BarbecueMom Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 What do you do when all the 3-5yo "cuteness" starts to grate on your nerves, let alone the normal behavior and destruction? Assume that alcohol, chocolate, shipping them to Grandma's, and DH taking them out of the house for a while are all off-the-table for the time being for various reasons. I realized today that DS3's early morning rant about the amount of sunlight on the longest day of the year was far more irritating than it should have been. I think I need... something. Just don't know what. :-/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 Ideas that worked for me at those ages: Exercise, both for me and for them Making the hour rest time an hour and a half Allowing extra tv time during "the witching hour" before DH came home Pretending they belonged to someone else and I was just the paid help Finding time for a super engaging project with them each morning that had the potential to be continued without me after 30+ minutes of my involvement Putting a sandbox in the back yard and filling it with cool building toys Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 Nap/quiet time is very important. It is essential when the primary caregiver cannot get away. My dc are much older now, but I really enforced nap and bedtime schedules at home. Dc who didn't sleep had to stay in thier room. I could read, do an exercise video or sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 Oh and also lots of prayer plus written scripture and quotes to remind me of how short this time really is. Having a good friend to vent to occasionally helps as well. I also spent time looking at their baby pictures. I needed to cement their cuteness and touch again that feeling I had when I first held them so I could ride it like a life raft through the rough moments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbecueMom Posted June 21, 2013 Author Share Posted June 21, 2013 Ideas that worked for me at those ages: Exercise, both for me and for them Making the hour rest time an hour and a half Allowing extra tv time during "the witching hour" before DH came home Pretending they belonged to someone else and I was just the paid help Finding time for a super engaging project with them each morning that had the potential to be continued without me after 30+ minutes of my involvement Putting a sandbox in the back yard and filling it with cool building toys The exercise/walks/hikes worked until now. 33 weeks pregnant and my body's already screaming at me to slow down and sit. I'm having problems gaining weight, so I'm trying not to burn more calories than I have to. They're pretty good at entertaining themselves. They've been inside and outside playing together all morning without much of my intervention, other than to help them get the popsicles out of the molds. It's not really *them* that's the problem, it's me. Probably the pregnancy hormones. Most women cry or eat ice cream, I just get annoyed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soufflegirl Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 If we're talking about when I need rescuing immediately, I make them hot chocolate, plop them on the couch, and let them watch Postman Pat on Netflix for an hour. I figure that will do far less damage long term than having me flip out at them all day over things that really aren't that serious but are driving me up the walls. Then I go hide in my room. :) If we're talking about me unwinding in general if it's been a tough week, after the kids go to bed I make up popcorn and have a Sherlock/Doctor Who/random British drama on Netflix marathon and leave the laundry folding for the morning. Usually gives me something else to add to my list of phobias besides angel statues, killer taxi drivers, and GPS devices, at which point my kids don't seem so bad after all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 The exercise/walks/hikes worked until now. 33 weeks pregnant and my body's already screaming at me to slow down and sit. I'm having problems gaining weight, so I'm trying not to burn more calories than I have to. They're pretty good at entertaining themselves. It's not really *them* that's the problem, it's me. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: That's so hard. Can you put them in a room with a movie and hide somewhere? I remember days (weeks, sometimes) where I just wanted to crawl under my covers and cry because I couldn't complete a single uninterrupted thought, but knowing that even if I tried it they would find me. Even if they were being good, it was just that my brain was done and for various reasons there was no ability to get a break until (dh was done with school for the semester, a big work project was done, etc.). And it seemed that doing anything with them at those ages when I felt like that created more work for me, so it didn't solve the problem. I know this isn't helpful, but I wanted to let you know you're not alone. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbecueMom Posted June 21, 2013 Author Share Posted June 21, 2013 If we're talking about when I need rescuing immediately, I make them hot chocolate, plop them on the couch, and let them watch Postman Pat on Netflix for an hour. I figure that will do far less damage long term than having me flip out at them all day over things that really aren't that serious but are driving me up the walls. Then I go hide in my room. :) If we're talking about me unwinding in general if it's been a tough week, after the kids go to bed I make up popcorn and have a Sherlock/Doctor Who/random British drama on Netflix marathon and leave the laundry folding for the morning. Usually gives me something else to add to my list of phobias besides angel statues, killer taxi drivers, and GPS devices, at which point my kids don't seem so bad after all... Yeah, it might be a Magic School Bus marathon day. They've been burnt out on screen time lately, and actually haven't asked for it in weeks. DS3 tends to just pee on the floor instead of going to the bathroom if he's watching something, though. I could lock myself in my room and watch Doctor Who. I bet I'd feel better if I watched Doomsday again and had a good cry. (That cab driver was creepier than Moriarty.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soufflegirl Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 That cab driver shows up in everything! He was in the episode of Midsomer Murders I watched the other night, and he's in The Fires of Pompeii also. Gives me the creeps every time! The ending of Vincent and the Doctor requires a box of tissues here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 The exercise/walks/hikes worked until now. 33 weeks pregnant and my body's already screaming at me to slow down and sit. I'm having problems gaining weight, so I'm trying not to burn more calories than I have to. They're pretty good at entertaining themselves. They've been inside and outside playing together all morning without much of my intervention, other than to help them get the popsicles out of the molds. It's not really *them* that's the problem, it's me. Probably the pregnancy hormones. Most women cry or eat ice cream, I just get annoyed. (((Hugs))) I am sorry. I was on partial bed rest with Bug and the feeling of never ending pregnancy added to the feeling of being trapped on the couch with two kids under age 5 as your jailers is tough. In addition to the things I listed, (except the exercise which I was not allowed to do at the end of pregnancy #3), I remember allowing things I never allowed just to break things up. We played with play doh in the living room on a beach blanket. I allowed, in the living room, building of and napping in forts built from appliance boxes. ( You can get them for Free at Lowes) I pre-buy toys for birthdays and Christmas; during this time I raided my stash to give them a new shiney and buy myself a bit of a breather. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomtoCandJ Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 I do what Wendyk does with dd, except mine is early pregnancy fatigue. Though sometimes dd will fall asleep and we tend to watch animal documentaries like planet Earth or Life. Dd will be in school when late pregnancy hits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbecueMom Posted June 21, 2013 Author Share Posted June 21, 2013 Thanks all. I feel better by posting this, plus the leftover knock-off Steak n Shake Frisco melt put me in a much better mood. So fake fast food seems to be the cure, lol. I know I probably need to relax a little bit on the "rules" too. I tend to lean toward the anal retentive side of picking up toys and stuff, even more so when hormonal. I'd even be willing to let go of DS3 wearing shoes outside... if he'd leave the rest of his clothes on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KrissiK Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 I feel your pain. I'm sitting at my computer right now, working on curriculum. I have a 2 year old under my chair and a 4 year old on the couch arm right behind me. I've cleaned up a lake of pee-pee in the kitchen this morning already and just barely managed to get her to the potty on time to avoid a poop incident (which is no fun since she loves fruit, plums especially). It's tough here in the trenches. You've gotten good ideas. I try the same things. My only time of real peace is during nap time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lailasmum Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 An endless supply of cardboard boxes and washable markers helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.Dup. Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 I get especially testy and annoyed at the end of my pregnancies. Some days I can barely stand to be around them at all. Hang in there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbecueMom Posted June 21, 2013 Author Share Posted June 21, 2013 I get especially testy and annoyed at the end of my pregnancies. Some days I can barely stand to be around them at all. Hang in there. Okay, phew, it's not just me! They've been playing with cars and trains nicely all day long, but... but... but, they're still here! And they require food! And things like napkins and clothing changes and potty reminders! And they keep asking why my butt disappears when I sit down! It's just one of those days where that should be funny but I want to scream at the randomness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 Take him to the nearest park/splash pad and let him go. My kids spent time at those places several times a week when they were little. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbecueMom Posted June 21, 2013 Author Share Posted June 21, 2013 Take him to the nearest park/splash pad and let him go. My kids spent time at those places several times a week when they were little. :) It's too hot and humid for me to take them anywhere outside on my own right now. I had pertussis early on in this pregnancy and my lungs/throat never really got a chance to fully recover. I cough like crazy and have trouble breathing if I'm out for too long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saraha Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 Okay, phew, it's not just me! They've been playing with cars and trains nicely all day long, but... but... but, they're still here! And they require food! And things like napkins and clothing changes and potty reminders! And they keep asking why my butt disappears when I sit down! It's just one of those days where that should be funny but I want to scream at the randomness. :grouphug: :grouphug: I've been feeling like this a lot lately, and I am not even pregnant. Seriously? You guys need to eat a real meal three freaking times a day? And yeah, they've been pretty good today, but they are here! And I cant go to the bathroom with out someone hollaring for me, or escape to the clothesline without someone finding me to tattle on someone else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 Throw a big bag of Cheetos to the far end of the yard. Lock the door quickly. Scotch tape - kids this age tend to LOVE tape for some reason. Toss some paper, scrap craft items, and plenty of Scotch tape on the table. Let them use as much as they want, and they'll be occupied for a good long time. Bonus: it's hilarious to watch them struggle to rip off the tape, and then to keep it from sticking all over themselves. If you've overused screen time, move on to junk food. Toss some old cups and bowls outside, and turn on the hose. Let ds go outside without shoes OR clothes. Who cares? Well, assuming you have a fence. Hire a sitter. If you can't afford a sitter, hire an older child to be a mother's helper (ie, keep them occupied and in a different room). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GSOchristie Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 The pool! When I was pregnant with Jax, I took Asher to the pool every day. I stuck him in a puddle jumper and let him have free range of the pool while floated around. Will she watch movies? We go to the movies at the theater one day a week for $1.00. I have instituted crying jail this summer. If you whine/cry, you get one warning, after that you get to spend time in your bed, AKA crying jail. I don't really care if they are learning anything from the experience, I just don't have to hear the whining anymore :). My three year old is a chronic whiner/complainer, I just send send him away from me because it's like nails on a chalkboard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbecueMom Posted June 22, 2013 Author Share Posted June 22, 2013 The pool! When I was pregnant with Jax, I took Asher to the pool every day. I stuck him in a puddle jumper and let him have free range of the pool while floated around. Will she watch movies? We go to the movies at the theater one day a week for $1.00. I have instituted crying jail this summer. If you whine/cry, you get one warning, after that you get to spend time in your bed, AKA crying jail. I don't really care if they are learning anything from the experience, I just don't have to hear the whining anymore :). My three year old is a chronic whiner/complainer, I just send send him away from me because it's like nails on a chalkboard. I have two boys (almost 5 and 3). Again, I can't take them to the pool on my own. DS3 only wants to run around the edge and DS4 clings on to me for dear life. They aren't really afraid of the water, just other kids in the water. Plus it costs money to go to the pool and groceries, the auto repair shop, and Lowe's have eaten up every last penny so far this summer. I think I was a little misunderstood in this thread. I really didn't need ideas on stuff for the kids to do, more like how to get myself over that feeling of, "I'm sick of parenting small kids." Yeah, I can find stuff for them to do, but I'm still Mom, The Great and Magnificent and Always On Call. That's the part I'm struggling with some days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A home for their hearts Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 I think I was a little misunderstood in this thread. I really didn't need ideas on stuff for the kids to do, more like how to get myself over that feeling of, "I'm sick of parenting small kids." Yeah, I can find stuff for them to do, but I'm still Mom, The Great and Magnificent and Always On Call. That's the part I'm struggling with some days. I'm in the same boat as you. However my little ones don't always play nicely together and are very whiny so I have that on top of them being here 24/7. I've been on complete burn out for a few weeks. I'm 25 weeks pregnant and don't have the energy or motivation for anything beside sitting and watching tv. I feel your pain. As soon as I figure it out, I'll let you know. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted June 22, 2013 Share Posted June 22, 2013 I have two boys (almost 5 and 3). Again, I can't take them to the pool on my own. DS3 only wants to run around the edge and DS4 clings on to me for dear life. They aren't really afraid of the water, just other kids in the water. Plus it costs money to go to the pool and groceries, the auto repair shop, and Lowe's have eaten up every last penny so far this summer. I think I was a little misunderstood in this thread. I really didn't need ideas on stuff for the kids to do, more like how to get myself over that feeling of, "I'm sick of parenting small kids." Yeah, I can find stuff for them to do, but I'm still Mom, The Great and Magnificent and Always On Call. That's the part I'm struggling with some days. Oh honey, (((hugs))) That is the part of parenting that no well organized phamplet, word of wisdom from women who have been there done that, or amount of observation of other families can truly prepare you for. Some things I found that worked for me when I found myself in that funk were: -focusing with all my energy on the positive -putting on the "calm mom who will not be needing or causing need for therapy" persona or faking it. -doing the centering I talked about upthread (which for me had spiritual components, but need not for you if you don't care for that.) -reminding myself daily, or hourly, (sometimes even more frequently), that these little people in my care were my charges for a very brief moment. Their need for my assistance with their every bodily function and flight of fancy would end eventually. -making elaborate lists of all of the positive moments, endearing personality traits of the kids, and milestones/goals we had reached since thier birth as a way of encouraging myself Little kids can be rough on your sense of autonomy. Pregnancy hormones can make you feel like you are a bubble off center to start with. The two things together could make anyone's halo get a little crooked. Hang tough, this too shall pass. And then you will get a bit down the road and find yourself in another phase that boggles the mind and makes you want to hide behind the locked bathroom door FOREVER. (Or at least until they move out. :) ) But you will have the benefit of knowing you are going to make it. You will be able to draw from this time the strength to walk through that one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyJoy Posted June 23, 2013 Share Posted June 23, 2013 I hear you! I'm 34 weeks pregnant and have a 3-year-old boy who talks non-stop and wants me to play with him constantly. Having to find/prepare meals annoys me for no good reason right now. And then he's probably going through a growth spurt because he keeps asking for more! Let's just say he's eaten more SpaghettiOs this month than he did in his first 3.5 years...At least we haven't had any poopy accidents for a few weeks. I don't have any solutions but I'll commiserate with you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicMom Posted June 23, 2013 Share Posted June 23, 2013 I am exhausted and my husband is on a 48 hour shift and it is too hot and sticky to play outside. DS3 enertained himself by painting the dining room walls with red nail polish and then pinched my hips and told me he loves squeezing my fat. Meanwhile DD1 managed to open a bag of flour and dump it all herself and the kitchen. Fortunately for us all there are no local orphanges. I have no answers, just sympathy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted June 23, 2013 Share Posted June 23, 2013 Ah, okay. Once I try all the positive thinking stuff others have mentioned, I just remind myself that there are few jobs you don't get tired of sometimes. It's not like dh is singing songs and dancing his way to work, kwim? He doesn't always like his job, but he needs to do it. I don't always like my job, but I need to do it. Overall, I feel the joy and importance of motherhood. Some days? I just grit my teeth and git-'er-done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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