My goal is not going. 😂

I didn't pick up the "chemtrails" reference at first and was like "ummm..How do I politely break this to kbutton? Lol

They do make bluetooth headphones at many different price ranges. Just google it and you will find many.

As long as they actually make it more difficult! ETA. Realized the weight is crazy high here. I was thinking anything over 5,000 lbs. 26,000 is crazy high and won't cover any of the things that people are frustrated with.

And free parking on public land.

Easily obtained driver's license. It should be harder and you should be held responsible for what you do behind the wheel. My fix for the giant pick-ups is make any vehicle over a certain weight (ie smaller car) get a CDL. You shouldn't be able to drive something like a giant RV or heavy truck and trailer without having the proper knowledge. This allows people who need larger vehicles to still obtain them.

I agree that whackadoodals and Hamas are not representatives of a majority, I also know that they do influence many people (even if a small percentage) and those people can cause harm and it just sucks to be the person targeted or in the wrong place and the wrong time. You are right that it is not new but like I said, it still sucks.

CAD AND Revit weren't needed to get into an engineering program or to graduate from engineering school but man, lots of EIT jobs require them ir at least want you to be semi skilled in them. One of those strange disconnects between degree requirements and needs in real life. Anyway, I have two students who are interested in learning. One hopefully will have an EE degree in a couple months and one will graduate from high school this spring.

They really should just make that one of the regular options rather than make people write it down under "other".

8filltheheart explained it well. The public universities are a little different than the private LACs like the article mentions. The public universities have more realistic prices to begin with and scholarships can stack but the need based aid is (in my experience) Federal or State and not institutional. Things like Pell Grants or subsidized loans. LACs give a lot more institutional "need based" aid because of their inflated prices but it is based on what they think you can afford and it isn't neccesarily Federal or State aid. Therefore since it is based on what you "need" they just figure you need less if you get a scholarship.

I think the vital misunderstanding is that merit scholarships only apply to full pay students. Yes, it makes it cheaper for full pay students so it is true that no one really pays the full amount or very very few do but the middle class loses need based aid for every dollar of scholarship they get since they no longer "need" it. That right there, took all my kids out of that game since LACs greatly overestimate what I am willing to sacrifice for them. No thank you.

Imagine fighting like hell to keep people homeless rather than simply fighting to make your new schools better but I am not surprised.

I didn't even think about natural disasters. You mentioned renting but in my city rental prices jumped 14% in 2021. Not sure what the 2022 increase was exactly since I don't have an article at my finger tips but I do know it continued to go up. There are people with funds for housing and the homes just don't exist. Private contractors and the city in one place have converted 3 hotels into low income housing. Which tells me tourists are renting homes or private rooms since there is not a shortage of hotel rooms.

Along with all the mentions of Air B&B and geographical shifts, I will say demographics are big. There used to be more under 18's crowded into homes, now there are more singles and seperated parents so the same family needs two homes. Also, many of the older generation have 2 or 3 homes. It is hard to save up to get started in the housing market when so much goes to rent but those already in a home have a steady mortgage. So the inflation isn't hitting them the same and they can save up and purchase another. The renter will be helping with the payment so mostly they need to save up a large enough down to put their mortgage in rental territory with some extra for maintenance. Yes you can get room mates when renting but we all did that too except we had room mates AND cheaper rent. Lastly, homes deterorate. A home owner with margin will provide upkeep on their home and it will stay habitable indefinitly. There is also a percentage of housing moving to the uninhabitable every year though. It could be lack of maintenance on a forclosure, home of someone sick or elderly who can't keep up, or the person who decided to cook meth in their house. Homes that are uncared for will need to be demolished at some point so there needs to be a certain amount of building just to hold steady.

I am so sorry. That sounds so very very difficult.

I originally read this as raging verbally clean, as in not using dirty language and I was like "I wish I could pull that off." Now I find out some people manage to use their rage productivily and now I really wish I could pull that off! Instead I just have old fashioned unfruitful sinful rage. Sigh

Both my high scool children work. They happened to find an employer who practically lets them set their own hours, which is good because sports can really destroy schedules! But they also go out of their way to come in if the employer really needs them. I can see how that would be difficult for employers who use computerized systems especially if you don't tell them before the schedule has been printed. The summer before youngest son started he had regular lawn care jobs which was great.

You may be surprised at how many people feel this way at some point in their life. You are not bonkers. I have went through the motions of life like a robot at times. Sometimes when you survive something difficult or traumatic you are just emotionally dead (exhausted) don't care anymore afterwards. You aren't defective. You are a human. You are allowed to be a person and feel what you feel even if it doesn't feel like you are feeling anything. For me I had to just had to relearn slowly or heal or whatever you call it and I am still changing. I think it is ok to smart small, be easy on yourself. You have to figure out this new stage of life. You and your husband are not the same people you married but that doesn't mean you both don't have positive qualities that you can appreciate. You may just have to get to know this new person you are married to to grow to love him for who he is. I remembering joking when we were invited to a marriage conference that he was lucky he had a wife that didn't make him go to marriage conferences. We joked about giving our best advice so we didn't have to go and mine was "You have to give a damn" . I was implying caring about the other person not just the marriage. I think you are caring which is why you are pursuing this even if you don't feel like putting in a ton of effort. My DH though was much more insightful. "You don't study marriage, you study your partner." Almost all advice he would hear about "what women want" never applied to me. He learned fairly early on I wasn't a "typical woman" whatever that is and when his co-workers would say things like "your wife is going to be mad you didn't xyz" he knew I wouldn't.

It seems like you already know what he is feeling. I don't think amyone wants to feel completely unneeded. Rhetorical question, do you feel he needs you? If you walked away today, where would that leave him? If he walked away where would that leave you? Would you be just as happy? These are just ways to frame "need". Now just because you need someone doesn't mean you have to be helpless. It is good that you are independent except that to be important to someone is to be needed even if it is for companionship. I could completely live without my dog (not all that helpful honestly) but I would be losing something important if she died and would be sad so in a sense I need her. I want to suggest doing something hard together like flipping a house or canoeing the Yukon 🤣🤣🤣 but I don't think that is what you are looking for but honestly there is nothing like a challenge in working together to make yourself a team again. If you have zero interests in common are you at least interested in hearing about each others activities? Just going to have ice cream and telling each other about something important and listening because it is important to the other person is a good start. Can you do something with him, he likes even though you don't and then he can do something with you that you like even if he doesn't like it. That is what we did for family nights. Rotated with each family member choosing something different. It wasn't choosing to do whatever the activity was, for us it was making a dedicated choice to do something together. We were choosing the people over an activity.

I am curious how audiobooks fit into the equation. My youngest listens to tons of literature via audiobook. I just didn't have that option. People may look down on it but the original way of receiving stories was audibly not visually.

My best friend's son and my son's best friend is about 5'4" at 18. I just wanted to tell you he used to call himself "fun size" like the candy bars. It is best to learn to, as my aunt would say, "play the cards your dealt". It probably helps in the self esteem department that he is super athletic. I would definitly point out those things that he himself might think of as positives about himself as encouragement. My 6'4" son was overlooked all the time and didn't have much for friends at all so that certainly isn't the biggest factor in social interactions. ETA: Didn't realize this was a zombie thread. Lol Wonder how tall OP's son is now.

The medical bills are the worst though. I have seen medical bills come 6 months late for a proceedure. You also don't know who all will charge you for a proceedure. Usually you get at least three sometimes more. I had 2 anesthesiologist bills for a family members last proceedure. Sometimes you don't even know who was hired to help a surgeon. It is all so opaque. I don't know how to make a system for such craziness. Things with regular due dates are easy to handle.

I do think there are various cultures even within one region and I am sure Alaska Natives probably have a different perspectives too. I know my wealthier family is the spa and jewelry people but most of us middle class the women run a chain saw or commerical fish or hunt with the guys. Yes, my husband will give me a day off cooking but I also spent many hours chipping tree branches last weekend. I know many women pilots, bow hunters, whatever. I was a construction worker before becoming a SAHM. But my guess is they were also not taught to respect women. I do know some old timers like that but I don't want my husband and sons grouped in with them.

Then I am sorry for your friends and relatives too. That doesn't sound like a healthy dynamic and hopefully the men in your area step up. I realize you are not alone but I also realize that in some families it is reversed. I KNOW those families personally. I gave you an example. There are many men whose wives are busy shopping or going to the spa while they handle everything. Every couple is different. I do carry more of the mental load for our family but a huge part of that occured after I quit working. People who have two incomes should be splitting that more. But I have seen multiple families where zero of that mental load was carried by the woman. Not just mental load. ALL the load, not physical, nothing. Even dealing with kid's schooling or bringing in a paycheck. It simply isn't universal. I do remember early in my marriage my husband asking what I wanted for dinner. I told him I did not want to think or plan and that was it. He was originally trying to do what I want just like I might ask him what he likes at times. Now that he knows what I want (to not think or plan). He plans, shops, cooks without consulting me other then to make sure I wasn't planning on something or going somewhere. I wear out on our long bike rides or mountain climbs so he has just started assuming he will make dinner (unless I already have it in the crock pot) on those days and give me a foot rub to boost. I can't think of any men who don't know how to shop or cook. They probably exist in my circles somewhere and I don't know them enough to be able to say. Even my drunken Dad knew how to shop and cook (though he left a lot of other burdens on my step moms shoulders). My brothers, sons, uncles, friends whom we invite over often bring stuff they made. My husband changed diapers and watched kids but not as much as me because he worked a full time + overtime job. He didn't do everything like I did and yes he could have gotten them to bed earlier when I was gone but he did it his way and life moved on. Part of that might have been he always wanted to be a Dad. My sons know how to cook, clean, do laundry, shop sales, budget. I want to enjoy holidays too so a few days before I ask everyone what they are contributing. Every member, male and female, cooks part of the meal because the deal is everyone contributes.

I am sorry that things are like that for you. It would be very frustrating. Everyone needs help sometime and it sucks when your partner isn't there for you.