I'm sorry how all this is playing out. I'm still praying for you.

My kids have not even been interested in sororities or frats, so I have dodged this bullet so far. I have to say, this is sickening. This is not just Penn State, although the name Penn State is now synonymous with cover ups and immoral behavior, these are our young people. These people are on the east coast, Brock Turner was on the west coast. Is this the new upper class cultural norm???? If so, I would be ashamed for my kids to join in. I couldn't stop my kids if they wanted to, though. I'm grateful that so far my older children contribute more to society than they take. These kids are leaches.

I agree that the county extension agent needs to know. If they are unhelpful I would still contact the Master Gardener's guild in your area, because that is worrisome!

During school hours they often take off their shirts for PE and Agricultural classes that are outside in the hot sun. They don't do it inside the school itself, other than they gym, but girls who go around outside during school hours with only tank tops risk getting "dress coded" if they are busty. I am surprised that most schools don't offer welding???? I thought that was very standard.

No tank tops are supposedly allowed for girls, but only girls with visible cleavage are getting "dress coded".

The main rules that she is protesting are the ones applied to cleavage which are only applied to "busty" girls. She feels that since boys can walk around without shirts at all it is wrong that on hot days some girls can't wear a tank top outside in the sun. The whole dress code is evidently more strict than any other school district in NorCal, but again, I can't find it online and we signed a copy of the parent handbook, but I have no clue where that is because we did extensive remodeling this winter. Not only is the dress code not online at this time, which it should be, but the copies of her protest arguments were taken down from classrooms last night after the school was closed. Only someone with a key could have done it. The janitor and the principal both claim they did not do so...but the flyers that teachers placed in their own classrooms are gone.

Absolutely. I only suggested it because it sounds like they want to move into a house after six months, so it seemed easier than a six month lease. The situation works for my friend because the Portland Oregon area is pretty temperate. I would not suggest doing so in the winter. I have another friend whose family tent camped for four months one summer to afford a down payment on a house in the fall. They did that in Ashland Oregon, not too cold from May to Sept, and they had a lot of fun doing it, but they were a really fun family who could make the best out of any situation. I would never suggest anyone do that, lol.

For the amount of rent you are thinking of paying I would look into purchasing a trailer and parking it somewhere quiet. The weather should be decent for the next six months and then you could move right into the perfect house. A bi-polar person might be happier in a trailer parked in a natural setting anyway. I have a very introvert former coworker who lives in an Airstream very happily. It is parked at the edge of a large park by a lake and he pretends he has no neighbors. Works very well for him. Cheaper than an apartment, much more private, and plenty of breathing room outdoors. When his grandkids come visit they pitch a tent in the next space over.

Honestly, am I reading this right??? Not only did he not ask you but you are expected to drive him? The driving him thing is WAY over the top. I would NEVER presume that someone must drive anyone else a single block, and three hours is nuts. If your ex wants to come, WTH can't he drive himself? And for your brother to say you need to get over it???? I might skip the whole event at that point if it were not about the actual girls being your Godchildren.

I think lots of families used to be like this and it is just less common now. My kids prefer each other to anyone else and they have a good age spread. I could see them being like this to the point of excluding others if they lived closer together. My youngest is planning to move to be near the other two when she graduates and they will probably be glued to each other.

Intriguingly enough the dress code for the school district (it is district wide) is not up on their website right now when I went to see if I could copy and paste it. Interesting...

The time was not punitive, fortunately her school is pretty intellectual and the principal and vice principal took time from their day to talk to her for that hour. She told them that the dress code is very different from other schools (they said they didn't make the dress code, the school board did) and she said it wasn't fair how it was often applied by teachers on different days, giving examples. Both of them agreed that if her examples happened the way she remembers them that they were not fair.

I don't have suggestions, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. That really, really sounds like a lot. I would consider trying to find other ways to motivate the teens to eliminate the stress over them. That really is not cool. My own teen can be a PITA, as much as I love her and believe she is developing into an amazing person. I have learned that she needs to do her part of any bargain FIRST with no fussing before I do my part. Hopefully you can figure out what motivates them and get them to do what they need to do with less stress.

I am a link dork, I will see if I can link to it tomorrow, but it will take me a long time, lol.

She loves welding, lol.

She protested her Totally Draconian Dress Code because she feels it penalizes girls for being feminine and puts all responsibility for bad behavior of boys on the girls. She did the whole protest by herself and printed up and taped memes that summarize her feelings all over the school. One teacher (probably the best English teacher in the North State) supported her and taped up her flyers in his classroom. She spent an hour in the principal's office (missing her welding class) and was invited to do a presentation of her beliefs for the school board next month. While I think there are bigger issues in the world, I am concerned about the rise of patriarchy in modern culture and I know this is the part that affects her the most right now. I think she will have bigger issues with patriarchy in the future, but I am not sorry she is combating the little piece she can. I remember when I was first considering enrolling her and the school was so happy to have her lovely test scores. I wonder if they think it's worth it now...

I would think that a responsible person would be a delight to a seasonal employer! I think you could be picky and choose something you think would be fun. You have been under a lot of stress and many seasonal jobs in the hospitality industry are quite fun!

I do think bullying is up, across the board. Not just with moms but with other people. I hear stories from lots of people who are stunned with rude personal interactions all over the place.

I do think the third scenario sounds abusive, but I don't think the police would be able to do anything about it. Public humiliation is very fun for abusers and they are super good at not crossing the line of illegal in public, while reducing the person they are with to nothing. They do it get make the other person feel like no one will help them. And when the abuser gets really ugly, the abused is too discouraged to call for help.

If it can't be sterilized, I'd throw it away. I am a sterilizing weirdo, though.

This is so disturbing to me that so many college students are doing this. Most of the people who want me to pay them for shifts they didn't work are marginal people on the fringe of society I was trying to give a chance to. I am really wowed by this.

Sadly, as an employer I am shocked at how many people want to be PAID for shifts they didn't work but were scheduled for. They never get it. Honestly, they may not learn a lesson at all.

Still praying here!

Also, to make smoothies more fun, smoothie bowls are full of texture and the combos are endless.

I spend years growing my hair long but eventually give in and cut it. My hair looks better short. It is thick and curly and with a good cut looks great short. But when it's long I can keep it in a ponytail under a hat and it's better for food service. When it's short the short hairs escape and can end up in food without super diligence and a lot of hairspray. I will probably get my hair cut short by August this year because it is cooler and looks better, but right now It is much easier to just put in a ponytail, and it does look nice when I have time to fix it.