athomeontheprairie Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 A family member is an extreme hoarder. Basically, her house isn't safe. If ever there was a fire, she wouldn't be able to get out in time and there is no way firemen could go in. Trash everywhere. Everything (including the people) smell. It's really really bad. I'd really like to get this person help. I'd like them to have a clean, safe place to live. Neither dh or I have the time And really, the skill set) to help. We WOULD help, but more help would be needed. But, they don't live inside the city limits. Others closer on the family won't do anything as it jeopardizes their living situation and the family that lives away cannot fathom how horrible it is. But no one seems willing to do anything. I'd love to have a well check. But who do I call? Can I do it anonymously? If they condemn the house I don't want blamed, kwim? Can they condemn a house in the country, outside the city limits and not tied to city laws and ordinances? We have sought to help in the past. Taking truck loads of trash to the dump. Other family members sought help from a psychologist- but nothing helps and it doesn't get better. How do I help? Call adult protective services? The health department? Non emergency police? Fire station (this is my last option, as it would be a rural department that mostly treats grass fires and is volunteer run. . I'm not sure if they would or could do anything) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Okra Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 Hugs. Hoarding is hard. I know you want to help, but I don't think it will help if you go and try to clean things up. The only way is to get professional help. (You probably know this….) I suppose I would call adult protective services, anonymously if possible. Good luck to you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 I have no idea about this but I have wondered if it would help to encourage them to garden. Composting seems a kind of healthy way to hoard, if that's a person's inclination. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne in CA Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 I second calling adult and family services and throwing yourself on their mercy. It seems terrible for such a person to risk a fire and the lives of the emergency personnel who would risk their lives in the event of such a fire. The people who don't want to take action are just not bigger picture thinkers. They don't see everything the way it really is. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 You would need professional psychological help for them. This is most likely not as simple as cleaning up. There are profound underlying issues when people truly hoard as you describe. As far as how it's done, perhaps the first step is Adult Protection or if they are elderly the appropriate agency for elderly people in your area. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 first - hoarding is a mental illness. it can respond to antidepressants and antianxiety drugs, with therapy starting afterwards. cleaning doesn't solve the problem - they'll just go get more stuff to replace it. if they aren't in the city limits, you'll have to call the county because they have jurisdiction. the health dept, or senior services should be able to give you advice if they can't help. if they want to just pass the buck - point out it is also a health hazard for their neighbors because extreme hoarding attracts vermin. and the fire dept that has to respond to an emergency . . . . 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 Taking truckloads of trash to the dump is, strange as it seems, counterproductive. People don't hoard because they're lazy. Removing the stuff can be very upsetting, psychologically, and actually make the hoarding worse. Many psychologists are not exactly experts in hoarding either, and even if you get the help of a psychologist who knows what they're dealing with, nothing works unless your family member recognizes that this is a problem and WANTS to change. I don't want to be mean here, but even contacting the authorities might not help unless they really know how to handle hoarding issues. They can condemn the property... but then your family member will move somewhere else and do it all even more. I have seen this happen. (NOT within my own family this time, thank goodness. And actually it was the landlord kicked them out. They moved to a bigger place and just filled it all up within a year.) However, you do have to do something if they're living in Collyer's conditions. If the only viable option is to contact the authorities, so be it. Maybe you'll luck out and the local authorities will have a system for hoarders. At the very least, it'll take several months to build up again. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomeontheprairie Posted August 3, 2015 Author Share Posted August 3, 2015 Taking truckloads of trash to the dump is, strange as it seems, counterproductive. People don't hoard because they're lazy. Removing the stuff can be very upsetting, psychologically, and actually make the hoarding worse. Many psychologists are not exactly experts in hoarding either, and even if you get the help of a psychologist who knows what they're dealing with, nothing works unless your family member recognizes that this is a problem and WANTS to change. I don't want to be mean here, but even contacting the authorities might not help unless they really know how to handle hoarding issues. They can condemn the property... but then your family member will move somewhere else and do it all even more. I have seen this happen. (NOT within my own family this time, thank goodness. And actually it was the landlord kicked them out. They moved to a bigger place and just filled it all up within a year.) However, you do have to do something if they're living in Collyer's conditions. If the only viable option is to contact the authorities, so be it. Maybe you'll luck out and the local authorities will have a system for hoarders. At the very least, it'll take several months to build up again. We've only taken stuff to the dump because help had been asked for. This is on the country, and consequently there is no trash pick up. Here you burn your trash, and that IS hard sometimes. It's no excuse, but I really think if she had trash pickup it wouldn't be so bad. She went to the psychologist at the request of another. She doesn't want to go, and honestly I don't think this person can help ("it can't be that bad, can it?" "Um, it's worse") past of being rural means we don't have amazing services locally. If we don't contact authorities, what do we do? And to answer someone else up thread, there are no neighbors. Nearest are two miles away, so vermin only affects them. We maintain live traps to keep the raccoons and opossum away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisbeth Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 It sounds like the local authorities there might be iffy, but without outside help, it is nearly impossible to help a hoarder. Even with professional help it's hard. :( 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted August 3, 2015 Share Posted August 3, 2015 Yeah simply removing trash or cleaning the place up won't address the problem. It only addresses the problem of the condition of the house. They need some sort of treatment. No clue what the success rate of that is or what works best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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