sleepymommy Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 Eek! So, the kids and I were driving down the road and ds1 starts asking about babies and such. He's done this before, but it's usually, how did I get out of you tummy. But today it was how did I get in?! I've known he would ask one day, I just didn't think he would at 5 yrs old! I told him that was a really great question, and I just needed a little time to put together and really good answer. He kept asking, and then he asked if God put him there. I said 'yes', and then I said 'well kind of', and then I said God helped his dad and I have him because we wanted him. But then the "but how?" part came back up! Well thankfully, after a couple of minutes of me saying "um", he said that it was a really good answer and dropped the subject.:lol: So how do you guys handle this? Is there some magical way to make them never again ask until their older?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 At that age, I tell them that "God has designed it so that the Mommy has a special kind of egg inside of her. The Dad provides a special kind of seed. Then that grows into a baby inside the mom's womb." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BikeBookBread Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 My 5 yo has started asking questions, more specifically why I'm NOT having a baby. (She has lots of friends with younger parents who are having babies...we're ahem, older, and DONE.) I have books from Navpress but haven't had the guts to pull them out. I've read them through a bit, though, and one of the lines they use is some like this: "it takes a little part of mommy and a little part of daddy to make a baby." Later in the series, the "how it gets there" is taught. AACK! Why do we as parents worry about this so much? I DO! It shouldn't freak us out, but it does! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 My kids have known the age appropriate truth all their lives. At 5, I'd tell him: God made Mommy and Daddy's bodies to fit together. A part from Daddy fits in Mommy and a seed from Daddy meets an egg from Mommy and a baby grows. I used more explicit terms (p*nis and v*gina, egg and sperm). I also included that God made married adults want to spend special time together with their bodies that kids don't spend; it's a wonderful part of being married. Knowledge of procreative biology is important, at any age. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BikeBookBread Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 My kids have known the age appropriate truth all their lives. At 5, I'd tell him: God made Mommy and Daddy's bodies to fit together. A part from Daddy fits in Mommy and a seed from Daddy meets an egg from Mommy and a baby grows. I used more explicit terms (p*nis and v*gina, egg and sperm). I also included that God made married adults want to spend special time together with their bodies that kids don't spend; it's a wonderful part of being married. Knowledge of procreative biology is important, at any age. I'm ALL for teaching body part names from the get-go. None of this made-up name stuff for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jujsky Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I went through this a couple months ago with my DS(5 at the time) as well. I told him a very simplified version of the truth. I also explained to him that he was obviously old enough to know because he asked, but that his little sisters and his friends haven't asked yet, so he shouldn't bring up the subject to them. I said if it ever comes up, he needs to tell the other kids to ask their moms. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 A seed from Daddy got together with an egg from Mummy and made you. (This explanation may be followed by a gap, ranging from thirty seconds to five years) How did the seed get together with the egg? The seed is called sperm and it comes from Daddy's willie. The egg was inside Mummy, so Daddy put his willie inside Mummy's vagina so that the sperm could swim up inside and find the egg. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catalinakel Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 My kids have known the age appropriate truth all their lives. At 5, I'd tell him: God made Mommy and Daddy's bodies to fit together. A part from Daddy fits in Mommy and a seed from Daddy meets an egg from Mommy and a baby grows. I used more explicit terms (p*nis and v*gina, egg and sperm). I also included that God made married adults want to spend special time together with their bodies that kids don't spend; it's a wonderful part of being married. Knowledge of procreative biology is important, at any age. I agree Joanne. I have answered their questions as they come. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spy Car Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I am so not ready to have this discussion with my 5 year-old, or with any of you for that matter :D Bill (never Willie :tongue_smilie:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaSheep Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I've answered questions as they come too. I kind of figure if the child is old enough to ask the question, they're old enough to have a real answer. I use correct "medical" names for anatomical parts. I do try to give an answer that is at about the same maturity level as the question, though, and to make sure that kids know that sex is a special, important topic that should not be joked about and something that kids should talk to their parents about, not to other kids who might not know as much. Ds knew pretty much the whole story by the time he was about 4--he's always been a bit of a deep thinker, and ponders the hard questions of the universe. When he was little one of those questions was about how bodies actually work, and another was how do babies get made. I found it easier to discuss with him then than it is now; back then it was just information to him, just like how food goes in one end, mucks around a bit in the stomach and intestines, and comes out as poop on the other end. Oh, well, that's interesting. Now tell me about respiration. Now there's all kinds of emotional baggage attached for him and it's hard for him to ask questions, and sometimes harder for him to sit and listen to the answers. Dd doesn't know all the particulars yet, but she does know that girls have eggs, but the eggs wait until girls are older before they get ready to make babies and they're stored in special little pouches called ovaries inside the girl's tummy until the girl's body is old enough. She knows that it takes a special thing called a sperm that is made in the daddy's body to make the egg grow into a baby and that the eggs in a girl cannot become babies without a sperm from the daddy (after seeing her own little eggs on an ultrasound, she was worried that they could "accidentally" turn into babies before she was ready so we discussed a lot of this then). She also knows that people have special body parts (and she knows what they look like and what they're called) that are used for making babies and that they are so special that nobody should be allowed to touch them or play with them except that a child's mom or dad can help the child keep them clean until the child is old enough to do that alone, and a parent or doctor can check the parts to see if they are healthy, or to answer a child's questions about them. Also, husbands and wives share their special body parts with each other after they are married. But she hasn't asked yet how the sperm gets to the egg, or in what ways married people share their special parts with each other, so I have not yet told her that part. Funny story, though. When dd was about 2 years old ds started asking when we were going to have another child (he would have been about 7 at the time). We told him that we weren't sure, since Mom's body doesn't always work the way it's supposed to it's hard for us to predict these things, so we'd just have to wait and see if Heavenly Father sent us another brother or sister or not. He looked me straight in the eye and said, in a sincere tone obviously meant to be helpful, "Well, maybe if you and Dad had sex every night, that would increase our chances." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 You're too funny, Bill! I'm not either. Shall we chat about the weather? :o Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BikeBookBread Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 He looked me straight in the eye and said, in a sincere tone obviously meant to be helpful, "Well, maybe if you and Dad had sex every night, that would increase our chances." Maybe his dad put him up to it :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jubulibee Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 Funny story, though. When dd was about 2 years old ds started asking when we were going to have another child (he would have been about 7 at the time). We told him that we weren't sure, since Mom's body doesn't always work the way it's supposed to it's hard for us to predict these things, so we'd just have to wait and see if Heavenly Father sent us another brother or sister or not. He looked me straight in the eye and said, in a sincere tone obviously meant to be helpful, "Well, maybe if you and Dad had sex every night, that would increase our chances." That makes so much sense coming from your Aspie son! My ds11 is aspie, and I can so imagine him saying that kind of stuff! My ds 5 has been very specific about his questions (HOW did daddy's seed get inside mommy?). I also am of the mindset to be honest and open about it, and they will have a healthier attitude. So I explained it. He was sleepy that time, and so didn't go any further with it. However, we were reading about lions in science the other day, and he asked how lion daddies make the babies with the mommy lions. I said, "Remember the other day when I told you how [and I went on to explain it again]." He slapped his forehead, and said emphatically, "I will NEVER do that to Amelia!" (Amelia is the name of a friend that he has always said he would marry.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaik76 Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I am so not ready to have this discussion with my 5 year-old, or with any of you for that matter :D Bill (never Willie :tongue_smilie:) :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaSheep Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 Maybe his dad put him up to it :) HAHAahaha! You should have SEEN dh's face. It was priceless! That makes so much sense coming from your Aspie son! My ds11 is aspie, and I can so imagine him saying that kind of stuff! Oh, it was TOTALLY an Aspie moment. We had talked about how he should only discuss these things with his parents, but silly me, I somehow had forgotten to mention that it was not considered socially acceptable table conversation, even if it's just the family at the table, and that the specifics of other people's sex lives are private, just between those people, EVEN if they are your parents. We had a little chat after dinner. My ds 5 has been very specific about his questions (HOW did daddy's seed get inside mommy?). I also am of the mindset to be honest and open about it, and they will have a healthier attitude. So I explained it. He was sleepy that time, and so didn't go any further with it. However, we were reading about lions in science the other day, and he asked how lion daddies make the babies with the mommy lions. I said, "Remember the other day when I told you how [and I went on to explain it again]." He slapped his forehead, and said emphatically, "I will NEVER do that to Amelia!" (Amelia is the name of a friend that he has always said he would marry.) ROFL!! My son has asked my why on earth anyone would WANT to do THAT. I just told him that it feels good and kinda left it at that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 I am so not ready to have this discussion with my 5 year-old, or with any of you for that matter :D Bill (never Willie :tongue_smilie:) :lol: You crack me up, Bill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted September 30, 2009 Share Posted September 30, 2009 Funny story, though. When dd was about 2 years old ds started asking when we were going to have another child (he would have been about 7 at the time). We told him that we weren't sure, since Mom's body doesn't always work the way it's supposed to it's hard for us to predict these things, so we'd just have to wait and see if Heavenly Father sent us another brother or sister or not. He looked me straight in the eye and said, in a sincere tone obviously meant to be helpful, "Well, maybe if you and Dad had sex every night, that would increase our chances." :lol: I had all of mine tell me that we can stop with the sex already, that they have more than enough siblings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sleepymommy Posted September 30, 2009 Author Share Posted September 30, 2009 I am so not ready to have this discussion with my 5 year-old, or with any of you for that matter :D Bill (never Willie :tongue_smilie:) :rofl::rofl: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sleepymommy Posted October 1, 2009 Author Share Posted October 1, 2009 The main reason I don't want to tell him about the 'actions' dh and I must undertake in order to have kids, is because I know the very next question would be but 'how does the sperm get to the egg, and then what happens, and then what happens,etc". But I'm sure it would be preceded with "but why do you fit together, can I fit together with xyz (whoever the current girl he wants to marry is). And on and on. Ugh, I just want him to ask his dad!!:svengo::leaving: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nmoira Posted October 1, 2009 Share Posted October 1, 2009 I am so not ready to have this discussion with my 5 year-old, or with any of you for that matter :D Bill (never Willie :tongue_smilie:) Had to wipe a bit of beer of the monitor. For the best... it needed to be dusted anyway. We're also big on correct terminology. I had the discussion with DD the Elder at 3-ish. Her younger sister (5) is content to leave Daddy out of it thus far... though she's seen the mandrills at the zoo copulate often enough she might already have made the connection -- she only asked about them the once and since has preferred to narrate for the benefit of other zoo-goers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IsabelC Posted October 1, 2009 Share Posted October 1, 2009 (edited) I pretty much just tell them about reproduction the same way I tell them about digestion or any other part of human biology. Doesn't stop them asking again, though, and the questions just get more involved as they get older, and then of course you have to address the wider ramifications about social norms, ethical considerations and religious beliefs. (My dd aged 4 is currently having trouble understanding why she can't have a baby with her brother. I explained that we don't have that sort of relationship with our siblings etc etc, and I thought she was fine with it, until she got the 'lightbulb' look on her face and said "oh that's ok, I'll just ask Daddy to give me a sperm"! so obviously she needs some more time to understand.) Edited October 1, 2009 by Hotdrink Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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