Can Autistic Symptoms Disappear on Their Own?

[missionarymom]

About a month and a half ago we started the process of having my son evaluated for Autism. Our first appointment is Dec. 29 for an initial screening.

 

It's strange, though, that this whole past month he's made major improvements in behavior, speech, etc., and I'm wondering if autistic tendencies can decrease over time, with age/development etc.

 

Until now, he has displayed many of the classic symptoms, and I have pictures, videos, documentation that scream autism. Others have noticed and recommended the same.

 

Now with all of the improvements I'm wondering if I should even take him.

 

Any thoughts?

[missionarymom]

To clarify...

 

I'm just afraid they're going to look at me and think I'm crazy :(

[Ottakee]

Have you made any other changes---diet, location, allergy stuff, medication, or ?????

 

Sometimes those things can really affect autistic behavior.

[missionarymom]

I've been trying to think through any changes, but can't think of anything different...except that we did put together a "therapy" room at our house with a swing, tunnels, balance beam, sensory toys, etc., but we haven't done anything structured with it yet. He has been playing with things in there though. Could that have made that big of a difference?

[rieshy]

The appearance of Autism can definitely disappear:

My 4 yo was initially flagged for testing for Autism by our ped. It turned out that his "behaviors" were all blood sugar related due to his metabolic condition (a FOD). Once he started treatment for his genetic condition all his "autistic" characteristics disappeared.

 

Has your child had periods of regression in the past? If so my gut feeling would be to keep the appointments.

 

There are worse things than looking crazy:) Also- I'd ask a friend, preferably a very blunt friend who has seen your child in group settings, how they see your child and his behavior before you make up your mind.

[Storm Bay]

I've been trying to think through any changes, but can't think of anything different...except that we did put together a "therapy" room at our house with a swing, tunnels, balance beam, sensory toys, etc., but we haven't done anything structured with it yet. He has been playing with things in there though. Could that have made that big of a difference?

 

Yes!!!! I highly recommend the book Smart Moves: Why Learning is not All in Your Head by Carla Hannaford http://www.amazon.com/Smart-Moves-Learning-Your-Head/dp/0915556375/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291312426&sr=8-1. Not that it can take away autism, but it can help make the appearance of autism disappear.

 

The appearance of Autism can definitely disappear:

My 4 yo was initially flagged for testing for Autism by our ped. It turned out that his "behaviors" were all blood sugar related due to his metabolic condition (a FOD). Once he started treatment for his genetic condition all his "autistic" characteristics disappeared.

 

Has your child had periods of regression in the past? If so my gut feeling would be to keep the appointments.

 

There are worse things than looking crazy:) Also- I'd ask a friend, preferably a very blunt friend who has seen your child in group settings, how they see your child and his behavior before you make up your mind.

:iagree: There are may things that can cause the appearance of autism wtihout a dc having autism. On of my dd's took swim lessons with a girl who had been diagnosed with autism at 3 (strong symptoms). After a battery of tests conducted by a DAN! doctor, it turned out she had immune problems. Once she was put on antifungals & antivirals her symptoms disappeared. The author of Eat Right for Your Type

discusses diet & autism, and has seen some changes in some dc who appeared to be autistic.

 

Some dc are autistic and nothing you do with diet, meds, exercise, etc takes that away.

 

ETA I'd still go for the testing, and forgot to mention that earlier.

Edited December 2, 2010 by Karin

[MamaSheep]

A lot of therapy is just directed play, and yes sometimes kids "therapize" themselves a bit--they figure out what makes them feel better, and they do it because it feels good. Sometimes they figure out new coping strategies on their own. Sometimes a little age and maturity help them move through a developmental hiccup on their own. Sometimes having a nice "save place" where they can go and just be themselves without anyone picking at them to conform to their program and set of social expectations can help them recharge and destress and handle things better the rest of the day. In my own experience, and talking with other moms with autistic kids, when a child feels stressed and overwhelmed and emotionally tired those autistic behaviors seem to intensify, and sometimes new ones pop up that leave your head spinning and make you think he's regressing or that you're going crazy yourself. And the reverse is also true. When an autistic child feels safe and relaxed, and like he has some control in his life, and like the adults who take care of him know what they're doing, many of the autistic behaviors tone waaay down and they can make developmental strides more quickly and easily. I have also noticed (as have some of my friends) that sometimes these kids go through patterns of regression followed by developmental bursts where suddenly they start doing things they were never able to do before. With my ds this often happens right after a big regression, and before I saw the pattern it made me freak out every time because I saw him losing ground and digging up old dysfunctional behaviors I thought we'd worked through. Now when I see him doing that I just sort of figuratively grit my teeth and hold my breath and hope it's just that old "slingshot" pattern we've been through before and not some new horrible catastrophe. So far, so good, because so far those periods have always been followed by sudden forward bursts of developmental progress where he suddenly starts doing something that's been a "block" for years. As he gets older and I see the pattern over and over again it has started helping me relax about the whole thing and trust that he will get where he's going, and learn what he needs, in his own time and in his own way, as long as we support and help and facilitate a bit along the way.

 

But you will find that with autism and development nobody really knows what to expect. Not even the "experts". Each child is different, and this is even more the case with autistic kids.

 

My advice would be to take the evaluators copies of some of your pictures and photos and documentation if you haven't done so already. Autism isn't something you "grow out of", and they know that. If he was autistic last week, he still is this week, even if it is less apparent. But yes, the kids can be pretty good at getting along fine anyway and coping so well that they appear "typical" for a while. If he really is autistic, though, there will be more developmental oddities down the road, and early therapies can still help make those bumps into molehills rather than mountains.

 

It took a while for my ds to be diagnosed because he's very verbal and bright, and he was very relaxed and articulate with doctors, in the controlled, non-threatening medical office environment. It wasn't until we had some evaluators actually witness him in action in a "real life" setting that someone could finally tell us what was going on with him. Until then they just thought I was a paranoid first-time mother with a little genius on my hands and I couldn't handle having a child that was smarter than me or something. I wish I had been smart enough to take in documentation of what I was seeing at home instead of just trying to describe it. I think we would have gotten some help a lot sooner. But doctors are more knowledgeable nowadays too, and I would guess that if you're working with people who specialize in evaluating for autism they are very aware that the behaviors can come and go and change over time or from one setting to another. It shouldn't be a surprise to them to hear what you have told us, and I would be surprised if it made any competent evaluator think you're crazy. I would say take him anyway. And take some documentation. And just tell them what you've told us. It will be fine. And I think it would be good for you to know, one way or the other, how the evaluations come out. More information is always better, IMO.

[merry gardens]

About a month and a half ago we started the process of having my son evaluated for Autism. Our first appointment is Dec. 29 for an initial screening.

 

It's strange, though, that this whole past month he's made major improvements in behavior, speech, etc., and I'm wondering if autistic tendencies can decrease over time, with age/development etc.

 

Until now, he has displayed many of the classic symptoms, and I have pictures, videos, documentation that scream autism. Others have noticed and recommended the same.

 

Now with all of the improvements I'm wondering if I should even take him.

 

Any thoughts?

I'm just putting some of my thoughts down here. I don't have a child with autism, but I have a BIL on the autism spectrum. I see some of my BIL's behaviors, sensory issues and language issues in the rest of the family. While I recognize that there is something very different about people with autism, I also think that in many ways they are just more extreme versions of the rest of us.

 

Autism is a spectrum disorder. It is a range of behaviors and various other things. If too many of them show up, someone can be diagnosed with autism. Many of those very same behaviors and tendencies occur in "normal" people too, but to a much lesser degree and not all at the same time. My husband is sensitive to light, (esp. florescent light), one of my children has a big thing about food textures, another one has dyslexia and language problems, a couple have had some speech issues, and I'm kind of picky about the fabric on my clothes. There are more things too. None of my immediate family has autism, but if any one person had all those traits all together, it would probably qualify as something on the autism spectrum.

 

Since you made those changes to your home with a therapy room, your child might now be engaging in activities to help him change his behavior enough to fall within the range of normal. I think it's great that you set up that room! I like looking at and incorporating ot and speech therapist's therapy recommendations into my home too.

 

I read a blog by a speech therapist whose work includes going into homes and recommending toys to help encourage speech. You might find it interesting. http://playonwords.com/blog/category/birth-3-year-olds/

 

"...Recently I was asked to consult on a 22 month-old boy who was very quiet, had no words, and just started to string babble together. Professionals and the parents were concerned about autism since he had a delay in social skills also. Glancing around the room, I made a quick assessment of Sam’s toys. Featured in the middle of the room was a large train table with an intricate Thomas the Train set with multiple tracks but no people. There were several shape sorters, blocks and toys that encourage fine motor development. What was missing?

Grabbing my Mary Poppins bag of toys, I brought out some Fisher Price “Little People,” vehicles, slides, table and chairs and a car wash. Delighted, Sam immediately took the bus and began to open and close the door, show interest in the bus driver and then set him up for driving. When I brought out the little table with cups, cookies and a cake on it, he tilted the little boy figure to take a bite, closed his own mouth imitating my “mmmmm” and then offered some cookies to a truck nearby! Not bad for pretend play! We had interaction, open-ended play, some imitation of sounds and symbolic play.

I told the parents that I didn’t see a child with autism but rather a little boy who needed some therapy to encourage talking. ..."

 

[sbgrace]

I don't know if I can explain this well but the outward "stuff" that we readily identify with autism can fluctuate a lot in my experience. My son would look more or less autistic depending on a range of things going on physically (as simple as fatigue to as serious as an untreated/unidentified metabolic condition and build up of fatty acids like a pp also experienced). But if there is actual autism the underlying things will still be here and a trained and competent person will be able to accurately diagnose.

 

When my son was treated for the metabolics he gained tons of skills and looked, to me, just ADD instead of autism. We had another huge gain when we did vision therapy that made me think he was maybe misdiagnosed for a bit. The more I've learned the more I see that those underlying issues are still there (ie he still isn't a natural at reading nonverbals in others). With the metabolic condition under control he is much more stable in appearance.

 

Of course there are bad evaluators at times as well. I think, though, if the evaluator is good the appt. will be worthwhile.

[wapiti]

Disclaimer: I don't have any autistic kids, so I'm no expert. A long time ago, I read that if autism symptoms disappear as the speech comes in, the child was not autistic to begin with. In other words, it is not uncommon for late talkers to be misdiagnosed.

 

FWIW, one of mine was a sensitive toddler who at 2 y.o. had head-banging tantrums that could last an hour, lined up cars all day long, and had no words until 3 y.o., but he is not on the spectrum. Indeed, unlike his two siblings closest in age, he later was not even sensitive enough for me to bother getting OT for SPD.

 

Yet, I've also read over the years opinions (of random people) who would say that all late talkers with SPD should be on the spectrum (which would include two of my kids). This is not an argument that makes sense to me, because the crux of the diagnosis according to the current DSM would be missing.

 

IMO, a lot of "stereotypical" (to use a vague and circular word from the DSM :glare:) behaviors are not that uncommon amongst kids under 3 anyway. So it would seem that early diagnosis could be misleading if the diagnostic criteria are not followed very carefully. Personally, I'd be careful about what doctor I'd accept such a diagnosis from.

 

Missionarymom, I'd go back through the diagnostic criteria to see if they're still present, at least as far as you can tell. I'd also take a look at the Eides' "The Mislabeled Child," which discusses several kinds of issues which appear to overlap with autism or have similar symptoms. They'd be looking for a severe lack of emotional empathy, from what I recall.

[razorbackmama]

They did for my son.

 

Just before age 3 he had several autistic behaviors present: echolalia, almost never pointed things out in his environment, visual stimming, delayed language, didn't play with toys properly, etc. We had an appt. for an evaluation 3 days before I was due with a baby (since I "never go early"). Well that is the sure fire way to deliver early:lol: - we came home from the hospital the DAY BEFORE the evaluation. So we had to reschedule for 6 months later.

 

By the time we got to that appt., he had outgrown many of the behaviors, or at least they were improving. Thanks to Blue's Clues, he was pointing things out in his environment. Sure, they all were "A CLUE! A CLUE!" but he was doing it! He was talking more. Etc. Still had some, but they were improved. The evaluators said that since he was improving to come back in a year. So we did.

 

In a year we came back, and while he did still have some social cue issues and a FEW other things, he had improved GREATLY. He still got diagnosed with PDD-NOS since he met some but not all of the criteria. This qualified him for some services, which he received for about 2 months because he progressed so much that he no longer qualified for them.

 

He is now 12 and you'd never know. He's totally normal. A bit spacey at times (we've lived in this house for almost 3 years, and he still doesn't know where we keep some things in the kitchen LOL), but overall he is 100% normal.

 

(Warning: Rant ahead)

 

I have come to believe that many times what is called "autistic" ISN'T. I'm not saying this is the case with your son since I don't know him or you, but I will say that IMNSHO the #1 reason for the explosion of autism in recent years isn't due to vaccines, food dyes, or whatever but because of the diagnostic criteria. When the DSM-IV came out in 1994, it severely broadened the diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum disorders, and now many kids are being diagnosed with autism (or some other spectrum disorder) that don't really have autism.

 

I remember seeing some news blip about a group that put together a website with videos of "autistic behaviors" on it, so that parents can see what theses behaviors look like and then get evaluations if their kids have some of them. Much of what they were showing as "autistic behaviors" were NORMAL CHILD BEHAVIORS when you take into account different personalities and such. For example, it was a kid and the researcher person. The kid wouldn't interact with the researcher person. DUH, IT WAS OBVIOUS THE KID WAS SHY. But that was considered to be an "autistic behavior."

 

I was LIVID when I saw it.

 

Anyway. I'd go with your gut. If you think there is a problem, then there probably is. If you're going by a list of criteria and you see that he's outgrowing the behaviors, then there probably isn't a problem (at least not with your son...I can't speak to the list of criteria;) ).

 

I recently read an article in Psychology Today by the chair of the committee that put together the diagnostic criteria for the DSM-IV. EVEN HE is saying that they screwed up and that there is a huge number of kids being diagnosed with it that don't really have it.

 

So it could be that your son is just a bit on the slow side developmentally or that he's a little quirky or that he's got a different personality of sorts, that unfortunately has been labeled as an "autistic behavior" by the dumb committee. Might he have autism? Possibly. But I'd bet that if he's outgrowing things this quickly, that he's perfectly normal and that he's one of the ones that would be misdiagnosed with it.

[Storm Bay]

Keep the appointment, but I'd like to add that at 3 it could have been simply that your ds has a developmental pattern that is simply different than most dc. Some dc don't speak until age 3 without any autistic spectrum issues at all (I have 4 cousins on my mothers side in that boat.). Some dc deveop their social skills later, too.

 

My ds has never shown any signs of being on the autistic spectrum and spoke before 3, but he had a very different developmental pattern than most dc in other areas and we fond out shortly before he turned 4 that he had vision issues. He was born with low muscle tone so did have early intervention. At one time he was behind in EVERYTHING, but it turns out he's gifted academically but developed other areas first.

 

If there is a diagnosis of autism or some non verbal learning disability, etc, then I highly recommend finding a DAN! doctor.

[Niffercoo]

I'd keep the appointment. When my son was small, about once a year I would start to really worry about all of his behaviors. And then, usually within a few months, they would all seem to disappear and I would talk myself out of getting him evaluated.

 

He went to public school and the same thing happened there for them. They ended up telling me he just needed to repeat Kindergarten. Instead, we started homeschooling.

 

Finally, when he was 9, there was just no explaining away the behaviors that would creep up only now and then. When he was 10 he was diagnosed with Aspergers. Most of the time now, at 14.5, you would never know he is on the spectrum. But he is there. And I wish I had just followed through with an evaluation when he was little.

 

I would take in your documentation, and then they will see your child now, and you can definitely mention the differences if they aren't evident to the evaluators. It really can't hurt anything, except maybe your wallet! And even that is worth it!

[asta]

As an aspie who is the mother of an aspie, I have to agree more or less with razorback - go with your gut. If you feel that the symptoms you were seeing are no longer there... WAIT.

 

Why? Because once that diagnosis is in his file, there is no getting it OUT of his file. And it will affect every other life decision he wants to make. Like razorback said, there are a whole lot of normal kid behaviors that are being clumped under a "diagnosis" label (just as there are a whole lot of kids being undiagnosed, especially with ADHD).

 

My personal opinion is that society simply has too much time on its hands. People are looking at kids under a microscope. (I'm not saying you're doing this) Kids who used to spend time during the day and after school running around and burning off steam, aren't - and there has been an explosion of ADHD diagnoses. The kids who used to be labeled "shy" or "weird" or "geek" and were beat up on the playground for "not fitting in" (not saying this is right, just that that is how it used to be - trust me) are now given a medical label of ASD & huge organizations searching for a "cure".

 

I've said this before (again and again) on these fora: if it is at all possible for a kid with ASD or ASD tendencies to "fake it until you make it", then I strongly recommend that course (rather than the documented one). Is it harder? You bet. It is exasperating, it takes all of mom's energy, and it involves correction after correction (because the PS beatings aren't really the motivator anymore... thank god). But no doors are closed. Kid can try out for any club, school, or career he wants and feels capable of attending. If I'd insisted on a formal Dx, he couldn't have done that.

 

I realize this isn't for everyone. But we're not talking about everyone. You're talking about a kid who is so high functioning you're not even sure he HAS a disorder. I would strongly urge you to talk to someone knowledgeable "off the record" first. It's probably the best thing I ever did for my kid, and he HAS Asperger's (though you'd be hard pressed to know it, now, 17 years later). :001_smile:

 

 

a

[Storm Bay]

As an aspie who is the mother of an aspie, I have to agree more or less with razorback - go with your gut. If you feel that the symptoms you were seeing are no longer there... WAIT.

 

Why? Because once that diagnosis is in his file, there is no getting it OUT of his file. And it will affect every other life decision he wants to make. Like razorback said, there are a whole lot of normal kid behaviors that are being clumped under a "diagnosis" label (just as there are a whole lot of kids being undiagnosed, especially with ADHD).

 

 

 

a

 

 

This is a good point if it gets into a dc's file. With this new computerized medical system I guess it would stick there. This isn't something that was always an issue, and I hadn't thought about it. The new system is to be worldwide so that if you're travelling, a doctor in France can log in and see your computerized records from home.

[Shifra]

I read in Awakening Ashley: Mozart Knocks Autism on Its Ear by Sharon Ruben that a certain percentage of children with autism do get "cured" if they start therapy very young. The Autism Book by Robert Sears points out the same thing. If you have been playing and monitoring your child very closely (or someone else in your child's life has), you may have inadvertently been doing "therapy" for your child, perhaps along the lines of "Floortime" (see Engaging Autism: Using Floortime to Help Children Relate, Communicate and Think by Stanley I. Greenspan and Serena Wieder).

[razorbackmama]

As an aspie who is the mother of an aspie, I have to agree more or less with razorback - go with your gut. If you feel that the symptoms you were seeing are no longer there... WAIT.

 

Why? Because once that diagnosis is in his file, there is no getting it OUT of his file. And it will affect every other life decision he wants to make. Like razorback said, there are a whole lot of normal kid behaviors that are being clumped under a "diagnosis" label (just as there are a whole lot of kids being undiagnosed, especially with ADHD).

 

My personal opinion is that society simply has too much time on its hands. People are looking at kids under a microscope. (I'm not saying you're doing this) Kids who used to spend time during the day and after school running around and burning off steam, aren't - and there has been an explosion of ADHD diagnoses. The kids who used to be labeled "shy" or "weird" or "geek" and were beat up on the playground for "not fitting in" (not saying this is right, just that that is how it used to be - trust me) are now given a medical label of ASD & huge organizations searching for a "cure".

 

I've said this before (again and again) on these fora: if it is at all possible for a kid with ASD or ASD tendencies to "fake it until you make it", then I strongly recommend that course (rather than the documented one). Is it harder? You bet. It is exasperating, it takes all of mom's energy, and it involves correction after correction (because the PS beatings aren't really the motivator anymore... thank god). But no doors are closed. Kid can try out for any club, school, or career he wants and feels capable of attending. If I'd insisted on a formal Dx, he couldn't have done that.

 

I realize this isn't for everyone. But we're not talking about everyone. You're talking about a kid who is so high functioning you're not even sure he HAS a disorder. I would strongly urge you to talk to someone knowledgeable "off the record" first. It's probably the best thing I ever did for my kid, and he HAS Asperger's (though you'd be hard pressed to know it, now, 17 years later). :001_smile:

 

 

a

:iagree:

 

Also keep in mind that when it comes to something on the autism spectrum, for the most part the testing is completely subjective. The vast majority of the diagnosis will be based on what YOU TELL THEM, not so much on what they observe or any sort of test (though that can depend on the particular behaviors). So if you do pursue testing, that is something to keep in mind - what you say to them is what they will use for the formal diagnosis.

 

Another thing to consider is why you want testing. Do you think he needs some sort of services right now? If so, then you might just go ahead and test, so he can qualify for services. Then, later, as he outgrows them more, you can have him retested. They are finding that kids move off the spectrum as they get older. (Gee, could it be that the kids shouldn't have been diagnosed with it in the first place??????? But I digress....)

 

If you aren't looking for any sort of services right now, I'd probably wait. That's really the only reason they give kids a diagnosis anyway - so they qualify for services. (And sometimes they will give the kids a diagnosis when they don't fully meet the criteria, simply so they will qualify for services. I've got one of those kids too, and I was NONE TOO HAPPY when I was told about it.)

 

2 of my kids were diagnosed with PDD-NOS. One was when he was 4. I told you about him earlier. One was just recently. He has a language disorder but NOT any sort of autistic spectrum thing. The evaluators were completely biased and saw what they wanted to see. They had him diagnosed before he even came through the door. I plan to go back in a year and have him re-evaluated to get it off his record because he wants to go into the military. I actually was trying to find out how we could get our money back because the whole thing was just so poorly done, but apparently when it comes to medical stuff you're outta luck. What a sham.

 

ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All that's to say where I'm coming from. The testers will not be objective. They also don't know your child. The actual diagnostic criteria are screwed up - and that's not from me, that's from the chair of the committee who actually put the criteria together.:001_huh:

 

I'm not saying you SHOULDN'T have your child evaluated, but just go with your gut. Look at your reasons for wanting him to be evaluated. If you feel he should be, then by all means do it, because there ARE kids who legitimately have autism. But there are TONS of kids who don't, and you need to be aware that you might end up with a misdiagnosis.

 

:grouphug:

[razorbackmama]

I read in Awakening Ashley: Mozart Knocks Autism on Its Ear by Sharon Ruben that a certain percentage of children with autism do get "cured" if they start therapy very young. The Autism Book by Robert Sears points out the same thing. If you have been playing and monitoring your child very closely (or someone else in your child's life has), you may have inadvertently been doing "therapy" for your child, perhaps along the lines of "Floortime" (see Engaging Autism: Using Floortime to Help Children Relate, Communicate and Think by Stanley I. Greenspan and Serena Wieder).

 

"Autism" can also be cured with just time in some kids. (Note the quotes...I'm talking about kids who have been diagnosed but who don't really have it.) My son received almost no therapy, and since I had 4 kids at the time I wasn't able to do a whole lot with him either. So I do agree with you, but some kids also just outgrow the behaviors on their own.

[ktgrok]

 

I've said this before (again and again) on these fora: if it is at all possible for a kid with ASD or ASD tendencies to "fake it until you make it", then I strongly recommend that course (rather than the documented one). Is it harder? You bet. It is exasperating, it takes all of mom's energy, and it involves correction after correction (because the PS beatings aren't really the motivator anymore... thank god). But no doors are closed. Kid can try out for any club, school, or career he wants and feels capable of attending. If I'd insisted on a formal Dx, he couldn't have done that.

 

a

 

Why couldn't a kid with an AS diagnosis join a club or have whatever career he wanted? I've never been asked about autism on a job application.

 

Personally, we kept making excuses and accomadations for my son. Now, at 11, I just can't keep doing that. If there is a better way to help him I want to know what it is. I truly wish we had pursued testing and a diagnosis years ago. I think it would really have helped his self esteem and our relationship.

[Guest]

I think autistic symptoms can wax and wane over long periods of time. Many parents of Aspies find early elementary school a kind of golden period where it seems many symptoms and issues clear up, only to reappear, both academically and socially, in later years when kids' relationships begin to change and the way they play together modulates into early adolescence. The teenage years can be another difficult time, when hormones interact with social aspects of autism. Many adults, Temple Grandin the most well-known of them, figure out a list of coping mechanisms over the years and can appear either lightly impacted or "cured," but they themselves know the continuing difficulties they have.

 

I also like Rupert Isaacson's distinction between what he calls his son's "healing" and being cured. In Horse Boy, he talks about the way his son's most debilitating issues were healed (screaming meltdowns, inability to potty train, inability to speak), but that he remains fundamentally, quirkily autistic.

 

As many others have said, I also believe that kids who demonstrate certain behaviors are diagnosed with autism when they may be reacting to sensory issues, vision problems, etc. The Mislabeled Child clued me in to how vision problems are sometimes mistaken for an autistic inability or unwillingness to look into someone else's eyes.

[8filltheheart]

I think autistic symptoms can wax and wane over long periods of time. Many parents of Aspies find early elementary school a kind of golden period where it seems many symptoms and issues clear up, only to reappear, both academically and socially, in later years when kids' relationships begin to change and the way they play together modulates into early adolescence. The teenage years can be another difficult time, when hormones interact with social aspects of autism. Many adults, Temple Grandin the most well-known of them, figure out a list of coping mechanisms over the years and can appear either lightly impacted or "cured," but they themselves know the continuing difficulties they have.

 

I also like Rupert Isaacson's distinction between what he calls his son's "healing" and being cured. In Horse Boy, he talks about the way his son's most debilitating issues were healed (screaming meltdowns, inability to potty train, inability to speak), but that he remains fundamentally, quirkily autistic.

 

.

 

This describes our ds pretty well. His behaviors were extremely difficult during toddlerhood, less noticeable during elementary (quirky definitely evident, but not as extreme as toddler), golden from ages 10-11. Age 12 started a spiral downward, hitting an all time low around 15-16.

 

Now as an adult, the "mental" aspects are much more evident. Strangers looking at him might think he is quirky. But, we know he is far more disabled now than he appeared in elementary school b/c his mental disabilities (not intelligence....he is very intelligent) are far more debilitating.

 

If you have any question, seek an evaluation. Therapies are more effective in aiding them when they are younger.

[brownie]

Behavioral issues seem to cycle up and down for weeks or months. Also every time we go to get evaluated, ds is nothing but charming...totally not himself. And yet they could still see it. They didn't think I was crazy. They pinpointed things I wasn't even looking at. Gate, inflection,...

Brownie

[asta]

Why couldn't a kid with an AS diagnosis join a club or have whatever career he wanted? I've never been asked about autism on a job application.

 

Personally, we kept making excuses and accomadations for my son. Now, at 11, I just can't keep doing that. If there is a better way to help him I want to know what it is. I truly wish we had pursued testing and a diagnosis years ago. I think it would really have helped his self esteem and our relationship.

 

Kid would be ineligible for the military, many select government jobs that he would seek, and pretty much anything else that required an extensive medical/psych exam. As kid has a background of extensive world travel/living and multiple languages, he cannot dismiss these types of job opportunities.

 

We don't make excuses or accommodations for kid. I've been teaching him since he began to talk with two speech impediments. I had them remediated within a year. I put him in swimming and soccer for gross motor control, and art classes for fine motor control. He learned European cursive as his first handwriting, with an ink pen (not a ballpoint) to learn hand position and pressure. He started an instrument in 4th grade as an outlet for hand stimming. We've taught him how to walk a certain way, stand a certain way, hold his hands a certain way... all of it. Right down to looking at the invisible spot between people's eyebrows or at their nose. If I could have convinced him to attend, I would have had him in acting lessons as well, as they are immensely helpful for navigating (read: faking) new situations.

 

It is possible to operate "normally" and not lose it if someone has taught you how. It is exhausting, but possible. Our entire family tends to spend time together and often at home simply because all of us find crowds of people exhausting. Kid does meet with kids at CAP and scouts and youth group, but those are time-limited activities (which is fine by him). He has increased his time with others as the years have gone by. Yes, adolescence has been harder than childhood, but not undoable. He has to know how to operate even when things suck. The real world doesn't give accommodations.

 

 

a