I am not Catholic. But I do want to speak to the spouse that constantly makes contempt complaints in the court. My brother did this absolutely constantly to his ex wife. The custody agreement was constantly amended to his whims. She bent, and bent, and bent to try to get him to finally give up and allow her and the kids to live their lives. But my brother is a prick, not mentally ill like your ex, however in action, VERY similar. He did not let up. He just kept finding excuses to go to court and make her life miserable though he was never going to get custody of the kids. He was willing to waste the court's time, and his own money to drain her wallet and make her miserable, and didn't give a crap how that impacted the mental health of his kids. Finally she got mad, hired an absolute shark of an attorney, let it go to trial, and my brother got spanked, spanked hard. The judge blew his top! In the end, he lost ALL say of any kind in any way in the lives of his children. She literally was only obligated to inform of major life events, and school grades/reports. She was nice enough to invite him to their high school graduation parties. I would urge you to consider letting it go to trial because in the long run that short term pain might be a lot better for you and your children.

It is gut wrenching to watch.

We have recently harvested our first broccoli. I have learned a lot! I didn't have the right fertilizer for them, and didn't fertilize enough so the crowns are small maybe 2" at most 3" in diameter. We have finally gotten some heat, which is causing the tomatoes to begin to act like they want to live, and that is causing some, not all, of the crowns to loosen up, and a bud here or there to begin opening. I know if we don't harvest them, they will bolt. So we ate our first garden produced broccoli, a serving a piece. So yummy! I have plans for how to improve the beds for them next year. But I also am going to get them in the ground sooner, and Mark built a frame and covered with heavy dity, clear plastic sheeting for the largest broccoli bed so we can have them in the ground 3 weeks before the end of frost season, and keep them safe. We harvest snow peas just about every other day, usually about five a piece, and eat them on salads. These plants are so beautiful, and they make me very happy. Mark is planning on a bed three times the size of what we have them in now (a raised bed planter with a shelf underneath that is about 28" wide, 24" wide, and 12" deep.) We are going to triple production and have it planted half to snow peas for salads and stir fry, and half to sugar peas for steaming or freezing for winter soups. I have no idea how many we will get from that space. We also harvested our second radish and our first carrot. Now the carrot was not actually ready. I was working in the carrot bed, and found two carrot plants where I had not properly thinned, and so all I was going to get was two, teeny carrots unless I sacrificed one of them. So I gently pulled one. It was this little 1" white/purple carrot, recognizable as a carrot, but we are talking maybe a mm wide. Itty bitty. Mark ate it. His response, "Tastes like a carrot. These things are going to be yummy someday." 😂 I have decided not to pinch anymore blossoms off the cucumber plants. I think they are just big enough now to support fruiting. Hopefully I am not wrong. The celery looks great. Really great. Happy. I consulted my gardening book to see when I can harvest it, and hoped it would be soon. Bwahahahahaha! Nope. End of August, early September for this zone. Hilarious. Mark bought the celery transplants. It was not a crop I had researched at all, and have NOT done a darn thing to baby. My two best crops, the peas and celery, are the two things that had not been on my horizon and I knew less than nothing about! The universe has a rich sense of humor. The bell peppers have finally grown. Phew. The chili peppers never did. And they are blossoming like crazy, but I figure there just is no point in continuing to pinch blossoms of them. Eggplant look great. No signs of blossom, but definitely growing and filling out nicely, finally. Scallions sprouted, and are growing. Not quite tall enough to thin yet, but getting there. I suspect that some of the blossoms on the tomato plants, which have grown a lot recently, will turn into baby tomatoes this week now that heat has arrived. I am going to have a LOT of basil. A ton. Dehydrating it turned out to be crazy. 48 hrs, and it is strawberry season and I need to dry strawberries for the grandboys. So I have decided to harvest as needed, and fill half pint jelly jars (I have about 36 of these things and never use them) with leaves, and stack them in the freezer. Since I cook my own pasta and pizza sauce, I think it will work to thaw leaves and toss them in the pan to wilt just like fresh when I am carmelizing onions and garlic. Have any of you ever done that? What about oregano? I also need to do a harvest of that.

I need a sign just like this! Project for Mark.

We got a little rain last week, enough that they lifted the backyard grilling ban, and ban on mowers and chainsaws because of worrying about sparks. But they are already issuing the ban again. It just wasn't enough, and we are going to have full sun 80-90°F all week long. I am not an AG family. We are just alive gardeners this year, and thankful we have very deep well, and can irrigate our garden without stressing water supplies. We don't have to use a lot of water to do this because we did hugelkulture in the raised beds so the rotting logs and leaves in the bottom really help provide moisture to plant roots. I worry so much about our local farmers, especially those growing food for humans and nor corn for the ethanol plant. I worry about my very favorite farmer. He and his family are so proud of their very diversified, no monsanto, heritage seed farm. They can irrigate some. He has his pumpkin patch and his vegetable field covered in agricultural fabric with drip lines underneath. He has a creek and a pond for irrigation. But neither of those sources are going to remain in stressed causing water rationing unless we get some serious rain soon. His oldest daughter, an absolutely delightful child that I love to talk to, had planted an entire acre all on her own of zinnias, dahlias, peonies, and several other varieties for making bouquets to sell. She saves 75% of what she makes in order to help fund college - at this time in life, she wants to become a botanist. She spends 25%, and often of that, she donates to good causes. She is literally one of the best human beings I know, and gives me hope that Gen Alpha is going to make a major, positive difference in our world. If her flowers become stressed, and she loses her enterprise, I am going to be heartsick. So ya...every good thought I have to our AG families, and please, Mother Nature, produce rain, a substantial but not dangerous amount of rain!

This is an excellent perspective, Carol. Also, to the poster who felt there was nothing that drug mother could really do from California because "homeless druggie", I would like to relate a story from within my own family. I have a niece who has three children by two different men. The younger two are in the sole custody of their father, a not great father but the grandma makes sure they are well cared for, fed, clothed, getting well child check ups, doing their homework, etc. So they are okay. The reason niece had, at the time, only supervised visitation? She is diagnosed bipolar, refuses to take prescribed meds or work with her psychiatrist and therapist, and instead self medicated with alcohol and drugs. At one point she was homeless in SC while the children lived in my area of Michigan. She managed to " woe is me" and lie like a fiend all over social media which ended with gofundme crowd sourcing of a large sum of money for her to buy a car with cash, fill the tank as needed, and come to Michigan to try to kidnap her kids. It is very naive to assume that an unstable person who is homeless cannot get their hands on cash and resources to do something dangerous several states away. This isn't some rare issue. People really do have to worry about this. I know foster parents who have had to ask for foster children to be moved because crazy, out of state, indigent bios have been able to figure out where their kids are, and have engaged in very scary stalking. A lot of people are taken in by any crazy story they see on facebook. They get enraged at the "wrong", and start throwing money at the person posting such stories. They require zero verification of circumstances, of truthfulness of stories, of facts. None.

This. We really should have a uniform federal definition of basic human rights for all. If memory serves, the EU has this, and if so, it would be good to take a look at that. I also feel that we have long ago reached a place where we need to either federally, deliberately confer these rights to minors, or draft a children's bill of rights because what parents are allowed to do to their children in the name of "belief" gets to be pretty appalling. A codified definition of human rights is desperately needed. I mean we have a local group of religious folk who are only allowing a very limited K-6 education for their kids to keep them dependent on the religious community. The kids become adults who are functionally illiterate both in literacy and numeracy. This should be a violation of the children's human rights. One of the big problems we have is that people think they need to horde human rights, that is something that is very finite, a bunch of slips of paper in a hat, and when one group gets a "right", this is like taking one of those slips out of the hat and now there are fewer rights to go around. It is as if they believe if one group has rights, it means it was taken away from someone else, a piece of a pie being eaten up. I have many conversations with folks where this seems to be the view. They don't seem to realize that rights are not consumables.

People who deny this is happening need to watch Shiny Happy People societies on Amazon. This has happened by DESIGN by a cult that has wielded enormous influence in politics, in public policy. This is what happens when religious belief becomes weaponized.

I wish we could like Rosie's posts!

That is really pretty!

Me too. Very vivid images in my noggin that can be hard to expunge.

If memory serves, there is an Arizona school district that banned the Bible from their libraries based on the criteria for the book ban. The O.T. is so laden with sex, genocide, rape, sex, sex, sex, and then well, there is Song of Solomon with all of its very clear descriptions of eroticism, that the Bible did not pass muster. Turn about is fair play.

Right. This right here. I fully expect at some point for a doctor claiming to be Christian to deny me medical service because I am not. I expect this to happen for my son and G. I expect this to happen to our other adult children because they support G so once it comes out they are LGBTQ positive, someone is going to deny them service. I am waiting for our grandson's very Baptist pediatrician - an otherwise very talented physician - to deny him medical care or insist that his hair be cut short and his clothes become "boy like" (whatever the eff that means) in order to be treated. I have wondered what this will eventually mean for the Vanderbilt University Rocket team. Will the women on that team be forced to give up their unisex team designed t-shirts? Will they be required to give up the polos and button downs often worn during presentations since most teams choose a very standard uniform that is neither specifically male or female? I have seen them all at times in black pants, white standard button down collar shirts, and black blazers that look exactly alike, no specific male or female clothing. Very fender neutral. Also very sharp, and businesslike. The women do not wear "feminine" footwear. It isn't practical. What happens to those women when the gender police come for them? People have their heads up their behinds about the far reaching effect of these laws and WHY they exist.

We have a non binary in law/ son's life partner, and now we are afraid to have them come to what was supposed to be our retirement home in Alabama because they have to pass through Tennessee, having a car break down, needing the rest area...we feel like there could be serious danger. G wears gender neutral clothing, yet looks fairly feminine, uses they/them pronouns. I feel like they are at serious risk of someone calling the cops, and said cops beating or killing them. TN has become a tinder box of lunacy. It is only a matter of time before politicians give the full okay to declare open hunting season on the LGBTQ community. We have talked about flying, but everything that is straight through is crazy expensive, and the affordable flights route through Nashville or Atlanta. Atlanta might be okay, though I am not sure what the airport security would be like if someone complained about my two gender neutral/they-them loved ones. But Nashville scares the poop out of me. We have been sickened by all this. If Alabama gets on the Tennessee band wagon, we will have to sell our dream home there. I will bawl all the way to the real estate office. Our daughter and son in law are scared. Our oldest grandson's favorite colors are pink, magenta, and orange. He loves rainbow decorated things. He is 7. It shouldn't be dangerous for a 7 year old to wear a purple shirt with a rainbow over a field of horses - another favorite thing. But, they feel like if Alabama follows TN, they will have to tell him he can't wear his favorite shirts until daddy can get a job up north, and they can move. They love Huntsville. Son in law loves his job. And they love living in our house, known as Shangri La. We wanted to have a winter retreat (mid-Oct - April) from Michigan weather and close to really good hospitals, but not Florida. Northern Bama fit that bill. I am heart broken. I keep hoping that Alabama won't go completely off the rails. But I think that hope is probably going to die.

Friday: We didn't have breakfast but made the usual sacrifices of java beans to the energy gods. Lunch - we made veggie and cheese wraps. I made a homemade Italian dressing for them. Mark ate the first radish from the garden! Dinner - we had baked cod loins, baked potatoes, roast brussels, and steamed broccoli.

We really enjoyed living in Oregon in the early 90's, Newburg area. We ended up following Mark's career which took us back to Michigan, but man, some days I really miss Willamette Valley. Sadly, three of our four adult children, plus our honorary kids are likely to always live in Michigan, Illinois, of Minnesota, and our other child and her family, our grandsons, are in the Huntsville area, so I don't see us ever moving back.

I am so sorry, Dawn!!! Hugs. Is there a restraining order? Can she be be arrested for this? Oh my goodness. She is such a dangerous mind.

You are not wrong. This is the goal.

I am very interested in your Rancho Gordo Bean experience so I hope you will post descriptions.

Beautiful area. We fish at Fletcher's flood waters, kayak on Lake Huron, and enjoy old downtown Alpena. Really nice.

We have been so busy gardening and getting the sailboat ready, that I haven't been reporting daily. But here is an update: A typical day is slay java gods, eat a boiled egg or small amount of oatmeal, maybe a granola bar on their go, then have salads at lunch and we are trying a variety of different salad ideas to keep from being bored, and then we toss fish or large portabellas, or a big chicken thigh to share onto the grill along with veggies or I do a sheet pan of mixed veggies all herbed up into the oven, whichever way works best. Tonight is Mark's birthday meal, and I have some salmon for the grill, veggie and mushroom shishkabobs, and risotto planned. We will splurge and have some ice cream after dinner. Mostly it has been very healthy. We just are outside so much that I have not gotten back into the habit of posting.

Ya. Mark bought one for me, and I did not like the results of my meals at all. So it was drawing dust. I have a lot of other preferred cooking methods. Now Lewis requires entirely homemade food. He cannot handles anything commercial, and fresh/raw is not an option because he cannot digest it. Poor doggie. He has become allergic to so many things. Now I use the instapot every week to make his chicken, rice, green bean, sweet potato, food. When dear dog is gone, the Instapot will go the way of the thrift store. It takes up way too much space for me to never use it again.

Lake Huron? Awesome. You are on my side of the state.

They are wicked. Bottom line. Abandoning a child like that, not giving a fig what happens to him, and then demanding photos/contact from adoptive parents? Totally depraved. Andrew is a pawn in their sadistic games. If grandma was not house bound and had some means of transport, she could have gotten herself to court to find out about her grandchild. She didn't. Bio dad is a whole lot of words I can't say here. I truly think you can 100% cut these people off. You did your best, and they effed it up anyway. They can't be trusted. It is okay. Let yourself off the hook on this. Many many hugs for you, and thank you so much for providing a wonderful home and family for A! Your village thanks for you for loving him and making him your little boy.

This is what happens when people who went to law school make medical decisions instead of the folks who went to med school. He didn't have to take a single doctor at his/her word and then make up an age. He could have said, "I will not re-age her until I see reports from a consensus of a team of doctors from Cleveland Clinic, Mayo, St. Judes, John Hopkins, St. Joseph/U of Mi" etc. Pick any number of really high reputation medical teaching hospitals, and then say when the pediatricians, orthopedists, gynecological, endos, and behavioral pediatric psychs come back and issue their findings, make a determination. Sigh. We see what has been happening all over the U.S. when judges and politicians decide to make medical decisions out an abundance of medical ignorance. I don't really know for sure about the adoptee. Strange things have definitely happened with international adoptions. But I think likely there is a lot of made up crap from these two parents which doesn't lend itself to thinking they are remotely truthful about it at all. I keep going back to just how skeevy and creepy that dad comes off. My instincts tell me there is something seriously wrong with him, and that the wife is an enabler.