eight_gregorys Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I don't usually post much about my personal life, but right now I don't have anyone else to talk to about this sooo.....My Grandma was just put in Hospice. She has multiple myeloma and has been sick for several years. I love her dearly. She is honestly one of my favorite people in the whole world. My mom is falling apart right now so I'm trying to be strong for her, but I am having a terrible time dealing with this. I know that she is going to be with God and that she will be finally be free of pain, but she's my Nanny and I have just always expected her to be there. Tonight she called all of her children together to come see her. This is the same thing my great-grandma did several hours before she passed. I'm just scared that I won't see her again as she has asked for just her children to come see her tomorrow. Thanks for listening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue in WI Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1bassoon Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: Andrea - I'm in a slightly similar situation. My dear grandma, now 91, was given 2 weeks to live back last August, due to her advanced colon cancer. My cousins and I flew to her bedside, to love on her one last time. It's almost May. Grandma didn't get the memo that "hospice" and "advanced colon cancer" means that death is imminent. She's still with us, and for them most part pretty aware. Have patience, dear. I'll pray you get one last time to love on her - but if you don't, it sounds like she already knows how you feel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 So sorry! I hope that you do get to see her again to say goodbye. Sometimes when people are dying though, they need to cut off contact from almost everyone. It's their way of letting go. Maybe after your mom sees her tomorrow, she'll know whether you could go see her. My husband had a friend who died very young--early 30's of melanoma. He got married right after he found out that it had recurred and was stage 4. As he was dying, he wanted to just be with his wife and my dh at the end. He wanted to say good-bye to his parents about a week before he died. After that, he did not want to see his parents after that. This was probably at least in part because his mother was having a very hard time letting go--not just because he was dying but because she was overly tied to him anyway. He needed the space to go on .That was very hard on his mother, but it was what was good for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mejane Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Perhaps she hopes to spare you, still thinking of you as her grand-child? Or maybe she hasn't accepted that it's time. I wasn't there when my mother died, but I knew the moment it happened. She was with me - went through me, if that makes any sense. The people we love, who love us, are not separate from us. I hope you can feel peace about whatever happens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pata Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: I know how hard it can be lose those you love! I've lost both my Mom and my Nana and didn't get a chance to say goodbye, but with my Grammy I was there when she died. I don't know which is worse, it's all hard. I'll be thinking about you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaAkins Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I'm sorry for the impending loss of your dearly loved Nanny. I pray that your spirits will be lifted by happy memories of her and knowing that she lived a good life. I pray that God will grant you peace, even in your sorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LunaLee Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: That is all. This is all too close to home for me to say the right thing right now, but I just wanted to give you virtual hugs.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KristenS Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 ((hugs)) It was hard watching my grandpa die. He'd been the healthiest old man you ever saw, and then went downhill after moving back South here to be near family. His doctor just kept medicating him, and he kept slipping away, and ending up in the hospital, till one smart doc realized half his issues were actually med side effects! So for a brief time, we had our beloved grandpa back. He got sicker again, though, and it was pretty clear the end was near. Not a hospice sort of thing though. We were all at the hospital, and it was so hard, and he just wasn't 'there'. One of our pastors came by, and shocked me by praying for him to go ahead and let go, that we were all okay with that, and we wanted him to be happy and healthy again. Part of me was offended because I didn't WANT to let him go ... but part of me was glad she was brave enough to say such a prayer (which is what my mom and grandma did need to hear). Afterwards there was a sense of peace, and a few hours later my sister and I went home. A couple hours after that, he passed away ... peacefully. It was pretty amazing ... as if he really was just holding on until he had permission to let go. I don't know if this story helps you or not ... but if there's someone you trust enough to pray for everyone to be able to let go, it can be a very powerful thing. Either way, I am so sorry you're in this hurting place. It is so hard to watch a loved one suffer, and to also have to suport other loved ones during the process. ((hugs)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I Tonight she called all of her children together to come see her. How lucky lucky lucky to have family to come together. I sometimes attend death when no one comes. :grouphug: To every thing there is a season. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebug42 Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I am so sorry for your pain and the loss you have begun to experience. I lost my Dad last year and it just hurts. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cortana Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 I was in your shoes just a few short weeks ago when my precious grandma passed away. I wanted to be there so badly but couldn't go and she was just asking for her children. My mom had to go by herself, she said it was good I didn't go, I wouldn't want to see my grandma like that. She had been very sick and had wasted away til she no longer looked like my memaw. We got to see her last summer when she was still relatively well and could enjoy seeing her great-grandchildren. I will have those memories forever. It still hurst that I wasn't there. I'm sure she loves you dearly. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eight_gregorys Posted April 25, 2010 Author Share Posted April 25, 2010 Thank you for all your thoughts and hugs. I just got a call from my mom and Nanny is gone. She was with all her children when she left this earth. I'm glad that she is no longer in pain, but I miss her already. She was such a unique, talented, and special woman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted April 25, 2010 Share Posted April 25, 2010 Thank you for all your thoughts and hugs. I just got a call from my mom and Nanny is gone. She was with all her children when she left this earth. I'm glad that she is no longer in pain, but I miss her already. She was such a unique, talented, and special woman. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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