How do you go "natural" if you've been coloring your hair?

[Perry]

My hair used to be naturally dark brown, almost black. I've been covering the gray for over 10 years, and don't know how much gray I'd have if I stopped coloring. Judging from my roots, it's a lot. I'm thinking about just letting it go gray, but how do you do that gradually? I don't really want the bottom half black and the top half white. :D

[PiCO]

My hair used to be naturally dark brown, almost black. I've been covering the gray for over 10 years, and don't know how much gray I'd have if I stopped coloring. Judging from my roots, it's a lot. I'm thinking about just letting it go gray, but how do you do that gradually? I don't really want the bottom half black and the top half white. :D

 

I would start highlighting instead of coloring all the hair. Gradually decrease the number of strands you highlight, and pretty soon it's all natural.

[NoPlaceLikeHome]

You could try semi-permanent hair color as it grows out. I found that even a lighter color colors my hair even though the hair stylist insisted that it would not.

[happygrrl]

Well, I bit the bullet and cut it off! First I cut it shorter and tousled, so that the different color roots looked like they were there on purpose (sort of a grown up punk style). When those roots got 3" I chopped it all off. I got so many compliments and admiring glances that I am considering going short again. It was so fun! I am in the "if you can't hide it flaunt it" camp though, YMMV.

[Aubrey]

I've wondered about this--somebody should sell something, like a kit, w/ different colors for every 6wks until it's there. Natural. Although I guess this wouldn't be too good for their business would it?

 

But what about dying the whole thing gray/white (instead of black) & adding darker hilights (so you don't shock people)?

 

Aubrey, who has no experience but little white hairs starting to play peek-a-boo.

[NancyNellen]

Timely question, as I've been wondering the same thing recently. There has to be a natural way to do it, as I can never remember seeing someone with half brown, half white hair.:tongue_smilie:

[Cindy in NY]

A family friend recently decided to stop coloring. She is Peruvian and has colored her hair black for years. She went to a salon and had the color stripped from her hair. It looked looked like the pretty whitish gray that some people naturally have. It sounds rather harsh but it didn't seem to damage her hair.

[mcconnellboys]

What about those rinses that wash out after about three weeks? After doing a few of those, would your hair have grown out enough?

[i.love.lucy]

Perry, are you worried at all about it making you look a lot older? I just feel like at 42 I have so much gray that it will be too pronounced for my age and make me look older. Instead of having a pretty color to enhance my skin tone, it'll be steely and washed out and sort of...yuck. Even if I thought I'd have that gorgeous white hair that some ladies get, it seems you wouldn't want that until you are in your 60s, right?

 

Maybe I'm vain... I'd sure love to be able to quick coloring, but I just don't think I can yet.

[HollyDay]

I used to color mine blonde. My natural color was a light to medium brown. I had the colorist match the roots as closely as possible. I also cut off about 3 inches because the bottom was getting rather "brassy". When the new color faded, it was so close to my natural that it was no problem. By the way, my hairstylist told me Redkin (I think that is the one) is coming out with a wonderful new coloring process that hides grey beautifully. Gee, wonder why she told me that???

 

Now, my other gf IRL, goes to the local health food store and gets a natural color product that she just washes in every 8 weeks or so. It looks great!

[Doran]

Four years ago, at the age of 44, I decided I was sick of dying my hair. I had mostly used the permanent vegetable dyes available at natural food stores (Naturtint), except for a single professional coloring years earlier, which I disliked, and true henna before that. I'd been covering gray since the age of 29, and I was ready to be free of that drudgery. Contrary to the poster who felt she wouldn't want gray hair until she was in her 60s, I believed I would want to "go gray" even less in my 60s than at a younger age. I figured, by then, other parts of me might not look so youthful or perky anymore. For me, it felt smarter to let the gray show when I was still "youthful" in most other ways and could handle the emotional struggle of the transition. And, yeah, it was kind of a struggle. Its hard to let the world see the real you. And, it's easy to consider copping out part way through and just go back to coloring...especially when/if you get the two tone thing going, like I did.

 

But, now that it's done, I'll never go back! I get compliments on my hair, and I finally feel like the real me.

 

My hair is long, thick, curly, and slow growing. The last few times I colored it, I chose gradually lighter shades, which, by the last coloring, faded to nearly blonde (my hair is/was naturally a medium-dark brown). That way, when the gray came in, there was less of a contrast. I chose to not cut off the length of my hair, instead pinning it up in ways that sort of masked the bi-color thing. A lot of women go with a short style to decrease the time it takes for full grow out. Others follow suggestions you've been given here. I just wanted you to hear from someone not yet 50 who now sports a head full of gray!

 

The other day, I was talking with my teenage daughters about how it seems pubescent girls all strive to look 20-something, and how older women all seem to want to look 30-something. And how that just seems crazy to me!! Living beings age, but human females are the only group I know of who work so danged hard at hiding that from the world. In Native American tribes, age - and the gray hair and wrinkles that come with it - was laudable and indicative of wisdom. I've guess I've struck out on my own little personal mission to bring some reality back into the aging process. :D

 

Here's a website you may find inspiring/helpful. I've attached a photo that shows more of my hair than me.

 

Best wishes!

[happygrrl]

Doran- I like your posts, but this one tops them all. What a lovely post! I couldn't agree more.

 

Just let me add that I think women with dyed hair often *look* older than they are (dodging tomatoes here...). I think the hair and skin go together.. as my skin gets wrinkles my hair gets softer in color, it sort of diffuses the whole thing :). My g-friends that have that same head of hair they had in their 20's? Every wrinkle sticks out like it was in direct, unflattering light. Most people just get stuck on the hair part and don't look at the whole picture.

 

(And I'm only 39)

(and I hope none of my IRL friends are reading this)

[i.love.lucy]

Contrary to the poster who felt she wouldn't want gray hair until she was in her 60s, I believed I would want to "go gray" even less in my 60s than at a younger age.

I totally see your point. I don't think I really meant that you'd *want* gray hair in your 60's but more that it's then that it seems more appropriate somehow. One of my best friend's mom is GORGEOUS with her gray/white hair. She always looks pulled together and it goes with her so nicely. But I have seen PLENTY of women - like you! - who go gray a lot earlier and look great with it.

 

I think if I had hair like yours, and probably if my kids were still so young, I might do it. I have fine, stick-straight, limp hair. So the gray ones look like those tinsel icicles that you put on Christmas trees. All wild and kinky like. I think if the rest of my hair had any body or wave to it it would make sense.

 

BTW, Doran, I love your hair! I have always had a kind of Bohemian/hippie/crunch side secretly and would love to have that kind of naturally curly and gray hair. I think it's sexy!!:tongue_smilie:

 

The whole thing goes back to whatever makes you feel good and confident. Gray, white, blonde, black with pink streaks. Whatever makes you feel good and is *you*.

 

I like this idea of color stripping. Is that like the opposite of dying? I wonder how badly it damages your hair?

[MomLovesClassics]

I have never colored my hair. But one day there was a lady, and the hairdresser said to dye your hair back to it's natural color at once would be a shock. She frosted that lady's hair her natural color and it blended in with the hair that was dyed. She looked really nice more natural, and her roots didn't even show. But this was a someone who dyed their hair blond, whose hair was brown.

[KidsHappen]

I know this one! I helped my mother with it. My mother had naturally black hair and we she started greying she used the color that washes out in 24 shampoos that was abou two shades lighter than her natural color so that it looked like highlights. As the amount of grey increased she got a lighter color so that it looked like even more highlights and she kept this up until she was almost entirely grey on then cut off any remaining darker colors left at the bottom.

 

I am getting ready to do something like this with my 13 year old. She was born with blond hair but it has gotten darker over the years until it is a very dark blond or light brown. She decided she wanted to go back to her natural blond so we did. We did the top lighter with a darker underneath. Now that the roots have grown out she has a couple inches of dark roots, a couple inches of blond and then at least a foot of close to her natural color. I intend to dye it all as close as possible to her natural color with the 24 shampoo color. That way when the roots grow out they will match, it will cover up the blond and mix in with the natural color at the ends. IMO, coloring is simply too much work unless you go with the 24 shampoo, wash out stuff.

 

I have never colored and I am glad. I used to perm and that grows out ok but is still a lot of maintenance. I am getting ready to go with a simply cut that works with my hair and doesn't take a lot of work.

[PiCO]

Even if I thought I'd have that gorgeous white hair that some ladies get, it seems you wouldn't want that until you are in your 60s, right?

 

 

I know a handful of people who had that gorgeous white hair at 25 or 30.

[Eleni]

I would think going with highlights, and then getting a shorter haircut, and letting it be a process.

 

I took my hair back to natural.....but it was pink to begin with. :tongue_smilie: Then I couldn't handle having dark brown hair anymore..and my kids said they like it better all the fun colors because then they can always find me...so it is back to pink.

 

Hair is fun. :D

[BeckyFL]

Oh, I'm so glad for this thread!!! I have never colored my hair and honestly it's not really in my nature. I'm 48 and recently my friend and her daughters have been talking to me about "doing something" since I have some gray showing up and my son's wedding around the corner. I've had some recent complements from people I haven't seen for a long time and between that and this thread I think I'll skip it for good! How liberating. Thanks!

[sparrow]

Gray is currently "hip" and "in":D:

 

http://runway.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/04/01/young-trendsetters-streak-their-hair-with-gray/

[Perry]

Thanks for all the suggestions. I have an appointment for color next week and I'll talk to my stylist about it. I think I know what she's going to say.;)

[Perry]

Perry, are you worried at all about it making you look a lot older?

Yes, definitely! My dh is 5 years younger, so I'm a little concerned that it will make the age difference even more obvious. I know it shouldn't bother me, but it does. :tongue_smilie:

 

I'm 51, and the last year or two I've really started to notice my appearance changing. I don't much like it. But my current color is starting to feel very fake and artificial. I wish I could know what it would look like if I let it go natural. If it looked like Doran's, I'd do it in a heartbeat. But I think it's going to be very kinky, wiry, dark steel gray. Yuk.