Any tricks for getting kids to clean . . . willingly

[KristenR]

or even just without complaint? I've tried music and even resorted to yelling.

 

My girls turn on one another the minute I say "Time to clean."

Arguing, fighting, hitting, procrastinating...

 

Is it just that they are young or is there some way I can be making this less painful all around?

[AdventureMoms]

I haven't figured it out yet, so I'm mostly posting to subscribe.

 

I'm setting up a schedule though, and I think that will help. DD does better if she can see 9am is cleanup time, then we get to go outside. Also for this age group I think it has to be done all together. If I assign her a chore and walk away it's pointless. If we both pick up together or dust together or sort laundry together it helps.

 

If the tv is an option during chore time, she'll take it, so I have to make it not an option...

[applethyme]

When we are unmotivated to clean I set the kitchen timer for 15 or 30 minutes. We clean as much as we can in that time. Its a race to see who can do more with stickers for the winners. Then I set the timer for the same amount of time to do fun stuff as a reward for the work. We repeat this as often as necessary. This is also how I tackle big cleaning projects.

[Night Elf]

I always worked with my kids rather than sending them off to do something independently. I guess it seemed like less of a chore if mom was doing it too. You could also just tell them that chores are not an option but maybe they can pick which ones they like to do. My youngest dd thought sweeping was the bomb. My son always enjoyed vacuuming. They both liked to clean the windows. We even washed dishes by hand sometimes just because they both liked to play in the soapy water. We all worked together to clean up toys. They liked the "let's see how fast we can put these toys away in the right place' game. I had to train them not to just toss toys across the room. :tongue_smilie:

 

FWIW, I never had specifically assigned chores for the kids. I just always said 'Please help me do this so I can play too.' And my oldest dd still just spontaneously cleans because she enjoys helping. She had assigned chores at her dad's house while her stepmom and dad sat in the living room watching tv. She hated it. She told me she didn't mind helping me because it was helping and not being a slave. I found that rather sad.

[Rebel Yell]

Know your children.

 

I have one that works very well with a list and a deadline. I joke that I can get her to do anything if I just out it on her daily list. She hates to be nagged and reminded, and likes to work alone. For example, she would rather wash all of the dishes by herself after the kitchen is empty than was just plates/bowls while another sister puts away leftovers.

 

One of mine prefers to work with a group, or at least one other person. She will do ANYTHING as long as there's company. Drives the child in the example above nuts. :D

 

Another child needs verbal reminders, and only one job at a time. A long list seems overwhelming, even if there are really only about 20 minutes (total) of jobs on it. She also has to check in with me before she moves on to the next job- her idea of complete and mine are very different.

 

Anyway, I don't expect them to do cartwheels and write poetry about their love of cleaning, but I don't allow grumbling. I do allow them to trade jobs IF all of them agree. one child actually likes to clean the bathroom, another likes washing dishes. As long as the bathroom is clean and the dishes get done, I'm happy.

[Whereneverever]

or even just without complaint? I've tried music and even resorted to yelling.

 

My girls turn on one another the minute I say "Time to clean."

Arguing, fighting, hitting, procrastinating...

 

Is it just that they are young or is there some way I can be making this less painful all around?

 

Some of it is age. Are you right there with them picking up, or do you tell them to do it?

[chepyl]

I set a timer and make it a race to see who can.pick up the most in that time, or I give them a number of toys to pick up. It does not get completely clean in one try, but it got the playroom clean in a couple of days.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Today we are going to have a cleaning party! First we do Rock-Paper-Scissors to find out who gets first dibs at choosing music. We make up an order before we start. Then we get the timer. We have a rotation-

Person who gets to choose music cleans X (sometimes a room or sometimes an area of a room)

Person B cleans Y.

Person C cleans Z.

 

Then we put the timer on for 15 minutes and clean with Person A's music. In 15 minutes we rotate so that someone else gets to choose the music and their cleaning station is changed too so that things don't get boring.

 

My kids like cleaning parties! (We usually stop after 1 hour.)

[KristenR]

Today we are going to have a cleaning party! First we do Rock-Paper-Scissors to find out who gets first dibs at choosing music. We make up an order before we start. Then we get the timer. We have a rotation-

Person who gets to choose music cleans X (sometimes a room or sometimes an area of a room)

Person B cleans Y.

Person C cleans Z.

 

Then we put the timer on for 15 minutes and clean with Person A's music. In 15 minutes we rotate so that someone else gets to choose the music and their cleaning station is changed too so that things don't get boring.

 

My kids like cleaning parties! (We usually stop after 1 hour.)

 

 

Gerat ideas everyone. I really like the timer idea. Yes, I am normally in there cleaning with them since they are so young. But I think I will try Jean in NewCastle's idea next. Maybe I will just set the timer so they are rotating every 5 minutes instead of 15. We can work up to larger blocks of time. Thanks!!

[mommymonster]

For cleaning bedrooms with my DS6 and DS3, I find that giving discreet tasks in the same order, every time, helps. If I say, "Clean your rooms," they just stare at me like I have three heads. But the steps keep them more organized. DS6 has finally memorized the steps and I only have to remind him 10 times instead of 100 times... In any case, I set a timer for 10 minutes (they don't have cleaning stamina...). Then they use the following steps: (1) pick up dirty clothes; (2) pick up books; (3) pick up toys; (4) pick up trash; and (5) make beds.

 

For cleaning the house (generally), squirt bottles and tools that can double as weapons are very, very popular... For laundry, they get to toss the dirty laundry down the stairs. My DH or I try to walk in their way so they can "bomb" us with the clothes ... hilarious for them. every. time. :lol:

[EducationX2]

For my DD, I've found that when she's reluctant to clean, there are two ways to get her to willingly clean. One is for us to clean together. She is definitely more willing to clean when we do it together. The second is for me to give her specific chores to do instead of just a general "clean up." So, "it's time to clean up all the books" or "please empty the silverware from the dishwasher." I'll also tell her beforehand that I have X number of chores for her to please do. She likes being able to say that she only has 4 more, or 2 more.

[Parker Martin]

Being helpful and minding one's parents is worth one star a day at our house. One star is worth a quarter when it's cashed in.

 

Cleaning is included in being helpful and minding one's parents. There is much talk about one's duty to pitch in, the importance of teamwork, and the value of an orderly home.

 

Refusal results in the loss of the star and a punishment (usually a timeout)--and then one still has to clean.

 

Cleaning nicely results in praise for diligence and self-control, general harmony, and a star at the end of the day.

 

Can't remember the last time one of the two of them failed to earn that star.

Edited June 27, 2012 by Parker Martin

[kroe1]

I've never assigned my kiddos chores. I don't even require them to make their beds.

 

The down side of that is there may be a lack of responsibility and family cooperation taught. Although this did not happen at all with the first kiddo.

 

The good side of this is I don't hear whining and complaining about chores. And when I do yell out, "can someone come grab these clothes?", the kiddos come readily to help. And I make a big deal out of thanking them for the help.

 

Don't know if this works for everyone, however. And I would never be able to do it like this if I had a big family.

 

:)

[Critterfixer]

I don't know about willingly, but my boys will clean 90% of the time without complaining.

We have basic chores that must be done every day. For my eight year olds this means getting dressed on their own, making their bed as neatly as they can manage, picking up their room daily and cleaning up their toys from the front room daily, and cleaning up the schoolroom table after school. They also help with the animals by gathering eggs, catching grasshoppers for the chickens and feeding the dogs, and making sure that the more active dogs get time to play with a ball or run races. (My oldest calls these dog challenges.) We just got new chicks, so both will be helping with the babies as well. We try to have a number of fun chores to make the mundane more tolerable. Not all work is dull.

We have a schedule and specific work for specific days. On Monday we clean the bedrooms, so that is also the day that the boys spend about an hour doing a deep cleaning on their room (involves getting rid of broken toys, stray rocks, sticks and bugs and crawling under the bed to check for socks that might not have made it to the wash for the week.) Monday is also trash day, so one of the chores we do together is taking the trash to the road in the evenings. They love that. Play bumper cars with the cans.

 

But then, they are at an easy age for willing helpers. I haven't had to give rewards, but they know that asking Dad how they can help on the weekends usually nets them spending cash. Last weekend they helped pitch rocks out of a recently worked area.

 

Probably the last thing that I've found to be useful is praise where praise is due, and gentle reminders when things are not done up to par. I constantly must remember that I've been doing these things for a long time, and they are just learning how to pick up and clean, so they need instruction and a cheerful, patient instructor.

[lynn]

I see that your kids are very young. Do you give them specifics on what to clean and show them how? Do you work with them? I found that when my boys were little jsut saying "time to help clean the kitchen" would not motivate them but when it was a specific small task "time to wipe the counters" they responded much better because it was not so overwhelming. When it came to their room, I would tell them go put away 10 things or pick up your clothes and put them in the drawer or hamper or whatever rather than "Go clean your room"