Brilliant Posted October 23, 2010 Share Posted October 23, 2010 For 14 years, we have lived out of state from our families, so we've always done our own thing. We've developed our own traditions over the years, and for the last 6 years we've celebrated Christmas by traveling to the mountains. And we all love it. Snow, sledding, hot chocolate, fire burning brightly in the fireplace, etc. My kids came to me a couple of weeks ago with a plan to stay home. :huh: I sort of brushed them off, thinking to myself, "No way!" But I know they'll bring it up again. They are 14 and 17. They said they still love our Christmas tradition, but just want to try something different - stay home, maybe have some friends over, actually get to play the new Wii games, etc. I can't imagine anything worse than having internet access on Christmas day. So what would you do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenhwyfar Posted October 23, 2010 Share Posted October 23, 2010 why not let them make the call this year? you've done the cabin thing for six years ~ they're older now and want to try something different. what can it hurt? :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaAkins Posted October 23, 2010 Share Posted October 23, 2010 How about staying home for Christmas and making a trip to the mountains a few days later? That sounds like it would be the best of both worlds to me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted October 23, 2010 Share Posted October 23, 2010 How about staying home for Christmas and making a trip to the mountains a few days later? That sounds like it would be the best of both worlds to me! This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mallorie Posted October 23, 2010 Share Posted October 23, 2010 I would not let them make this call. I would consider their feelings, but ultimately, it would be up to dh and myself. You can have wii and friends the rest of the year. I'd be hard pressed to let the tradition of going to the mountains go. JMO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clarkacademy Posted October 23, 2010 Share Posted October 23, 2010 I think you should stick with tradition. That has been something you do every year and they may be a bit disapointed but as an adult they are going to look back and have really great memories. Holiday is family time not time to play on the computer or video games it is time to make treasured memories. Once I got older my parents let me do my own thing I never thought much of it at the time looking back I missed our family time. I should have stayed home instead of those parties and friends get togethers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melinda in VT Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 :grouphug: It sounds to me like your kids are trying to gently tell you that they don't love the tradition as much as they used to. Your oldest is not that far away from living away from your home. And therefore getting to choose whether to spend holidays with you or not. I think it would be a good idea to start adopting a collaborative attitude about holiday plans. I'd sit down and share your concerns--you want a quieter Christmas, you want to make sure there's lots of family time--and then work to come up with some guidelines for spending a Christmas at home. Maybe keep Christmas a family-only day and invite friends over on the 26th? Agree to stay off the internet on Christmas? Go to the mountains for New Year's Eve instead? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebug42 Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 I would stay home for Christmas and then maybe go to the mountains after. I understand those that say it is your call, not theirs but it is also their holiday. I think they approached it well and they should get some say in it as well. I think my holiday would be tainted by the fact that I knew my kids didn't want to be there if I went to the mountains anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EarleneW Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 I agree with the stay home and go to the mountains a few days later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenL Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 :grouphug: It sounds to me like your kids are trying to gently tell you that they don't love the tradition as much as they used to. Your oldest is not that far away from living away from your home. And therefore getting to choose whether to spend holidays with you or not. I think it would be a good idea to start adopting a collaborative attitude about holiday plans. I'd sit down and share your concerns--you want a quieter Christmas, you want to make sure there's lots of family time--and then work to come up with some guidelines for spending a Christmas at home. Maybe keep Christmas a family-only day and invite friends over on the 26th? Agree to stay off the internet on Christmas? Go to the mountains for New Year's Eve instead? :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 I wouldn't want to stay home with computers and friends. I would take them to the mountains for family time. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeckyFL Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 I would let them make the call absolutely. They don't have much longer at home. If they would like to have some "Christmas time at home memories", I would do it in a heartbeat! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 I would have everyone (including both parents) list what is most important to them about Christmas (prompt them for ideas on food, activities, people etc). Then review it all with an open mind. Sometimes little things that are important to kids are not to parents and vice versa. Then try to craft a Holiday that includes as much of the important traditions or new traditions as possible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 I make plans to get together at someone else's home for all big holiday meals because I hate cooking them. I know, it's pathetic! If we stay home it's all sausages, cheeses, olives, fruits, rolls, and pies. I. am. not. kidding! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brilliant Posted October 24, 2010 Author Share Posted October 24, 2010 I read some of the replies and then broached the subject at dinner. Dh felt as I did - that we don't want to forgo the memories/tradition entirely. But we didn't come to a decision about go or no go. I appreciate all the replies - although I admit that when I read the suggestions to let the kids decide - I thought, "I only want replies that agree with my wants!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jilly Posted October 24, 2010 Share Posted October 24, 2010 Every year we have always spent Christmas at my parent's house in Lake Arrowhead. Last year I just wanted to stay home and have Christmas at our house. It was nice, and I am glad the kids and I experienced it. But we all missed the snow, cold weather, and everything else that seems to say Christmas to us. This year we will be in the mountains for Christmas, and I can't wait! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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