Good morning! run to the store for cheesecake and get cashback clean the house 13000 steps violin run a few loads of laundry take oldest ds out to dinner Not a whole lot going on today. Classes start Monday and the rest of this week is filled with running around, so today is an off day.

Yeah...we found out more. He has been insinuating and straight out saying ds was trans for a while now, as he's grown his hair. Not in a "hey, that's cool" kind of way, but a misogynistic crude sort of way that not only negated who he was, but also any competent girl on the ice. And ds looks like the poster Victorian child with long cherubic ringlets and big eyes. DS is not trans. He just got tired of the homophobic/anti-trans rhetoric directed at him and snapped. I'm okay with focusing on the aspect of "team practice was disrupted and that was disrespectful to your coaches." and not giving empathy to the kid that he pummeled. I'd be glad to explain that to the other kid's parents, too. It explains why ds didn't ever want to wear his team jacket. That kid's parents paid for them all. But we're working on trust issues again and how to deal with big feelings and bad situations. Parent teacher conferences went well. Very speedy: "not living up to his potential, has a tendency to rush through his work, but is very bright, animated during discussions, and keeps himself out of the drama." (I nearly snorted at the last part) The rest? I definitely knew.

Good afternoon! I'm still processing the fact that my 14yo attempted to beat the tar out of his teammate during practice last night. The kid ran his mouth often, ds had enough of being the target. So.........*sigh* We're working out a plan today. It is an unusual situation, in which no one who was there is feeling sorry for the kid that ds laid on the ice. Up next: parent teacher conferences. Laundry is in the wash. Dinner is BLTs and leftovers.

I will get more info from dh later today. He buys them at the local bike/ski shop. I don't know what they taste like, lol, but I know ds will eat them when he is struggling. They look like regular ones, maybe smaller? About 3-4in diameter.

My purse is set up for sports: Lots of Kleenex (because of ds's nosebleeds) Powdered electrolyte packets Children's scissors Nail clippers a crochet hook wallet small coin purse with bandaids, neosporin, iodine packets small bottle of Motrin fruit sticks & protein stroopwaffle about 8 pencils, a black pen, a blue pen, and two dry erase markers

Oh, I think you misunderstood! I absolutely do not mean debate them! I mean things like, "This sounds important to you." And letting the conversation get carried a little more. "Where did you hear about this?" And letting them talk some more. You start to see motives and who is pushing them to solicit donations, and it gives you more of a chance to talk to your young neighbors, not at them. Going door to door is hard. Kindness isn't. You can absolutely respectfully decline anything you want, but it is worth it to see why they're out there in the first place.

I'm going with borderline inappropriate. A safe neighborhood, with an ambitious 10yo leading the direction is different than two kids being sent off meekly to wherever. This might be the older kid's idea. We get the occasional kid coming by. Usually a scout or kids looking for school donations. Most of the time I take a few minutes to talk it out with them and see what they know. Today we had our own weird solicitation. Dh and I were a little on edge by the black SUV that slowed its roll down our street and checked out our property clearly. That was followed by a white car 10 minutes later who hung a little bag on our front door. Inside was a pair of socks and a card from the local realtor, promising if we went with them we'd get rates that would "knock our socks off." Ha. Ha.Ha. Never mind we have no intention to sell. DS14 is thrilled he has a new pair of bbq grill covered socks, though.

We had this one: Catch And Release Trap. It works well. The bait is definitely important. Dark chocolate is a favorite, but add a dollop of peanut butter and they come running. I use it in my garage.

Grocery and box store done. I made the mistake of taking dh with me, lol. My $30 trip ballooned significantly. BUT, we did get an 18 pack of Kraft mac & cheese for $14. Oldest ds has that as one of his comfort foods and I can see a few boxes getting made this week with the uneven weather.

I hope not? 😂 It's usually about 26 weeks, but ds's team is currently undefeated and 1st place in the conference. There are four rounds of play off games scheduled, so it'll be another two weeks or so if they make it through the rounds. This year his new team wants to do a 'get to know you' ice session in the spring and a few summer skills, but they were vague on that front. We tend to sign him up for a one week session during the summer so we don't have any fall surprises (like gear not fitting, muscle lag...) but many of the kids his age go from the season, to a spring 3v3 league, to every day summer skills and weight training, then the pre-season camp and back to the season again. That is......exhausting. And we'd really like ds to not have to give up the rest of him in order to keep up. We like that he does scouts and volunteers and does gaming and all sorts of things. Hockey will end. He will grow out of it, or the division will narrow enough to push him out. We'd like him to still know who he is when that happens.

Good morning! Today is definitely going to be busy.. hit up the warehouse store. I have parent-teacher conferences tomorrow and figure they can all use more kleenex and pencils. It's allergy season. stop by the grocery store for oatmeal and dinner ...er, figure out dinner wash the sheets burn more yard waste violin 13,000 steps take ds to his science lesson this evening stop and get second dinner/pack it in the car before we go take ds to hockey practice (moved due to tryouts this week)

Any time a community is cut off from outside eyes, abuse has room to foster and grow. I think that's the dynamic we often see in boarding schools, yes, but also elite sports, religion, show biz, homeschooling....it's hard to find that independent oversight if those in charge make the rules and the rest of the outside community has no ability to act.

I took ds to the birthday party. One of the parents offered to take him home, so I consider that a win. It gave me a chance to burn some yard waste without a "helpful" teen who just wants to build the biggest fire he can. I also got my school room clean. Yay! I'm sorry about your ds, @ScoutTN. We've seen some of those friendships run through our house. It's never easy. I remind myself that most of us don't maintain our childhood friendships through adulthood and it's good to find those who are right for us at that time, but.........well, here is an anomaly. These folks' ancestors got off the ship in 1620 and became so intertwined with one another that it's common to see people who went to school together, grew up together, had kids around the same time, and put all their kids in the same activities. Generation after generation repeating a cycle. It's not something I'm used to and have no idea how to help ds think about long term when a friendship peters out because nobody ever leaves here.

Your day sounds more exciting than mine, @TravelingChris. Is it a local or professional version of Jesus Christ Superstar? I've had the opportunity to see some really well done local productions. And some interesting ones. 😆 My son's heavily Christian high school put on a very edited version of Grease. By the end I wasn't sure what I was watching anymore. Today: shower set things up for tomorrow swing by the store take ds to a bday party dinner: leftovers. DS will be fed at the party, which is awfully brave of the mom. A dozen teen boys with bottomless pits in lieu of stomachs..yikes. Disney trivia night at home

It's the tar and nicotine sticking to the clothes. If you want to salvage, put them in a soak with a lot of vinegar or Oxiclean to loosen it all up before washing, not the vinegar in the wash. I might add a bit of Dawn to it as well. Oldest ds struggled with some detergents. We'd have to soak, then wash, then wash with baking soda. I stopped going to thrift store for their clothes because it was just so much to do before he could wear them.

MEP, Miquon, and Gattegno. There's also CSMP if you have a color printer.

I'm sorry, @ScoutTN We've had those sort of dinners here and it's frustrating to put in the work, time, and overall energy to be stuck with leftovers for one.

Good morning! We woke up early to take ds to his last game of the regular season. They remain undefeated and will take the first place slot in the playoff bracket. Up next: do a quick marinade on the meat for dinner figure out if we're going to a birthday party tomorrow or not, and what to bring get ds to do his laundry work on a puzzle 10,000 steps type up notes

We had rules when ds first started staying home 1. No stove. Microwave is fine. 2. Phone has to be charged and ready to go. 3. Don't open the doors, even if it's your friends. We have an active neighborhood and ds has 4 he can go to in a moment's notice, so I know there's always back up if necessary.

I think you really have to decide what is in your power. Behavioral expectations in your home are in your power. You can set them, enforce them, and nip things in the bud by being extra watchful. Listening, and offering advice if wanted, is in your power. They each may need an ear and someone to restate the facts non-emotionally. Getting them over the hurt or developing their relationship is not in your power. You can't do much there because so much has to happen internally. I don't have a great relationship with one sibling. My mom would brush things aside or minimize real hurts in favor of trying to get us to be peaceful and happy. We haven't talked in 30 years now because that particular relationship was not worth it to me to keep being a part of.

This is all new, but it looks like they have parity(?) games in May, some "optional" summer training, and then hitting it for real by September. He was thriving out there last night. The pace is quicker and the kids are all the same age, so you don't have huge weight/height differences or the need to hit someone to get them off the puck. The kids pass a LOT, too, making the goal for the puck to be up the ice and not for a player to carry the puck up the ice. I was mildly impressed with how well his skills fit in.

Not much going on today. Dh and I ran errands and such yesterday so we could stay home during the rain. I went with dh and ds to the last night of tryouts so we could have a sit down with the coach and get some extra questions answered/get a feel for his temperament. It'll be a good placement for ds, I think. And ds broke my heart when we were talking yesterday. "I'm glad a coach *wants* me". Oh, buddy. We can tell him, but he doesn't believe us that his current coach thinks he just about won the lottery getting ds. Last year's team went 0-17-2(wins, losses, ties), this year they're at 15-0-3. Three kids were added to the roster for this year and ds is the top scorer overall. Today: contract signed violin coffee laundry dinner: shepherd's pie since I didn't make it yesterday Forced Family Fun time

I don't care if you think the tone was incorrect. It is not plausible, safe, or in the protocol for students to stop to get their cell phones in the event of an emergency. It's not opinion, it's fact, and the idea that it should be up to the individual teacher to make that decision puts kids more at risk in every emergency. You and @TexasProud can try to make my objection be about whatever you want, but it won't hold water.

The team he's on plays for fun. The kids are 13-15yo and some will also join their high school team while others will either continue rec only or just peter out. I was a little startled this year when the parents from the other team brought juice boxes and snack packs for their kids, like in soccer. So it's that kind of relaxed play with volunteer coaches. This one has 4 levels and paid coaching staff. The lowest level is two above what ds is playing now. That's where he'd be placed. The highest level of kids are prepping for juniors or college while splitting the season with high school. Stats are kept on every kid, giving them an individual picture of how they're doing. DH did some sleuthing and poking around. He vaguely recognized one of the coaches. Turns out one of the new directors is the first professional player ds worked with so I'd be willing to bet the coach was one of his assistants. They have touched in with his progress over the years, so it's nice to see a familiar face again. DS is currently thinking things over, but he is thrilled that he was chosen. 🙂

In addition to the above - how to write an email. Not just the basics of grammar and punctuation, but introducing themselves, getting to the point quickly, and writing an appropriate closure. Also, how/when to use cc and bcc. So many teens struggle with this act.