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Another difficult neighbor question-- please advise


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We received a letter from the local police department lately, telling us that a s*x offender had moved into the neighborhood and we are entitled to be notified, by law. This person was arrested for climbing up a ladder and looking into a woman's room (she was n*ked at the time). He told police that he had done this before, often. He served his time in jail and is now staying with family in our neighborhood.

Soon after this, a concerned mom who lives across the street from him came around to tell all families with children exactly which house he lives in. She is horrified because she has young teen daughters. We live about 3 blocks away, around a couple of corners. It is a quiet, wooded area. When we take a walk in the neighborhood, it is almost always past that house, because that is the way to the doughnut store, and the only way out of our neighborhood, if you are walking. It is far enough, though, that my kids will not wander over accidentally.

My question is, how do we, or do we, change our lives because of this news? I do not want to live in fear. I do not want my children to live in fear. But I do not want myself or my kids to be on his radar either. I hate to give up our favorite walk because of this person. After all, he has taken his medicine from the civil authorities. And, is he really dangerous? Does peeping in windows lead to worse crimes?

Neighbor mom wants to pressure him to move out. I don't think that's appropriate. But I don't want to become acquainted with him and be friends either! I want to stay off his radar, and I want to be able to enjoy our neighborhood and our walk, which is healthy for us.

Has anyone had experience with this? What did you do? Would you walk past that house or not?

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I don't see a problem walking by his house as long as you are with them. My biggest concern would be locking the doors, keeping blinds closed, and not leaving the kids alone outside. Of course those are things to do anyway, because you never know who is living in the neighborhood.

 

It is great that your town notified you! My parents live two doors down from an offender that moved in over the summer, and they never got word. I search the registry every few months just to see who is registered near us and places our kids frequent.

 

It is scary for sure! Be safe!

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:grouphug: sorry to hear about this.

 

We have a s*x offender who lives down the street from us. Same block. We also walk past the house when we take walks. I don't like it, but I don't allow his being there to stop us from enjoying the rest of the neighborhood. I just make sure to be constantly aware of my surroundings. And of course I pray for protection for me and my children. :)

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You walk with them, right? Then I don't see the problem. If it makes you feel better, carry a can of mace and a whistle.

 

Otherwise, make sure you all close your blinds and instruct your kids not to open the door for anyone they don't know (which you've probably done already).

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This person was arrested for climbing up a ladder and looking into a woman's room (she was n*ked at the time). He told police that he had done this before, often. He served his time in jail and is now staying with family in our neighborhood.

Soon after this, a concerned mom who lives across the street from him came around to tell all families with children exactly which house he lives in. She is horrified because she has young teen daughters. We live about 3 blocks away, around a couple of corners. It is a quiet, wooded area.

 

 

Right now, there's an alert in our area for an exposer. I don't even look up addresses on the sex offender registry anymore; I just assume there's probably one nearby.:glare: When I walk with my children in the neighborhood we have a big dog with us, a cell phone, and pepper spray.

 

In your situation (especially the quiet, wooded part) : don't keep ladders outside, go outside at night to make sure you can't see through your window coverings, have adequate outdoor lighting and leave it on all night, and cut back/severely prune any shrubbery near your house that would be a good hiding place. I'm also a fan of a monitored home security system.

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I think you or one of the adults in your family should (prepare yourself) go meet the guy. You might be able to find more information that would make you feel better.

 

For example: My mom lives around the corner (literally, backyards touch) to a guy who is a convicted child molester. I was freaked out when I realized the man's proximity, but then I actually saw the guy... confined to a wheel chair and on oxygen. IOW, not a threat. I have not worried about it since.

 

I would just proceed as normal, close my shades, and walk where I wanted to walk. What was safe last week is probably just as safe.

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I understand that you are not afraid of this guy barreling out of the house to attack you on the way to donuts. You are afraid that he will notice your teen daughters and seek them out in some way. I totally get that.

 

Use this as an opportunity to teach your kids - we can't live in fear. We take appropriate safeguards and don't take unnecessary risks.

 

Best wishes

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I think you or one of the adults in your family should (prepare yourself) go meet the guy. You might be able to find more information that would make you feel better.

 

For example: My mom lives around the corner (literally, backyards touch) to a guy who is a convicted child molester. I was freaked out when I realized the man's proximity, but then I actually saw the guy... confined to a wheel chair and on oxygen. IOW, not a threat. I have not worried about it since.

 

I would just proceed as normal, close my shades, and walk where I wanted to walk. What was safe last week is probably just as safe.

 

There's also the sex offenders who were 20 and were with a 17 yr old, whose papa wasn't happy and pressed charges. :glare:

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You might want to warn your friend not to start harrassing the guy. That's probably not going to go over well with the cops, even if the guy is a sex offender.

 

This is exactly what I am thinking! I would not be happy with the situation, that's for sure. However, I will have no part in doing something that could be illegal. I don't want to be arrested, and I most certainly don't want to be sued.

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