My brain can't handle any more tasks

[Jean in Newcastle]

I want blinders for an after-Christmas present. I am so behind in my life. I need to be able to just concentrate on one thing at a time and get things done, organized, and easy to maintain. But even as I try to get this backlog of things done, there is always someone (ok - usually my dh) saying "Why haven't you done ___________?" "Shouldn't you set up ___________?" These are things that haven't even made it onto my to-do list yet. But they're important things like Dr. appointments, speech therapy for dd etc. Am I ever going to get things done? Can't I just put the world in to some kind of freeze while I get caught up? I want to start back to my 20's and do this all over with a personal assistant by my side.

[Peela]

Do you think its the time of year? As much as Christmas does have its beauty...I am so glad to be steadily returning to my normal routine where I can stay more on top of things.

Do you have a system that works for you? I have tried many for myself over the years. Everytime I think of something that needs doing, I write it down in my one page to a day large diary that sits open on my desk next to my computer. All phone messages etc and notes get written there too. That way nothing is lost. Then on my right on the wall is a large squared desk calendar where I write all appointments- I like to see them at a glance so a month to a page works for me for that.

I also have a book where I write my dreams, my projects I would like to get to, etc.

For me though, writing everything down as I think of it, no matter how minor it seems, helps keep it out of going around in my head, or maintaing the effort of trying to remember it all (that much memory space was filled up long ago- not much space in there any more). Most days I write a TO DO list and having notes of tasks that need doing- even if they go back for several days- helps me prioritise each item.

I read Getting Things Done a few months back- excellent book for teaching you organisational skills.

[justamouse]

Have you reminded him how sick you've been and then how it was Christmas and would he like me to send him a letter?

 

I bet you don't even really have your feet under you yet!

 

Really, give yourself a break. Make yourself a list. Prioritize. Then take the next few days and *rest* then tackle the list one bite at a time.

[Denisemomof4]

I *COMPLETELY* relate to what you're going through. It's something I've been reflecting on myself lately. Since my head injury, I just will never return to being organized or efficient. I will never again be wired like that, but others were never wired like that from the beginning. Anyway, it can be SO overwhelming to look at the big picture and try to plow through all the things there are to do. What I do instead is make a to-do list and leave it on the island and scratch away things as I go. Add EVERYTHING on there, big and small. Sometimes you will skip over one to get to another because the one task is simply too large for you to do at that time. BUT, when you see things getting crossed off more and more, it's almost as if it energizes you to do more.

 

If something new comes along that needs to be put on the top, write it down and look at NO other tasks until that ONE is complete.

 

For me, this is the only way I can handle things now. The one thing that really bothers me, though, that I still can't figure out, is how to keep a pantry and refrigerator filled. I try to not allow myself to think of how efficient I used to be, with TWO stocked pantries (one in the basement) and a refrigerator of wonderful food, because I do know I'll never get there. Still, there's so much crap in this house and nobody ever has anything to eat and dh is always going to the store on the way home so we can have food to eat. :001_huh:I know that sounds crazy, and it is, but that's just the way it is for us now. And I feel horrible about it.

 

I don't know why I rambled off all of that stuff that doesn't apply to your thread, but I'm going to leave it.:lol::lol::lol:

[Elizabeth in WA]

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

It will be okay. Not a lot of business will be done in the next week, and trying to set up speech therapy and appointments may just be an exercise in frustration before January 3. You'll get to those things, but there really is no need to feel behind over them. And perhaps your dh could contribute to getting some things set up instead of just reminding you to do it? You're a much better wife than I not to have made a less than kind suggestion to that effect when he brings those things up after the way the last few months have been for you.

 

I think this time is just difficult. A wonderful as Christmas is, it adds tremendously to the to do list in a time sensitive fashion and came right after you were so sick this year.

[Denisemomof4]

BTW, Jean, you got sick for a REAL long time and you've had other health issues to deal with. It's REALLY hard trying to catch up. My mom passed away 1.5 years ago and I still don't have our office (her bedroom) restored to the way it once was. It's like I'm so overwhelmed that I don't know where to start. still, I to get beyond this, I focus on ONE CHUNK to accomplish and then when that's done I move onto another.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Do you think its the time of year?

 

Sort of in the sense that Christmas related things took up a lot of time on their own.

Do you have a system that works for you?

 

I have a to-do list every day. Most days things are in categories - the things I have to do for school, to keep up on laundry, to keep up on meals etc. Right now on vacation I'm experimenting with having marathon project sessions where I spend all day on one special multi-step task.

I read Getting Things Done a few months back- excellent book for teaching you organisational skills.

 

I'll look for this book, thank you.

 

Have you reminded him how sick you've been and then how it was Christmas and would he like me to send him a letter?

 

I bet you don't even really have your feet under you yet!

 

Really, give yourself a break. Make yourself a list. Prioritize. Then take the next few days and *rest* then tackle the list one bite at a time.

 

:D You would think he'd remember how sick I've been. Yes, I have to remember how to eat that elephant. . .

 

I *COMPLETELY* relate to what you're going through.

 

I don't have the excuse of a brain injury:D but I do have the excuse of being so terribly tired. Did I tell you that I fell asleep right in the middle of the family Christmas celebration - with at least 10 very loud people around me?:lol: (Shh. They said I even snored a little. . .) Just writing things down and looking at my long list makes me tired!

 

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

It will be okay. Not a lot of business will be done in the next week, and trying to set up speech therapy and appointments may just be an exercise in frustration before January 3. You'll get to those things, but there really is no need to feel behind over them. And perhaps your dh could contribute to getting some things set up instead of just reminding you to do it? You're a much better wife than I not to have made a less than kind suggestion to that effect when he brings those things up after the way the last few months have been for you.

 

I think this time is just difficult. A wonderful as Christmas is, it adds tremendously to the to do list in a time sensitive fashion and came right after you were so sick this year.

 

Thanks, Elizabeth. I may call you after the New Year for pointers on dealing with the schools on speech therapy. . .

 

Dh is just as busy as I am, if not more so right now. He's working 40+ hours in a management position and then trying to pastor on the side. . . He just can't help me out right now, otherwise I would be making exactly the same suggestions as you would. . .!

[Rosie_0801]

"I haven't done X because I'm a lazy slug and I don't care about any of you. Is that what you wanted to hear? No? Well, maybe I haven't done X because I've been too busy doing Y and Z. Maybe you already know that too, so how about you pretend you think I'm doing my best and either wait until I get to it or outsource to someone else."

 

Rosie- thinks there is a time and place for snark, these situations are it, and under the circumstances the above is much more polite than the deserved "<pickaword> off!"

[Denisemomof4]

"I haven't done X because I'm a lazy slug and I don't care about any of you. Is that what you wanted to hear? No? Well, maybe I haven't done X because I've been too busy doing Y and Z. Maybe you already know that too, so how about you pretend you think I'm doing my best and either wait until I get to it or outsource to someone else."

 

Rosie- thinks there is a time and place for snark, these situations are it, and under the circumstances the above is much more polite than the deserved "<pickaword> off!"

 

THIS!!!!!!!! Rosie IS my hero! Use her words!:D

 

Jean, you poor thing. You probably felt bad falling asleep but I'm sure nobody else did! Today my family had to stop watching MY movie that dh bought for ME because apparently my snoring told them to. Oh well.:tongue_smilie:

[Jean in Newcastle]

"I haven't done X because I'm a lazy slug and I don't care about any of you. Is that what you wanted to hear? No? Well, maybe I haven't done X because I've been too busy doing Y and Z. Maybe you already know that too, so how about you pretend you think I'm doing my best and either wait until I get to it or outsource to someone else."

 

Rosie- thinks there is a time and place for snark, these situations are it, and under the circumstances the above is much more polite than the deserved "<pickaword> off!"

 

:lol: Having an answer for him isn't really the problem. All I have to do is to give him "the look". I have a very powerful "look";)

 

It's more a matter of feeling overwhelmed because I do know that these as important things too but I just don't see where in the next year I'll even get to them. . .

[Rosie_0801]

:lol: Having an answer for him isn't really the problem. All I have to do is to give him "the look". I have a very powerful "look";)

 

It's more a matter of feeling overwhelmed because I do know that these as important things too but I just don't see where in the next year I'll even get to them. . .

 

 

Yeah I know. Now my snark has been spent, what I really meant was that a lot of those things need to be someone else's responsibilities instead of yours. If you can't do stuff, you can't do stuff and no amount of "I/you should be able to" will change that. The more you guilt, the less you'll be capable of actually doing. It's like hamstringing yourself. And if your hubby needs to dump more responsibilities than you can handle onto you, he's over-scheduled and needs to drop something.

 

Rosie

[newlifemom]

:grouphug:

 

pm'd you.

[Tammyla]

I've placed the audio book on hold at the library. Thanks for the post and recommendation.

 

Jean...I'm right there with you, but for me winter almost always gets to me, and this year, the January weather started a month early.:grouphug: We've got no sun and freezing fog this morning on top of the almost two feet of snow and 11'. To be honest, this isn't all the bad compared to ice storms and no power. (I keep reminding myself that this is baby weather, and I need to get used to it.)

 

I think you, must be run down and overwhelmed. It's so hard when your body wont cooperate. Big hugs to you, and prayers for healing.

 

 

Do you think its the time of year? As much as Christmas does have its beauty...I am so glad to be steadily returning to my normal routine where I can stay more on top of things.

Do you have a system that works for you? I have tried many for myself over the years. Everytime I think of something that needs doing, I write it down in my one page to a day large diary that sits open on my desk next to my computer. All phone messages etc and notes get written there too. That way nothing is lost. Then on my right on the wall is a large squared desk calendar where I write all appointments- I like to see them at a glance so a month to a page works for me for that.

I also have a book where I write my dreams, my projects I would like to get to, etc.

For me though, writing everything down as I think of it, no matter how minor it seems, helps keep it out of going around in my head, or maintaing the effort of trying to remember it all (that much memory space was filled up long ago- not much space in there any more). Most days I write a TO DO list and having notes of tasks that need doing- even if they go back for several days- helps me prioritise each item.

I read Getting Things Done a few months back- excellent book for teaching you organisational skills.

[JFSinIL]

You have y perission to do only ONE thing each day after you ake a list of what needs to be done and tape it to the 'fridge.

 

Sorry about y lack of the letter that coes before "n" - the key on the keyboard won't woprk anyore.

[klmama]

One of those extra things a day. Just one. Call one place for an appointment, then do whatever else you need to do today - including rest! Tomorrow, call one other place for the appointment, then do your daily things. Surely, by the end of a week or two you will have made all the appointments needed, and you'll also have taken some steps to get caught up with the regular things. Even if you haven't gotten caught up, those hard-to-get appointments will already be scheduled, and you won't have them hanging over your head anymore.

[Mejane]

I have issues with stamina. Some days I just don't have the energy to do anything more than basic ADLs. So I try really hard to go with the flow of how I'm feeling. If I have a day when I feel a burst of energy, I will go with it and get things done, even if it's only a few phone calls. Listen to the body; it knows what it's talkin' about. :grouphug: