Derailed teen.....Getting back on track....

[Mommyfaithe]

Some of you have been following the long saga of DSs battle with Lyme Disease and it's aftermath. Due to the nature of Lyme, he fell way behind....at least a full year, if not more, from where he was. He was bedridden for almost 5 months and then a slow rise back to normalcy.

 

We are not quite 100%, But he is now ready to begin some type of study program to get ready for college. His dream of swimming for a division 1 school is gone. His dream of an academic scholarship.....gone.

 

We need to face those facts and move forward......I am just not sure where the forward mark begins. I was able to build up his reading ability....starting him off with very easy books and working toward works of literature appropriate for his age. It seems his ability to write has been effected....his handwriting does not even look like his own anymore, So I would need a remedial writing program that brings him through the steps to produce a college level persuasive essay. Nothing babyish......but a nuts and bolts approach would work best with this guy.

 

He has begun to study his math again, And is able to remember and solve algebraic problems and is also re-studying his Geometry.

 

I would like for him to take the SAT in the spring....and again next fall.....and hold off on his graduation until next spring. In the meantime, I would like him to take some CC classes....maybe just 1 or 2 at a time....to build him up....next fall.

 

So, anyway, my question is....how would you go about getting a child who has been derailed, for whatever reason, Back on track for graduation and further studies?? I am sort of a deer in the headlights on this one, not wanting to stress him, yet, not wanting to let him wallow.

 

Faithe

[ZooRho]

Oh man I'm so sorry. I had a son that got sick so we are giving him 2 sophomore years. I'll just do his transcript by subject rather than years.

 

I haven't seen what all has gone on with your son, but from reading he must have some cognative issues too?

 

For his situation, I do believe most colleges would be very understanding of the situation.

 

I don't know that I would put some of the pressures of SAT and college classes on him just yet. But only you really know what he is ready for.

 

How is he felling about things. My son was totally relieved when we decided to hold him back. In reality he probably only needed a semester, but he too is a swimmer so the extra year may make a difference. That wasn't the reason but helped make it easier.

 

Man my heart just hurts for you and your son

[Osmosis Mom]

Yes, I am very sorry also, but glad to hear he is feeling better.

 

I would take it slow and probably wait with thoughts of SAT for now. You know, in Europe kids graduate from high school at age 19, so don't sweat the time pent (and lost) too much. He'll need a period of adjustment, but then will probably need less time to work since he is older and more mature and focused.

 

Not sure how Lyme's affects learning abilities. His writing is off now because he is out of shape. Keep things in perspective, don't get hit by minor things that are not so important. His health and emotional state come first.

[Mommyfaithe]

Thanks ....I am just so unsure with how to proceed. On the one hand, I want to give him the time he needs. On the other hand, I don't want him to get into a rut of not pushing himself at all. I feel like I am on a tight rope and need to walk just so....

 

Yes, I believe there were cognitive issues. The doctors however, are blaming him...saying he is lazy...or saying he is depressed. He is neither. And reaching out for help has just been responded to with a smack upside our heads.

 

He is frustrated. I am frustrated.....but, we both agree that we need to start moving forward...baby steps at a time.

 

Any advice on which those steps should be, would be greatly coveted.

 

Faithe

[trailofsparks]

I am sorry for your losses and your son's losses. Just a thought.... When and how you decide to move forward will be met with greater success if you each take the time you need to grieve these losses. The grief stages are so integral to the restoration process.

[Susan C.]

Faithe,

I have a few thoughts, you'll know if they are a good solution. I would try to locate where he is at knowledge wise in the subjects that matter. In math, where ever he is at, even if you have to go back to basic math, that is where I would start up. You only have to get to about Algebra 2 level to take it at CC. History and science tend to be forgotten, and he will take them again at CC so I wouldn't worry about those except to get credits needed for graduation. For history and literature, he can read (or you can read to him) and the two of you can discuss it to see that he understands everything he needs to. I would be tempted to use a literature text with pieces of different literature and time period information, and tie it to his history. I would let him type everything (that is what he will be doing in college anyway) while his handwriting improves. Your discussions will get him ready to write again. When you see that he can write some, start with short assignments, you can even offer to let him dictate while you type if that helps. For science, the lower level 101 classes at CC don't need much previous knowledge, and I would be tempted to wait on those until he is ready to go to CC. English 101 is pretty basic as well and would be a good place to start when he is ready. I would pick the easiest and shortest curriculum that you can use for high school. My focus would be getting him to the point that he can handle the classes at CC, then either dual enroll him at CC or graduate him to CC.

 

He would still have opportunity for scholarships if he does well at CC. If he is feeling up to it, he could get his general education out of the way, get an associates degree, then apply to where he wants to go as a junior.

 

I have read on health forums the challenges you face with Lyme. It is no small deal. My heart goes out to both of you.

[ZooRho]

Okay so what "grade" is he in? What do you think he needs to graduate?

 

What does he want to do? It seems like you think his direction may have changed for his future, so what do you see, what does he want?

 

I like Susan's ideas too.

 

My youngest is not a reader. So we have spent tons of time watching documentaries and movies covering the 20th century our study for this year.

[Mommyfaithe]

Ooooh. The hard questions....sigh.

Yes, his future has changed. There is no question there. He needs to relearn some of his math, but seems to be eager to do that. He also loves to read...and is finally able to read hard books again. I think his ability to write was somewhat effected. I think I need to reteach him from step one...copy work, dictation...outlines and summarizing....working up to essays.

 

Right now...I think our goal is taking some college classes....getting back into some kind of social team or sport, relearning HOW to enjoy himself and being a teenager for a while. He missed out on almost 2 years getting better. I want him to be happy....and healthy.....and find new dreams.

 

I am not into rushing him, but I also don't want him to get stuck in a rut, and I don't want to see him give up.

 

Faithe

[ZooRho]

Ooooh. The hard questions....sigh.

Yes, his future has changed. There is no question there. He needs to relearn some of his math, but seems to be eager to do that. He also loves to read...and is finally able to read hard books again. I think his ability to write was somewhat effected. I think I need to reteach him from step one...copy work, dictation...outlines and summarizing....working up to essays.

 

Right now...I think our goal is taking some college classes....getting back into some kind of social team or sport, relearning HOW to enjoy himself and being a teenager for a while. He missed out on almost 2 years getting better. I want him to be happy....and healthy.....and find new dreams.

 

I am not into rushing him, but I also don't want him to get stuck in a rut, and I don't want to see him give up.

 

Faithe

 

That sounds really good.

 

I would sit with him and work out a plan too, reminding him it is fluid too. Things may need to be reworked as you both learn things.

 

Honestly I'm so thankful I gave my son this extra year. Sounds like that is what yours needs too.

[Mommyfaithe]

That sounds really good.

 

I would sit with him and work out a plan too, reminding him it is fluid too. Things may need to be reworked as you both learn things.

 

Honestly I'm so thankful I gave my son this extra year. Sounds like that is what yours needs too.

 

An extra year...or so...would be great for him. He is in 12th grade....and he finished most of his high school credit young...before he got sick. He was on track to begin college at 16. That, obviously didn't happen. Now, I am not really concentrating on grade....just concentrating on him getting his life back....and him fighting hard to give himself a good life.

 

Flexibilty is going to be key....but, I am still not exactly sure HOW to remediate or assess where he is at....and how much he can really handle. I am thinking of a neuropsyche evaluation by a LLMD and also, I know a very homeschool friendly specialist who screens kids for learning dusabilities/dyslexia. I may give her a call....explain the situation and get her recommendations.....

 

Hmmmmmmmmm......

Faithe

[ZooRho]

An extra year...or so...would be great for him. He is in 12th grade....and he finished most of his high school credit young...before he got sick. He was on track to begin college at 16. That, obviously didn't happen. Now, I am not really concentrating on grade....just concentrating on him getting his life back....and him fighting hard to give himself a good life.

 

Flexibilty is going to be key....but, I am still not exactly sure HOW to remediate or assess where he is at....and how much he can really handle. I am thinking of a neuropsyche evaluation by a LLMD and also, I know a very homeschool friendly specialist who screens kids for learning dusabilities/dyslexia. I may give her a call....explain the situation and get her recommendations.....

 

Hmmmmmmmmm......

Faithe

That sounds good. on the eval.

There is also a test, and honestly I'm not sure how it would work for someone like him but it is the Woodcock-Johnson. I did it with my oldest when he was much younger but I wonder if something like it would help find some areas where he may be struggling. The lady who did our's was familar with hsing and curriculum so she suggested stuff for us to use.

 

 

And on grade I guess I wasn't sure if he was a "senior", I'm sure that is playing so much into things. I'm not sure if depression wouldn't be a part of it too.

[Starr]

I would work with the evaluation as well. Maybe go back to some middle school,early high school, level work and see how it goes. Read something, write a short answer, write a page, etc. He needs to process a lot of information in a short time for college classes. I would only take one or two to start with so he has plenty of time to do well.

 

Both of you can be encouraged that he's ready to start again. Get the help you need, from the people who will listen.

 

:grouphug:

[Tokyomarie]

That sounds good. on the eval.

There is also a test, and honestly I'm not sure how it would work for someone like him but it is the Woodcock-Johnson. I did it with my oldest when he was much younger but I wonder if something like it would help find some areas where he may be struggling. The lady who did our's was familar with hsing and curriculum so she suggested stuff for us to use.

 

 

And on grade I guess I wasn't sure if he was a "senior", I'm sure that is playing so much into things. I'm not sure if depression wouldn't be a part of it too.

 

The Woodcock-Johnson Achievement tests were part of the full neuropsychological assessment that my son had (not for Lyme). He also had a standard IQ test. But the part of the np eval that is most helpful is all the executive function & other cognitive processing tests they do which help to pinpoint the strengths and weaknesses in different kinds of memory tasks, visual & auditory processing tasks, etc. As a for instance, I learned that my son learns material far better when it is presented as a connected narrative and quite poorly when presented as lists or seemingly unconnected bits of information. I understand better why literature-based history is a good choice for him, while he has never been able to fully memorize the 12 months of the year in their proper order.

 

In Lyme Disease, executive function (things like planning, organization, initiating, etc) & other cognitive processing (especially short-term & working memory) suffer the most. These things will be picked up on a full neuropsych eval.

[elegantlion]

:grouphug:

 

Have you looked into WWS for his writing? It might work. My ds does not find it babyish at all. It speaks to the student. I like the gentle progressive instruction.

[Greta Lea]

Reading, discussing and then simple written narrations about what he's reading.

 

You know, you might even want to choose a classic that he's read in years past to reread.

 

You might try some living books for his science to help him review. He might find it helpful to read Science Matters. Six Easy Pieces might be another good one.

 

Also, reading some biographies and autobiographies about people who have overcome hardships and went on to do great things in their life might really be the inspiration he's needing. Up From Slaverly is the book that poppped in my head first.

[TeacherZee]

I like the look of SWB's new writing curriculum for the middle grades. It doesn't seem babyish to me. http://www.welltrainedmind.com/store/wws-student-1.html And it looks like you could do it at whatever speed suits your DS

[TGHEALTHYMOM]

:grouphug: First of all, Hugs, you are such a caring mother.

What a terrible thing to go through, and I do understand. I myself have had Lyme Disease 2 times in 9 years, but thankfully the first time antibiotics kicked it and I got diagnosed quickly. The second time, the DR. Office was closed, the Urgent care was out to lunch, so I went to the Health food store and got OLIVE LEAFE EXTRACT which I had used before to treat a Major Sinus infection and just for good immunity one Winter. I felt better within 1 day, and kept feeling better. I got the LIQUID kind that time and have continued to take it off and on and when I feel bad. It really does work.

I also believe strongly in Probiotics *pills or from fermented foods.

The Cook book I have been using that is healing my gut is Nourishing Traditions. Kombucha is a drink that comes in different flavors and I like them all so far. I can't make everything it is too time consuming.

 

I want your son to feel better and he may be a little depressed, but I think if he feels a lot better physically, he will be better off in every aspect.

 

I also take Cod Liver oil in the winter and Fish oil in the summer and eat Wild caught Salmon, Wild caught Cod, and some wild tuna and sardines. These have Omega 3 in them to help the brain, COD oil is best in winter months when sunlight is not adequate for vitamin D. Sublingual Vitam B is helpful too for energy. Cutting way down on sugar and caffiene is a must for me too, since caffeine takes B vitamins out of the body and sugar is an anti-nutrient.

 

I am just sharing what has helped me, and pray for you to know what to do to help your son.

Edited February 19, 2012 by TGHEALTHYMOM

[memphispeg]

Sunshine, fresh air, good food, exercise, hugs, and student-directed learning? Help him re-locate his passions. It may be hard but, be supportive and enthusiastic. Best best best of luck to you both.

[Mommyfaithe]

:grouphug: First of all, Hugs, you are such a caring mother.

What a terrible thing to go through, and I do understand. I myself have had Lyme Disease 2 times in 9 years, but thankfully the first time antibiotics kicked it and I got diagnosed quickly. The second time, the DR. Office was closed, the Urgent care was out to lunch, so I went to the Health food store and got OLIVE LEAFE EXTRACT which I had used before to treat a Major Sinus infection and just for good immunity one Winter. I felt better within 1 day, and kept feeling better. I got the LIQUID kind that time and have continued to take it off and on and when I feel bad. It really does work.

I also believe strongly in Probiotics *pills or from fermented foods.

The Cook book I have been using that is healing my gut is Nourishing Traditions. Kombucha is a drink that comes in different flavors and I like them all so far. I can't make everything it is too time consuming.

 

I want your son to feel better and he may be a little depressed, but I think if he feels a lot better physically, he will be better off in every aspect.

 

I also take Cod Liver oil in the winter and Fish oil in the summer and eat Wild caught Salmon, Wild caught Cod, and some wild tuna and sardines. These have Omega 3 in them to help the brain, COD oil is best in winter months when sunlight is not adequate for vitamin D.

 

I am just sharing what has helped me, and pray for you to know what to do to help your son.

 

Thank you SO MUCH for your post. My ds is feeling SO much better, which is why we are beginning to refocus on academics. I do give him Fish Oil, lots of good fresh food, a pro-biotic, some supplements...such as B6 and phosphitydal serine complex....and cats claw for joint pain. He also takes a Superfood/protein shake every day and he juices wheatgrass....He is not depressed, but has shown frustration with the medical people we have seen...and I don't blame him.

 

Right now he is feeling better than he has in years...seriously. He has begun, of all things, kick boxing....doing some weight lifting, and really working out again. He just completed building an addition onto our house ( with dh, but he did most of the work:D). He is finally going out with friends...reading books, listening to music....being a teenager! It is wonderful.

 

I am definitely going to order some olive leaf extract....

 

I am so glad you are feeling well. Lyme is a bear.

Faithe

[Mommyfaithe]

So I think I have a handle on how I am going to approach writing with ds.

 

Step 1.....

Copy work.....daily, until he can fluently write 2 full pages...no mistakes...in less than 10 minutes...this is to strengthen his hand back up....and remind his brain about capitalization, punctuation, spelling, sentence structure...etc.

 

Dictation....to be added in after a couple of weeks....and done on opposite days of copy work...working up to 3-6 memorized sentences at a time...after 2 readings. This is to re-learn keeping sentences, grammar, punctuation in his brain while getting it down on paper.

 

Outlining/summarizing.....from articles, textbooks, encyclopedia....we will move onto this when dictation exercises become fluid. we will move from easier to harder source documents...then outlining/summarizing from more than one resource and writing a more complicated summary.

 

When these summaries become fluent, I plan to move onto reteaching the different essay types....including 5 paragraph essays....expository, persuasive, compare/contrast, etc.

I will also reintroduce literary response essays and written narrations in math and science.

 

Seeing as these were all skills he has already possessed, I do not think it will take too long to move through these steps.

 

I will probably buy WWS and work through some of those exercises with him...in will need it for my boys in a year or so anyway......

 

Once we have these basic building blocks back down, I will probably sign him up for a CC English 101.... And work it with him....

 

So, any comments or suggestions on this plan?

 

Thanks for helping me work this all out....and for the outpouring of prayers and positive thoughts for my ds. It means so much to us!

 

Faithe

[ZooRho]

I think that sounds like a good idea.

 

He can move as quick or slow that he needs to do.

[justamouse]

:crying:

 

Poor guy.

[flyingiguana]

Find something he wants to do and focus on that at first. Skills will come back faster if he's engaged in something interesting.

 

I was similarly sick at that age. It helped not to worry so much about "the future" -- just work at my own pace and get to where I was going when I was ready.

 

I read a lot, for starters, then got back into other things as time progressed.

[Mama Geek]

Not a whole lot of advice to offer but maybe just some encouragement. When I was in high school my best friend's older brother was in a bad car wreck that changed his life. He isn't doing what he had planned, but he has gone on to have a successful career that included community college. It sounds like your son will be able to do the same with some hard work and patience.

[Mommyfaithe]

Not a whole lot of advice to offer but maybe just some encouragement. When I was in high school my best friend's older brother was in a bad car wreck that changed his life. He isn't doing what he had planned, but he has gone on to have a successful career that included community college. It sounds like your son will be able to do the same with some hard work and patience.

 

I hope so.....he doesn't mind hard work.....but his patience can be lacking.....

 

Today, he has been holed up in his room studying geometry.....because he is finally GETTING it again.

 

I am feeling encouraged.....finally!

 

Faithe

[Mommyfaithe]

Reading, discussing and then simple written narrations about what he's reading.

 

You know, you might even want to choose a classic that he's read in years past to reread.

 

You might try some living books for his science to help him review. He might find it helpful to read Science Matters. Six Easy Pieces might be another good one.

 

Also, reading some biographies and autobiographies about people who have overcome hardships and went on to do great things in their life might really be the inspiration he's needing. Up From Slaverly is the book that poppped in my head first.

 

Thanks Greta.....great suggestions :D

Faithe