I love this. I always forget that outside of our bubble, 4 kids and homeschooling is high on the weirdo chart lol.

This is exactly where I am too. I don't mind a little light romance, especially if it demonstrates healthy relationships. I also remembered she read and loved a dystopian series called Matched. https://www.commonsensemedia.org/book-reviews/matched

Just looked up leviathan and it sounds right up her alley! Thanks, it is reassuring that other wtmers liked it! Most of her irl friends are from much more sheltered homes so she doesn't have too many people to share with.

Also, she's just about to start a new series called Uglies.

My 13yo dd loved the mortality doctrine series that Lori mentioned. Thanks for this thread! Nice to know there's other tween/teen girls who like this genre. ? Does your dd need a penpal? Lol.

We have 4, would have loved more but things don't always go to plan. I find being super positive and owning it helps with strangers. So when they go "? 4!" I reply with "Yes! We're so blessed!" Or they say "wow 4 must be hard" I reply "it's totally worth it! We have lots of fun!" Family is a whoooooooole 'nuther ball game. Best to ignore, have good boundaries, and hope they are decent people who will love the new baby in the family! Congratulations!

Dh's family make kielbasa regularly. His grandparents did, when they emigrated here they kept it up. My FIL feels it's important to keep the tradition, I have some great photos of my children helping. They use cases, and dry them. Lots of salt, garlic, paprika and chilli seems to be the recipe. To be fair, that is the base for most of their recipes ?

I'm also finding it tricky to choose books for my 2nd grader. He was 8 in August, and is only just starting to handle chapter books. Independent reading for him has been: National geographic readers. He loved these. Hey Jack books. Twaddle and easy but it got him over the 'long book' hump. Pirate tales by Terry Deary (this was great because we had read about Sir Francis Drake in history) 3rd grade detectives books. Beast Quest books And yes, magic treehouse. He's a struggle to choose for, if a book is too thick or the pages too lexically dense then he'll find it difficult. Using a kindle so he can make letters bigger helps too. My older two were reading Dahl et al at (younger than) this age and it has been an experience for me to try not to panic...

Yeah, I like that movie but it is super creepy. It's supposed to be. I would not show it to a bunch of 7 year olds. No way. You are reasonable to follow this up.

There are clinics and surgeons in the US doing mastectomies on young teens. The adults of course should have a seat at the table, and their biases should also be noted. The doctors should make evidence based decisions.

The problem(s) with the kids and puberty blockers issue is that the numbers show that the majority desist (many becoming happy gay/lesbian) if they are allowed to go through natal puberty. The numbers also show that a large majority (100% in some clinics!) of kids who go on blockers, go on to cross sex hormone therapy. When we are seeing a 4000% increase in referrals to gender clinics, we owe it to those kids - both the 'true' trans and the dysphoric desistors to be cautious and to have these conversations. Adult transitioners are looking back with the benefit of a brain that has been through it's natural puberty, we have no idea what skipping puberty and trying to induce an opposite sex puberty will have on the brain. None. With all the recent research into brain plasticity, and studies that show post transition suicide rates don't generally improve, throwing the (considerable) resources behind improving therapies for these kids, until they have the brain maturity to be able to consent, seems the wisest course of action. There are also many female detransitioners who speak of a feminist understanding of gender vs sex being instrumental in their recovery. So I think of them and try to kindly continue to ask pertinent questions.

Yeah that's what they're saying. That there's 'very few issues' around having a female body. Hardly worth mentioning really. Especially when you're wanting to fill a Women's Officer role...

Not only what they say about themselves, but what they say about the world, society, women... Case in point - UK labour politicians:

Oh wow. Thanks for everything you gave to the world Mr. Gatto!

And the automatic questions over whether she's a 'real' girl because of some stereotypical boy presentation sounds like reinforcing harmful gender stereotypes to me. (using the feminist definition of gender here - tool to reinforce female subjugation)

Which is also confusing if we're told that gender identity is different to and separate from sex. So why is gender identity necessary at all in the health sector or statistics relating to the sexes (obviously except for during treatment for sex/body dysphoria)? I'm all for people presenting/expressing how they prefer. I'm all for dysphoric people accessing the medical help they need to thrive. I'm not for conflating gender identity and sex, I'm not for just collapsing everything complicated into gender identity is the preeminent feature in humans. I'd love to be persuaded otherwise, I'd love to find none of this concerning.

Yep. Which is why many of us are concerned about things like 4000% increase in referrals to gender clinics - with the biggest spike being dysphoric girls. Which is why we'd like to be really clear and careful about how gender identity is defined, pathologised & portrayed. Because playing at switching 'gender' (again, please define gender) is not necessarily harmless. Eta- reading detransitioners stories is why I keep persisting with these questions. They are important. "no one wanted to get into the dirt with me and parse what gender actually is. they took my word for it, as though i, a teenager, could somehow be an expert on both gender and self. hah!" http://redressalert.tumblr.com

Farrar, I agree with you that criminals are human and should be treated humanely - as an act of our humanity if not theirs. Now, in the case of a person who has used their male sex characteristics to commit a sexual assault, I have real trouble with the idea that they can rewrite the victim's traumatic experience and societal perception of a male perpetrator. The human right to identity (which human right are you looking at? I don't see it under the UDHR) does not override the freedom of conscience, belief and expression. That is where the compelled speech idea comes in. There has already been an instance in the UK where a woman who was assaulted by a transwoman (had not legally transitioned so was still technically as well as physically male) was instructed by a judge to call their attacker 'she' whilst giving testimony under oath. That is compelled speech. That disturbs me.

For the op situation, I'd try to deal with it how I'd deal with any other belief system that we disagreed on. I would respect them as parents and do my best to uphold their requests without violating my own conscience. I don't know exactly where that line would be. I would also have a good think about a prepared response for if I slipped up. My response would be genuinely kind and curious, wanting to support them by trying to understand the worldview better. As to the general conversation... I think there is somewhat a clash of the purpose of language/discourse happening at root. I read posts about changing the world through language and I think I understand that it's coming from a very different set of assumptions. Is language a tool to describe and communicate reality, or is language a tool to mould and affect reality? So, the former sees some of this stuff as totalitarian, while the latter sees it as liberating and we're completely missing each other. Where it kind of jumps off the logic cliff for me is how gender identity is separate and independent of sex, is subjective and immeasurable (defined as 'an innate sense') yet requires masking/changing sex characteristics and identifying as/being recognized as the opposite (or no) sex? I honestly don't understand the if:then sequence here. And I've really, hand on heart tried to understand. Is it that sex (observable biological reality) and gender (? Feeling? Personality?) are assumed and socially reinforced that they're so closely tied? If we could have a discussion about the language - as I said previously - if I knew what was meant by gender & gender identity then we could make progress. I'm talking about the philosophical underpinnings, not of any particular individual.

Yep. That was our thought process for #4. We made it to the hospital for #3 within single digit minutes of his birth... It's not that unusual. I had a friend deliver in the hospital foyer & one almost in the hospital lift. Congrats to your family op, glad that mum and bub are both well!

I have an 11 year old who would get along with your 11 year old very well! Sounds like a fabulous opportunity for her! Don't suppose there's a link to the info? We're waiting a couple of years and then my current 11 year old will probably do a part time metal work apprenticeship with his grandfather. Thanks for the info, will look into it!

I've started planning in the sense that I have some vague ideas floating around, some of them I've even noted down in my bullet journal! This year and next have been stupidly busy, we're still midway through building our house so I'm a part time project manager/nagging wife... Mainly, oldest to be more independent (she'll be in 8th) though I am slightly freaking out about running out of time with my girl. ? She'll probably be excused from most of morning time from next year, then I can give it a younger focus for my little boys. Get my youngest reading! Ugh, have to register him with the new stupid learning plan stupidity. Sorry, I'm sick and cranky lol. I want to make next year an entrepreneur year, kids set up a micro business. And I want to start a science fair for my region. Someone also just asked me to start a choir. We'll hopefully maybe FINALLY finish a history cycle - mid 1700s to modern. At least dd will independently so she can do another cycle in 9th-12th. Most of the actual books/curricula will continue.

Say what?! Need to hear more about this please Rosie! ?

My mum and aunts had it done 20 years ago. They got a discount because it was still in a trial or something. They are all very happy with it. We were there and watched the procedure through the window and on a big screen, it was gross and I cried lol (I was a young tween) I remember walking out of the clinic with mum after the procedure and she was amazed at how everything looked.

I like the domestic dog best I think. Puppy etiquette? Best manners for your best friend. The Delightful Dog? Domestic bliss with every family member.