Alison in KY Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 I'm dreading starting school because I feel like I have to jump through hoops to pacify everyone. My oldest, 10, cannot focus to save his life, plus he needs quiet to do his work....of course that means everyone quiet with me sitting by his side still telling him to keep focused on his work. Anyone else have one of these? When will he outgrow this, it would be so much easier to have him working on things while I'm working with the other two...but as it is I basically have to do him alone and then do the other two? I'm just whining and a bit frustrated. Sorry. Alison Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 I wish my oldest had outgrown that. Today, I left her at home to work on algebra while I took everyone else to the doctor, and out to lunch and to the mall. In 6 1/2 hours, she ALMOST finished a lesson. Fortunately, my other kids have learned to work independently very well. We just keep doing the best we can. I feel for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 Let's see time for a few games of solitaire, reading a magazine, the Bible, ... mine doesn't get distracted by what I am doing as I sit there but if anyone else walks in the room it's all over. I've started having him do a couple of problems and then check in. That seems to help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaTanya Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 :grouphug: I have great hopes and dreams for future independent work -- I just don't know when it will happen! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 I have a child who has a hard time staying on task, however, he is still very independent. This year, I am doing a "school store" as an incentive for him to stay on task and not interrupt his brother or HIMSELF during school. He starts the day with a certain amount of $ (pretend money to be used in my store of goodies - things like gum, candy, pencils, highlighters, etc). If he is caught interrupting or veering off task, he gets a warning. The second time, he loses a set amount of money. If he keeps it up, he can lose the entire day's cash. Thus far, the most he has lost is half. It is helping...he has somehing to work for. Also, I notice that, as his work gets more time consuming and challenging, he has less time to goof off. He does several subjects with me (Heart of Dakota kind of plans it this way in the manual he is using this year), then takes a 15 minute break. Then he does several subjects on is own, another 15 minute break, and finishes his work by himself. It is working so well this year. He will be 10 on Wednesday. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 My going into the 3rd grade, 8 1/2yr old, has to have me sitting by him every minute. This year I am going to start a reward system for when he does certain things independently. Like he gets an extra $.05 per subject per day towards his 'pay check' at the end of the month. With that I will have a deduction system of, yup, $.05 per subject per day if he doesn't do the things independently that I know he can. This works with his chores. He might not be happy some days but we all go to work a little disgruntled at times, but he does them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 I took up knitting. Really. My 12 year old twins get easily distracted if I walk away. Well they are not so bad anymore, but from ages 8 to 11... oh my. Anyway, I keep a knitting basket right next to the school table and I have managed to complete a number of scarves over a couple of years of math lessons! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PollyOR Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 My 11yo has a hard time. She gets up early and tries to get as much done as possible before the others start stirring. When 7yo wakes up, she watches PBS shows with a wireless headset while waiting for her turn with mom. I have to sit with her during lessons and it is almost a form of torture. :crying: Thankfully the 14yo is independent. :Angel_anim: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 I'm dreading starting school because I feel like I have to jump through hoops to pacify everyone. My oldest, 10, cannot focus to save his life, plus he needs quiet to do his work....of course that means everyone quiet with me sitting by his side still telling him to keep focused on his work. Anyone else have one of these? When will he outgrow this, it would be so much easier to have him working on things while I'm working with the other two...but as it is I basically have to do him alone and then do the other two? I'm just whining and a bit frustrated. Sorry. Alison Well, perhaps I can offer some hope because this year, finally, my 13yo doesn't need me as much as he has in the past. In fact, I have started cleaning house and catching up on things while the kids do their schoolwork because they are both able to do most of it independently. Previously my son needed me a lot- and at age 10, yep, a real lot! I would try and get curricula that allows him some independence...but then count your blessings that he is homeschooling because in school, he probably wouldnt do well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alison in KY Posted August 4, 2009 Author Share Posted August 4, 2009 Thank you ladies, it's so helpful to read these posts. I like the money and store idea, everyone would love that one here. I gave him a 5 min. math drill yesterday and I knew it would take over 5 minutes because he's still working on his multiplication facts, but taking over 30 minutes because he's sipping his water, cleaning his fingernails with his pencil, writing on top of his fingernail, erasing the writing on his fingernail, and then yelling at everyone because they are too loud for him to do his work :glare: In some ways I might be shooting myself in the foot...but because he naturally isn't independent and he's the oldest the programs I use usually involve me. We're all using HOD's Beyond package for history, science, and Bible. But we also use WWE, AAS, and he's using Lively Latin...which I thought he could do independently but somehow he can read directions and never really understands what to do:tongue_smilie:. He's no dummy, he can somehow remember all of these gun models, all of this information about bullet sizes, motorcycles, etc....but nope, not when it comes down to anything I'm doing with him. Anyway, I would like to take things lighter on him and play games, but I'm not so creative (or fun) but I actually feel like I need to be increasing his schoolwork...beefing things up. He's one of the older kids because we started really slowly when he was 5, so he's a 10 yr old going into 4th grade..which is okay by me, but I think he should be doing something equal to other 4th graders. Thanks so much for the encouragement. Alison Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 My 12 1/2 yo is finally getting somewhat better. But yesterday I gave her some history reading to do and she ending up napping. I am hoping this next year will be the turning point and she will become independent. As least she was independent at swim and dive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EKS Posted August 4, 2009 Share Posted August 4, 2009 I worked specifically on this behavior (and this is with a kid with an official ADHD diagnosis). When my younger son started K with us a few years ago, I needed to get my then 6th grader to work on his own, without me sitting next to him pointing at the paper every two seconds. I did it by making him leave the room and giving him a time limit. So, we would do, say a math lesson together for 10-15 minutes and then he would go to another part of the house to do the problems on his own. He had to get the work done in a certain amount of time or no screen time that day. He learned how to do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alison in KY Posted August 4, 2009 Author Share Posted August 4, 2009 Good plan EKS! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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