jenniferlee Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 I would love to have my 5 and 7 yo in bed by 8:00 (or earlier)but I have 3 older kids still up and around until 9 at least. The littles bedroom is right off the hallway, there is no way to put them to bed in any meaningful way. I mean, they could be in their room, but they wouldn't be sleeping with the house so awake still. Does anyone have any good ideas for dealing with this? It bothers me because I think they could use more sleep. Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
higginszoo Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 We've found that staggered bedtimes have helped different-aged roommates settle in. We also don't have elaborate bedtime routines, so there's not a big chance of waking sleeping siblings. The older three went to bed at the same time from about 8 mo (when we quit the evening top-off for each baby) until they were 10. That time varied from 7 to 8 o'clock. When they were 10, their bedtimes got bumped back to 9, so for a while, they were staggered. (Now the boys are old enough that actually going asleep isn't a big deal, they've learned to value sleep.) The little one has always been an early riser, a bad sleeper, and gave up naps early. We've tried to bump her bedtime back to 8 a few times because the older dc have activities that don't end until then, and it would be more convenient, but her behavior always tanks when we do that ... her wakeup time never moves back any. We'll probably try again when she turns 7 next month. At 14 or 15, we may allow the dc more discretion on bedtime, but we haven't gotten to that yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 When our boys were about the same ages as your dc, we found it easier to put them to bed at the same time and let ds2 sleep in a bit longer. Now that they're older (teens) and put themselves to bed at a late hour I do put dd to bed at 9-9:30. (She's quite a bit younger than they are.) It actually works well for us that the boys are still awake because dd likes knowing people are around. They're usually in the next room using the computer and their presence helps her fall asleep. My experience probably doesn't help you at all. I have a friend who lets her dd go to bed late--after 10pm. She also has a big age gap between her youngest and the older dc. She liked giving her dd a late bedtime and letting her sleep in as it gave them more family time after her dh got home from work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarreymere Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 (edited) I've never had bedtimes for mine. We've never made an issue of it and I've never thought it was something I wanted to get into the habit of enforcing. They are usually all asleep by 9 pm. I just wake 'em all up at a certain time. They go to sleep on their own when they get tired. They know not to get into anything they aren't supposed to get into. If we want to be alone we go into our bedroom and shut the door. I think it helps if you have a cut-off time for screen time. After 8pm the only activity going on is reading or playing quietly, so the kids don't get 'into' a video game or tv show. I think that makes them more likely to lay down when they get tired since they know they won't be missing any entertainment. If you think your youngers could use more sleep you could let them sleep a bit longer in the morning. Really, the bedtime thing can turn into such a battle. Edited to add: We only have one tv, in the living room. We don't allow computers or video game toys or anything like that in the bedrooms. Even ours. Edited January 20, 2012 by Rainefox Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura in MI Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 (edited) We start ds3.75 and ds5 bedtime routine at 8:30 and they're usually asleep by 9:45 (that includes a bath, story time,etc) . Dss's 7 & 9 get ready for bed at the same time and after were done getting the little's to sleep. Dh goes in their room and tells them goodnight and turns off their tv which around 9:45. The teens have to go to their room at 10, Usually they're in bed and asleep earlier then that though. They have everything in their rooms anyways. It's lights out at 11 (11:30 for ds17). ETA: Forgot to say we have a tot clock, that blocks out most noise. And our older ones have to stay quiet. (they're usually in bed anyways) Edited January 20, 2012 by Laura in MI Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 Hmmm.... Our littles go to bed at 7-ish. The younger two have been going right before 7 and the next two more like 7:15. We have a special thing we do some nights which is one on one. In that case, the 4yr old goes last because he really needs to stay up the latest. Our new one goes to bed at 8:30. My teens whenever they please (usually sometime between 10 and 2...now that they are working, it tends towards the 10-12 side of that). Hubby and I go to bed between 9:30 and 11, usually sometime just after 10. We are reasonably quiet for about 30 minutes after bedtime so the kids can get to sleep. After that, we relax more and don't worry about male voices, giggling, etc. Additionally, the kids have noise in their rooms. Currently, there is a fan in the girls' room. The boys have a tot-clock which plays music for a time then has white noise the rest of the night. Unless the 10yr old wants the fan in there, I'll probably put it back in with the boys soon. Anyway, does that help at all? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 Hmmm.... Our littles go to bed at 7-ish. The younger two have been going right before 7 and the next two more like 7:15. We have a special thing we do some nights which is one on one. In that case, the 4yr old goes last because he really needs to stay up the latest. Our new one goes to bed at 8:30. My teens whenever they please (usually sometime between 10 and 2...now that they are working, it tends towards the 10-12 side of that). Hubby and I go to bed between 9:30 and 11, usually sometime just after 10. We are reasonably quiet for about 30 minutes after bedtime so the kids can get to sleep. After that, we relax more and don't worry about male voices, giggling, etc. Additionally, the kids have noise in their rooms. Currently, there is a fan in the girls' room. The boys have a tot-clock which plays music for a time then has white noise the rest of the night. Unless the 10yr old wants the fan in there, I'll probably put it back in with the boys soon. Anyway, does that help at all? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommee & Baba Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 Bedtime is 8:30pm here. I start story-time around 8pm, after teeth brushing and jammies of course. Then we all make our way to the kitchen to make ice waters for everyone. Everyone gets tucked into bed and the radio is turned on. My girls are usually asleep within 45 minutes of being laid down, ds can stretch it out to about an hour and half if I don't snatch him up and snuggle him up. When I snatch him up he's out in about 45 minutes as well. I don't wake my kids in the morning. They get up when they're ready. Then we begin school at the start of the new hour after waking up. I'm sure this would change if my kids didn't wake until 10am or later. However my kids are all up by 8:30am each morning. Rarely but occasionally they will stagger out at 9am. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenniferlee Posted January 22, 2012 Author Share Posted January 22, 2012 Thanks for the replies, everyone. It seems l like most of you have kids that will sleep in later to compensate for later bedtimes. That is so not the case here. 7:30 is the absolute latest they will sleep in, usually 6:30-7 is more like it. So I'm not sure what to do at this point. I'd love for them to sleep in more, but it just isn't happening. I do agree about not liking bedtime battles, which is why I currently let the little guys stay up as late as the older ones. Well, thanks anyway. Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellydon Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 All of our rooms have noise machines on high going at bedtime. The child going to bed can't hear anyone awake. We also slow the house down at night. The older kids aren't allowed to be noisy after 8:00 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
black_midori Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 I think it helps if you have a cut-off time for screen time. After 8pm the only activity going on is reading or playing quietly, so the kids don't get 'into' a video game or tv show. I think that makes them more likely to lay down when they get tired since they know they won't be missing any entertainment. I dunno - as a youngster, I often got deeply "into" books - I'd hide under the covers and read until well past midnight, tired or not. My 7yo turns out to be the same way!! I let him stay up in bed with a small light on after his 5yo bro goes to bed (they both go in at the same time and chat awhile). If I didn't come by later in the night and gently remind him to please wrap up a page and turn off the light, he'd likely be awake well into the night. As it is, he often sleeps late in the am and I have to balance getting him going with letting him stay up reading... So, I think a bedtime can be a very good thing for those of us who just can't "self-regulate" very well!! Even now as an adult, I will STILL find that I know I need to sleep, am tired enough to sleep, and then get involved in a good book and stay up way too late! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Littles bedtime is 730. Diva is btwn 830-9, special allowances have been made for up to 10, or if she's babysitting. Boo...anytime he darn well pleases for now. :tongue_smilie: Littles share a room, Diva has her own, so it's not a problem. Boo sleeps in our room. Littles are up no later than 7 am. Diva we get out of bed by 8...although I've considered the use of explosives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiegirl Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 I only have 3 and they are close in age They all go to bed at the same time (8:30 ) but my oldest reads in bed until about 10:00 and the other two read until 9:00 or so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitten18 Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 Thanks for the replies, everyone. It seems l like most of you have kids that will sleep in later to compensate for later bedtimes. That is so not the case here. 7:30 is the absolute latest they will sleep in, usually 6:30-7 is more like it. So I'm not sure what to do at this point. I'd love for them to sleep in more, but it just isn't happening. I do agree about not liking bedtime battles, which is why I currently let the little guys stay up as late as the older ones. Well, thanks anyway. Jen I have just two kids and they are 8 and 6. They sleep in the same bed and go to bed at the same time (do your littles sleep together?). We start our bedtime routine about 6:30 (pajamas, brushing teeth, going to the bathroom, etc.). I get in bed with them at about 7:00 and do our read aloud. Lights out at 7:30. We have the door closed and a noise machine on. I stay in bed with them (on my laptop) until they are asleep (never more than 15 minutes). DH is obviously still awake, but with the door closed and the noise machine on, we can't hear anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NancyNellen Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 My two smallest go to bed an hour earlier than the older three. I use a fan and a Jim Weiss story CD to block out the sounds of he older kids. However, the olders know that they need to be quiet after 8PM. They usually read or play games together. It was a struggle in the beginning when my olders began staying up later. Now everyone is used to it and know the drill...I hardly ever have a struggle any more. My kids are like yours. They do NOT sleep in, and they get grumpy when they are under-rested. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 when the little were 5 and 7, the elders were 18 and 21. we have several house rules that are there to help us all live together well. 1. mum can't sleep if anyone is up, so everyone must be in bed ntl 10pm (elders). otherwise, mum is Very Grumpy the next day ;) 2. littles won't go to sleep if there is any noise, so anyone still up when the littles go to bed must be silent..... watching tv at the other end of the house quietly, doing homework or reading in bed. 3. when in doubt, sleep takes priority over wakefulness at night, and wakefulness takes priority over sleep in the mornings.... i'm wondering what time your elders get up in the morning..... i'm thinking if they get up earlier they'll go to sleep earlier? or could you have everyone get ready for bed and go to their rooms, the elders to sketch, read, etc, etc, the littles to sleep? then everyone is ready for bed, but the elders still feel as if they have some sort of privelege.... but there won't be much need for noise, as teeth are brushed, etc, etc.... might that work? :grouphug: sleep is important and you're a good mom to be working on it! ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
extendedforecast Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 What works for us now, and my young ones are much younger than yours, so ignore if you don't find this helpful, is described below. After cleaning up after dinner, one or both littles go into the bath. (Daddy does baths) The two littles usually take turns each night in the tub, but babygirl is a little piggy at mealtimes and usually needs a bath by the end of every day. After bath, I get them ready for bed. Depending on which one looks more tired, I turn off all the lights and send the other child to daddy. I sing a few songs, nurse, cuddle, then say goodnight if he or she is not already asleep. At this point they fall asleep within 5 minutes. Then I find the other little one and read to him or her for about 10-15 minutes. Then it's time to go to bed. We co-sleep with the two youngest, so I put the child in bed and maybe nurse and cuddle, but for a couple of minutes. Then I say goodnight and the child falls asleep within 5-10 minutes. While I'm doing bedtime, everyone else knows to be quiet until I come out of my room. The little kids don't seem to care or notice that everyone else is asleep. After the littles are asleep we all do family stuff or the older girls play until their bedtimes. When I'm sure they're washed up and in bed (they sleep together in one another's rooms), I go up and read to them for about 30 minutes to an hour, depending on how tired they are, or how good the book is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 our routine is this: all 3 kids ages, 7,10 and 11 are upstairs in their beds reading by 8 (was earlier when they were a little younger)...the 7 has his lights out by8:30 then his brother with whom he shares a room with goes into our room to read until 9. Then at 9:15 the 11 has lights out. This has worked for us for years...we just have to keep adding a few more minutes as they grow...but for my husband and I, after 8:00 the kids are upstairs and quiet....so that is nice for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeidiKC Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 My younger 2 are about the age of yours. They just turned 6 and 8. They listen to a story or book on CD every single night (and it's an hour long). My goal is to get them in there at 7:00, but it's usually closer to 7:30. One or the other of them usually falls asleep before it's over, or at least they are pretty sleepy by then. Since they get to listen to a CD, they are always more than willing to get to bed. We never have any bedtime battles. They mostly choose Story of the World CDs! Check out Storynory.com - they have tons of good stuff and it's all free. I just burn several stories (maybe 4 Robin Hood stories, etc.) onto one CD. Or even better, we get books on CD from the library, so they are dying to hear what happens next in the story. Of course we try to be quiet (and their room is close to all the action) and are not running around sounding like we're having a party, but they are used to hearing us walk by or talk in quiet voices. I guess my advice would be to try the CD thing, and move their bedtime slowly back to whenever you want it to bed. And, selfishly, it is SO nice to have them in their rooms before 7:30, even if they aren't sleeping but are listening to a book on CD! And they have listened to tons of great books and stories this way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
runmiarun Posted January 23, 2012 Share Posted January 23, 2012 Our kids are 6, 4, 2, and 2 weeks away from 1. They all go to bed at 8pm. Depending on who had naps (the 2 youngest still nap every day), sometimes they will stay up reading until 8:30pm. But they all wake up between 5 and 5:30am every morning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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