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If you a birthday party for your children over the weekend


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and their actual birth day is during the week, Do you give them their birthday gift at the birthday party or during the small family gathering the actual day of their birthday?

 

Dd's birthday is the 13th, I have a birthday party this afternoon for her and her friends and will make her pick of dinner and have a cake with family on Thursday night. Give her main gift this afternoon or wait until Thursday?

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I ask myself this everytime too. :)

 

What we've always done is given the main gift at the party when the friends are there. I find my kids like to open the gifts with their friends and their friends enjoy seeing/playing with what they get. We save a smaller (or more meaningful) gift for the actual day.

 

ETA: I just went back and reread your siggy and see that your dd is only 4/5. At that age, we did the big gift on their birthday. We started doing it on the party day around 6, or 7, when they (and their friends) are all able to play nice. ;)

Edited by plain jane
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We always do the kids' birthday gifts on their birthday, and have cupcakes or something small, just us. I would like to get to the point where we do a 'birthday dinner' on the night of their birthday with us, and then their party with friends on the weekend. Since grandparents and extended family aren't invited to birthday parties after age 5, we may have the grandparents join in as well, but no one else. Well, unless we went out for dinner, then I'm ok with asking a few of the extended family. All of DH's brothers (that matter, anyway) live here in town. We're relatively close to them all, so just to go out to eat together wouldn't be weird I don't think, for a birthday.

I always thought it was odd to wait and give the gifts at the party, perhaps due to the fact that's not what my family has ever done. I can't help but think why wait? Haven't you been with your kid every day, including on their actual birthday? lol

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I do gifts from parents/grandparents on the actual birthday, and gifts from friends at the party-mostly because kids really only care about seeing the birthday child open THEIR gift. It also helps space things out for DD, and can sometimes avoid comments or confusion. For example, one of DD's most desired gifts last year was a "REAL dictionary, not one for babies". Somehow, I doubt her dance friends (most of whom were in Kindergarten or 1st grade last year) would have understood her happy dance with Webster's Collegiate.

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and their actual birth day is during the week, Do you give them their birthday gift at the birthday party or during the small family gathering the actual day of their birthday?

 

Dd's birthday is the 13th, I have a birthday party this afternoon for her and her friends and will make her pick of dinner and have a cake with family on Thursday night. Give her main gift this afternoon or wait until Thursday?

 

DS's birthday is also on Thursday. Grandma brings them balloons and a small toy on the actual day. We'll have his "favorite dinner" - which changes weekly - and have cupcakes or cookies. We save our gifts and cards for the weekend family party. We also have waffles and ice cream for breakfast on the birthday weekend.

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After wrestling with this for 11 years we now make the actual birthday a special family day with dinner out, ice cream from an ice cream place, and presents. The weekend party is for friends and family if we have a party (the birthday child can have a party or we can go on a weekend trip, their choice).

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We never have a party on the child's actual birthday.

 

Friend parties are on the weekends, well, because that's usually when they happen. Friends give gifts then, if they want to.

 

We do a family celebration on the actual day and that is when we give our gifts to our children.

 

Parties are usually crazy, hectic, lots going on. Child already getting several gifts.

 

I prefer to give our gifts in the intimate setting of just our family, so I can see my child's reaction/appreciation, and so they can also see it.

 

But on that note, several years ago, we stopped opening the gifts at the actual parties as well (unless it is a sleepover). The crazy display of gift opening, with the children crowding around, crawling over each other, grabbing the gift, passing it around, then everyone wanting to open it, and possibly lost parts/directions, not to mention the risk of DS reaction to the gift (yes we taught our children manners, but children are children and can be unpredictable, well mortifying, in situations). I doubt 13 year olds are doing any of this, but it's still the point.

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