etc). The sound of the marble hitting the other marbles in the jar is a happy sound here. Simple but effective. It will probably take about 20 school days before the jar is full.

 

In our family, we do the love & logic approach. I don't reward my kids for doing chores, family service, obeying parents, being nice, etc. That's just part of being a member of this family.

 

In the context of hs'ing though, I think rewards are appropriate.

 

Sidenote: My girls are extremely compliant and obedient. They are eager learners. Heck, they're little girls who love to 'play' school -- so 'real' school is icing on the cake.

 

Do you reward your kids for completed work, deadlines met, good attitudes, etc? How do you do this?

 

Thanks in advance! :001_smile:

[swainsonshawk]

We have used lots of different things in the past for school work rewards. We don't always have a reward going, but it may be time for one again. I usually reward for compliance, attitude, that sort of thing. We have had candy at the end of the day if they didn't lose all their strikes (sticks). We have had a sticker chart. They have earned something from our "treasure box" weekly for good attitude, etc.

 

Thanks for reminding me. A good reward system would help things go smoothly around here again! I've been dealing with the whines.

 

I think rewarding for school work is different somehow than for chores, etc. Also, rewards are temporary (not all the time), so they don't become bribes. I tend to work with both a carrot and a stick all the time anyway.

[Momof1plustwins]

:lurk5::bigear:

[gpsings]

Great idea! In light of our problems today, I think implementing a reward system could be a good thing.

[Guest FiveLittleMonkeys10]

We don't really have a reward system. I think we should start one though.

 

:lurk5:

[MamaofTwo]

I buy a big roll of tickets at the beginning of the year. They earn tickets for completing their school day with a good attitude, completing certain projects, completing a book, encouraging each other, etc. They can also lose tickets if they are choosing to be snarky or lazy.

 

I have a treasure box full of items that they can purchase with their tickets. I try to keep the items useful and fun (colored pencils, journals, books, stationery, fun toothbrush, colorful hair rubberbands and clips, etc.)

 

I would love for my girls to just do their school work joyfully, with the only reward being thier satisfaction with a job well done. ;) We just aren't there yet. I'm okay with offering rewards in these early years.

[mommycheryl]

I have a treasure box full of items that they can purchase with their tickets. I try to keep the items useful and fun (colored pencils, journals, books, stationery, fun toothbrush, colorful hair rubberbands and clips, etc.)

 

years.

Do you put "prices" on the items or X number of tickets gets you a trip to the prize box?

[Guest FiveLittleMonkeys10]

I buy a big roll of tickets at the beginning of the year. They earn tickets for completing their school day with a good attitude, completing certain projects, completing a book, encouraging each other, etc. They can also lose tickets if they are choosing to be snarky or lazy.

 

I have a treasure box full of items that they can purchase with their tickets. I try to keep the items useful and fun (colored pencils, journals, books, stationery, fun toothbrush, colorful hair rubberbands and clips, etc.)

 

I would love for my girls to just do their school work joyfully, with the only reward being thier satisfaction with a job well done. ;) We just aren't there yet. I'm okay with offering rewards in these early years.

 

I remember doing this in middle school.

 

All the prizes were priced differently. Pencils were like two tickets, and toys were like 10-50 tickets.

 

I think I might use this. I loved it :)

[Tonia]

I give rewards for certain things. I picked up a few punch cards from rainbow resource and I keep a box of prizes (nice quality but fairly inexpensive things - clay kits, wikki stix, small craft kits). I keep a punch with a specific shape and punch out a square as she completes different tasks. When the card is completely punched she gets to choose a prize from the prize box. Right now she has cards for memorizing Scripture and reading daily for 30 minutes.

[merry gardens]

:lurk5:...

Popcorn! Great idea!

 

I reward my children with food treats, small trinkets, or occassionally a DVD movie of the child's choice. I give one little thing per day, like lolly-pop, a piece of chocolate, granola bar, a "state" quarter, some little free-bee trinkets, etc. At the end of a good week or the end of a big unit, perhaps I'll do something bigger, like a special DVD movie.

 

I found a program to help my son with his dyslexia, but he didn't want to do it. I offer him a small treat after each session--if he co-operates. He has to earn his reward by working hard and co-operating. On the rare occassion now when he starts acting up, I simply tell him he won't get his treat if this continues. He straightens right up! I started doing that with my other children too. I sometimes even give myself a little chocolate treat too, if I earned it.

 

One little treat per day can work magic!

[kalanamak]

 

Do you reward your kids for completed work, deadlines met, good attitudes, etc? How do you do this?

 

 

Doing his work without any brattiness: a bowl of ice cream for dessert.

Above and beyond work: an extra half an hour up at night

 

Most days he gets his ice cream, about once a week he gets to stay up late.

 

I don't know how we started this...we just seemed to fall into it.

[sagira]

It sounds like a great idea, setting up a reward system. That said, the only successful reward system I've been able to implement was for potty training when ds was little. Stickers on a homemade chart by the toilet. I'm too distracted and forgetful to keep up with one nowadays! What jar? Where's the jar? Wait, where are the marbles? What are we rewarding for? :tongue_smilie::lol:

[naturelovinmama]

Wow, I love all of these ideas! Thanks, ladies!!

[Wildiris]

In the context of home schooling, incentives or rewards for a more cooperative student or....(fill in with kind of behavior you want to effect a change with) can work for an immediate goal, but to effect long term change it may be less successful.

 

I realize this is tangential to this discussion, but I wrote a short piece about bribing students in public school (Motivating Students), asking the question of whether public school kids should be paid for attending school, getting good grades, achieving good behavior etc. While writing this piece I came across the work of Carol Dweck. The linked piece above has a YouTube video of Dweck discussing her book Mindset, The New Psychology of Success. Unfortunately I just picked up this book from the library so I cannot give too much of a review. The Amazon link has a good over view of the book and the public reviews are worth reading to get an idea of what others think about the concept of Mindset.

 

From the book-jacket :

 

"...mindset unfolds in childhood and adulthood and drives every aspect of our lives...Dweck has found that everyone has one of two basic mindsets. If you have a fixed mindset, you believe that your talents and abilities are set in stone. If you have a growth mindset,however, you know that talents can be developed and that the great abilities are built over time."

 

In the book there is a chapter about teachers, parents and coaches that talks about the words we use when we praise a child and how those words effect a student's mindset and in turn effects their motivation in school.

 

Dweck also has a program called The Brainology.

 

I thought some might find this interesting, and I wanted to share.

Iris

[papillon]

Great ideas, everyone!

[Amber in AUS]

We generally do something special when we finish a book or level in something (math & LA mostly). It is a little celebration of what they have achieved and also a motivator to keep working hard towards their next reward. We might go out for ice-cream or go to a cafe for a milkshake etc. It is fun and the kids look forward to it. We don't reward day to day, it is expected they will do their best effort the first time.

[Snowfall]

In the context of home schooling, incentives or rewards for a more cooperative student or....(fill in with kind of behavior you want to effect a change with) can work for an immediate goal, but to effect long term change it may be less successful.

 

I so completely agree with you in theory. In practice, I'm not so successful at getting DD's cooperation without some external motivation. :glare: I don't know what I'm doing wrong...:001_huh:

[nikkinic]

My son had a very bad taste in his mouth from ps. So when we first started hs'ing he never wanted to do work. I gave him a cup and I told him that each day he had the oppurtunity to earn up to 30 bingo chips each day for good behavior. Each chip was worth one minute of computer/videogame time. I would also occasionally take away chips for really bad behavior, but I tried to use it mostly for positive reinforcement. It worked like a charm for him.

[Jolana]

I'm not sure what age your dc are, but this is what I do for my K, 5th and 6th graders. For my K child, I put her work in a basket; when she is done with them, then she gets to play Sudoku on her Nintendo DS, or play online games for 30 min. For my older two, I write down what they need to do for the day, and when they are done, they can play on their Nintendo DS or whatever. The only time my kids get to play Nintendo is when we are driving somewhere or when their work is done; therefore, it is a big motivator for them. With this strategy, I see a big improvement in their study habits. They no longer talk incessantly or bicker with each other during study time and more motivated to get their work done.

[Beth in SW WA]

Great ideas, one and all! :001_smile:

[Tracy]

I think behavior modification techniques absolutely have their place. They can help to motivate and provide a feeling of accomplishment. But they are sometimes used when the problem lies elsewhere. If children are having trouble in school, it may be because there are learning disabilities, or giftedness that causes boredom. Or the problem may be in the relationship between parent-teacher and the children. I highly recommend reading The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman and Hold Onto Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers by Gordon Neufeld, both of with highlight some common problems with children that negatively affect their homeschooling experience.