ILiveInFlipFlops Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 My two (11 and 8) are finally enjoying riding their bikes on a daily basis, which I'm thrilled about (they tend to be pretty sedentary), so I let them go around the block on their own. I was pretty comfortable with that decision until DH questioned it, and then I found out that the two neighborhood boys aren't allowed to go outside of a certain distance (pretty much to each other's house), and they're slightly older than my girls. My DDs are cautious but confident riders, our streets are quiet, and we live in a "good" neighborhood. And then, of course, there's the whole "Back in the day, I rode all over town and I was younger than that!" side of the debate. It's kind of funny how DH is afraid to let them go around the block, but he grew up riding his bike alone all over the mean streets of Washington Heights in NYC :lol: Anyway, how nervous would you be about letting them ride alone around the block in the middle of the day? ETA: They usually go alone and separately--one likes to go one way and one likes to go the other, or they go in a way that they pass each other at some point. I do also have them check in with me every few times around. I can't see them from my windows once they go past a certain point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 If they have good judgment (i.e. about safety and potential risks), I would feel totally fine letting them ride their bikes around the block. I'd let them go even farther when they're riding their bikes together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2bee Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 During trips to visit relatives in south FL we could only go in groups of 3+ to ride around the block. By our selves we were allowed only up to the stop sign and back both ways. In our hometown and our neighborhood, we were allowed much more freedom. But we had a pretty big yard and many kids rode their bikes up and down the winding road. It would depend on how many parents are home during the day and how close of any eye I was keeping on the kids from the yard or window. I would get all riders a loud-loud whistle to use in case of emergency to get attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 In our neighborhood, two kids together? I wouldn't even think about being nervous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 My 12 year old is allowed to do a three mile loop around the neighborhood lake. My 8 and 6 year olds ride around the block. I can see the vast majority of the block from my house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILiveInFlipFlops Posted October 13, 2013 Author Share Posted October 13, 2013 In our neighborhood, two kids together? I wouldn't even think about being nervous. Thanks, you made me realize I had to clarify. They actually ride separately, though they do pass each other in their wanderings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 Nowhere, but that's because they're newish riders. They're not great at braking yet. ;) They're allowed to walk several blocks away though and as soon as their bike skills catch up, they'll be allowed to bike even farther. They're 9 yo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2bee Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 I'd give the girls some good whistles to wear around their necks and keep an ear out. 8, in my opinion, is a little young to be riding solo, but if she is capable, careful and confident it might be ok. I would try and be aware of who usually is or isn't home during the day and keep watch for any changes in neighborhood loitering but nothing out there and extreme. For me: Them staying together would be the most basic requirement for going out. What are your DH's concerns? I guess this is something that needs to be worked out with him first and foremost. Both of you guys should feel that the kids are reasonably safe during the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatHomeschoolDad Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 Totally depends on the location. We're on a very busy street, in a small but congested town, so my answer here would be "within sight." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 8, in my opinion, is a little young to be riding solo, but if she is capable, careful and confident it might be ok. At age 8, I lived on my bike. I rode my bike to school and back every day (15 min. each way), and spent all afternoon riding around the neighborhood (at least a 5 block radius). Granted, it was the 70's. But this was an inner city neighborhood. From what the OP has described (safe neighborhood and 1 block radius), I think her DDs will be just fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2bee Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 I kind of got the feeling that she (or rather her husband) was worried about their safety--less from a bike riding point and a little more from a someone could harm/kidnap them point--I rode all over my families property from the age of 6 and took to the streets (or rather the road) with my siblings on skates and a bike at around 7. There aren't any blocks out where I live but the visibility up and down the road is limited. We could go up the road a ways though. I admit that I am a little paranoid about kids and bikes though since seeing the Amber Hagerman story on lifetime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparrow Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 Together, I'd let them go around the neighborhood, no problem. My dh is also the one that had some reservations about the kids riding their bikes. He had the unfortunate experience of losing a classmate, at age 13, to a random kidnapping and murder when the boy was biking to the store. This was in a nice, suburban neighborhood in the mid-eighties. So despite knowing the odds are basically nil, dh knows it *can* happen and it makes him a bit more cautious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 OP - you said you were fine with this until your DH voiced a concern. What is the specific concern? Is this just because the neighbor boys aren't allowed to go that far? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dory Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 My almost 10yo ds doesn't ride his bike very far but he bought a small quad with his own money and he is allowed to drive that to his grandparents so long as everyone on both sides is aware of it. He has to go down a main road for that so we have done a lot of prepping and teaching for him to be allowed to do that one. Growing up, at his age I road all over town on my own. Often I had a brother with me, but I road to friends houses and around the block all the time. I had to let my mom know what I was doing and where I was going, but otherwise I wasn't allowed to ride around if my chores and schoolwork were all done. I knew how to be safe. I had my own paper route as soon as I was 13 though so I'm glad I was able to get the feel of the town on my own before that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 OP - you said you were fine with this until your DH voiced a concern. What is the specific concern? Is this just because the neighbor boys aren't allowed to go that far? I was wondering the same thing. If your dh has a valid concern or feels very strongly about this, I would err on the side of caution. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 When the kids were younger, about three to four blocks around and back. Now that they are teens, 6-12 miles round trip total alone. They've done 15 or so together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILiveInFlipFlops Posted October 13, 2013 Author Share Posted October 13, 2013 Thanks, everyone. No, he has no specific concern. They'd been riding during the day for a few weeks before they happened to ask him (he was home that day) if they could go ride around the block and he said no. When we talked about it, his response was, "Do you think that's safe?" I think it's just the vague paranoia we all feel when we let our kids out of our sight. I feel it too, don't get me wrong. But I also feel like he and I have both lamented about how neither of the kids ever wanted to do anything physical, and here they were finally really enjoying doing something physical, that we did when we were their age (and did in much more "risky" ways). My own decision was that the benefits outweighed the risks. I'll ask him to see if I'm wrong and he does have more specific concerns, but I think he's just generally worried about the what-ifs. Whistles are a great idea, I'll look into that. That is so sad about the 13-year-old :( I remember hearing the story about Jaycee Dugard and thinking how horrible it is that even at her age, even just walking to the schoolbus, we can't possibly keep them safe :( It's just not right. We live not far from where Megan Kanka was abducted, so I tend to be hyper aware too. I even have a hard time with them sleeping with their windows open on nice nights! I'm actively trying to not be so fearful over it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JessReplanted Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 This has been an issue for me recently as my 10 year old son wants to be able to ride further and further. We started with him just going around the block last year. Now, we are trying to confine him to our neighborhood, and have told him not to cross the 'busy' roads that surround this area. It's such a struggle because I don't want to be a 'helicopter mom', and I also want him to get out and exercise, but you just never know what could happen. There is a park up the street from us and he wants to be able to ride his bike there by himself and play, but we have said, "No", because we've seen homeless/suspicious adults hanging out there by themselves. Anyway, I would be O.K. with your kids riding around the block and checking in every once in a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILiveInFlipFlops Posted October 13, 2013 Author Share Posted October 13, 2013 This has been an issue for me recently as my 10 year old son wants to be able to ride further and further. We started with him just going around the block last year. Now, we are trying to confine him to our neighborhood, and have told him not to cross the 'busy' roads that surround this area. It's such a struggle because I don't want to be a 'helicopter mom', and I also want him to get out and exercise, but you just never know what could happen. There is a park up the street from us and he wants to be able to ride his bike there by himself and play, but we have said, "No", because we've seen homeless/suspicious adults hanging out there by themselves. Anyway, I would be O.K. with your kids riding around the block and checking in every once in a while. Yeah, we have a nice little park at the end of our street that I know they'd love to ride to as well, but to get there, they have to cross a crazy busy main road that's 45 miles an hour (which really ticks me off, but that's another post), and none of us are OK with that! They don't even ask, because we're all so intimidated by that road! It's too bad though, because I think it IS a safe park otherwise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyofsixreboot Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 I wouldn't worry but I tend to let my kids roam. I understand location makes a difference. Strangely I have stringent rules about bike helmet usage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amo_mea_filiis. Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 Mine are not allowed to ride without me unless they're on our street. However, they can walk all over town. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gentlemommy Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 With dd1, I wasn't comfortable letting her ride alone until she was 7, and we lived in a safer neighborhood. With dd2, she could go along with dd1 when she was 5 (dd1 at that point was 8). I could hear them in they yelled from the entire block, plus we knew neighbors on all sides of the block, so I was fine with it. I tend to give them independence sooner than dh would, although he trusts my judgement. I'm often alone with the three kids, since he travels a lot. This has forced me (and them!) to learn how to manage and do more things on their own. For instance, we went to the county fair this week. Kids are 8.5, 5.5, and 3. Since the older two wanted to ride some things that the toddler couldn't, I allowed them to wait in lines together at one ride while I took the toddler on another ride. The rides were close, I could usually see the bigger girls waiting in line, but they knew the safety procedures, what to do if they got lost, what to do if someone approached them, where they were and we're not allowed to go...and I had to trust them. I never ever would have done that sort of thing with dd1, but life has changed. In our current neighborhood, they are allowed to walk ahead to the playground (just 7-8 houses down from ours) or the tennis courts (have to cross two streets, but still only a 3 minute walk) and I'll meet them there. They love the independence. They take it very seriously. They aren't afraid to tell someone they aren't allowed to answer personal questions, veer off the course, or go elsewhere. I do think that a lot of the general kid population lacks 'street smarts'. I get it, it's scary, we see news reports and it's terrifying. However, the likelihood of those things happening is SO slim. Which is why we hear about them. It's much more likely for me to get into a fatal car accident with them in the car than for a perfect stranger to kidnap them. Not saying it doesn't happen, of course there are sickos out there, but the chances are small. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K&Rs Mom Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 Mine are the same ages, and are allowed about a mile radius as long as they tell me where they're going. That's big enough to include a few friends' houses, a couple of parks/playgrounds, the library & downtown stores (small town). We don't have a home phone, instead we have a third cell phone, so if one is going somewhere beyond our block alone I'll usually have her take that with her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dory Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 I asked my dh how far he'd be comfortable with our ds riding his bike. He said that he would give them a whistle, a gps unit in their pocket and tell them not to cross any busy streets. Otherwise, they would be free to roam the neighborhood. No busy street crossing would keep them in the neighborhood. We are talking a rural neighborhood though. It has it's own dangers though. We have black bear that roam through here regularly as well as wolves. A couple years ago there was a wolf that chased a guy on his skidoo in the area. That always freaks me out a little. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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