TrixieB Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 (edited) My cousin's adult child recently got married. I haven't seen my cousin in about five years; it has been longer than that since I've seen my cousin's child. My dh, kids, and I were not invited to the wedding. I was not invited to the bridal shower. Prior to the wedding, I received an email announcement (not an invitation) from my cousin. In this case, I'm pondering whether I should send a gift. Poll is on its way... Edited November 19, 2010 by TrixieB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardening momma Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 I have a cousin who just got married. I live about 2.5 hours away and was not invited. I was not invited to his brother's or his sister's weddings either (neither were my other siblings). It has been very hurtful. We didn't get wedding announcements, either, either before or after the weddings. I don't know about my siblings, but I've decided not to send gifts or cards. In your case, at least you got an announcement. I'd send a card with a $20 gift card in that case. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindergretta Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 I'd send a card. (We didn't have a wedding but we did mail out announcements with a picture of the 2 of us some couple of months later. Maybe wait a bit to see if you get a "real" announcement. If you do, I would consider a small gift card. Otherwise, a simple congratulatory card is sufficient. I do NOT think an email announcement is a "real" announcement. But that just might be me.) I didn't vote b/c I could go with either of the first two, depending on if you ever receive any real communication from these folks. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 Well, I guess the best etiquette is card. I'd be tempted to not really do anything because though related, if I haven't seen or heard from someone in five years or more and then the only way I hear about a major life event is an email, then I'd probably just send a congratulatory email back since there wasn't even the courtesy of a written announcement in the mail. But, an inexpensive card is fine. I would not feel obliged to send a gift. Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 You got an email announcement. Send an e-card. :D Seriously, I think that's perfectly in line with the communication route they've chosen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rwjx2khsmj Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 I may be the scrooge here. I haven't read any of the other responders. If I have no relationship with someone, I don't send a gift or a card or any kind of acknowledgement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 You got an email announcement. Send an e-card. :D Seriously, I think that's perfectly in line with the communication route they've chosen. LOL! I like this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lionfamily1999 Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 My cousin's adult child recently got married. I haven't seen my cousin in about five years; it has been longer than that since I've seen my cousin's child. My dh, kids, and I were not invited to the wedding. I was not invited to the bridal shower. Prior to the wedding, I received an email announcement (not an invitation) from my cousin. In this case, I'm pondering whether I should send a gift. Poll is on its way... Well, you were the adult in this equation, so if there's been distance since childhood then ... well... whose fault was that? Why should she have invited you? You can keep the distances between you and not even reply. Or, you could send her something that you think every newlywed couple needs and a card. Maybe the two of you could build a relationship now, or at the very least you could keep from making the gap wider. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 I don't think a gift is necessary. Not sure a card even is either! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 You got an email announcement. Send an e-card. :D Seriously, I think that's perfectly in line with the communication route they've chosen. This isn't a bad idea. They would have been better off spending money on card and stamp. :D Change in culture; go with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sebastian (a lady) Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 My cousin's adult child recently got married. I haven't seen my cousin in about five years; it has been longer than that since I've seen my cousin's child. My dh, kids, and I were not invited to the wedding. I was not invited to the bridal shower. Prior to the wedding, I received an email announcement (not an invitation) from my cousin. In this case, I'm pondering whether I should send a gift. Poll is on its way... I see no reason not to send a nice card with a hand written note. Maybe with a sweet comment about how you remember your cousin as a bride or remember the bride/groom as a young child and hope that they have a lovely, happy marriage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 I am not sure I would get a gift. Perhaps a card? Did that cousin come to your wedding? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 Maybe they were not able to afford a large wedding and therefore did not invite everyone they may have wanted. If you like them and are happy for them, send a small gift card. If you're not really that close, then I don't think you need to feel obligated to send anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama2Many4 Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 I voted other and would send a response email with a congratulations. That's it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 19, 2010 Share Posted November 19, 2010 A very tasteful card. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.