athomemom Posted January 7, 2015 Author Share Posted January 7, 2015 Another point to consider, what will you do when they are in college? Even if they live at home you need to let them go. Please do not be the mom does her kids' laundry until they move out. Giving your kids repsonsibity makes them repsonsible. If you are always there to solve thier problems, they will not learn problem solving skills. For example, your son needs to eat early, give him instructions on how to turn the crockpot on or how to heat something up. You can teach him to cook one meal. Another thing to consider is that if you quit this job so early on, how will it impact the next time you try to get a job? Maybe not at all, but it is something to think about. You also started this job over the holidays; give it time doing it with your real scheudle. If your kids can drive in June, they should be fine by Sep. to drive to CC. Change is hard. It is just plain hard. Change is hard. My kids certainly do their fair share around here. Both can warm up food or make simple things. However, *I* feel that it is my job to do when the one works at 4/5. He schools until 3, and will work until after 10 pm. He needs some chill time. Both can also clean as well as any girl. I have trained them well. Heck, they probably clean better than me. ;) Seriously, they do their part. I just miss doing mine. I agree that I need to give it more time. I really miss being home... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LLMom Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 I think you should try to make it work. It is good for mom to have something for herself and for kids to see that everything doesn't revolve around them. Since you have older kids, I think it can work. Can you teach your son to cook for himself? Teens are capable with a bit of guidance. And at that age, they should be fairly independent in their school work so they could do a lot while you are at work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomemom Posted January 7, 2015 Author Share Posted January 7, 2015 I think you should try to make it work. It is good for mom to have something for herself and for kids to see that everything doesn't revolve around them. Since you have older kids, I think it can work. Can you teach your son to cook for himself? Teens are capable with a bit of guidance. And at that age, they should be fairly independent in their school work so they could do a lot while you are at work. Yes, the boys do several video classes and I do what I need to with review, etc. before I leave. They have been independent with many things for a while now. Maybe I should start a thread asking for easy meals to get them started with. Of course, I have several in mind, but perhaps I could glean a few more recipes... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 Maybe I should start a thread asking for easy meals to get them started with. Of course, I have several in mind, but perhaps I could glean a few more recipes... I would list out all the recipes you use that take less than an hour and give the list to your kids. Let them prioritize which ones they would like to learn to make for themselves. Eventually they probably should learn all of them over the next couple of years. You could also rearrange the schedule so your working son could stop schooling at 2:30 on the days when you are not there. Or schedule "home ec" at that time. ;) They could make up the difference on other days which are more flexible for them. I also think it is perfectly fine for them to have a sandwich / fresh fruit & vegetable for dinner until they learn to cook some things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSmomof2 Posted January 8, 2015 Share Posted January 8, 2015 You all have given me much to ponder. My boys do quite a bit around the house, but not cooking. It is difficult for hubby to help out. He works 10 hours per day at the least. He isn't available to do to much around here. He is exhausted when he comes home. One son works 20 hours per week, participates in karate, and youth, plus high school - he doesn't have too much time at home to do too much either. Thus, I WANT to cook for him before he goes off to work. This is challenging when I get off at 3. And because he works evenings, it makes it really hard to get started at 8 am. I let him sleep in this morning because he hasn't been feeling well. My back and legs (veins) have been hurting since I started the job. I am definitely out of shape. It isn't very exciting. LOL I definitely do not feel like I am "making friends", but I am out of the house. On the other hand, it is nice making a little money. I also feel like the next two years are what I have left with the boys, and I know it is only 10 hours per week, but I feel guilty and feel like I should be here for/with them. I do the same job at our library here, 15-hrs/week. I've been doing it for about 4 months now. The physical aspect of the job does get easier as you get used to it. (I also have varicose veins, and it was really hard the first month or so). My dc are 9 & 12. We aren't homeschooling this year, but 2 of my 3 shifts are in the evening. Scheduling, especially meals, is hard. I've been using my crockpot on those days I'm not home, and it's been working pretty well. I would say if you like the job overall, (and I know it's not exciting, but I'm also hoping to move up to another position in time), then give it a couple months. It's an adjustment for everyone when mom goes back to work after being home. If you then find it's not worth it, then resign. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted January 8, 2015 Share Posted January 8, 2015 However...if you plan on returning to the work force, this part-time job will look good on the resume. However...if it stresses you out more than give you joy, it may not be worth it. There will be likely volunteer opportunities later which you can use to ease back into the work force if that is what you want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted January 8, 2015 Share Posted January 8, 2015 Which way are you leaning Kim? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomemom Posted January 8, 2015 Author Share Posted January 8, 2015 Which way are you leaning Kim? I worked today 9-1. It was better because I got to work the front desk and do other things besides shelving. I will mostly likely give it a couple of weeks and see how it goes. I'm still stressed, and still uncertain, but that's where I am. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted January 9, 2015 Share Posted January 9, 2015 I worked today 9-1. It was better because I got to work the front desk and do other things besides shelving. I will mostly likely give it a couple of weeks and see how it goes. I'm still stressed, and still uncertain, but that's where I am. Yes, I'd give it a bit more time. You started at a really bad time of year, with Christmas business and stress, and it's an adjustment either way. Keep us posted! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted January 9, 2015 Share Posted January 9, 2015 I think your sons are at a perfect age for you to transition into doing something for yourself. I wouldn't wait two years. You could advance your position in that time. Your 16-year-old NEEDS to learn to feed himself properly, even if he starts with once a week. It's a life skill like reading or shoe-tying. I'm sure you loved reading to him, but taught him to read anyway. Could you cook for him the night before and he can reheat the next day? Also, 8:30 a.m. is about three hours later than a lot of high schoolers sleep. He should be fine. Besides, he can grab a nap after school if he needs to. Kids that age should be able to easily spare you for ten hours. Could you all just be adjusting to the change? That could take a little time, but should get easier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomemom Posted January 13, 2015 Author Share Posted January 13, 2015 Good morning, ladies, I turned in my notice yesterday. I have been working for a month. Long enough to know what I needed to do. After chatting further with my BFF and my dh, I feel that this is my best option for now. I wish I could stay in some ways and in other ways I am relieved. I appreciate you all taking the time to offer advice and helping me think through this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chelle in MO Posted January 13, 2015 Share Posted January 13, 2015 I'm glad you're not in limbo anymore! Enjoy this phase of life; the next one will be here before you know it! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomemom Posted January 13, 2015 Author Share Posted January 13, 2015 I'm glad you're not in limbo anymore! Enjoy this phase of life; the next one will be here before you know it! :001_smile: Thank you, me too! I am glad and thankful as well. My time with my guys is indeed short. I have much to do still before they are gone though. I plan to make every moment count! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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