Are the Board Rules not applicable to Social Groups?

[Book Crazy]

Not quite the same thing at all.

If a group is discussing on their own turf - leave them alone.

 

If the christian group wants to call me an agnostic god hater going straight to hell for an eternity of burning that I soooo deserve - I don't care. I will never read it because I am not going to be reading their group interaction.

 

Coloring on the wall is going to be noticed by the simple act of walking by it on the way to somewhere else. Going into someone's group is looking for trouble. I have to wonder why Kelly was there in the first place.

 

I wonder if there is an infraction for bringing private group discussions to the main board.

 

 

:iagree:

[Cheryl in NM]

I think the question is more about whether or not the moderators bother to moderate the social groups according to the regular board rules or if they've stated somewhere that they won't be. Seems like they may have created a whole lot more work for themselves...LOL!! (Or not, but maybe they could clarify?)

 

If you go into one of the social groups in the top right corner it says they are moderated.

 

That said, I agree to stay out of groups that don't align with your beliefs, but the groups should be held to board rules. Hate-mongoring only increases the differences. I'm not saying anyone was hate-mongoring. In fact, I didn't even know we had social groups until this post and didn't search out the offending posts.

[Blessedfamily]

The whole thing doesn't bug me but the only place I see for private conversations in "PM"/private mail. :001_smile:

[A.J. at J.A.]

To get off on the sidetrack that this thread has taken (perhaps for the best), I personally find it offensive when someone prays for me. I feel like they have taken away my choice in the matter. I've chosen not to involve prayers in my life, and if they pray for me knowing that, its arrogant of them, and it takes away my choice. Thats how I feel, though I think I'm more touchy about it then others.

 

 

Wow! I honestly had no idea. It never occurred to me that when I was praying it would/could be offensive. I'm not judging...just having an "eye-opening" experience from another's POV.

[Gretchen in NJ]

. . . "Social groups are the private properties of the participants, and the participants get to decide which of their hostess's rules they will follow."

 

Or even the one that says, "Private social groups with hidden posts are permitted."

 

The OP is not asking because someone is expressing controversial opinions. She's asking because people are using the social groups as an excuse to insult people with opinions that are unlike their own.

 

Never mind the "What if I made up a Non-Pagan Homeschoolers Group: For Anyone Who's Not a Wiccan, Neo-Pagan, Polytheist, or Animist?" argument. Let's just focus on the fact that the social groups are PUBLIC GROUPS on a forum with particular rules about what you can and can't say in public.

:iagree: Very well stated. We should still be respectful and follow the rules whether we are in the social group or on the main board.

[Gretchen in NJ]

A short trip through the social groups is a quick way to compose your ignore list. It is quite easy to tell which people just have a different worldview, and which are full of hatred and hostility and take much pleasure and glee in expressing it. I feel like I am in perpetual public high school sometimes.

I am afraid to check. I might find some of my friends.:001_huh:

[bkpan]

I am a christian, love my faith/God, but this statement even to me can sound offensive.

 

I've found that statements like this sound like a pat on the head, you are so "misguided" and are in "need" of my prayers. When you have smart, educated people standing infront of you, a statement like this such a turn off -- and insulting. Why do we need to announce who we are praying for? Just pray for them. Good intentions may be the idea, but the tone is condesending and does more harm than good. IMHO

 

Thank you. I agree.

 

Kim

[Parabola]

Wow! I honestly had no idea. It never occurred to me that when I was praying it would/could be offensive. I'm not judging...just having an "eye-opening" experience from another's POV.

 

Thank you for saying that, for listening. And like I said, I recognize that I'm more touchy about it then others. Many others take it differently, perhaps with more grace.

[Deeke]

Thank you for saying that, for listening. And like I said, I recognize that I'm more touchy about it then others. Many others take it differently, perhaps with more grace.

 

 

:iagree: You can add my thanks also.

[Zelda]

Just curious.

 

I totally get it. I personally go out of my way to read things that don't agree with my POV because I think its foolish to live in the Echo Chamber of my own beliefs and to never try to understand what the "other side" thinks. I've come around on many an issue by actually listening to the other side and I've cemented my opposition to them on many an issue by listening to their perspective. I don't blame you for looking. It isn't a private group and no expectation of privacy should have been assumed.

[Gretchen in NJ]

For what it's worth, I'm not a Christian, and I find the posting in a public place of the kind of comments quoted extremely disheartening. It's also just plain rude, since there is every reason to think that the people being mocked might see those posts.

 

I truly just don't understand the need to be mean and hurtful toward others simply because they have different beliefs or values.

 

I'm sorry you all had to see those things.

You are such a sweet heart. What a nice thing to say.

 

*****

[elegantlion]

I totally get it. I personally go out of my way to read things that don't agree with my POV because I think its foolish to live in the Echo Chamber of my own beliefs and to never try to understand what the "other side" thinks. I've come around on many an issue by actually listening to the other side and I've cemented my opposition to them on many an issue by listening to their perspective. I don't blame you for looking. It isn't a private group and no expectation of privacy should have been assumed.

 

I'm stealing "Echo Chamber of my own beliefs". I love that statement.

[Parabola]

I totally get it. I personally go out of my way to read things that don't agree with my POV because I think its foolish to live in the Echo Chamber of my own beliefs and to never try to understand what the "other side" thinks. I've come around on many an issue by actually listening to the other side and I've cemented my opposition to them on many an issue by listening to their perspective. I don't blame you for looking. It isn't a private group and no expectation of privacy should have been assumed.

 

There are times when I want to debate and/or hear the voices of people who are in opposition to me. Debating though, can wear a person out. There are other times when I want to hang around with like-minds, its much more relaxing. I think both are needed.

 

No, these groups are not private and everyone can read them. But what is the use of them if we all still have to be worried about how everyone is going to react. If you look in a group that you know you already disagree with, then be prepared to deal with what you see like an adult. Leave it alone. Live and let live.

 

I would never go to one of the christian groups just to see what I can find that offends me (and there would be plenty) and then point it out to everybody. Who needs the controversy? This became a better place when we got social groups to hang out with people and not argue!! Why are we trying to change that...by starting arguments about our social groups????

[PiCO]

This is interesting to me. If I found out that you were terribly sick, or that one of your kids had been injured, my first response would be to pray for you or your child...praying for health and healing, that type of thing. I'm not sure that's any different than when people say, "I'll think positive thoughts," is it? Or would it still bother you? I'm asking because yesterday at work my boss got a phone call - a bad injury in his immediate family - and he had to leave for the hospital. I told him I'd pray. It never occurred to me that this could be taken as an offense. :confused:

 

Ria

 

 

Hi, Ria-

 

I don't take offense when people I know tell me they'll pray for me. In that case, it is like sending positive thoughts... quite nice, actually. Gives me warm fuzzy feelings.

 

What I find mildly offensive is people saying or implying that they will pray for my soul (because I'm going to hell,) or people I don't know in real life or cyberspace saying they'll pray for me. When I don't know the person, or I know the person disapproves of me, it feels condescending.

 

I find it incredibly offensive when people tell me things go wrong because a person is not praying enough.

[Lovedtodeath]

There are times when I want to debate and/or hear the voices of people who are in opposition to me. Debating though, can wear a person out. There are other times when I want to hang around with like-minds, its much more relaxing. I think both are needed.

 

No, these groups are not private and everyone can read them. But what is the use of them if we all still have to be worried about how everyone is going to react. If you look in a group that you know you already disagree with, then be prepared to deal with what you see like an adult. Leave it alone. Live and let live.

 

I would never go to one of the christian groups just to see what I can find that offends me (and there would be plenty) and then point it out to everybody. Who needs the controversy? This became a better place when we got social groups to hang out with people and not argue!! Why are we trying to change that...by starting arguments about our social groups????

 

Very good point!:iagree:I don't want people snooping around in my social groups. But, if someone does disagree, I would rather they do it here than in the group, because of the reasons you listed.

[Jugglin'5]

I didn't look until the original post came up - at least I don't think I did. But when I did, I admit I was shocked. I shouldn't have been, I guess. What shocked me is that a group would revolve so much about being rudely anti-something. In our reformed Christians group, we mostly talk about "our" stuff. Not what ignorant jerks those other guys are. But believe me, I will be staying away in the future. My.word.:001_huh:

[H.S. Burrow]

I took a look and the really sad thing is that the group in question knew that a Christian was reading.:confused:

 

There are quite a few Christians in the Secular WTMers group, myself included.

 

We use a mix of secular and Christian materials. I joined the Secular WTMers group because I do have questions about secular curriculums....but I knew I was joining a secular group and don't let the things I don't agree with bother me.

 

If this is in reference to the NON-CHRISTIAN HOMESCHOOLERS group......ummm....they don't hold a Christian worldview and it plainly says so. If you do hold a Christian worldview, then that is NOT the place for you.

 

And I have read many posts by Christians that make fun of and put down others who don't have their worldview. And many from specific "flavors" of Christianity that don't care for the other "flavors" of Christianity.

 

I count many people on this board a friend - no matter what worldview they hold. If one of my friends did something to offend me, then I would say so - to them...not the general board. But we as Christians need to remember as someone said in an earlier post: Many non-Christians have very valid reasons for their beliefs - whatever they are - and we should respect them.

 

Sometimes being a witness for Christ is simply...well....being.

[Jenny in Florida]

This became a better place when we got social groups to hang out with people and not argue!! Why are we trying to change that...by starting arguments about our social groups????

 

See, I disagree. I have found the board changed for the worse by the addition of the social groups. It seems to me that many folks are spending much of their board time in those groups, rather than out here with the rest of us. And since, as usual, there is no group for me, it leaves me feeling left out and lonely. Again.

 

It feels to me a lot like going to a party and finding that most of the other guests have broken up into smaller groups behind closed doors.

 

I guess I just don't get it, since I thought the consensus was that most folks didn't want these sorts of divisions.

[Ria]

Hi, Ria-

 

I don't take offense when people I know tell me they'll pray for me. In that case, it is like sending positive thoughts... quite nice, actually. Gives me warm fuzzy feelings.

 

What I find mildly offensive is people saying or implying that they will pray for my soul (because I'm going to hell,) or people I don't know in real life or cyberspace saying they'll pray for me. When I don't know the person, or I know the person disapproves of me, it feels condescending.

 

I find it incredibly offensive when people tell me things go wrong because a person is not praying enough.

 

Oh, that's so good to hear. I would not want to offend anyone by trying to express my concern in that type of case.

 

And I understand what you are saying about people praying for you as some type of condescending remark. I'm a Christian, but I've had that unpleasant experience as well ("You don't believe like I do. I'll pray for you."). I actually had a friend (former friend now) tell me that the reason I almost died from peritonitis from Crohn's disease was because I had hidden sin in my life and hadn't confessed it or prayed enough; this was followed up with, "I'll pray for you." I was horribly offended and irate. So I understand what you are saying...offered prayer can be warm and fuzzy, or a smear, or even a slap in the face, I think.

 

Ria

[Susan Wise Bauer]

Pictures and posts which are directly offensive and mocking of religious beliefs--and I don't just mean Christianity--will not be permitted. Those who continue to post them will be banned, first temporarily and then (if they persist) permanently. The social groups will NOT be made private. This is a public message board, for the public discussion of home schooling, and it will remain public; anyone who wants to create their own private Internet space should do so in their own domain.

 

I hope that's clear. We have not been keeping a super close eye on the social groups, but will begin to do so now.

 

SWB