Maybe I'm not understanding, but I think the idea would be that, for one year, you *would* fully enroll him. Then, by testing, it would be clear that he's ready for calculus, AP biology, etc. Even if he has to sit through English 9 (and maybe he wouldn't), overall it could be better than the alternatives. Then, the next year you pull him back out, give homeschool credit for everything he took, and continue with senior year.

So what you're saying is that the data and the announcements have nuance, but the public understanding isn't able to grasp those nuances. Am I understanding that correctly? I'm afraid we are reaping what we have sown. Abysmal science education has consequences.

So, just noting that I really don't think this is accurate. Did we ever get comprehensive figures on how many have side effects significant enough to keep them home from work? Mine certainly weren't.

One other thought-- it may be time to put on your own oxygen mask. Focus on meticulous self-care: getting outside daily, good diet, good sleep, therapy (virtual is easy), medication. You sound like you, yourself, may benefit from support, so you can provide the best support for your ds. A therapist might also have ideas for helping him. You may already be doing all this, sorry if it's restating what you already know. Seriously, if there isn't anything for his age group, see if you can create something.

I can hear that. I'm sorry.

@RoadrunnerOr, a different approach-- a strong focus on helping someone else. There must be someone in need that your ds could help. That can go a long way in giving a sense of perspective and improving outlook.

This is the same where we are. Is there family anywhere that your ds could stay with for an extended time? Or, is there anything else that your ds would love, but under normal circumstances you would never do because of expense, trouble, etc? We have dealt with mental health issues, and have gone way out of our comfort zone in response. It was expensive and difficult, but did help get through a rough period. If possible, I would become the hostess with the mostest for whatever group of kids your ds would do well hanging around. I would go the whole nine yards-- screened enclosure, fans, masks available, food, games, fire pit outside, barbeque-- whatever gets the kids there.

Yeah, I understand that concern. It's screwing up a bunch of my plans, too. You may be talking about more serious harm than I'm encountering. The situation stinks, no question. This shifts the conversation a bit, but this experience has made me look at where we live in a whole new way. Thinking ahead in a broad sense, I want to be in an area which has responded intelligently to this crisis (because there will be other crises down the road), and an area that provides what we need to thrive. I had thought about relocating post-retirement, but the areas I daydreamed about haven't handled this crisis well. This reality is changing my thoughts. Maybe you could think about doing something radically different? Are you the person who is tied to your area because of employment? I understand that, we are too, for now. But maybe there's something that could change. Could you start a group for your ds, with safe guidelines?

This. This is a very hard time, but it isn't permanent. Things will shift back. Humans are wired to gather in groups. (I mean, some are wired that way more than others... One of mine is hoping online school is still an option for 2022-2023... ) But just look at how hard staying apart is in general. People don't like it. Most of us aren't wired that way. We're social, and we will *act* social, just as soon as possible. Some things may shift, like allowing more people to work from home, but people will gather, because that's part of what humans are.

Reducing the spread eight-fold is significant, though. That will help prevent hospitals from being overwhelmed, and protect a whole lot of people. if certain regions just insist on acquiring their immunity the old-fashioned way, through infection, on their heads be it, but they'll still end up with some degree of immunity. It'll take a while, but we will get through the pandemic stage.

I'm so sorry; I know how hard that is. Sending lots of hugs.

I'm so sorry. Fwiw, I think the empty house is the best plan, provided it has power, water, and some furniture. I hope he continues to be protected from most symptoms by the vaccine, and recovers quickly.

Thinking of him and you. I hope he's quickly admitted and they can help him.

No advice, just ugh. That's so terribly sad. As to whether it could really be that bad... I know nothing about the progression of colon cancer, but people do sometimes astound me with their awfulness. I'm so sorry she's in that situation, both the cancer and the parental control, if that's what it turns out to be.

That is a lot of mail, wow. Is it possible that the mail carrier could come to his door, perhaps once a week? Maybe there are accommodations for disabilities? Like this: https://faq.usps.com/s/article/If-I-have-Hardship-or-Medical-Problems-how-do-I-request-Door-Delivery#:~:text="Hardship" or "Medical Problems,a statement from a Doctor. Editing to add that you might need to get him a separate address, like "221B Baker Street."

So glad you can bring him to a less overwhelmed hospital. I'll be thinking of all of you and hoping he improves soon.

Reading this thread, I get the feeling that the differences in lifestyle may be greater now than when I was a teen, and those more extreme variations might make things harder. The differences I noticed were people living in a more expensive neighborhood (but not everyone did), belonging to the country club (again, not everyone), and making their debut in senior year (maybe 1/4 of the class). Only one or two (out of 80+) typically spent summers out of the country, and of those, one was an international student going home. Many (most?) had summer jobs. Things sound like they might be different now.

I'm so sorry. That would be such a shock. I guess it's too early to have any idea what caused it?

If the kid in question enjoys it and can have it, hot and sour soup is great for this. Chicken soup, essentially, plus clearing the sinuses! I hope she feels much better soon.

I'm so glad! Continuing to hope for the best for your home, as well as your family.

Ditto.

I attended a school like that, and my dd briefly did also. Our experiences were utterly different. The key points were the size and quality of the school, and the attitude towards all the "extras." Mine was fantastic. It was a warm, nurturing place with great teachers, challenging classes, and extracurricular activities that went far beyond standard offerings. I never felt out of place; though it was an old-money sort of environment, there were also people there on scholarships, and also other people whose parents had put them there as a refuge from the city's public schools, which were pretty bad at the time. The teachers and administration made it clear that I belonged there from the first moment I walked in. Expensive optional extras were not pushed, so while I would have loved to go on one of the overseas trips, no one made me feel bad because I couldn't. Most students didn't do those things. That was important. I hoped dd would have the same experience at her school, but no such luck. Academically, it was mediocre, while also constantly patting itself on the back and denigrating the local public schools. It was too small to offer the variety of classes and extracurricular activities that my school or our local public schools did offer. It required super-expensive uniforms, but then also had very frequent "spirit day" activities when random other clothes were...not required, but highly encouraged... so we were forever having to go buy a shirt in some particular color. The teachers hounded dd to go on a very expensive overseas trip, and at this school, apparently pretty much everyone *did* do things like that.There was generally no recognition that they were pressuring people to spend a ton of extra money. It did offer a safe environment and fairly good teachers, but it wasn't good enough for us to justify continuing the expense.

Okay, this is particularly interesting, thanks!

Interesting, thank you!

This is going to be hard. The outside time isn't a problem except in extreme weather, but both girls have a lot of screen time which isn't entirely discretionary: online school for both last year, and for one this coming year. I can let them know that this would be beneficial, though. One at least would be happy to hear that more outside time was recommended. Older dd's myopia is already worse than mine, which is far worse than dh's, so I understand the suggestion to slow the progression. I'm just sceptical about how effective it will be. I appreciate your thoughts.