Yes, he emailed the profs directly, with a subject line that said something like "Passionate high schooler hopes to meet you re literature" or philosophy or film or whatever. I think he attached a resume, which they never read. We did not go through admissions. In the beginning, I called admissions to ask what the procedure would be, and they all said we were free to set it up ourselves. Oberlin, Wesleyan and Yale profs were all eager and enthusiastic to meet, and DS had great discussions with them. They all said they had no connection to admissions, but he wasn't meeting with them to get an in on admissions. He just wanted to talk to the profs about their work to get a feel for the kind of intellectual environment that existed on campus. We only had 2 disappointments. Hampshire faculty did not return his emails, even after I called the film department and asked the administrative assistant if there was a particular procedure DS should follow. A Hampshire administrator did agree to meet, but DS said it was not very interesting as the administrator had stopped his own academic work years ago. At Columbia, one prof actually scolded DS in her response, saying that 30,000 students apply and faculty can't be bothered to meet with prospective students. We scratched those two schools off his list. We decided that this approach really showed the relationship between faculty and students, and the level of accessibility (or lack thereof) the students have to faculty. Good luck!! Maria

This NYT article from last fall addresses this trend. This approach is inexplicable to me. A student can only go to one school. Like others, I find this trend and the cavalier approach troubling. These students are playing games with peoples' futures. http://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/16/nyregion/applications-by-the-dozen-as-anxious-students-hedge-college-bets.html Maria

Be prepared-- these college visits could be great material for college app essays, if you are organized. Here's what happened to us: Last spring my oldest DD did college visits with my husband. Several weeks before each visit we looked through the department faculty lists on the uni websites and he picked 2-3 profs he wanted to talk to. He emailed the profs, explained he would be on campus, and said he would love to get together to talk about the prof's work. DS read thru the CVs of the profs on the way to the schools. The faculty at almost every school was very welcoming. At his dream school he met with a Lit prof, and had a long conversation about the prof's most recent studies, and DS's most recent interests. It was a very spirited discussion, with both DS and the prof writing down ideas and notes. The prof recommended DS read a book by James Agee, so DS texted me to get that book for him. A few weeks later DS was back in that area, visiting a different school. He had read the book, emailed the prof and asked to stop by again, and the prof said, great! So DS and the lit prof had a second good conversation. DS was thrilled that he was having intellectually interesting talks with possible future professors. It was a very, very positive experience. In the fall as he wrote his applications, his dream school had a separate essay question that was something like, "Tell us about an interesting interaction or conversation you have had in the last year." So DS wrote about his conversations with that school's lit prof. And he got in. And the thing is, because he was talking to faculty, he never had time for the tours. My husband took the tours and did the info sessions. Good luck! It's an exciting time! Maria

I do what Ethel Mertz does, but I voted 'yearly'. I plan the general subjects for the year starting the spring before and spend the summer working out syllabi. Every Sunday, though, I make a one-page chart for each kid that lists the daily assignments for that week. This is the time when I check in with them to see if they are on track or if they are behind, and what they are going to do about it if they are behind. Which happens a lot. The one-page schedules go on the fridge. I do different colors for each month so it looks pretty! My boys never look at it. They make their own schedules and keep track of their own stuff. But it helps preserve the frail illusion that I have that things are really under control. And that is what I'm going for. Years ago, when they were younger, I did highly detailed schedules in the summer that included, planning out when to buy supplies for science and history projects. Those were the days :glare: . Maria

I saw the second part of the question. It was hard to come up with good questions, because so much information is online, and presumably the student should have reviewed all that. Some questions: How active is the college placement office? do they actively help you find summer internships and jobs in my field, or do they just have a listing of alums for students to coldcall? How successful is my future department in matching students with research opportunities? Stuff like that. Maria

We did several practice interviews with oldest DS. The simplest ones were the hardest. Here is a list I used based on Appendix B in the book What You Don't Know Can Keep You Out of College by Don Dunbar Tell me about yourself. Why are you interested in our school? What are your strengths and weaknesses as a student? Do you like homeschooling? If you could do your high school years over again, would you do anything differently? What has been your most positive experience in high school? Describe your favorite teacher What is your favorite class or subject? Tell me about a paper or class assignment you found particularly stimulating Tell me about a time when you were faced with a setback and you overcame it (This shows up as application essay questions, too. They really want to hear about the overcoming adversity part, not wallowing in the setback part. ) If you could make a difference in the world, what would you do and why? What do you want to study in college and why? How do you spend your free time? Which of your extra-curricular activities is most satisfying? What did you do last summer? How do you contribute to your community? What other colleges are you considering? What are some of the criteria you are considering in selecting a college? We never got through the whole list, but the practice helped him focus on how to present his best self. We also spent time on the "what is your weakest area" to help him think about it not as "I'm so bad at this subject, I really hate it," but to think of it as a challenge that he was in the process of conquering. There are traps here-- it's good to practice to avoid them. Good luck! Maria

You can do it! Just a little each day. And don't be hard on yourself if you drop it for a few days. If you have a keyboard in the house it is always there and you can always go back to it. I started piano when I was 32. I admit I did have 3 months of weekly lessons, then we stopped as it was too expensive and I had a newborn. I bought myself easy piano books written for kids, because even adults like the color cartoon pictures, LOL. Over the next 18 years I learned to play-- I can play the Sonatina by Clemente. Sometimes I would have lessons, with my kids' teacher. But most of the time I do not have lessons, I just set aside time to play. It's fun! It works a different part of the brain! You are making music, making the world a better place. You can do it! Maria

My oldest is very extroverted, and when he had quiet time it took him longer to get work done when he was younger. Scheduling in small segments really helped alot, as a PP suggested, and it made me feel that I got something accomplished. Also, lots of active breaks. I let them stand up, or walk around or move however they want-- more blood flows to the brain, keeps it working. There have been studies that show that having distractions actually helps make the brain work harder at learning material. http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/07/health/views/07mind.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0 Now the oldest has headphones and listens to music as he works. And he gets a ton of stuff done that way. Maria

Hooray, hooray, hooray!!! very cool additional recognition. Congratulations to all! So much good news! Maria

I am so glad to read this thread. All the PPs seem much wiser than I was back when we started. When we first started homeschooling, we joined an art class for homeschoolers, and I casually mentioned to my kids that maybe they would make some friends t here. The oldest said, "We'll go there to make art, but we don't want to make friends." It was at that point I realized that I could not make their friends for them. So I told them that I would put them in situations where they could meet other kids, but it was up to them to make their own friends. I realized I would not have wanted my mom to make my friends for me! But I still worry when they don't make as much of an effort as I would like them to make. We also have focused on joining groups to focus on a specific activity. In the teen years I don't have to participate-- I get to stay home! which I love. They go out into the world. Still, it seems to get harder as my teens want to go deeper into their interests, and then they turn around and find that the other homeschoolers have no idea what they are talking about. Both my teens are finding that their 'friends' are adults they have met and befriended in their areas of interests. The oldest is an extrovert, and even he finds some times to be lonely. DS16, an introvert sometimes worries that he seems too weird to others.. DD12 is happy as a clam with her activities, and seems content to have no close friends. She does get annoyed when coop kids become exclusive and shut her out, so sometimes we talk strategy in dealing with that. Usually the best solution is to ignore it and focus on what she likes. It is reassuring to read that this is only temporary. It helps ease the worrying.

FIRST: JennW, lewelma and hornblower are GENIUSES. I am taking copious notes. My DD12 is also a horse and theater kid. I also am looking ahead to high school to see what to do with those things or whether I should meddle in her passions, thinking I should stay out as Regentrude advised. One thing that worked well for my sons was to find interesting, in-depth summer programs that would give them exposure to new ideas and also give them short-term goals to work toward. I focused on programs that awarded high school or college credit. Cornell has an Equine Science program for rising Juniors and Seniors. DD and I have looked at that program, and talked about building a transcript that would help her get accepted into that program. It is still a long way away, and she could change her mind, but I use it as a way to help her think about the high school years, as a way to empower her to set her own goals that she can work towards. It's so much easier when you get your child to buy into a plan. http://www.sce.cornell.edu/sc/programs/index.php?v=188&s=Overview Maria

Yikes! How frustrating! I don't have experience selling damaged books, but I certainly have bought my share of books with markings and stains. If the book was closed when the coffee spilled, then it is probably just the cover and edges, so it should be OK. If the book was open and some inside pages got stained, I would just make sure they dried and the pages didn't stick together. Also, I would be honest in the description of the book and damage. As far as its value, that depends on the current market for that book. You'd have to see what other sellers are asking for that book. When my kids mess up like that, I try really hard to be like Elsa and...... you know...... let it go. I live with the love of my life who managed to accidentally break almost every fragile wedding present we received, simply because he didn't pay attention. He didn't get why I would get mad. To him they were just things. Things break in life. Stuff happens. Hope the rest of the day is better! Maria

SKL and Regentrude have good ideas about setting time limits for yourself. I was a Cub Scout leader for 7 years--I ran both my sons' dens at the same time, and I was the pack Committee Chair for 3 years, and I did district-level training and I did Woodbadge (major training) Oh, and I ran recruitment for my sons' Boy Scout Troop when they bridged. THEN I jumped into Girl Scouts for 2 years. And then I was out. I LOVED Scouts. The reason I could do Cub Scouts for so long is because I partnered with a good friend. We both planned ahead together, and shared the work. We did awesome, outstanding meetings and field trips-- because we were prepared! AND we had each others' backs, and we could laugh. Is there someone like that you could ask to work with you? One thing to consider is that as time goes on you will become super-efficient at planning and running meetings. Projects that would fell another person will be what you pull out of your back pocket. By the time I got to Girl Scouts, I could whip up a full meeting just thinking about it in the car on the way home. I had so many supplies left over from BSA that I could pull together nearly every craft, only heading to the craft store once in a great while. I knew how the project would run, I knew what would be needed, I could foresee where the snags would be. Experience is an awesome teacher. I don't want to say that as time goes on it will get easier, because that is not going to help you. Parcel out jobs, set time limits, then focus on your daughter. But your skills WILL make it easier for you. Another thought: Is it possible that all the time you are putting into Scouts is preventing you from seeking a back-up social outlet for your DD? From experience, I can say that I think sometimes when a group of folks are disorganized, they know it, but they may not have the skills or time to do anything about it. And when someone new comes in with organizing skills, it can be like a swarm of mosquitoes draining you dry. They can latch on, so happy that someone else is doing all the work. That is my warning bell. When few people step forward to lighten the load, I start to feel used. And that is the first step toward feeling bitter. I don't like feeling bitter. So that is when I make hard choices and either step back or leave. I left BSA because I wanted to spend more time with my daughter. About a year after I left leadership, my sons had quit. "We were in Scouts only because of you," they said. Oh! and this: When my oldest DS was a Webelos,(last level of Cub Scouts) I asked him what was his favorite part of Cub Scouts: "Running around with my friends" Boy, that really humbled me! We left GS because we had to drive an hour each way to meetings, which were in the mornings, once a week. The time commitment basically killed most of a whole day, and we had other obligations to get to. And DD didn't really have a lot in common with the other girls, who all lived around each other. Not having that commitment has opened up whole new areas for all of us. Maria

Most of the field trips we have done were pretty great, but they were always just our family. When it is tied to something we studied, it was golden. And it was also good to just have a break once in a while. We also have enjoyed trips with one or two other families whose kids were as much or more interested in the subject/exhibits as we were. Our larger group hasn't organized any group trips in a long time. Too many instances of families backing out at the last minute, or time conflicts-- the domino effect that a PP mentioned. One 'retired' organizer from time to time will mention that someone should step up to organize some group trips, but..... if no one volunteers, it doesn't get done, and if no one misses it, is there really a need? In reading this thread, I realized we haven't done any field trips at all this year-- with DS18 in DE 4 days a week at the community college, and a coop on Fridays, and college apps to do in the fall, we haven't had the time to get away. Time to get cracking! We've hit all the local museums so many times that the only reason to go would be nostalgia. What my kids really like now are special cultural events like symphony concerts, operas, plays. We have an opera coming up (only because out of town relatives are here) and a symphony concert the next month. I was happy to learn of a lecture series at a science lab nearby, so I'm checking those out for interesting lectures. (way cheaper than symphony or opera tickets.) Sometimes the group trips are OK--if it is a smallish group, and the other kids will be focused and interested in the exhibits. One great visit I did with DD years ago was a trip on a Tall Ship on Lake Michigan. The crew told tales of pirating on the Great Lakes. We signed up with a group, but the two of us didn't really know anyone. This worked out because DD was entranced. But I have been on too many scout field trips, and learned that the material goes in one ear and out the next when it is MUCH more fun to run around with friends. It is always much more productive, relaxing and nicer when it is just our family.

When I first started this process, I discovered the closest public hs wouldn't take any outside testers, because they take their headcount in September-- Their students have to decide in September whether they are going to take the test in May. Then the count is closed. Those students who change their minds later in the year and want to take the test are out of luck at their school. We found another public hs a few towns away that offers 30 tests -- is that all of them? -- and happily takes the other ps students who decided later in the year to take the test, or who forgot to sign up or whose school doesn't offer the tests. The test coordinator is a lovely woman, very easy to work with. She will take testing requests up until the last minute in March. During the tests, the parking lot at that school is packed. They turn a resource building over to the tests, and hundreds of kids are lined up to go in in the mornings and at noon. It's kind of chaotic, but they seem to get everyone sorted. They seem to group the kids by school. I wonder if the schools get a cut of the fees. Maria

I let them make the choice, but I totally skewed the presentation for the oldest kid. If I sold him, the others would follow. My kids are all quirky and odd. They would be mincemeat at the high school. In his 7th grade, oldest DS started making noises about wanting to go to the local high school, and he said it was so he could be with his friend from Boy Scouts. I had already researched the procedure, so I cheerfully explained that we would have to decide in the spring before freshman year, and choose his classes in the spring (at the time we waited until summer to decide these things). I also explained that he would have to get up early, and that his friend who lived on the other side of town would be going to a different high school because he lived in a different district. I also named the boys from his troop who WOULD be going to our high school-- these were all boys whom he didn't like, and they tended to get into trouble more. I pointed out that he would be seeing these kids every day for 6 hours, instead of just a few hours at weekend campouts and a weekly meeting. He listened to all this then said, "Well, then, forget it." He is my extrovert, and I knew that if he went to high school, goodbye academics. DH and I were completely committed to hsing all the way to college. So I was biased in my presentation of high school and focused on the cons--and I don't feel guilty at all--my age and wisdom helped me see this was the best choice for him. I was helped by the Scouts and his own quirky interests. We focused on getting him mentors in his interests whom he could meet regularly, getting him into regional groups in his interests (regional because then the kids are from all over, so the school identity is minimized) He did a lot of online courses, but we also did a couple coops a year with kids his age. (he left Scouts freshman year.) Starting junior year he did some CC courses, which were a huge benefit to him in terms of opportunities for recognition and mentors. Now he is a senior, and in looking back he is completely glad he homeschooled. However, he said there were times when he was lonely. However, I truly believe that he would have been lonelier at the high school-- he is an unusual kid, and even the homeschooled kids his age don't really get him. At a high school, I really think he would have been targeted by bullies. He is very lopsided in his abilities, and the school mentality would not allow him to surge forward in his strengths, instead hold him back by his weaknesses. If he had gone to high school, there is no way he would be attending his first choice college. Second DS never questioned it. Homeschooling is giving him the freedom to focus on his art. He is my introvert, but again we work hard to get him into regional groups with other kids who share his interests, as well as mentors. He has become very assertive in finding opportunities for himself. He would be very, very unhappy at a school. My DD12 is doing high school level work in math and science, and is very small for her age. She is not interested in going to a high school at all, because she said everyone would be so much bigger than she is, but not as far along in their studies. She rides (we lease a pony) and the stables is a wonderful resource. She competes a little-- just the shows that are at the stable school. But she also volunteers at the stables, helping very young children at their lessons, and helping to run pony birthday parties. She is at the stables 3-4 times a week, and has a group of friends there-- most are younger than she is, but she is comfortable with them. (The girls her age are giantesses compared to her, already developed, and interested in boys. She is not there yet.) The stables is like a second home to her. Also, leasing gives us the freedom to NOT go to the stables every day to take care of the horse. She is able to pursue other interests as well. All three kids are different, so their perspectives are different. If my oldest had made a stronger argument for high school, (rather than tipping his hand that he just wanted to hang out with a friend), I would have to seriously consider the ps option. BTW--I have seen families who take high school year by year, never deciding to commit 100 percent to homeschooling all four years. I see this as very stressful-- they can't make plans for the future because they don't know if they will be homeschooling. They aren't available to make plans with other homeschoolers to do long-term projects, for the same reason. They want to be able to take advantage of last minute opportunities-- I see it as the antithesis of the bird in the hand worth 2 in the bush mentality. They keep holding out for something better, and then they 'settle' for homeschooling. For the kids in these families, that is a lot of instability. These are kids who just can't decide what they want to do. In their coop classes the kids never really give 100 percent--it's as if they are mirroring their parents' inability to commit. So I see a lot of wisdom in the advice to make a 4-year plan and stick with it. But this requires the parents (the mom, really) to do a lot of planning and research. In my circle, the ability to be organized and prepared is not universal. Maria

Hi-- You probably know these are pretty bawdy tales.The Miller's Tale, and the Pardoner's and Summoner's tales, for instance. It was a bawdy age. And it was why Chaucer was important-- he brought the vernacular, and lower classes, into literature. I would start with the Prologue-- comparing the Middle English with Modern is pretty interesting, and you can do it online. http://www.canterburytales.org/canterbury_tales.html You can preview the tales pretty quickly here: http://www.litcharts.com/lit/the-canterbury-tales/general-prologue The Knight's Tale was a source for Shakespeare's "Two Noble Kinsmen," and that tale seems to be a criticism of chivalry. It is followed by a tale about the lower classes from the Miller. (in which the besotted Absalom mistakenly kisses his love's 'bum." And is flatulated upon by his rival.) The Reeve, slighted by the Miller's tale, tells a story about a dishonest Miller. The Pardoner and the Summoner's tales show them to models of the corruption of the church at the time. The Wife of Bath tells a story about her 5 marriages, then a tale about a rapacious knight, to make her point that what women really want is control over their husbands. The Clerk tells an opposing story about marriage, in which a king tests his wife's loyalty to him by taking away her children to test if she will question his decisions. The Cliff Notes site also allows you to skim through the stories to see which ones you want to read. http://www.cliffsnotes.com/literature/c/the-canterbury-tales/summary-and-analysis/the-prologue Fun stuff!

Yes, exactly, I agree. Lack of math knowledge is unfortunately a problem for students in both ps and hs. Too bad the woman quoted about that didn't have a rigorous home education in the STEM subjects. And too bad that she and the CC mom were the only hs grads quoted. BTW I'm in a state that has no reporting requirements. At all. We don't have to write a letter or register or anything. Our state is too messed up to worry about us. :sad: Maria

It would have been nice to read about hs graduates who did NOT need remedial math after they graduated. Sigh The local cc has sections and sections and sections of remedial math--- and I'm pretty sure those classes are not there for the handful of homeschoolers in our area. On the other hand, those families we know whose kids DID get into Harvard, Stanford, Georgetown, UChicago, etc, wouldn't think twice about saying "No" to an interview request from any newspaper or media. I've seen requests for interviews from time to time cross our local list, and the most serious, academically rigorous families ignore them. So the reporter may not have been able to get any other sources than what she found. Still, I bet the families highlighted had no idea how they would be portrayed. I am sure that first mom had nothing but pride in showing her homeschool to the reporter and photog. I am sure she hadn't thought that she would be presented negatively. Maria

You get to decide how many hours = 1 full year (2 semesters). Some homeschoolers use 120 hours = 1 year. some say 150 = 1 year (75 hours per semester) some say 180 hours = 1 year of study, (90 hours per semester). Some use a different method altogether. In OK, if 120 hours is 1 full year, then 60 hours = 1 semester. I used 150 hours. There have been threads discussing the pros and cons of each method and system. Still trying to figure out how to link to other threads.... Maria

I taught a Caribbean history class, using Brown University Choices curriculum. I put together two of their courses: one was for a history of the Haitian Revolution, then I followed that with a US Imperialism course that talked about the US policies in the Caribbean while the Panama Canal was being built. I counted it as a semester. It was part of a year-long project on coral reef regeneration. A few families got together to teach their kids, learn marine biology, do labs at the aquarium downtown, learn to scuba dive, then we went to the Dominican Republic to do scientific surveys of coral reefs for an international conservation group. A friend was really into Project Based Learning, so she proposed this, and the families involved devoted a year to it. We also did biology that year, but kept marine bio separate. My friend went back the following year with her kids and a different group of families, to continue the project. My oldest DS used this instead of World History. He took a Holocaust History course at the CC as well as some philosophy classes which were organized historically. http://www.choices.edu/ here is the Coral Reef Regeneration project website we created: http://cr2chicago.weebly.com/ It was fun to approach the topic from an angle. Because my kids had done the SOTW cycle twice by that time, it was interesting to them to go deeper on different eras and regions. Maria

Hi-- I wish there had been another option on the survey, such as, "it's useful but not absolutely critical." I did not teach my oldest two kids to write the 5 paragraph essay. My oldest DS had a wonderful AP lang and lit teacher in our coop who hated the 5 paragraph essay. DS is definitely a humanities kid. But when he was 16 he applied to some prestigious summer programs and was rejected and or waitlisted. His writing was passionate but all over the board. He had so many ideas he couldn't focus his thoughts and bring them to conclusion-- this was a big problem in his applications, which were all essay-related. So he took a summer lit class that focused on formulaic essay writing. He hated it, but the cool TA from Swarthmore convinced him to work at it. And once he figured out the formula, he could write circles around others. That fall the first essay he wrote for his CC class was nominated by the professor for the school's academic journal of best student writing (no, he didn't use the 5P form, and his paragraphs were looooonnnng.) The next summer he was accepted into two summer programs-- one was the Stanford Humanities Institute and the other was Telluride Association Summer Program. And, as he did not have the best test scores, his acceptance into his first choice school wholly depended on his application essays, which rocked. What he really needed at that time was someone other than his mom or a friend of his mom's telling him how to organize his writing, Writing is a reflection of how you think, and it is almost like someone telling you how to think. He needed someone cool telling him how to improve himself. I agree with PPs who compared the 5P formula to a recipe. It's just another tool. If you really hate it, don't teach it, stick with the essay writing that works better for you and your kids. Even STEM kids will have to do some writing in college. We have a friend whose son is in Engineering at Case Western, and the physics tests require the students to not only give the correct numerical answer, but also to explain why they got that answer and which principles were involved. They don't need to write a 5PE, but they need to express themselves clearly. As long as students learn to write in an organized way that expresses what they are trying to say, they should fine. Good luck! Maria

DS was accepted into Wesleyan University in CT. It's his absolute first and only choice, and he applied Early Decision. He has wanted to go since he was 12. We still can't believe it. These boards have been very, very helpful for me, particularly in the last year, when all the older kids in our hs group had aged out. Suddenly I found myself as one of the few "veterans" when I certainly had no idea what I was doing. I am truly humbled by the experience on these boards, as well as the grace and courage that is helping families through the ups and downs of life. Faithmanor, sending so many hugs your way. Congratulations to everyone! Maria

If you are looking for the other members to help organize events, whether they are field trips or support meetings, you need to get their buy-in. You might start by holding a Planning Day, with a note asking everyone to bring ideas on how to reorganize/improve/freshen up/ spread the load. You need to allow enough time for you to lay out the issues, and for people to talk about their ideas and brainstorm new ideas. It's best if this is an adults-only meeting, but if that doesn't work for everyone's scheduling, make sure it is in a location where the kids can play without parents hovering too much, so the parents can pay attention to the discussion. No matter what, my advice is to keep the tone positive, and show enormous gratitude for people's time and effort. Show humility. Solicit feedback over and over-- even if you know it will be bad. Feedback is a gift. If someone volunteers to run an event, make it clear that they own it, and no one is going to second-guess them. Then, don't second-guess how they run the event. And, one more thing, make a huge effort to be transparent in decisions. Big smiles, gratitude and transparency absolves a lot of mistakes. Good luck!

The comments section is pretty funny. Maria