I am having the worst time obeying my husband - selling books

[momee]

Can you relate? I have been asked respectfully to rid myself of our old curricula. I am having the worst time doing so because it took years to accumulate those books. (he's not an ogre, just trying to help me be free of a temptation to return - this isn't about him :)

 

He did say we should keep the ones we'd all like to reread or use for later learning - but even that is hard to pick through and choose. How do I sell my beloved copy of something like THe Gift of Music - haha bad example, we read like, what, one chapter two years ago?

 

Anyway, the real deal is what if I change my mind? (DH says no way for the sake of our mental health). And want to go back to that curricula that burnt me out so much, hee hee.

 

I paid for them plus shipping from Amazon and it seems people want them practically for nothing, kwim? I feel guilty about spending so much money on them and recouping much less.

 

Agh. We need the money so I have to sell them, we need the space, and I need the freedom of being released from something that wasn't good for us, but ouch. I don't like the job of selling them one bit.

 

I won't even go into the utter work involved in a few of the sales, multiple phone calls even for people to then change their mind or ask for an even further reduction in price. It's tiring.

 

It hurts everytime I pack up a bunch of them.

 

Rant over.:tongue_smilie:

Edited May 17, 2010 by momee

[Mergath]

If you feel like you'd be selling them for almost nothing, could you perhaps donate your favorites to your local library? That way you could still read them whenever you wanted, and others would be able to get the same joy from them that your family has.

[Julie in CA]

I'm just finishing a major book purge. It was a lot of work, and I was surprised that I was emotional about some of it. Getting rid of the books that I liked a lot, but which didn't work for our family was especially difficult. Finally giving up on the idea that we would sit around and do read-alouds as a family at this point was difficult. It was part of my best times with my dc *ever*. They're older now though, and it's time for me to be real about what they need. My books about what to read to children...gone. As much as I love using a hands-on approach to science, my dc *love* to have textbooks for that. So that really cool experimental/experiential science course...gone. Why am I hanging onto that 4th grade grammar when my youngest dc is almost 12? Gone.

 

I went through and picked out the things that I knew would sell for enough money to be worth the time & effort of selling. The rest went into bins/crates, and I took it along to a local homeschool meeting. I tried not to wince as I let the ladies have free reign. My only requirement of them was that they not look at the abundance of unused materials and ask me, "WHY?" "Why do you have so much that you didn't USE?" :blush:

 

A lot of it went that way. I emailed other homeschooling friends, and had a little "open house" and gave away more of it then. I had to part with some beloved stuff, but at least I got to have a fun afternoon with my friends in the process! :)

 

My last step will be to post an ad on Freecycle.com for the leftovers. Someone will absolutely take the remainder away. I haven't done this last part yet, because I have one or two more friends who'd like to look first.

 

I've been able to bless lots of people throughout the process, and truly, if you focus on how stupid it really is to have so many curriculum "mistakes" hanging around, how embarrassing it is to be a hoarder, and how freeing it is to know that you finally have it under control, you'll get through it. :grouphug:

[elegantlion]

Have you looked to see if any of them are wanted on the amazon buy back program? It's hit or miss but check by ISBN and under the price will be a listed for used prices and if available how much they will pay for your copy. They are required to be in good condition and a few other criteria, but the shipping is free. I've made $15.00 off of three books recently. I might have made a little more upfront by selling two of them, but that would have been eaten up in the cost of shipping.

 

the only bad part (not for me, but maybe according to your dh) is that the money is paid in amazon gift card. Feeding the habit. :lol:

[Blueridge]

You don't have TOG volume 4, do you? If so, I would happily give it a happy home, and you could come and visit it anytime you like! Blessings to you...I know how hard it is. I gave away tons of books and curriculum when we moved here, and sometimes I find myself searching for something that I later remember I gave away. :tongue_smilie: You might ask your dh is you should keep some things for reference material down the road.

[plansrme]

It never bothers me to get rid of anything if it is MY decision to do so.

 

If it were my husband "telling" me to get rid of something, or telling me not to talk about oh, say, past curriculum choices, yeah, that would bother me. So would serving the jail sentence I would surely receive for beating the snot out of him with the heaviest book in my arsenal, but so be it.

 

 

While you say it's not about him, if it were your decision, perhaps it wouldn't bother you so much.

 

Terri

[May]

I hear you:) Parting with my old curriculum and never used stuff made me realize those years are gone forever. My feelings were the same when I gave away my youngest dd baby clothes. I still feel a little bit sad.:crying:

[momee]

Yes. Same way with the baby clothes. I cried and cried. I actually got rid of some toys that my kids later were like - what? You gave away all our Barbie stuff, and my son is still mad I gave away his Star Trek set with action figures. I mean, mom, where can you buy that stuff now?

 

And to the poster about my hubbie, he knows if it sits around, it will taunt me. He is one smart and experienced homeschool dad, not to mention, the most loving person EVER!

 

"don't you want me back...remember when we used to...what are your kids doing now without me? nothing!"

It really will shout stuff like that if I keep it here :) so it must go and he knows me well enough to know it would say that to me. It's all about protection really :)

 

Just playin around but to a homeschool mom, this stuff is real life, isn't it :D

 

Thanks for the commiseration, and what great ideas here~~~you gals are brilliant!

[Guest Dulcimeramy]

When my husband suggested that I get rid of some of my books, I suggested that he sell some of his tools. At least, he should sell the tools that he's nearly worn out, or the tools that he's not 100% sure he'll need again.

 

If your husband is in construction, turning the tables will put it all in the proper perspective and he'll never bring it up again.

[Parrothead]

It never bothers me to get rid of anything if it is MY decision to do so.

 

If it were my husband "telling" me to get rid of something, or telling me not to talk about oh, say, past curriculum choices, yeah, that would bother me. So would serving the jail sentence I would surely receive for beating the snot out of him with the heaviest book in my arsenal, but so be it.

 

 

While you say it's not about him, if it were your decision, perhaps it wouldn't bother you so much.

 

Terri

I have a feeling the whole story isn't about him telling her to get rid of stuff randomly. But if it were I'd have to :iagree:wholeheartedly.

When my husband suggested that I get rid of some of my books, I suggested that he sell some of his tools. At least, he should sell the tools that he's nearly worn out, or the tools that he's not 100% sure he'll need again.

 

If your husband is in construction, turning the tables will put it all in the proper perspective and he'll never bring it up again.

:lol:

[elegantlion]

When my husband suggested that I get rid of some of my books, I suggested that he sell some of his tools. At least, he should sell the tools that he's nearly worn out, or the tools that he's not 100% sure he'll need again.

 

If your husband is in construction, turning the tables will put it all in the proper perspective and he'll never bring it up again.

 

Oh, yeah that works great. Dh has his own garage!! Obviously it's his business, but mine is homeschooling. He never brings up how much I spend and my stuff only takes up one room.

[asta]

Ask your kids.

 

My kid doesn't care about a lot of his curricula, but there is some of it that he insists. must. stay.

 

Wanna know why?

 

He says he may want to use it for his own kids... :lol:

 

Everything else can go. It's just stuff. Stuff ties you to earth. What good is that?

 

 

a

[TCoppock]

I haven't been able to part with any of my old material. I think for me it has more to do with the acceptance that there will be no more children in my future than an actual attachment to the material. There is actually one program that I loathed and even that I keep just in case.:glare: I still have 10yo DS crib, highchair, etc. in storage because I just can't bare the thought of parting with it. In my mind I know I could have paid for a whole new nursery multiple times, but in my heart I am able to rationalize the keeping of it. So many times it is more the emotions attached to the item rather than the item itself.

[Rosie_0801]

When my husband suggested that I get rid of some of my books, I suggested that he sell some of his tools. At least, he should sell the tools that he's nearly worn out, or the tools that he's not 100% sure he'll need again.

 

If your husband is in construction, turning the tables will put it all in the proper perspective and he'll never bring it up again.

 

 

We used to have this conversation about computer cords. I argue that a book I don't want to get rid of has more use than an electrical cord for the printer we no longer have. Would you believe it though? The cheeky fella cleaned out his computer cord stash and now I can't use that argument anymore!

 

:lol:

Rosie

[Rhondabee]

I went through and, if the library had a copy already, I donated our copy to the library. That way I knew I would have access to it if I wanted it. Some others were boxed up and put in the attic. If they're still there in a few years, I won't even open the boxes, just take them to directly to the library. The hassle of trying to sell and deal with postage it just too stressful to me, though obviously some people thrive on it (for which my budget is extremely thankful!).

 

Could you compromise somehow that way?

 

Hope you're still all enjoying your new stuff!

 

(And, thank you for sharing with honesty and grace your journey. I knew from "watching" you from a distance that starting Year 2 in your old curriculum while trying to work (even very) part-time would *not* be in my best interest next year even tho' there is that tiny voice inside of me that whispers I should have tried.)

 

Blessings~

[Just Another Jen]

When my husband suggested that I get rid of some of my books, I suggested that he sell some of his tools. At least, he should sell the tools that he's nearly worn out, or the tools that he's not 100% sure he'll need again.

 

If your husband is in construction, turning the tables will put it all in the proper perspective and he'll never bring it up again.

 

:iagree: I know that reasoning would work here. :D

[LisaKinVA]

I don't plan to keep all of the various kids' books once all of ours are grown, BUT, I don't want to keep them forever, either. We plan to ask the children which one(s) they want, and they can take them to their houses! Whatever they don't want... we'll donate.

 

Curriculum/textbooks, I try to sell as I can -- I don't see any reason to keep a copy of a history book for grandchildren I won't have for 20 years or so ('cause until the baby is gone, the curriculum is staying!)

[lovemyboys]

Nice advice, Julie.

 

I've always given away what we outgrew, didn't use or didn't like. Then this year decided to sell it locally (a little online). But overall it's more effort than it's worth for most of it. Only the newest, nicest, most popular things sell for much. The rest, people want for a bargain.

 

So I try to keep that in mind when pricing. If I've hauled boxes to a curriculum sale, I don't want to just haul them home again. So you price to sell.

 

If you've got intact curric. from one of the big names, I'd look for avenues to reach those users (sonlight, abeka, tog, whatever) to make a reasonable amount of money. In my case, the curric. is an eclectic mix so again, not a big revenue opportunity.

 

Good luck. Like Julie said, you'll feel freer and lighter for the effort. :001_smile:

 

I'm just finishing a major book purge. It was a lot of work, and I was surprised that I was emotional about some of it. Getting rid of the books that I liked a lot, but which didn't work for our family was especially difficult. Finally giving up on the idea that we would sit around and do read-alouds as a family at this point was difficult. It was part of my best times with my dc *ever*. They're older now though, and it's time for me to be real about what they need. My books about what to read to children...gone. As much as I love using a hands-on approach to science, my dc *love* to have textbooks for that. So that really cool experimental/experiential science course...gone. Why am I hanging onto that 4th grade grammar when my youngest dc is almost 12? Gone.

 

I went through and picked out the things that I knew would sell for enough money to be worth the time & effort of selling. The rest went into bins/crates, and I took it along to a local homeschool meeting. I tried not to wince as I let the ladies have free reign. My only requirement of them was that they not look at the abundance of unused materials and ask me, "WHY?" "Why do you have so much that you didn't USE?" :blush:

 

A lot of it went that way. I emailed other homeschooling friends, and had a little "open house" and gave away more of it then. I had to part with some beloved stuff, but at least I got to have a fun afternoon with my friends in the process! :)

 

My last step will be to post an ad on Freecycle.com for the leftovers. Someone will absolutely take the remainder away. I haven't done this last part yet, because I have one or two more friends who'd like to look first.

 

I've been able to bless lots of people throughout the process, and truly, if you focus on how stupid it really is to have so many curriculum "mistakes" hanging around, how embarrassing it is to be a hoarder, and how freeing it is to know that you finally have it under control, you'll get through it. :grouphug: