Was it specified how they would be mailed? Media rate can take several weeks. I agree that sellers should be checking their email/PM a bit more frequently when conducting "business", but the reality is that some people don't log on every day. And if her only means is through this forum, well, not everyone is obsessive about checking this forum (though I can't imagine, lol). The good news is that you still have time.....May 25 to June 8 (today) is only 15 days.....you have up to 45 days to make a claim at Paypal. I know that's not a lot of comfort when you're worried that you've been ripped off, but if she has all positive ratings (and hopefully that's several ratings, not just one or two), then I would try to be patient. As for feedback....I would definitely point out the lack of communication. Let her post a reply that she went out of town, or had a sick kid or whatever her reason may be. As a buyer I like to have all the information possible to make a decision. Knowing that she's got a hectic life won't detract from me, but will make me feel less anxious when I try to contact her. I find the seller's response to negatives much more telling than the negative itself. Those that calmly apologize or provide their side of the story even when it's not my ideal are much more likely to get my business than the seller who rails against the negative. I can't tell you how many auctions on ebay I have passed up because the very few negatives vs. thousands of positives has been so volatile. Not sure how the ratings work on this board, but if there is a nuetral like on ebay, I'd probably leave that if the only problem ends up being slow or lack of communication. That of course, means you'll have received your item. You might also want to check the postage date and be sure it was given to the post office in a timely manner (for me that's two to three post office days after payment cleared max). :grouphug: I hope your package arrives safely this week!

My guess....he is feeling your stress and unsure how to react to it....and so it's keeping him up at night worrying, and again, unsure how to react, he wants you near. We adults often think we can hide the stress of unemployment or illness marital problem, or whatever other serious issues from the kids, but they always seem to know "something" is wrong. Personally, I think it's the unknown that worries them the most. My parents ALWAYS kept us kids in the dark about everything.....from Dad's unemployment to all the other financial woes, relatives marital problems, illnesses, etc. I chose to go the other way because I remember many a night my sister and I talking long into the night about what caused my mom to burst into tears or why Dad yelled at everyone about something that normally wouldn't bother him so much, etc etc.....and of course our imagination was almost always worse than reality! So...we are pretty open with our kids about what's happening. Obviously we work to keep it age appropriate...but when Dad has been laid off, we told them that money was going to be tight, but that we would be fine for many months because we'd been good about saving money. And that if Dad didn't find something suitable soon, that he'd take a temporary job making less money and Mom would get a part job to help out too, etc etc. The kids actually pitched in to help....saving money became a game to us all. With only a few reminders, trips to the grocery weren't filled with "can we gets" and instead was "mom, wait if you get red apples instead of green we'll save .20 a pound....even though we love red better". There have also been phases in each of my children's lives that they have come crawling in bed with us for a few nights in a row. I allow them to stay and cuddle as long as they need to....or until I fall asleep and wake to find they wandered back to their bed (or didn't). Yes, it isn't ideal and cuts out "fun" for a few nights until we're sure they're over it....but the old way of giving them a hug and 5 minute cuddle made it go on nightly for weeks. Try talking with your son during the day....try to find out if anything is worrying him. He obviously knows that Dad is laid off, maybe he's read/heard the news about the bad economy and that unemployment is very high, homes are being foreclosed, etc....and he equates the two as equals. Maybe he'll not be able to put into words what is bothering him, because he's either not sure himself (normal) or afraid to say it and worry you (a normal kid's warped sense, if I don't mention it mom won't know and worry...when of course, mom already knows). If all else fails...let him sleep in your room....if not in bed with you, then set up a nice comfy place on the floor for him if he comes to you after you tuck him in his bed. Don't make a big deal out of it, in case some of his need is extra attention....just open up the blanket and let him crawl in, or get up and get his own pillow to put at the blanket on the floor. Eventually he may even just crawl in to bed without waking you, or end up on the floor when you awake in the morning. Remember "this too shall pass". I don't hear about teens that still wake their parents in the middle of the night unable to sleep.....they wake you up coming in too late maybe, but not for need of cuddles before they can drift off. Same as the late potty trainer.....don't know any of those that made it to junior high, lol. :grouphug:

I really and truly think this is some childhood ritual that almost all of us have done, and then as parents have to endure, lol. One good thing....you said that you are moving soon, so that will automatically eliminate this friendship. Sad, of course, but since you said there were other questionable incidents, at least this won't be an ongoing problem into their teenage years (scary thought eh?) Take your daughter to a good hair stylist and they will figure out some way to make her look presentable again. And the good news....hair grows out fast. Yeah, I reminded myself of that DAILY when my DD cut her bangs at the scalp line. Cow licks belong at the back of the head not the forehead. It felt like it took forever to grow back long enough to lay down and not stick straight up, but in later years looking back at various photos it wasn't even 6 months. But what a long 6 months it was! :grouphug:

It is MUCH worse than Star Wars. Based on your feelings, I would suggest that you either try to talk the other parents out of Halo 3 (yeah, I know, good luck on that one), or tell your son you're sorry but he can't go to the party. I would NOT put him in the position of going knowing that he will then have to resist not only peer pressure to play but his own temptations. He will either have an absolutely horrendous struggle on his hands to resist...or he'll give and defy you and then have to deal with the consequences of both his betrayal and the viewing of this game. I don't care how good of a kid he is, this is not a position I would want to put anyone in. Google Halo 3 and you can view some screen shots and read more about the game. You'll see that this is not even close to Star Wars. I know your son will be disappointed, perhaps even angry at you, but these are the types of hard decisions that every parent has to make. Perhaps you can arrange something fun for your family to do so that he will not just sit home and mope, and then in a couple weeks invite these same friends to your house for a more age appropriate party. Perhaps if these other boys realized that they can have fun without having to witness such violence they will be more open to parties without it. :grouphug: to you for having to make the tough choices for your son.

At least he didn't say Duck Tape!

I would add to that list....that you'll be ok if the money is not ever repaid. This is a common suggestion by the "experts" when you're lending money to family & friends....because if you won't be ok with it never being repaid, it WILL sour your relationship with that friend. Frankly, I wouldn't lend it mostly because it seems that she's dodging the question of why she needs the money. Of course, it may be a language/cultural barrier, but whenever I've asked, or been asked, to borrow money it always starts out with the story of why. The fact that she cut the amount needed in half but still gave no explanation also makes me feel that something is too odd. And probably even more on my "red light going off" is that it sounds like you are very casual friends. I would never imagine asking for money from casual friends. Which means that you should be the last resort, so has she already asked and been turned down by family and close friends.....so is the money going for something that no one approves of? I would probably write back and tell her that you don't have money to lend, but if she wants to discuss what the problem is, you might be able to help her find a solution. As you said, maybe she needs a place to stay and you can help her find a temporary situation....if it's a bill that needs to be paid, perhaps a call to the creditor will get an extension to pay and help finding a part time job will get the money before the extension. Would love to hear how this one turns out as my curiosity is aroused lol.

:grouphug::grouphug:

Ok...probably not totally appropriate, but one that I remember from somewhere deep in my past.... If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie

Tell him that you will hold on to the item until he adds her address to his paypal, and has it confirmed. If he's willing to put up a bank account the confirmation will take 1 or 2 business days (meaning mid-week since tomorrow is a bank holiday). If he's not willing to put a bank account up then he has to wait for something to be mailed from Paypal to his sister's address, open it and get the code to verify that address thus making it "confirmed". Obviously, not something he may want to do if it's supposed to be a gift. If you mail to a non-confirmed then you WILL lose if he contests it, even though you have emails showing that he requested it. If he's not willing to do the address confirmation, then I absolutely wouldn't do it....first and foremost because of the lost protection, but also think about....if his sister is in the same town, then what's the big deal about it being mailed to him and he delivers it. Might feel different about that if she was far away as he'd have to wait for your delivery then turn around and reship it....but if she's in the same town, he can hand deliver it, so it really loses all the importance of HAVING to be delivered to her house. Nope....confirm it through a bank account as you only mail it to confirmed addresses. He can remove the bank account at a later date if he's worried about hacking or whatever. Also, be sure that all correspondance between you goes through the ebay mail system...meaning log in and send your mail through their system. They use that mail as part of any disputes....and he may just delay this thing long enough to complain that you aren't shipping. I agree that transactions are becoming more complicated...and I think it's because even the normally honest folk are either scared you're trying to rip them off, or they're angling to do it to you. Didn't use to be so hard to tell the difference. :confused:

But they're weren't "of the United States" because the US had not yet been formed. I don't remember them being called President either, but that could just be poor memory because I can't recall what they were called either. But they were the leaders....and they served very short periods and were replaced by committee when they grew upset with the leaders ideas......something that would be quite interesting today, because we'd be changing leaders on a weekly basis, lol.

I'd start letting her know you were busy.....after all you are. Sorry, I can't get together with you this week, son is now a teen and you know how much more time their schooling/extras take.....maybe next week. I know you want to feel guilt about pushing her away, but honestly, you need to do what is right for your family....and a teen boy does not even want to know that his mom and friends have "tea" let alone all those details. And obviously it's not doing you any good either. There are many books that have been recommended by the hive over the years about "toxic inlaws"....and while she's not an inlaw, the fact is that some relationships can be quite toxic to the rest of your life, and need to either be changed or eliminated. You are NOT this woman's keeper, you are NOT responsible for her pains in life and you are NOT the one that can solve any of it for her anyway. MOST people will start to take the hint when week after week you are too busy for more than a 5 minute call ("I really have to go now because Son/DH needs me...I have to start dinner...I have to get to this or that appointment"), texts go ignored, and requests to get together are put off until next week. If she doesn't take the hint than you will need to be less subtle. In the one case I've had where hints didn't work, and veiled truth didn't either, my DH (bless that man!!) finally took a call from her and said that he would prefer she not call me for a while, that the relationship was too stressful for me. I felt awful that he was a bit blunt, but she never called me again. She is an adult who has chosen this lifestyle for herself...you are not required to participate. Sadly, many women go from one abusive relationship to another....and there is seldom much a friend can do to stop the cycle, unless they are willing to get extremely involved in her life. And I don't recommend that at all. Realize also, that in many ways she is abusing you....and waiting and expecting you to abuse her back. It's part of the cycle. If she has ever sought therapy you might contact her doctors and let them know of the situation to see if they will intervene....but most likely she's going to have to hit rock bottom before help works.

Grocery prices vary so much town to town (and for that matter the same company in two locations!).....so no one is going to be able to give you an accurate answer except someone who lives in your own town...or you. I would suggest checking to see if your library has a series of books called Tightwad Gazette. I can't say I agree with all her methods....I'll never wash zip lock bags with soap and water and air dry them, lol.....but there are many things she does that definitely helped me understand how and where to save money. The single biggest.....the price book. She goes into much better detail, but basically you will need to a bit of leg work to get it started...shopping all the grocery stores in your driving area and literally writing down the prices on a long list of the things you regularly purchase. This becomes your base price list.....it will also help you see where the MOST low prices are in your area. No one store will be the lowest in everything, but you're looking for the most low prices on the stuff you use the most. In other words, it's not worth driving to another store to save .20 but it might be worth a weekly drive to the other side of town if the majority of the items you buy are each .20 less. Some other ideas off the top of my head: Plan! Plan your menus for a week in advance so that you know what you need at the store and aren't just buying whatever you see that looks cheap or yummy and then trying to make it all work into a menu. We go through our store ads to see what is on sale (and that price book helps us know if it's REALLY a sale or not)....and make up our menu on what's on sale, or what's in the freezer already (which we bought multiple of when it was on a real sale). Do your shopping once a week. Period. And always with a list. Milk, fresh fruit, etc will all last a week, so no need to shop every couple of days. In fact, if you can go every other week, even better. The more often you go in the store, the more you will spend on things you "think" you need, or you want....or that you think are a good deal but maybe aren't, etc. If your children are distracting when you shop, see if you can swap an hour or two of child care with a friend so you each can do your shopping alone. I was blessed with my first two kids being wonderful in the shopping cart.....the third kid would scream from produce to check out, lol. Distractions cost you money because you get to the point where you just grab off the shelf and run to check out. Cook at home almost exclusively! This must be the absolute biggest money saver for my family. In fact, tonight's dinner was a knock off of Chipotle restaurant's chicken bowls. I fed all of us for less than I could have bought my husband and I each a bowl....and we have leftovers enough for everyone for tomorrow's lunch. There are literally millions of recipes availble online to "copycat" nearly every favorite restaurant. If you don't know how to cook, see about cooking lessons at your community college, or ask a friend to teach you. It's truly not hard once you start to understand the hows and whys. My husband takes a lunch to work every day....I can feed him all week for what one or two lunches out would cost....not to mention the healthier foods I pack. And it's more food so he's not coming home starving and snacking while I finish fixing dinner. Sometimes he gets sandwiches, sometimes he gets leftovers. Always fruit or a salad (or both)....and we bake cookies or brownies or some treat for a dessert. Sodas out of the vending machine are $1....we buy the generic brand for about .20....so I spend less on his soda in a week than he would one day out of the machine. He has cut down to just one soda a day by taking along a water bottle and flavor packets so even that has become healthier (and cheaper). He has a box of flavors in his desk if he gets thirstier than I packed, etc. We invested in a high quality water bottle (no BPA, etc) and an insulated lunch bag. Plan your meals with more veggies and less meat if possible. Most people "hate" veggies because they over cook them, or just boil them or something else unappetizing. It's amazing how many of our friends' children will eat veggies at my house but not at home, lol. Yes, we experimented (and still do) with new cooking methods, recipes, spices, even new-to-us veggies and some were flops....but the winners more than make up for the flops, in both health and financial ways. Saving money isn't always the fastest method....but it's healthier, cheaper, and more satisfying than the alternative. When was the last time your family finished a take out meal and exclaimed it to be delicious and were putting dibs on leftovers before they were even packed in the fridge? I get that several times a week. And I don't consider myself a great cook....just a fearless one, lol.

I voted Internet. I don't do well when it's down, lol. But...take my answer with a grain of salt....I often say that I have drank (drunk?) less coffee in my entire life than my husband does in a single day. They could stop manufacturing coffee and I'd only know it when my husband keels over, lol. Now....make me choose between chocolate and Internet....well, that's just mean and cruel. But Internet would probably still win out because I would simply go online and order some!:grouphug:

Hey be nice...I haven't seen a 4 at the beginning of my age in a long time! Happy birthday!

Could you send some of it here to Arizona, please. Pretty Please.

Looking for something comparable in coverage to Apologia's high school texts (General/Physical/Biology/Chemistry/Physics) but more secular. Links would be great, titles fine too, lol. Thank you.

Looking for something comparable in coverage to Apologia's high school texts (General/Physical/Biology/Chemistry/Physics) but more secular. Links would be great, titles fine too, lol. Thank you.

I'm not sure I understand? If she's selling, then doesn't she really have all the control? She'd get payment and be sure it clears before sending the product so the risk is really the buyer who has to send the money first? Even if it is a dealer buying, they'll still have to pay her first, and if she waits for the check to clear, or uses Paypal and follows their rules about sending only to verified addresses and with proof of delivery, what is her risk?

But would there have been a different outcome if you had been on the sidelines supervising? Were the boys roughhousing instead of just playing a normal game of basketball? And if this is something that has been going on for a while....and you were teaching a class, then perhaps the powers that be should have taken responsibility for either putting a stop to the game playing without supervision, OR have gotten some supervisors. Turning a blind eye to the games all this time does not mean it's suddenly YOUR fault because your son got injured...they legally do have a responsibility because the game was on their property and since it's been going on for a while, they could be seen as having given their approval by not stopping it. I know you don't plan to sue....and the fear that you would is likely what caused their overreaction, but they're not blameless. If there was nothing wrong with the boys playing unsupervised last week/month, why suddenly is it YOUR fault they weren't supervised. What about the other boys' parents....were they teaching a class? If not, they should have been supervising, or at the very least have taken some responsibility now instead of it being all YOUR fault. Sheesh....Sorry...it just annoys me to no end when people make these types of judgments. Sadly, now the outcome will probably be that no one is ever allowed to play basketball unsupervised at the church, when the fact is that the accident probably would have happened had every one of those parents been standing there too. Supervising does NOT guarantee that children don't get hurt. Boys fall when playing basketball....most don't even get a scrape, some get minor scraps and others break their teeth.....some even die from head injuries in a room that was FULL of adults. Does this mean no boys should ever play basketball...supervised or unsupervised? Of course not. I hope that your son's teeth repairs go well....my DH has two false front teeth from being kicked in the mouth during soccer as a youth....he had repairs done several times over the many years since and about 3 years ago opted to do the implants so he didn't have to keep getting the repairs. So far, so good, and they're much stronger than the repairs.....he can bite an apple instead of having to eat them cut up, lol. Minor things in life.

And if they pay by Paypal be sure that you send it only to a confirmed Paypal address AND that you have proof of delivery (although Paypal typically only requires the delivery confirmation, I'd probably spend the extra buck to require signature, but honestly, I'd do that on all sales not just low posting buyers). That way if they try to dispute the Paypal you have the proof Paypal typically wants for you to win the dispute. If they pay by check I'd wait 10 days at least before shipping (be sure they're aware of that before hand) and I'd actually also contact my bank and be sure that the funds have CLEARED, not just been deposited into my bank account. If they don't clear on the other side (their account) then your bank will remove them from your account. I'd never buy something from someone with such low posts, but selling you have most of the control.

I notice you're in Arizona....any chance this was the B&N at Arrowhead? If so....don't take it personally....their children's department is staffed by people who should never be allowed around children! I hope, whereever it was, that you write a nice polite letter informing the manager why you'll never shop at B&N again, but instead will now do your shopping online at Amazon. He deserves to know. And maybe the book stores in town will finally get the hint....treat your customers like crap and yes, sales will drop to the point where you'll be out of business. Book sellers especially you'd think would treat us like gods...because most of them are on the brink of closing down! I haven't bought a book at a local bookstore in probably 5 or more years.

A lot of us military families ARE military because we want to move around. "See the world" is a familiar refrain, plus a slogan, lol. Nothing wrong with wanting to expand your horizons....so long as you're doing it for better and not to get away from a bad situation or "running" from something. So long as your family is good with it, I say GO FOR IT. I've never ever heard anyone say "I wish I hadn't lived in all those places and learned about all those cultures". But I do hear a lot of people wish they'd left their hometown for more than just a vacation. Now....realize that not all moves are positive for us military families....while I feel I've learned something from every experience...some of the things weren't things I want to learn again, lol. Spain and Italy are wonderful places to live....Seattle, eh, expensive and too much rain for me.....Texas, been there, done that...according to my hsuband the only problem with Texas was there were too many Texans around. He got a bit tired of the hats, boots and drawl......but that's mostly because he hates to wear those kinds of boots, wears only his military hat when required, and is such a quick speaker that a drawl puts him on edge because it's rude to finish sentences for everyone. Those weren't his favorite years, lol....but I loved how much pride everyone had for their state, something I really don't believe I've seen anywhere else. Otherwise, it was just like the other southwest states we've been in....hot, not enough green, and dusty, lol. But the people are a very very friendly. We've been trying for almost a decade to get back to Europe.....my ideal would be Greece, but that's not likely, lol. Being a teacher, seems like the whole world is open to you. Asia was probably our favorite continent....it was our first foreign post, and it was definitely very very different from what we were used to, but it grew on us qiuckly and many of their customs and a lot of their food have stayed with us for all these almost 40 years.

I'd take into consideration her personality.....at age 13 it's important to have (or begin to seriously develop) the habit of finishing what you start (or knowing when it's ok not to, but that's a much more difficult concept). I have a couple of kids that are very self-motivated....I seldom have to stay on them about getting work or chores done. I would have no qualms about telling them that "we've done enough for this school year, let's end it here, we can pick up the Algebra and Science next fall....go have summer fun". But...I have other children that I cannot even go move the laundry from the washer and dryer or they'll completely stop doing their assignment, wander away or pick up a pleasure book ("we were waiting for you mom"). I would never tell them they could call it quits without having finished, lol. Slowly we're gaining some sense of responsibility for finishing, etc.....but we're not there yet and may never be. Of course in their case if they started whining about having to continue with school when their siblings get to start summer fun, I'd remind them of all the time they wasted during the year when siblings were hard at work studying....and that they have to make up those hours now. So....did your teen do a good job focusing on work, show some responsibility for getting her assignments done in a timely manner, and is in general a "finisher"? If so, yeah, I'd probably let her decide if she wants to just get it done now, or have to spend a little time reviewing next fall to be able to pick up where she left. As I said, I have a couple of kids that would think seriously, and quite probably choose to finish now rather than take longer next fall to finish. Even though she has decided to drop Spanish, however, I would make her finish the book....either now or next fall. My reasoning is that at age 13, you can use her one year of Spanish towards her foreign language credits....and having credits in more than one language can be a plus for some colleges. One place I don't "fudge" is with their credits....if she doesn't finish the book and earn a satisfactory grade on the final exam, no credits. It is my way of staying honest but also a way to put the responsibility on them to earn their credits so they can get into the college of their choice, rather than having to "make it up" in community college or by stretching high school another year.

I wouldn't eat them, but I would turn them into a science experiment. Though, even if we couldn't see anything bad under the microscope, eating would still not be ok. Tomatoes canned in a factory where the sealing is a lot more predictable wouldn't be advisable to eat that old, so I definitely would be leary of home canned.

Contact Snapfish.....I haven't used them, but other online photo places will replace damaged photographs. This has happened to me more than once. The postal workers are horrible about things like that...I swear they purposely look for "do not bend" just so they can, lol. (Ok, before the wife of a postal worker gets made, I'm joking...it's Murphy's law obviously, right?).