Am I being overly sensitive?

[zaichiki]

:001_huh:

 

That is so rude! "The type of people working as cashiers . . ."

 

I think cashiers are just varied.

 

Ha! Of COURSE cashiers are varied...

 

MY mistake was in not being very specific with my comment: I was refering to the TYPE of cashiers that make the TYPE of comments the OP (and several other posters) was/were complaining about. Those TYPES of cashiers...

 

I've met some great supermarket cashiers. I just don't think that MOST of them fit that description... at least not where I live. Or... maybe I don't frequent the "right" supermarkets?

 

:)

[LatinLover]

I'm accustomed to speaking with cashiers and generally enjoy the chit-chat; however, one lady a couple of years ago really took the cake. Due to some symptoms I was having, I had to have a colonoscopy and was *very* nervous about both the procedure and the potential results. Anyway, I was at the grocery store buying the supplies to prepare for the next day and the cashier in her loudest voice says "Looks like someone's having a colonoscopy"! Boy did I feel like crawling under the floor! It's kind of funny now but I was really embarassed at the time.

[EKS]

I'm accustomed to speaking with cashiers and generally enjoy the chit-chat; however, one lady a couple of years ago really took the cake. Due to some symptoms I was having, I had to have a colonoscopy and was *very* nervous about both the procedure and the potential results. Anyway, I was at the grocery store buying the supplies to prepare for the next day and the cashier in her loudest voice says "Looks like someone's having a colonoscopy"! Boy did I feel like crawling under the floor! It's kind of funny now but I was really embarassed at the time.

 

This does take the cake. What I experienced today was absolutely trivial by comparison--beyond trivial! Yikes!

[zaichiki]

Mom was lecturing him the whole time, finishing off with, "Do you want to end up a loser working at Safeway like her?" and pointed at me. :cursing:

 

 

Interestingly enough, last week we were at Wendy's where the cashier (a nice, but obviously NEW and not-too-sure-what-to-do-yet, college-aged kid) told my daughter that she better study hard in school so she doesn't end up working as a cashier at Wendy's!

 

I tried to distract them both by pointing to the back/kitchen where we could see other young people trying desperately to keep up with orders. I smiled, turned to my dd, and said, "Look at that! She can make 3 burgers at once. They're really busy back there, aren't they?" Luckily, the cashier took the hint and dropped a few compliments about his fellow-fast-food-workers.

 

Honestly, though... I really *wouldn't* want my dd to work at Wendy's out of necessity. I'd like her to have more career options.

[fshinkevich]

Interestingly enough, last week we were at Wendy's where the cashier (a nice, but obviously NEW and not-too-sure-what-to-do-yet, college-aged kid) told my daughter that she better study hard in school so she doesn't end up working as a cashier at Wendy's!

 

I tried to distract them both by pointing to the back/kitchen where we could see other young people trying desperately to keep up with orders. I smiled, turned to my dd, and said, "Look at that! She can make 3 burgers at once. They're really busy back there, aren't they?" Luckily, the cashier took the hint and dropped a few compliments about his fellow-fast-food-workers.

 

Honestly, though... I really *wouldn't* want my dd to work at Wendy's out of necessity. I'd like her to have more career options.

 

 

I'm really, truly sorry if I am coming off as offensive, but I would not be at all upset if my child chose Wendys as their career, so long as they were happy. I don't think there is anything wrong with retail jobs, or any job, so long as you are content in life.

 

I have friends that range from cleaning up poo (seriously, they work with poo) to working at NASA. I love them all dearly, and don't think one is better than the other. They are all intelligent, all graduated high school, and most of them college.

 

Obviously there are times when a person cannot get a better job because of their intellect or desire, but mostly a job doesn't make a person. People can work the most meaningless job, and do the most amazing things on their off time.

[zaichiki]

Do you honestly think that most people who (as an example) work at Wendy's as cashiers or on the "burger line" choose that job because it is what they wanted to do as a career? (I'm not talking about those with mental challenges.)

 

I don't judge people based on their jobs. I'm glad you don't either.

 

I just want my children to be well educated and have more options for their futures. Most people who are classically-minded homeschoolers would share this hope for their children, I would guess. I hope that doesn't offend YOU.

 

 

I'm really, truly sorry if I am coming off as offensive, but I would not be at all upset if my child chose Wendys as their career, so long as they were happy. I don't think there is anything wrong with retail jobs, or any job, so long as you are content in life.

 

I have friends that range from cleaning up poo (seriously, they work with poo) to working at NASA. I love them all dearly, and don't think one is better than the other. They are all intelligent, all graduated high school, and most of them college.

 

Obviously there are times when a person cannot get a better job because of their intellect or desire, but mostly a job doesn't make a person. People can work the most meaningless job, and do the most amazing things on their off time.

[fshinkevich]

Do you honestly think that most people who (as an example) work at Wendy's as cashiers or on the "burger line" choose that job because it is what they wanted to do as a career? (I'm not talking about those with mental challenges.)

 

I don't judge people based on their jobs. I'm glad you don't either.

 

I just want my children to be well educated and have more options for their futures. Most people who are classically-minded homeschoolers would share this hope for their children, I would guess. I hope that doesn't offend YOU.

 

 

Well, I do know a few people who don't really mind their jobs, not everyone see's it as life fulfillment so much as a way to pay the bills. . PG&E, Via Mia Pizza, Intel, whatever.

 

I want my children to be well educated as well. I hope I am providing that for them, regardless of what they choose as employment.

[lovetobehome]

I'm accustomed to speaking with cashiers and generally enjoy the chit-chat; however, one lady a couple of years ago really took the cake. Due to some symptoms I was having, I had to have a colonoscopy and was *very* nervous about both the procedure and the potential results. Anyway, I was at the grocery store buying the supplies to prepare for the next day and the cashier in her loudest voice says "Looks like someone's having a colonoscopy"! Boy did I feel like crawling under the floor! It's kind of funny now but I was really embarassed at the time.

 

THAT is hysterical!

I went to the drug store last week and bought some contraception. I am a married mom of 3. The clerk looked like he was about 16, and he was the only one there (trust me, I was hoping for a female clerk). Obviously, he was uncomfortable. He asked, "Would you like a bag?" I almost laughed. Of COURSE I want a bag to put my contraception in! Or, should I carry it out like a badge, declaring to everyone what I was going to be up to that night with DH?

:lol:

[fivetails]

....

Edited September 6, 2009 by fivetails
Kittens!

[zaichiki]

*blink*

 

I can't believe I just read that. Good grief. :lol:

 

Good grief indeed!

 

Do you think that cashiers' comments (personal opinions on what you buy) some have complained about here are appropriate? Don't you think that, instead of being offended by the commments, we should try to be understanding that the TYPE of people that make them may not understand that they are inappropriate? And, BTW, (thanks to the limit of my posted communication) my comment about feeling sorry for them was 100% connected to what I wrote in parentheses: that their job is likely boring and they could just be trying to strike up conversation to keep from being bored.

 

I can tell now that most people did not connect my "feel sorry for them" comment with what I wrote in the parentheses. Also, I should have been very specific that I wasn't refering to ALL cashiers, but only the "type" that make socially inappropriate comments to strangers.

 

Nuff said.

Edited September 6, 2009 by zaichiki
more

[Renee in NC]

:iagree:

 

I worked with some very intelligent people when I was at a grocery store. And honestly, it paid very well (20 an hour, once I became a checker) and had the BEST health/dental plan I have ever come across. As I said above, I am extremely grateful to be able to stay home with my kids, I wouldn't trade it for the world, but as far as part time jobs go, you can't beat a grocery store. The managers pulled in 100k a year, worked 8am -6pm, and had an awesome medical plan. Whats so bad about that?

 

$20 an hour?!?!?! No wonder CA has such a high cost of living. Here (and in NC) you made about $7.50-8.50 an hour!

[fshinkevich]

$20 an hour?!?!?! No wonder CA has such a high cost of living. Here (and in NC) you made about $7.50-8.50 an hour!

 

 

I think it's the other way around! Very lucky to get into grocery stores around here - it is a highly coveted job. Rent is insane. Cereal cost 5 or more dollars. It's nuts.

 

Like I said, I am very grateful to have a DH that makes enough for me to stay home.

[fivetails]

....

Edited September 6, 2009 by fivetails
Kittens!

[Tree House Academy]

High COL area.

 

 

Ah yes! I forget that we live in a lower COL area sometimes. *duh* :D

[zaichiki]

It was the "type of people" remark specifically... you can't put people in boxes like that, y'know? There isn't any sort of "type" of person who works as a cashier. There are young people, old people, shy people, outgoing people, wealthy people, low income people, people who have been to university and earned a bazillion degrees, people who never got past the end of elementary school...the list goes on...

 

Whatever. I actually worked as a cashier once (meaning a time ago, not one time only). If I was putting people in boxes, I'd be doing it to myself... so... not my intention. Perhaps I didn't express myself clearly enough...

 

The type of cashier who would make a comment about someone going for a colonoscopy, or their feminine products, ... well... I would just try to assume that they were the type who wouldn't realize that was inappropriate. This sort of cashier seems to be rather common where I live.

 

Although... I went to a Whole Foods in another town and was quite impressed with the cashiers there. They were polite and well-spoken... Too bad I can't afford to shop there more often.

Edited September 6, 2009 by zaichiki

[Mrs Mungo]

I'm in a rush so I'm committing the cardinal sin of not reading the entire thread, only the initial post. Yes, I think you're being a big sensitive. *Most* people don't really care what kind of groceries you buy, when your baby started sleeping through the night or what school your kids go to. They are just trying to make small talk.

 

I will say this-once when my hubby was deployed I started my period in the middle of the night, while I had a terrible cold. I had to drag all of my kids out of bed and go to WalMart (which, I hate on a good day) while we were all in our pajamas. I bought: tampons, midol, cold medicine, chocolate and soda. The young, male cashier wouldn't even look at me. I think he was in fear of his life if he made the wrong comment.

[Tree House Academy]

*sigh* Anything. And I.mean.anything is fair game for criticism and ridicule on this board. Good Grief! Zaichili said she didn't mean it the way it came out and she corrected herself. Surely that is enough.

 

My mother worked in retail her entire life. She was a cashier as a young woman who worked her way up to management of small retail stores. She never went to college, never did anything I would consider grand or exciting, but she was a hard worker and it showed. My mom is uber friendly - to a fault. She can be so annoyingly chipper that one might want to puke. Her biggest setback was the customers. It wasn't ALL customers, but there were those *ones* that could just ruin her day in an instant. Christmas was the worst. As my mom aged, I saw her bubbly personality fade and she became very grumpy. She hated going to work each day. She was laid off two years ago and found a different line of work after that. All this to say that customers sure can be rude and pushy - and cashiers often take the brunt of it - especially when there is no manager in sight.

 

I remember standing in line at a pharmacy one day last spring and hearing a woman be so rude to the casher that the cashier was CRYING as she rang up the woman's items. I couldn't let it go and I went over and said something to the rude customer. Poor cashier. She is still working there, though, and is still one of the sweetest little girls. :)

[Tree House Academy]

I'm in a rush so I'm committing the cardinal sin of not reading the entire thread, only the initial post. Yes, I think you're being a big sensitive. *Most* people don't really care what kind of groceries you buy, when your baby started sleeping through the night or what school your kids go to. They are just trying to make small talk.

 

I will say this-once when my hubby was deployed I started my period in the middle of the night, while I had a terrible cold. I had to drag all of my kids out of bed and go to WalMart (which, I hate on a good day) while we were all in our pajamas. I bought: tampons, midol, cold medicine, chocolate and soda. The young, male cashier wouldn't even look at me. I think he was in fear of his life if he made the wrong comment.

 

As well he likely should have been! :lol:

[fivetails]

...

Edited September 6, 2009 by fivetails
Kittens!

[zaichiki]

I'm also willing to admit that I have a bit of a button when it comes to comments that *seem* to be disparaging toward "lower income" sorts of jobs

 

You know, I NEVER thought about the $$ thing when I made my first post. Honestly, though, it DID occur to me that, where *I* live, a LOT of the supermarket cashiers (as that is the type of cashier I believe the OP was discussing) are mentally-challenged young adults or ladies (usually ladies) who don't seem to know any better socially. So, if you're going to be offended, please don't be offended by the idea that I might have been referring to a low income job, but that I was referring to people who might not be as intelligent or as socially aware.

 

But, of course, I certainly did not mean ALL cashiers. I try to assume that the type that make those inappropriate comments do so because they "just don't know any better." It just seems like, around here, many of the cashiers would fit that description. Sigh.

[Irene Lynn]

Zaichiki, all I can say is that we must shop at the same stores. :) I have had great cashiers and very inappropriate cashiers. The ones who have made the most inappropriate comments don't seem to have any understanding that it was out of place. In fact some of them (and I am thinking of actual comments from actual people. I am not making broad sweeping comments.) have gone on and on when someone politely tries to give them hints to stop. One time, while shopping very late at night, a conversation took place between my cashier and the one in the next aisle. It was so bad and inappropriate, (and my cashier kept her calm and tried to get the other girl to hush herself.) that it bonded us together. When I saw that same cashier on future shopping trips we would often talk, because I had been there for THAT event. Oh, my. The poor girl who kept talking had NO clue. She really thought she was being nice, I think.

[ConnieB]

Maybe it's their unsocialized attempt at making conversation with a stranger.

At least that's what I would think.

 

 

 

Hmmmm.....did this young lady go to public school, because if so, we all KNOW that it can't be that she's not socialized. THe public schools care wayyyyy too much about socialization to allow that.

 

Therefore, this young lady must have been homeschooled. Right?

 

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm

 

I typically engage my own children in conversation so that the clerk can just get done quickly.....nothing makes me want to throttle a clerk more than the chatty ones that can't scan the bar codes and talk at the same time. I love self-check registers, lol.

[ConnieB]

I guess I don't mind this. I find it kind of nice, actually. Just today I was checking out when the clerk asked what I do with that many eggs. I told him and he shared a recipe with me. One of the many things I love about living in a small town! Conversation!! I don't find it too informal or nosey, just a way to make polite conversation.

 

Conversation I don't mind....but most of the time (and I guess it's not just me because this thread is full of them) the clerk wants to complain about her boss, her love life, her landlord, her kids. Uggg. I don't want to listen to this from my neighbor, why would I want to listen to it from her?

 

Recipes.....specials on a different brand of something I bought.....where to find coupons.....those are the proper conversations for a check out line SO LONG AS the clerk can keep scanning and talk as well, lol.

 

I miss living in the small town where the cashiers were all people you saw outside the store as well, so you actually COULD have a real conversation because you knew them. Of course, shopping took much longer then, lol.

[ConnieB]

My dh does the grocery shopping, so I am not purchasing groceries often and when I do I am usually with him and not alone. Anyway, we receive wonderful service at Sam's. Costco, and Walmart. Cashiers/ managers/ door greeters/ employees at all levels know my dh by name. They chat with us. Some even come over to us while we are shopping.

 

The waiters at the restaurant we frequent all stop by to chat even if we are sitting outside. We have been going there since before our youngest was born. When the little guy was still in their high chairs with wheels, they used to push him around the restaurant.

 

Did I mention that we live in the South and dh is a car salesman?

 

The hair dresser we go to has been cutting the boys' hair since I was pregnant with the youngest. The last time we went in she teased my oldest about girls and his "hunk-a-burnin' love" sideburns and youngest about holding him down and pulling his loose tooth.

 

I am quiet in public (for the South), but I can't imagine living in a place where no one talks to their customers.

Mandy

 

But see, that's NOT the kind of conversations that the others that posted are experiencing. Your conversations are what I miss about small town living. So maybe the problem is big city living!

[babysparkler]

I guess I don't mind this. I find it kind of nice, actually. Just today I was checking out when the clerk asked what I do with that many eggs. I told him and he shared a recipe with me. One of the many things I love about living in a small town! Conversation!! I don't find it too informal or nosey, just a way to make polite conversation.

 

Same here. I use the same grocery store, same time each week, and know all of the cashiers & baggers by name. My usual bagger actually knows my car and offers to push my cart to the car and unload for me each time I am there. They all ask about the kids when I am there alone, and I ask about theirs. I feel like I am a celebrity each time I shop since they all seem so happy to see me each week :lol: and address me by name. I like the small-town-feel even though we are not in a small town.

 

But see, that's NOT the kind of conversations that the others that posted are experiencing.

 

At other stores I find similar "talk" that others are describing, but I just tend to see it as an opportunity to minister God's love to those people and pray for them.

Edited September 6, 2009 by babysparkler

[iluvmy4blessings]

This is a pet peeve of mine also. I am pretty positive that they are told in training not to comment on the contents of someone's basket. Yet they do it anyway! I feel like it is private what I'm buying. I don't appreciate it when someone scans my weight watchers ice cream sandwiches and says "So you're on weight Watchers? How is that going?". I guess this is their way of making conversation. I also had someone once pick up a tube of toothpaste and say "I've never seent his brand before? Do you mind if I smell it?" and then opened the box, opened the tube and smelled it. I thought these weird things only happened to me! :001_smile:

[TXMary2]

Not elitist, Mary. I was responding specifically to the comments that I quoted in that post. Just out of curiosity, did you read that quote? Would YOU, when you were a cashier, have made comments like that? I KNOW I wouldn't have.

 

A long time ago, when I was putting myself through college, I worked at a large-chain bookstore. I did my time as a cashier. I also worked at a petstore (as a cashier). I have found, though, that most cashiers at supermarkets are not the same type you'd find at the bookstore... just sayin'.

 

I'm not being rude. Do you find cashiers where you live to be well-educated and socially aware, on average? This is not the case where I live. I *have* met sweet little ol' lady cashiers, and moms-needing-a-second-job cashiers. Where I live, though, they are NOT the norm in supermarkets. Hey... maybe I just frequent the wrong supermarkets!

 

Anyway... not intenting to be elistist or rude... just sharing my experience related to the TYPE of comments received by the OP.

 

Cheers!

 

 

OK, I am willing to give you the benefit of doubt and I apologize for saying your comment was elitist. When I read it, it rubbed me wrong. Yes, I did see you quoted another post, but no matter what you were quoting I don't think it was necessary to make such a broad statement about what type of people cashier's are. It came across as judgemental and rude.

 

Of course I wouldn't have behaved the way the aforementioned cashier behaved, but I am willing to bet MOST cashier's don't behave that way. I don't like it one someone's ONE experience is used to paint a whole group of people. It is rude. I would think on such a diverse board like this that some people would think twice about what they are posting. On average it takes about 5 minutes to go through a checkout line. Is it really such a big deal for people to be tolerant during that time and listen to a chatty cashier who is probably only trying to be friendly? Maybe the title of this thread fits me and I am the one who is overly sensitive. I am sorry I replied now.

[TXMary2]

THAT is hysterical!

I went to the drug store last week and bought some contraception. I am a married mom of 3. The clerk looked like he was about 16, and he was the only one there (trust me, I was hoping for a female clerk). Obviously, he was uncomfortable. He asked, "Would you like a bag?" I almost laughed. Of COURSE I want a bag to put my contraception in! Or, should I carry it out like a badge, declaring to everyone what I was going to be up to that night with DH?

:lol:

 

 

OK, working at Walmart was rather comical at times. One time a young couple came through the line with condoms, pregnancy test and beer. Needless to say I had a hard time not asking them if they were buying the condoms a little late!

 

Another couple bought high heels, fishnet stockings (yes our Walmart sells those) and beer.

 

:lol:

[Corraleno]

(sorry, duplicate post)

[Corraleno]

ETA: We are a family of 4 and spend about $100 a week and manage to really stock up in the process. Unless you have a large family, how in the world do you spend $200 a WEEK?

 

I only have 2 kids and I routinely spend more than that every week. I shop at Whole Foods and Trader Joe's, and I buy almost everything organic, including meat. We eat a ton of fresh fruit and vegetables and I cook everything from scratch. Vitamins and supplements also add up quickly.

 

Both of my brothers, who had terrible diets full of processed food and junk, were diagnosed with colon cancer in their 40s. One brother had his entire lower intestine removed last year. My other brother died yesterday; he was 49. :(

 

I budget about $1000 per month for food, which may seem extravagant, but we're all slim, fit, healthy, and very rarely sick. Given my family genetics, I'm not willing to take chances with my health, and would much rather cut back on restaurants, vacations, etc. than compromise my diet.

 

Luckily, the cashiers at Whole Foods and Trader Joe's are charming and polite and I've never gotten any rude comments. (Wal-Mart is another story....)

 

Jackie

[Mrs Mungo]

I only have 2 kids and I routinely spend more than that every week. I shop at Whole Foods and Trader Joe's, and I buy almost everything organic, including meat. We eat a ton of fresh fruit and vegetables and I cook everything from scratch. Vitamins and supplements also add up quickly.

 

People also need to keep in mind that prices vary *widely* according to where you live. Butter at my local grocery store is $6.29/pound, milk is around $6/gallon.

 

eta: Ages of kids also makes a big difference. Older, growing kids frequently out-eat adults.

[Renee in NC]

People also need to keep in mind that prices vary *widely* according to where you live. Butter at my local grocery store is $6.29/pound, milk is around $6/gallon.

 

eta: Ages of kids also makes a big difference. Older, growing kids frequently out-eat adults.

 

And even factoring in all that, why does it matter how much a family spends on groceries? I think someone who spends $2000 a month should not be ashamed if that is $2000 they have to spend.

 

I guarantee you that if *I* had $2000 a month to spend on my family of 8, I would do it in a *heartbeat*! We would have organic everything, lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, and meat/poultry from a sustainable farm.

[SquirrellyMama]

If they are not making negative comments, I think it's just chatting with costumers. What on earth is wrong with that? I like to chat with store clerks and others. I like living in a community, and I very much like it when the deli person knows my daughter prefers Baby Swiss over American cheese, for instance.

 

 

I can't even fathom living someplace where people would do all their errands and chores in silence for fear of offending by saying, "Oh, looks like you all love milk" or , 'You sure do have your hands full!" or whatnot.

 

I think you can have conversations without making certain comments. When I worked at HyVee in high school we were told NOT to comment on customers' groceries. I didn't talk to them about their groceries and don't appreicate it when my groceries are commented on. I think I don't like it because of how I was trained at work.

 

I did have a hard time one night when a guy came in and bought strawberries, chocolate sauce, whipped cream and condoms. Man, did I want to comment on that order! :lol:

 

Kelly

Edited September 6, 2009 by kwiech

[txbloobonnet]

Two of my children are cashiers at our local grocery store. I was telling them about this thread and my daughter told me that they are told to ask every customer two things. They are to ask if the customer found every thing all right and they are to also make one other comment on the customers purchase. Well, I can see that would be difficult.

 

First off you have teenagers doing this job (mine are 19 and 16), they are making minimum wage (well, the older one makes a little more). Second they are trying to check fast because they are scored on how quickly each transaction takes (if it is poor they get a good talking to). Then on top of that they have to deal with some rather picky people who come through and are not nice. I've heard all sorts of crazy tales about customers, how ugly they are to the baggers, the evils of cloth bags (if you use them PLEASE wash them occasionally).

 

Anyway...I am just happy when my cashier awknowledges my presence and is friendly. I've even had a bagger break my toe by dropping a can on it...but I know it was an accident. I would not be happy with disrespect and I would report that to the manager.

 

My son is convinced that our society today despises young men. He gets treated far worse than my daughter does by customers and management (a woman). I thought this was an interesting observation.