Jean in Newcastle Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 I asked them if they would like to join us for a field trip to the art museum since their was an exhibit on ancient art (we're doing ancients). Grandma and Grandpa said, "yes". I was happy because I was feeling guilty about not including them in our school at all in the past. Well, is this weird to you?! They picked us up and when we got to the museum, they said, "Oh, we don't want to go in. We hate that kind of stuff. Call us on the cell when you want to go home!" I guess they thought I wanted a chauffer?? Oh, well, I'm not going to feel guilty anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Peregrine Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 :eek: Weird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.griff Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 :lol: You just never know, huh? At least you do now, LOL. No more guilt, for sure! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 I don't even know what to say.:blink: I wouldn't feel guilty any more, either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CookieMonster Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 They picked us up and when we got to the museum, they said, "Oh, we don't want to go in. We hate that kind of stuff. Call us on the cell when you want to go home!" I guess they thought I wanted a chauffer?? Oh, well, I'm not going to feel guilty anymore. If it were me I'd feel even guiltier now. I'd be so upset that I was misunderstood to thinking I wanted a chauffer instead of their company. I'd say something, sometime, to them to let them know that I hadn't asked them to come just for a ride. Depending upon their resonse, I would either be relieved and have new companions for field trips, or be relieved and know that they don't want to be involved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in NH Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 Wow! I'd be a bit ticked off and confused.:confused: We've never invited any of our relatives to do any field trips with us. Mostly because they don't live near us or I already know it wouldn't be welcome! Feel no more guilt! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 I asked them if they would like to join us for a field trip to the art museum since their was an exhibit on ancient art (we're doing ancients). Grandma and Grandpa said, "yes". I was happy because I was feeling guilty about not including them in our school at all in the past. Well, is this weird to you?! They picked us up and when we got to the museum, they said, "Oh, we don't want to go in. We hate that kind of stuff. Call us on the cell when you want to go home!" I guess they thought I wanted a chauffer?? Oh, well, I'm not going to feel guilty anymore. That's bizarre behavior. What does your dh say? Does he have any translation? Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 We had the same thing happen a few years ago. EX, the kids and I, went to visit his grandparents in WV. We wanted to drive up to see Falling Waters in PA and invited them to join us. The seemed eager to go (and even consulted at least 3 other people about the best route, the weather, etc. Getting an act of congress passed would have been less stressful). So, anyway, off we go for a several-hour drive. We get there, and all get out of the car except for his grandparents! They said, "Oh, we've been here before, you just do the tour, we'll wait in the car." Well, we had to wait an hour for a tour group and we had lunch in the little cafe. They would NOT get out of the car for anything but a bathroom trip. They wouldn't eat with us, nothing. They said, "We'll eat on the way home!" And, on the way home, they rejected restaurant after restaurant for this reason or other. (any "cookie-cutter" places that had a bar or served alcohol were off limits. PERIOD. That included any pizza joint, Applebees, TGIF, etc. Fast food wasn't good enough. On and on) It was the most perplexing and stressful day! (Falling Waters is wonderful and a must-see even for those who aren't necessarily Wright fans.) Why do people do this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted March 16, 2008 Author Share Posted March 16, 2008 Dh just laughed. He's sure they understood the invitation. But it did explain a lot when he told me that his parents only attended one soccer game that he played as a kid - one (and he was on a soccer team for years!):001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DIY-DY Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 I asked them if they would like to join us for a field trip to the art museum since their was an exhibit on ancient art (we're doing ancients). Grandma and Grandpa said, "yes". I was happy because I was feeling guilty about not including them in our school at all in the past. Well, is this weird to you?! They picked us up and when we got to the museum, they said, "Oh, we don't want to go in. We hate that kind of stuff. Call us on the cell when you want to go home!" I guess they thought I wanted a chauffer?? Oh, well, I'm not going to feel guilty anymore. Two summers ago, MIL and BIL came out w/ BIL's two dd's. MIL stayed two weeks, and BIL and nieces stayed one week. It was SUCH a bizarre experience all the way around - but something like this happened more than once. During MIL's time alone w/ us, we had a swim play date in town. I asked her if she'd like to go and she said yes. Then we got there, and she wouldn't get out. It was SO HOT, and I finally suggested she hit up some of the antique shops while the boys swam. Thankfully, she took the car and went, b/c I felt SO bad about her sitting there like that. Then BIL and his dd's returned and during their stay, one of our hs support groups hosted a berry picking field trip. It's at a great little locally owned farm, and I thought it would be a fun outing. So I asked BIL and MIL if they'd like to go, and they said sure. I asked the girls if they'd like to go, and they said it sounded like fun. I RSVP'd to the group with the # of people in our group, and all was well. We got up the morning of the outing, and *nobody* would get ready to go. Nor would they answer me when I asked if they were ready, or if they needed anything to get ready. Oodles of hemming and hawing, and finally, MIL said they wanted to stay home that day and just wouldn't go at all. :confused: So, the kids and I went, had a great time, picked extra berries to share w/ the IL's... and I spent the time wondering if they'd felt strong-armed into saying yes, or perhaps if I'd somehow offended them at some point and they didn't want to tell me. I just couldn't figure it out. On our drive home, BIL called my cell phone to say they were at a mall and he wanted to know if there was someplace near it where they could eat. During the course of the conversation, he said they hadn't wanted to go on the field trip because, "we just don't know how you homeschool people do things, and you have ALL THOSE KIDS, we didn't want to get in the way". Um.... oooookay... :huh: I just called DH and laughingly told him that if mental illness manifests itself in any of our children, I am *so* pinning it on his genes. ;) Sometimes you just can't figure out what goes through other people's minds. Just gotta love 'em where they're at and be willing to go with the flow (even when it seems suspiciously uphill...) And hey, like you said, at least you have no guilt now! Bonus! Dy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plaid Dad Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 That is weird. Whatever happened to "No, thank you" possibly followed by "but let's meet up for lunch afterward"? :001_huh: I think I'm going to add another talking point to my "why we homeschool" list: training in clear and effective communication. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doran Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 People are strange. And, I am of the ilk that I probably would not have held my tongue in a similar situation. I'd have been compelled to say, "What?! Then why on earth did you come?!" I just called DH and laughingly told him that if mental illness manifests itself in any of our children, I am *so* pinning it on his genes. ;) Sometimes you just can't figure out what goes through other people's minds. Just gotta love 'em where they're at and be willing to go with the flow (even when it seems suspiciously uphill...) And hey, like you said, at least you have no guilt now! Bonus! I nearly gave myself a sore neck nodding at Dy's remarks. Although I'm told my kids only look like my husband's family (yea, right!) I generally offer in response that that must also be where they've inherited their flaws! :001_rolleyes: But, Plaid Dad really hit the bullseye as far as I'm concerned. Your inlaws behavior was weird, no two ways about it. But, sadly, not uncommon. If I don't teach my kids anything else during our homeschool experience, I want them to know how to communicate effectively. Nothing makes me battier than adults who can't say what they mean. I think I'm going to add another talking point to my "why we homeschool" list: training in clear and effective communication. Doran Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 They got to spend some time with their grandchildren in the car. They got to enjoy the excitement of the kids after the kids saw the exhibit. I think it is fine. I know there are things that my parents did with us that they are "over" now and don't really care to do with the grandkids. It isn't that they don't do enough with my kids or my sisters' kids. They just pick and choose what they are going to do. And I think that is ok. Maybe I am weird? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted March 16, 2008 Share Posted March 16, 2008 Of course I wasn't there but it seems very sweet to me. They must have really wanted to spend the time with you guys even though it was not their thing. Laurel T. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaMere Academy Posted March 17, 2008 Share Posted March 17, 2008 I asked them if they would like to join us for a field trip to the art museum since their was an exhibit on ancient art (we're doing ancients). Grandma and Grandpa said, "yes". I was happy because I was feeling guilty about not including them in our school at all in the past. Well, is this weird to you?! They picked us up and when we got to the museum, they said, "Oh, we don't want to go in. We hate that kind of stuff. Call us on the cell when you want to go home!" I guess they thought I wanted a chauffer?? Oh, well, I'm not going to feel guilty anymore. That is very, very strange! :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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