barnwife Posted November 5, 2018 Share Posted November 5, 2018 I find myself with a dilemma. Recently I discussed possible Christmas presents for our kids with someone we are close to (I'll call her Sue). In that conversation, I mentioned that someone else we are close to (Emily) plans on getting them new tablets. I know this will excite them as they don't currently have them. Anyway, I just got a text from Sue. She bought used, several generations old tablets for them. How do I politely tell her "thanks, but no thanks." There is no way I want to take away this gift from Emily. It's been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad year for her. I know she is looking forward to the joy our kids will get with them. So I definitely have to let Sue know. If it matters, both Sue and Emily are close family members. Please write the email/text I should send Sue. I am afraid my emotions are too tangled in this, as I strongly suspect she is trying to show up Emily. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scholastica Posted November 5, 2018 Share Posted November 5, 2018 "Thank you for your generosity in trying to buy something for my kids that they will really enjoy. I believe I let you know in a previous conversation that Emily is buying new tablets for our children this year. They will not be able to use the duplicates. I hope you can return what you purchased or find a buyer." Sue has really put you in a bad situation. I'm sorry. You let her know what the plan was, she decided to deviate. The consequences are on her. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RootAnn Posted November 5, 2018 Share Posted November 5, 2018 1 hour ago, barnwife said: Anyway, I just got a text from Sue. She bought used, several generations old tablets for them. I am afraid my emotions are too tangled in this, as I strongly suspect she is trying to show up Emily. How is buying old tablets showing up the person who plans on buying new tablets? Just wondering... "Sue, that was really sweet of you to buy those tablets, but as we previously discussed, Emily has already 'taken' that gift idea. I hope you'll gift someone else with the ones you so thoughtfully purchased or can get your money back. The gift ideas we discussed the other day are still open. Much love, barnwife." 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 Sue, there's been a misunderstanding! The kids are already getting tablets. Don't forget to return them quickly because sometimes the return window on electronics can be very short. === In future I'd not discuss other people's gift plans as this can be a sore spot. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barnwife Posted November 6, 2018 Author Share Posted November 6, 2018 1 hour ago, RootAnn said: How is buying old tablets showing up the person who plans on buying new tablets? Just wondering... Because she is trying to give our children a better, more exciting gift than Emily is. It's going to be really hard for anyone to get them a gift that's going to have a better "wow" factor. Heck, I am not even going to try! Thanks for the ideas...they are all much better than anything I'd come up with. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 3 minutes ago, barnwife said: Because she is trying to give our children a better, more exciting gift than Emily is. It's going to be really hard for anyone to get them a gift that's going to have a better "wow" factor. Heck, I am not even going to try! Thanks for the ideas...they are all much better than anything I'd come up with. Yes, but how are old tablets going to be better or more exciting than new tablets? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angie in VA Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 10 minutes ago, happi duck said: Sue, there's been a misunderstanding! The kids are already getting tablets. Don't forget to return them quickly because sometimes the return window on electronics can be very short. === In future I'd not discuss other people's gift plans as this can be a sore spot. This. Least said, soonest mended. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barnwife Posted November 6, 2018 Author Share Posted November 6, 2018 4 minutes ago, KidsHappen said: Yes, but how are old tablets going to be better or more exciting than new tablets? Oh, they won't. But...my kids don't need 2 tablets! So if Sue gives them a tablet and then Emily does, the "wow" factor isn't there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 Just now, barnwife said: Oh, they won't. But...my kids don't need 2 tablets! So if Sue gives them a tablet and then Emily does, the "wow" factor isn't there. I see. Yeah, just let Sue know that she must have misunderstood because Emily is already getting them new tablets and they certainly don't need two. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustEm Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 Would Sue have an opportunity to give them gifts wrapped in person before Emily? Because if so, I would simply not allow it even if you e-mail her and remind her the kids are already getting them. I'd be worried that she would still wrap them up and give them to the kids without you realizing what they were unwrapping. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 (edited) I have a family member who might do such a thing. In my family, the correct response to that text would be "Sue, wth? I told you Emily was getting tablets for the kids. What are you thinking? I hope you can get your money back!" ETA: I know you said "polite." And of course you know your people and I don't. But remember that Sue has done something very impolite herself here. Edited November 6, 2018 by marbel 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 Smh. I mean, who tries to one up someone like this? It's so rude. And... on a budget no less. Like, oy. I think you should play it like it was all a big misunderstanding, the way Happi Duck said. "Oh my gosh. We must have gotten our wires crossed in that conversation. Emily already bought them new tablets." 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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