Is it feasible for my neighbor to homeschool?

[Jean in Newcastle]

Thanks for your post, Jean.

 

Honestly, I'd really just love to help my neighbor if I can. But I have always homeschooled a certain way using certain materials and I know many of those ways won't be feasible for her. That is where I was looking for some advice.

 

Thanks! :)

 

You realize that different materials fit different families - sometimes due to finances, sometimes due to their academic needs. Sounds pretty broad-minded to me;)

[ElizabethB]

Thanks for your post, Jean.

 

Honestly, I'd really just love to help my neighbor if I can. But I have always homeschooled a certain way using certain materials and I know many of those ways won't be feasible for her. That is where I was looking for some advice.

 

And my costs have gone up considerably now that I have three I homeschool ... plus co-op classes. I would venture to say we spend at least $2500/year now on curriculum/classes. Not sure if that makes me more narrow or less narrow! :)

 

Thanks!

 

:grouphug:

 

I spend money for some things, but some of my favorites are for just the cost of printing. You can put together something very good without much money.

 

MEP math, pre-1923 books for spelling, reading, Latin, etc. You do need modern science and history, but you can get those through the library, they generally have good selections in those areas.

 

There is a great thread somewhere about homeschooling for free and cheap. Without a computer, she would need someone to print things out for her, but it is doable.

[Heatherwith4]

You can tell she has a narrow view of homeschooling based on what exactly? How much she spends? How could you possibly know anything about her view of homeschooling based on the small amount of information she's given?

:iagree:

[snipsnsnailsx5]

Moms are always the best teacher for their children! If she loves her kids and wants to homeschool them, she will find a way and meet their needs. I have learned so much educating myself. I dropped out of school and got married/had baby. I have my GED now, but that doesn't make me smarter.

 

I am sure they get a tax check at the end of the year. That is when she would buy the curriculum she needs for the year. That is what I do.

 

She needs a friend that will lovingly help her start on this new adventure. How about going to the library together and finding some great and encouraging homeschool books.

 

BTW, my son is starting 10th grade and does very well. He is doing Chemistry this year and Geometry. I never took Geometry. That is why I love Teaching Textbooks and being a part of a great homeschool group!

 

:iagree:

[HejKatt]

I haven't tried these myself, but hope these can relieve the financial aspect.

 

1. Rent homeschool books

http://www.homeschoolbookrenter.com/main.sc

 

2. This WTM thread on free curriculum:

http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=109114

 

3. Going to a local homeschool support group, and borowing/purchasing used curriculum

 

4. School district giveaways

This one may be a long shot, but I read it in the California Homeschool Network handbook - apparently some school districts give away old textbooks, e.g. when they have a curriculum change. I hadn't heard of this, myself, but I figure it doesn't hurt to ask.

[kalanamak]

Ahhhhhhh, sucked in by a stale post!!

Edited February 25, 2011 by kalanamak

[regentrude]

She proceeded to tell him that she had recently videotaped bullying of her two children going on during school hours on school grounds and she was considering homeschooling again.

 

 

I am puzzled to see that this thread began a year and a half ago and the situation is still the same. Has she, in the meantime, taken any steps to educate herself about homeschooling? Or to get her GED? Or anything constructive to get her kids out of this situation?

If the answer is yes, then maybe she will be able to homeschool her kids.

If, however, the answer is no and she has not been using the time working towards a solution and is still just "pondering", I would honestly be skeptical if she has the will and energy to make it happen.

Bullying is horrible. Seeing my kids bullied for a year and a half without actively doing something about it is unimaginable.

[Miss Sherry]

You can tell she has a narrow view of homeschooling based on what exactly? How much she spends? How could you possibly know anything about her view of homeschooling based on the small amount of information she's given?

It almost ALWAYS strikes me as "narrow" when one parent asks if it is "feasible" if another parent homeschools. I guess I'll go hide now before Jean trys to beat me with a wet noodle or something.

[Jean in Newcastle]

It almost ALWAYS strikes me as "narrow" when one parent asks if it is "feasible" if another parent homeschools. I guess I'll go hide now before Jean trys to beat me with a wet noodle or something.

 

I prefer my noodles dry:D That way I can skewer you:lol:

[Miss Sherry]

I prefer my noodles dry:D That way I can skewer you:lol:

:lol: Oh sheesh, skewer smooher, you couldn't hurt a flea.:lol:

[Ohdanigirl]

I've known people who've learned with their children. They need a structured curriculum but all in all I think it worked. Often how well you do in school has to do with the learning that goes on at home.

 

I know a woman who home schools her son. She got pregnant as a teenager and did not finish school. She works through the books a year ahead, to be sure she gets it all.

 

Maybe she could try after schooling the kids, and then use the summer to really see if it fits. It isn't impossible, but t will require some hard work on her part.

 

Danielle

[mom2myboys]

If you did not know about her educational and financial background, how would you have handled her questions about HSing? Since you are doubting whether she can HS given her challenges, she may be picking up on that feeling even if it is not verbalized. And since many moms can doubt themselves when making the initial decision to HS anyway, she may feel even more doubtful. I know you are just being sensitive to her situation and you truly care and want to help her. Maybe it would be helpful to offer the information and encouragement you would offer to someone whose situation you did not know? Convey confidence in her that she could find a way to HS if it is truly what she wants to do. Many moms HS despite challenges. She could find a way around her challenges if she really wanted to and maybe she needs to hear that. Lack of money and education can make some people feel discouraged. Other people may see them as less capable and they may feel this about themselves. Sometimes just having someone believe in you provides enough confidence to seek solutions to problems you felt powerless to change. Maybe having someone believe she is capable will inspire her to seek alternatives? I hope this makes sense. I am exhausted. You are sweet to care so much. Best of luck to your neighbor.

Edited February 25, 2011 by mom2myboys
nm

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

I'll do it. I'll say the hard thing. Please take what is helpful and disregard the rest. This is not to offend you, and I hope you aren't offended, but this is the voice of experience coming at you just in case this is what you really need to hear:

 

I suggest that you remain friendly and offer a sympathetic ear when you feel like it, but this is really up to her and her only.

 

I speak from experience. I have sympathized and helped and led to water (but couldn't make drink) more moms than I care to remember. I never initiated any of this. It was always someone wanting to talk to me about homeschooling because they were dissatisfied with public school.

 

So I'd listen. And talk. And share. And teach. And give, until it hurt. And then I'd sit incredulous and exhausted when I finally realized that they weren't truly going to homeschool.

 

I gave so much support that the only thing I didn't ever say was, "I'll teach your kids for you."

 

Looking back, I believe that those moms all fell into two categories:

 

1. Those who were waiting for me to offer to teach their kids

2. Those who like to complain but have no intention of making changes that require sacrifice

 

Both types of people wear me out.

 

I won't do it anymore.

 

I won't donate curriculum, set up tea parties to talk about homeschooling, let people observe me homeschooling my own kids, teach people how to use a computer (or a phone, practically), discuss methods or curriculum, or any of it, until I see that Mom with her feet on the path already.

 

If I don't feel like she'll homeschool whether I exist or not, I don't get involved.

 

This sounds horribly cruel but I only have so much energy and I need to keep it focused on homeschooling my own children through an economic recession. I am giving my life for this, and I don't have time to persuade someone else who doesn't really want to do it.

 

She has to do all that legwork to succeed, anyway. A homeschool mom has to research for herself and make decisions. If she can't even begin to learn about homeschooling on her own, she won't be able to actually teach her children on her own.

 

My life is enough of a testimony and reminder that homeschooling is an option. I'm here to teach my kids. I'm not here to be a homeschool ambassador or an advocate for unhappy public school families. Not right now; maybe later.

 

I'd even go so far as to say that a woman who won't even get herself to the library to google 'homeschooling in my state' is not possessing what it takes to teach her own kids at home.

 

Disclaimer: Now, if any parent says to me, "I want to homeschool my children. I've made the decision, they have been pulled from school, but things aren't going the way I thought and I need some help," I will drop everything and help her.

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

I am puzzled to see that this thread began a year and a half ago and the situation is still the same. Has she, in the meantime, taken any steps to educate herself about homeschooling? Or to get her GED? Or anything constructive to get her kids out of this situation?

If the answer is yes, then maybe she will be able to homeschool her kids.

If, however, the answer is no and she has not been using the time working towards a solution and is still just "pondering", I would honestly be skeptical if she has the will and energy to make it happen.

Bullying is horrible. Seeing my kids bullied for a year and a half without actively doing something about it is unimaginable.

 

:iagree:

 

I see people in this thread wanting to give this mom lots and lots of grace because of her low education level and poverty. Do a poll here on the boards and see how many of us began homeschooling with low education levels and poverty.

 

There is a fierce desire and a native intelligence that make it possible for a homeschool mom to overcome that background, and you have it or you don't. Coddling by others doesn't provide either trait.

[snipsnsnailsx5]

:iagree:

 

I see people in this thread wanting to give this mom lots and lots of grace because of her low education level and poverty. Do a poll here on the boards and see how many of us began homeschooling with low education levels and poverty.

 

There is a fierce desire and a native intelligence that make it possible for a homeschool mom to overcome that background, and you have it or you don't. Coddling by others doesn't provide either trait.

 

Also :iagree:

 

I will say that I could have been like that mom. I'm just in the first year of pulling all of my kids out of public school. However, I do have a high school diploma, and two or three college classes under my belt from after I graduated. However I was a very young single mom and didn't have time to go further with my education after I graduated high school.

 

Also, my family now could be considered very low poverty with our family size ....enough to qualify for free medical for my kids and food stamps.

 

Yet, I knew what had to be done last year and we just did it. We save for curriculum and find ways to do it cheaper. We use tax returns, and even student loans to help us live and educate our children too. I have gone back to college at the same time I'm learning to homeschool my children. I'm about half-way through getting my Associates already. I felt it was important, especially with a middle-school aged child, that I really get back into the learning mode and refresh my math and English skills. Math, especially, I really have struggled with (but still managed an A in my first math class! wohoo LOL).

 

Anyway, my point is that if this mom REALLY was concerned then she'd find a way...she'd try harder. More then likely though, she's just going along with conversation, saying what she knows you'd want to hear. I've seen this before already in my short time homeschooling. Twice I've talked to friends who've admired me for homeschooling, then gone on to complain about public schools and how they really wish they could homeschool, but they just can't. In my head I'm thinking, "why can't you?". Really, I know that its mostly about the conversation and wanting to add something to it...deep down they REALLY aren't that concerned about the PS or wanting to homeschool.

[seewah]

Thank you all so much for your thoughts and wisdom. I truly appreciate it. Every single one of you have given me much to think about as I prepare to speak with my neighbor about homeschooling. My head has been nodding up and down in agreement as I read through your thoughts this afternoon.

 

Again, thank you.

[dakarimom5]

I'll do it. I'll say the hard thing. Please take what is helpful and disregard the rest. This is not to offend you, and I hope you aren't offended, but this is the voice of experience coming at you just in case this is what you really need to hear:

 

I suggest that you remain friendly and offer a sympathetic ear when you feel like it, but this is really up to her and her only.

 

I speak from experience. I have sympathized and helped and led to water (but couldn't make drink) more moms than I care to remember. I never initiated any of this. It was always someone wanting to talk to me about homeschooling because they were dissatisfied with public school.

 

So I'd listen. And talk. And share. And teach. And give, until it hurt. And then I'd sit incredulous and exhausted when I finally realized that they weren't truly going to homeschool.

 

I gave so much support that the only thing I didn't ever say was, "I'll teach your kids for you."

 

Looking back, I believe that those moms all fell into two categories:

 

1. Those who were waiting for me to offer to teach their kids

2. Those who like to complain but have no intention of making changes that require sacrifice

 

Both types of people wear me out.

 

I won't do it anymore.

 

I won't donate curriculum, set up tea parties to talk about homeschooling, let people observe me homeschooling my own kids, teach people how to use a computer (or a phone, practically), discuss methods or curriculum, or any of it, until I see that Mom with her feet on the path already.

 

If I don't feel like she'll homeschool whether I exist or not, I don't get involved.

 

This sounds horribly cruel but I only have so much energy and I need to keep it focused on homeschooling my own children through an economic recession. I am giving my life for this, and I don't have time to persuade someone else who doesn't really want to do it.

 

She has to do all that legwork to succeed, anyway. A homeschool mom has to research for herself and make decisions. If she can't even begin to learn about homeschooling on her own, she won't be able to actually teach her children on her own.

 

My life is enough of a testimony and reminder that homeschooling is an option. I'm here to teach my kids. I'm not here to be a homeschool ambassador or an advocate for unhappy public school families. Not right now; maybe later.

 

I'd even go so far as to say that a woman who won't even get herself to the library to google 'homeschooling in my state' is not possessing what it takes to teach her own kids at home.

 

Disclaimer: Now, if any parent says to me, "I want to homeschool my children. I've made the decision, they have been pulled from school, but things aren't going the way I thought and I need some help," I will drop everything and help her.

 

:iagree: This has got to be, by far, one of the best replies I have ever read on this forum. I could not speak with such eloquence if I tried. I was nodding my head through the whole thing because I was trying to post this same thing earlier. Thank you!:grouphug: