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Anyone with an only child?


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Find a good support group where your child can be involved with the same group of kids on a regular basis. This doesn't have to be an academic co-op. We found a mix of structured and unstructured activities to be helpful---structured ones helped break the ice. Once you find that group, show up on a regular basis, especially at first, to give time for things to develop, and be willing to work for the group organizing or helping to organize activities that your child will enjoy. Don't wait on someone else to do it for you.

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I have an only that we have homeschooled all the way through to 9th grade so far. She seemed extroverted when she was little, and I joined three different support groups so that she would have lots of social options. But I did not burden myself by thinking she had to be with other kids every day. One or two big social events a week seemed enough to me.

 

As my child grew older, she developed a lot of interests and seemed to grow more introverted. Now she has band and orchestra and choir and art class and very little time for purely social gatherings. She keeps up with friends electronically during busy times. She is a busy, very creative child who is never at a loss for things to do. Compared to her peers, she relates extra well to adults and younger kids. She is a very happy kid and loves her life!

 

So, don't worry. Just dive in and see how it goes.

Edited by Pronghorn
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I have an only that we have homeschooled all the way through to 9th grade so far. She seemed extroverted when she was little, and I joined three different support groups so that she would have lots of social options. But I did not burden myself by thinking she had to be with other kids every day. One or two big social events a week seemed enough to me.

 

As my child grew older, she developed a lot of interests and seemed to grow more introverted. Now she has band and orchestra and choir and art class and very little time for purely social gatherings. She keeps up with friends electronically during busy times. She is a busy, very creative child who is never at a loss for things to do. Compared to her peers, she relates extra well to adults and younger kids. She is a very happy kid and loves her life!

 

So, don't worry. Just dive in and see how it goes.

 

I could have written this with a few changes (10th grade, interests are writing, Girl Scouts, and martial arts, with backstage theater work at times). I worried a lot more than I needed to when she was younger about a need to have lots of kids around, including moving to a neighborhood with a lot of kids. I needn't have worried. She played occasionally with a few neighbors and did neighborhood swim team two years, but really has had little interaction and no real friendships. Her friendships have come from martial arts (same dojo since she was 6 and the daughter of the sensei is her best friend--she is a public schooler) and from the homeschool support group we've been in since she was 4 (the Girl Scout group grew out of that so there's a big overlap in kids). 

 

Things that I think did help were sending her to a half-day preschool that focused on social interaction rather than academics (2 half days at 2, 3 at 3, 4 at 4), as well as making a commitment to consistently go to the homeschool support group's weekly park day and on field trips, etc so that she saw the same group of kids regularly. Our academic path is quite different than most of the families in the group, but I have always viewed it as primarily valuable for extracurriculars and social interaction (for both of us--homeschooling can feel isolating at times even for an introverted parent). There are times now that I go to park day on my own to see my friends, leaving her to work on her online classes at home. With lots of outsourced classes, there's less time during the school year to just go hang out every week, and that seems pretty common across the board. We've made Girl Scout camping trips and such more of a priority for that reasonl.

Edited by KarenNC
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Yes. My dd is a very sociable introvert. I feel like we're in the car *all the time* but we live in the country and that's life in the country. We live walking distance to the shops, so we grocery shop pretty much daily. That adds some sociability to her days at home that doesn't cost petrol money.

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I homeschool an extroverted only. As a family we are busy with church and community activities and we spend a lot of time with extended family. Ds also takes a few elective classes at the public high school and has a good group of friends a couple of towns away that we make sure he sees frequently.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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I have an only. She is fairly extroverted and meeting her social needs is absolutely a difficulty for me. We'll be moving in 2017 and I look forward to leaving my small town for a city for many reasons, including having more options for homeschool groups and extracurriculars.

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