BakersDozen Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 My oldest dd is spending a week with my mom for the first time since she was very little. I miss my dd so much I've cried every day. This is a very good thing considering last year I didn't miss her one day out of the 6 weeks she was on a huge road trip with friends (our relationship was very strained). I just got an email with a photo of my dd driving my mom's car. I want to cry. This should be my honor, my privilege of teaching my dd to drive. She is my firstborn and I covet these experiences. She has been working on getting her permit (doesn't have it yet) and I couldn't wait until she got back next week to take her, to celebrate this next stage of life with her. I feel bumped aside, if that makes sense. She's having fun, she is my mom's favorite grandchild and I know they are having a blast, but I feel left out and unneeded. I should get over it, right? 10 more kids and I'll be begging someone to please just teach them to drive so I don't have to, right?? :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 I am sure your mother didn't do this for her own selfish desires or to slight you. Yes, you should get over it.:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 It always bothers me when a grandparent takes a moment that I was looking forward to having with any of the children. So I completely understand. I think the grandparent gets excited and forgets that the parent loves the child as much as they do. :glare: But, try to forgive and forget if you can. It's not always easy. Just be sure you are the one to take DD to get her actual license in a year. You can keep that memory all to your self. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alisoncooks Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 It always bothers me when a grandparent takes a moment that I was looking forward to having with any of the children. So I completely understand. I think the grandparent gets excited and forgets that the parent loves the child as much as they do. :iagree: When my oldest DD was 6 months old, she was strictly breast-fed. It was around Christmas and we were specifically waiting until after the holidays to intro. food so that we could have that special 1st experience (and be more able to monitor/refuse food offered her.) Well, lo' and behold, I walk into the kitchen to find my dad (and all my aunts & uncles) giving her a first bite of food. I wasn't even there. I was PO'd, to say the least. So...I feel your pain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3browneyedboys4me Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 I think you are just emotional which is certainly normal under the circumstances. I would be sad too, but I would be very happy for the joy my child was having. It's hard letting go...even with the little things. My son went to summer camp this summer for the first time ever. He is fourteen! I was a wreck! :-/ He came back with a whole host of new experiences that I didn't have with him or even see! It was really weird...but, he was so happy. So, that made me happy! :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThisIsTheDay Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 I should get over it, right? Well . . . yes. Your dd has a million wonderful memories with you. This is one of the very few it sounds like she'll have with her grandma. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scrapbabe Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 I wouldn't be upset. I never had grandparents who cared about me, so I am always thrilled when my kids experience "moments" with my parents. I would treasure the thought that my son (don't have a daughter) was doing something to strengthen his relationship with his grandparents. I understand the being sad about missing it, but I wouldn't be upset. Those relationships are so important too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BakersDozen Posted July 9, 2012 Author Share Posted July 9, 2012 He came back with a whole host of new experiences that I didn't have with him or even see! This describes the last year for me and you are right, it is weird and I don't really like it. I'm happy for my dd but wow, this part of parenting is hard!! I'll get over it. I knew going through things like this with my firstborn was going to be hard (I still have the hardest time with her bday every year) but never thought it would be this hard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 I wouldn't be upset. I never had grandparents who cared about me, so I am always thrilled when my kids experience "moments" with my parents. I would treasure the thought that my son (don't have a daughter) was doing something to strengthen his relationship with his grandparents. I understand the being sad about missing it, but I wouldn't be upset. Those relationships are so important too. :iagree: I really missed having a grandparent that cared about me. Neither set was in a position to do that. God saw fit to have my ds born on my mom's birthday. I had to relent and let her have half ownership.:tongue_smilie: Even at 14, they are best buddies. Half the reason we moved back was so he could be around them in their latter years. there are plenty of experiences one can have as a teen with their parents, ones with grandparents will hold a special place too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelly1730 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 When my twins were toddlers we left them with my mother for a weekend and when we came back to get them, she had cut their hair!:glare: I couldn't believe it! These were my last babies and I wasn't emotionally ready to give them their first hair cut yet. I wanted to cry. and yell at her. and cry. But I sucked it up; complained to my husband and never said anything to her. I have to think she didn't really understand that what she did was hurtful to me. She may have thought she was being helpful.:tongue_smilie: All that to say, I understand your feelings. Your mother is probably not doing this to be hurtful to you and now as a mimi of 5, I am very careful of overstepping my bounds with the dgc. If in doubt, I always ask their parents. Lesson learned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bambam Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Question: Can your daughter legally drive an automobile without her permit? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Both of my kids have already had their first driving experience...with Grandpa (my dad). He's taught them how to drive the lawn tractor (PTO turned off), and the truck in the field (they sit on his knee and steer, just like I did around their age), and I think they both got to steer the big 4x4 tractor, too. I wasn't there, but they'll always have these treasured memories of time with Grandpa and doing stuff that "Mom would never let them do". ;) I love that they get to have these experiences just like I did with my grandparents when I was young. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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