What does your teen Aspie do?

[Night Elf]

This type of problem probably isn't typical of boys my son's age. I think his Aspergers is a huge part of the problem. I'm trying to find him something new to do.

 

I just posted about an erector set, but that looks like it won't work. The pieces are way too small. He has been into Lego bricks since he was 2 years old and has a 6 ft table in his room with an entire city layout. He doesn't want to touch it so he quit building. All he does is read on his computer or play video games. I just can't find anything else that doesn't look babyish. Oh well, I'll pull out the The Global Puzzle. That keeps him busy for a 2 - 3hours at least.

 

He doesn't like the outdoors and his motor skills aren't the greatest. His gait is strange and he has a difficult time running. Sports are out. Every time I suggest something, he says he isn't interested. If I find something I think is good, he'll do it, but so far I can't find anything else except more Lego sets which costs $$$$. He wants the Grand Emporium, but it's $150. Eeek! That is a Christmas gift, not a boredom relief activity.

[bzymom]

One thing that might interest him, and take him outdoors without feeling like torture, is geocaching. You can pick up a relatively inexpensive GPS for geocaching on Amazon if you watch the sales.

 

It is really tough. I feel your pain.:grouphug:

[Joyofsixreboot]

Unfortunately mine has two favorite activities~ x-box or plugging into his ipod and reading a book so it's just like he's alone :glare: Mine will participate in Boy Scouts but it's a small group and they all know him and his brother is there. Otherwise he tells me he doesn't like people and just really likes to be alone.

[happygrrl]

No help here, just sharing the pain! :D

 

Ds does like woodworking, but it also stresses him out (he gets so focused on finishing that he does not enjoy the journey).

 

Other than that it is a book, comic, or video game.

[BamaTanya]

My ds looks searching for answers to his endless questions on the internet (right now they're mythology related), reading, watching science TV shoes, and a few video games.

In the summer he enjoys playing in the pool and actually taught himself to swim. At his own pace. :D

He participates with others as little as possible. If he didn't have siblings, I wonder if he'd try to make any friends at all . . . As it is, sometimes his brother and sister drag him along on outings.

 

Good luck. :grouphug:

[AK_Mom4]

How about robotics? DS15 got involved with the Lego Robotics when younger and joined a robotics team this year. He has some sort of NXT Mindstorm robot - not cheap, but definitely uses up hours of time programming it to do things.

 

He also enjoys archery (definitely a solitary sport) and recently volunteered to run the lights for school activites (another solitary occupation, lol).

 

DS is also into music and let his sister talk him into playing in the pit orchestra for the school music. That has been quite a bit of fun for him even though it is definitly outside his comfort zone. Given his choice, he would play his trumpet alone in his room or spend all his time on the computer playing video games. He does Scouts in a small troop (DH is the troop leader).

[Karen in CO]

Don't know how you feel about magic, but the card game Magic the Gathering might be good. We have friends that play that sound similar to your son. There is a fair amount of collecting, plus game play and strategy involved. Most places have card shops that host weekly game nights too.

[Night Elf]

Oh you ladies rock! Just hearing that others are in the same situation makes me feel so much better. I mean, I know I'm not the only one with a child like this, but actually hearing someone else say it makes me feel less alone. :)

 

The idea of geocaching caught his attention. His first comment was that we don't own a GPS, but DH said getting one was no problem. So my son has been in his room for a while looking at the website. :tongue_smilie:

 

We did buy the Lego Mindstorms NXT several years ago. He had zero interest. His best friend's mom started a league, that actually won 1st place in something, but my son didn't enjoy the meetings and dropped out after only a few. He's not an electronics/computer type of person really. I mean, he uses his computer to read things online but he has no interest in the actual PC and it's components. That's too bad. I think working for Geek Squad would be way cool.

 

We are part of a Teen Aspergers group. I was the group organizer for a while and it was all boys. My son liked talking with the other guys at the group but none of them tried to contact each other outside of the meeting time. We merged with a girl's group and my son has lost interest. The group dynamics changed and he just isn't as comfortable anymore.

 

I wonder if he would have any interest in Magic. I used to have a huge set of cards that I inherited from another friend, but I gave them away because I didn't play. I'll mention that to him too.

 

I would give just about anything for him to have a friend again. We got really close to one family. The mom became my best friend and her only son was my son's best friend. We hung out together for 5 years. Then she got really busy with her own school, his homeschooling, her DH's business, and her stepson moving in. I tried so hard to maintain contact but she basically dumped us. It took my son over a year to recover from that. Even then, he had no interest in even trying to meet people until a couple of years later, basically last December. So he's been without a friend for just over 3 years. He's not especially close to his sisters. He truly does spend nearly all waking hours in his room, alone.

[elegantlion]

Don't know how you feel about magic, but the card game Magic the Gathering might be good. We have friends that play that sound similar to your son. There is a fair amount of collecting, plus game play and strategy involved. Most places have card shops that host weekly game nights too.

 

:iagree: Ds did this for a while. He was the youngest at the tournaments at age 11, but he had fun. He also made money by selling and trading cards at the game store.

 

He moved onto a new thing, right now it's Minecraft. It's a building program, like Lego, but way cooler. It's still online, but it's more productive than typical games. http://www.minecraft.net/

 

Ds has been playing for a couple of years. He still has a blast.

[scrapbookbuzz]

I've been thinking about how to get my Aspie daughter (13yo) out "into the world" as well because, like your son, she would spend the entire day in her room/inside,playing with her LPS's, if I let her. Which I won't.

 

Something I recently read (here, I think) about Aspie kids is, if you want to look at sports for them, look into "individual" sports; for example, karate, ballet, archery, etc. Nothing that involves lots of stimuli.

 

She's also involved in a drama class. I think drama/theatre classes are great for Aspies because everyone in drama is a little quirky. ;)

 

You don't live in AZ do you? Otherwise, I'd suggest getting our kiddos together!

 

So sorry about being "dumped" by your friend. That must have been really hard on all of you!

[Joyofsixreboot]

My ds looks searching for answers to his endless questions on the internet .....

 

Good luck. :grouphug:

 

Hey, that's not only an Aspie thing, says the lady who knows far too many trivial facts:D

[RoughCollie]

He truly does spend nearly all waking hours in his room, alone.

 

So does my son. I make him come out and do his cyber-school work in the living room, under the guise of my being lonely. The other kids are at school.

 

My son loves baseball, especially the Red Sox. He is a walking encyclopedia of baseball, and it is really interesting to listen to him talk about the players and the history of the game.

 

Lately, he has become interested in philosophy, and spends a lot of time researching it, thinking about it, and questioning me using the Socratic method.

 

He has no friends, except for his siblings. He answers every personal question with "I don't know". It is beyond my ability to come up with something else that he would enjoy doing. Basically, he has to think of it himself, or he is not interested.

[angel marie]

how 'bout photography?

[Rhonda in TX]

DS like Lego Digital Designer. It's gotten him very interested in CAD and he now wants to pursue a job using it (CAD, that is). Other than that, he plays too many video games. He also plays viola, but that's something we make him do. He likes orchestra and performing, but despises lessons and practicing, so I'm not sure it's actually worth it.

 

My DS does not have many friends. He had a friend from childhood, but they have grown apart over the years. About a year ago we met a very nice homeschooling family. They have a son close in age to my son who is very tolerant of DS's quirkiness. We see them quite a bit. That's probably the closest thing to a friend DS has.

[AngieW in Texas]

My 18yo and 16yo girls are both Aspies.

 

My 18yo spent most of her time in her room. Just getting her to join us anywhere else in the house was sometimes a challenge. She left to go to her cc classes, but that was about it. She has come out of her shell some now that she's in college, but she still doesn't do much with others. She went to the Asperger's Support group twice and then decided she didn't like it because it was with a group. She got involved with the UTD-TV group, but said that she's just going to finish out this semester and then drop it. She does like the animation guild she joined. She's never managed to keep friends for very long. A little bit of her goes a very long way.

 

My 16yo does more. At least she talks to people. Everybody in our neighborhood who goes to the park or who walks their dog knows her. She walks to the park to swing just about every day and she usually swings for at least 30 minutes and also talks to whoever happens to be there. She'll push little kids in the swings and love on all the dogs and talk. She's likely to go to the same school that my oldest is at. I think she'll have an easier time socially, but will find a full load of classes to be extremely stressful. Her friends tend to outgrow her after several years. They shift to becoming acquaintances when their interests diverge. She typically makes friends with kids 3-4 years younger than she is.

 

I think it's funny that she is constantly surprised that in the cc classes she's had so far, everybody knows her by name within just a few weeks even though she only knows a few of them. She's kind of hard to miss. She's 16yo, but looks more like she's 13yo or 14yo. She's just barely 5 feet tall. She always sits in the front row as close to the center as she can get.