~Julie

We have 5 dc, and we had a tiny (1000sqft) house. Calling it a cottage would make it sound much more charming than it really was. I'll just tell you a few of the things I did to try and make it more pleasant for company--you can see if any of the things would work for you. In our situation, we had no other room to put someone--we always put our kids on our bedroom floor and gave the guest their room, there just was no other way. I always put a basket in the room with bath towels and other things specifically for guest use, put a few magazines that I thought might appeal to the interests of the guest, and made sure there were tissues, night light, sometimes fresh flowers, and a few unopened water bottles in the room for their use. Oh, I also added some kind of chocolate or mints. Usually the women loved this, but the men seemed to also. No matter how warm the weather, I always left a stack of neatly folded extra blankets and pillows in the room. Sometimes I was surprised at the times that folks actually did use them, even in summertime. I also always left a basket of snacks and fruit in plain sight on a kitchen counter, and made sure that I pointed them out right away. If I knew that there were times we'd be out of the house while a guest was there, I would explain up-front when those times would be, so the guest would know that during that time, at least, they'd have a little more breathing room. Oh, we also have a whiteboard on the wall in each of the kid bedrooms, so that I can leave them messages about chores, etc--we always erased the board and wrote a welcome message on the board in bright, noticeable colors. Something along the lines of "Welcome, Uncle Dan! We're sooo glad to see you. Please make yourself at home!" Along the same lines, if the guest was someone dear to our dc, we encouraged them to make a handmade card to leave on the pillow for when our guests arrived. If you don't have a night light in the bathroom, and in the hall on the way to the bathroom, now's the time to do that. It's really uncomfortable, imo, to have to try and find a bathroom in the dark in someone else's house. I always tried to make sure that there was a small section of closet space in case the guests wanted to hang up one or two things, and I would mention that to them as I showed them the room. If it's not a bedroom they're in, I'd put a hook on the back of the door and point that out in the same way. I also let my dc know that under no circumstances were they to go into a guest's "space" uninvited, no matter how small the space may be, lol! All-in-all, I'm sure you will find plenty of ways to make a guest comfortable. Just thinking about it beforehand is half the battle.:001_smile:

I'm SO sorry! What a blow... Hugs, Julie

I did take the microwave to a different room (where I know the power is working), so I know it's not the breaker. I will try the link you gave--thanks so much!

My microwave suddenly stopped working. No lights, nothing. I've checked that it's not the outlet by plugging it into an outlet in a different place, but it's definitely the microwave. Is there any sort of fuse or reset button that I could check? I Googled, but didn't immediately find the answer on that. Thanks!

I don't think the logic on this one quite carries through...If we took the homeschool convention and held it out in the middle of a busy street and carried signs designed to offend/incite those who don't agree with our lifestyle rather than in convention halls, churches, and other less-disruptive places, then it might be closer to the same. I would not object to a gay convention designed to support and encourage homosexuality held in a convention center. It's clear that the goal of a Gay Parade is not for homosexuals to get together and discuss how to better practice their "gayness" and meet other folks who are gay, but rather to be "in the face" of those who aren't gay. Different thing, I think.

In a city nearby where I live, there is a medical practice that deals only with "Indian Health". It's not on a reservation or anything, but they make it quite clear that they are there exclusively to serve "Indians". I'm assuming that they mean Native Americans, and not folks from India, but that's another story.... But what I've always wondered is if "Indian" human beings had vastly different bodies than caucasian bodies, or black bodies, etc. :confused: And, how much trouble would I get in if I started a medical practice and flat-out named it "White Health". I understand the idea that in the past certain medical practices did only treat white folks, but that's not happening any more around here. I'm pretty sure I'd be absolutely castigated for making it clear I'd only treat white people. My understanding of equality ('ya know, where people are judged by the content of their character and not the color of their skin) would preclude the idea of basing any type of business specifically on just one race/color of skin. What's evidenced to me by "Gay Pride" parades, and other such occasions, is that folks DO want to be judged by the extraneous details of their lives that make them fit whatever minority description they identify with. I don't welcome "Gay Day" at Sea World, or the "Gay Pride" parade, because I think it's foolish for people who theoretically would like to see a more inclusive society to make it clear that what they want is not equality, but something beyond equality. Nor do I want to see an "S & M Picnic Day" at my local park, or anyone else with an alternative lifestyle or minority status delighting in offending those who aren't quite ready to treat them like everybody else. Even though I'm relatively accepting of homosexuality (although I do believe engaging in it is a choice, just as is abstinence) if I'm really supposed to treat everybody equally, *please* quit telling me what you do in your bedroom, just as I agree not to describe to you what goes on in mine! It's a detail I just don't need to know since what I'm going for is to treat everyone I meet with respect and civility. So, in a nutshell, I think the Gay Parade is..well...silly, and certainly isn't achieving what (I think) it's intended to. It encourages people to judge others by the very things that make them different, rather than helping create an inclusive society. As for the Girls on the Run program, I'm not sure yet where I think things like that fit into the picture. :001_smile: Respectfully,

We've had a Playstation 2, an xbox 360, and a Wii (at different times). For kids your kids' ages, I'd *absolutely* go for the Wii. I can't really vouch for the longevity of the console though.

We eat one fast food meal per week--usually Sunday lunch so I don't have to cook. Each time it is $22 (we always get the same thing, lol!). Adds up to $88 per month for the 7 of us, but I'm rounding it up because we eat pizza or something else maybe once every month or two. $100 per month.

I've searched and searched, and finally I decided to put in the larger cities that are close to where I live, and where my sister lives. That would be Sacramento, CA and San Diego, CA. Are there really no locations within 50 miles of either of those cities, or is their search function not working right? {Thinking wistfully} I sure do wish there were somewhere in my area...Even though Sacramento is about an hour away, I was thinking that maybe a group of my friends could go in together as far as transporting food. Divided by say...ten families, the benefits might outweigh the cost of the fuel to get there.

I remember shopping with my 5 little ones--not fun! I've got to say though, that it would never ever have occurred to me that Costco folks would help me load my groceries to/into my car. Part of the *point* of a warehouse store is that you're helping yourself in order to keep prices down. With that said though, if I had been in the parking lot and seen you struggling I would certainly have run over (or sent my big boys over) to give you a hand! Also, even though I think Costco's policy is that they don't load unless it's a big item (like a shed, or something) I'm sure that if you'd said you just couldn't do it yourself, they would definitely have sent someone to help you at the door. ETA: I've always actually been impressed with the service at the Costco stores I've been in. They're unfailingly efficient, usually cheerful, and absolutely have done everything I've wanted them to do (with warehouse standards in mind).

If it were me, I'd use the money for the emergency fund. The groceries, you've been able to cover up to this point, but it's pretty difficult to get another lump sum to put into the emergency fund. Something else always comes up to use the extra, kwim? I don't think either choice would be "wrong", but sometimes it's worth losing a bit of money (in this case the prospective $60) in order to see yourself on your way to a bigger goal (in this case, the emergency fund that you *will*eventually*need*, hopefully later rather than sooner!)

You used the quizzes/tests from the website, or from the book? (just making sure I'm understanding you right!)

I just came across the website with all of the interactive activities for Spielvogel's Western Civ, and I haven't heard anyone mention if they use it. I'm so impressed and excited, but I feel like it's too good to be true that there's interactive maps, essay questions, quizes, crossword puzzles, online flashcards, etc, for free and ready to use! The parts that I explored, I really liked. Anyone have any input on this? http://www.wadsworth.com/cgi-wadsworth/course_products_wp.pl?fid=M20b&product_isbn_issn=0534646026&discipline_number=21

If you do decide to ditch the k12, would you be in any position to get your dd to the community college for a few classes? I know it's a pain to get her to the closest community college from where you are, but she could go just 1 or 2 days a week in a dual-enrollment situation and rack up a lot of credits. One semester of a good foreign language class in college is generally counted as a full year of high school foreign language credit-wise. The community college closest to you (I think I know where you are, anyway...not to be creepy or anything:D) has a pretty good reputation. I also agree with the others though...your dd is very young. My 14 yo is actually a high school freshman this year. Are you sure you're computing her grade level and credits-needed situation accurately?

A mix of both of those ideas would be really nice. A few home-cooked meals, and then a nice dinner out. Not to get too sidetracked, but every single time I hear about soldiers returning home I dissolve into tears of gratitude. I'm sure it wouldn't mean much to your sister and brother-in-law, since I'm a stranger very far removed, but please try to pass along my thanks for their sacrifices. Blessings, Julie Edited to add: I just realized you were specifically asking for advice from military families--which we're not. Oops...sorry.

We were told (after about 2 1/2 years of "trying") that dh had a low sperm count. I still think the lab must have dropped the ball on this one though, because about 6 months later I was pregnant (with no medical intervention). After ds #1 was born, I didn't use any contraceptives because I just assumed it was a fluke the first time. Lo and behold, 18 months later ds #2 was born. After that, we decided we were having tons of fun, and the more the merrier! 16 months later, ds #3 was born. After that, there was spacing of about 2 years between #3, #4, and #5. All in all, we had 5 babies in 7 years and 1 month, all with a sperm count that my OB/GYN said would *never* result in a pregnancy. WHEW!! So yes, it can certainly happen. :D

I have an opinion about this that may not be popular, but while I love the literature approach of Sonlight, sometimes I think it's great to take a break from that and go to a very fact-based, traditional textbook approach in order to learn basics and hopefully more "at-your-fingertips" fact recall. I think there's a place for both types of learning. Some of my favorite textbooks for basic, straightforward history, are the PASS textbooks from the Florida Dept. of Education. They are intended to be used for remedial high school students, and they split American History into two years and World History into two years. I've found that we have no trouble increasing the pace to include both volumes of either World or American History in one year. In two years, you have a very complete overview of both World and U.S. The reading level is simple, but the content is fairly complete, imo. Fairly painless to get through, and it's just open-and-go/no frills. You can download (and print) the student texts for free online, or you can buy printed versions with Teacher's Guide for around $30 from the Florida Dept. of Education (you have to mail-order though). I'm not saying that it's the "richest" plan of action, but if your ds has little recall of actual facts of history, you may want to bite the bullet and just focus on the practical necessity of getting through the material he needs to know. I'm just tossing out another idea on where to go from here, and I'm so sorry that you had that "moment". -Truly not fun... Blessings, Julie

I was reading Beth's thread about Hillsdale trips, and it planted the seeds in my mind about taking a trip with my ds at the end of his senior year next spring. I think I remember hearing about a particular travel agent/company that worked with homeschoolers for educational trips. Anyone know which one that was? Actually, I'm open to all ideas for educational trips. If I do this with my ds, it's likely to be the only time that either of us leaves the country in our lifetime. Any ideas? Any experiences you'd like to share? Thanks, Julie

I got so emotional reading about the trips offered this summer...I think my ds should take a senior trip. I didn't see anything about pricing (I might have just missed it). Would you mind telling a price range for this? Thanks, Julie

Now I know that for my oldest son at least, 16 seemed to be the magical age where he became very clean, good-smelling, and cared what a certain young lady at church thought about him. I'm comfortable with 16 as a reasonable age for that "awakening", and there's another factor to consider... That innocence doesn't necessarily go away when the interest appears. My ds and this sweet girl are on the same page, in terms of not becoming openly or overly involved at this young age. They are clearly "sweet" on each other, but think they're hiding it well (or at least trying), though they clearly think the other hung the moon! What I'm saying is that the innocence can continue even after the interest shows up. I'm pretty sure that if things continue as they have been (both kids are 17 now) that they will wait several more years before they openly express any intention of romantic involvement. My ds 15 1/2, on the other hand, is still not there. He's a bit "younger" in personality than his older brother. I predict that he'll be about 16 1/2 when he hits that milestone!

I would never have anticipated how much I enjoy getting positive rep points. I think it's a little sick probably, just how good I feel when y'all send me positive rep and sweet comments. In a world where I often feel a little misunderstood (and a little stupid), around here I feel accepted. My rep points, few as they may be in comparison to many other folks here, I cherish (more than I ought to!). Someday I just know I'm gonna have *two* green squares....sigh.... BTW, I probably remember to check about once per week, but if there's something really nice written there and I feel a little needy, I visit my rep comments more often, just for reassurance. ;)

I absolutely agree with every point here. I think your letter has great points, but would simply call the pastor and ask if you could meet over coffee to discuss some ideas. Right from the start, the long letter will beg to be ignored. You can be *way* more effective with an open discussion of ideas, and then you will also have the opportunity to clarify anything that may have been misread had you just sent it in a letter. Great ideas, though!

Hi again, Erica! I might have muddied the waters by mentioning the example about my friend and my son's friend, but I think what I mentioned about my dh, his brothers, and his cousin, are "spot on" as they say. It sounds like *exactly* the same situation, and I just want to encourage you to see the positives about allowing a slightly more exclusive friendship between the boy cousins closest in age, while your other dc enjoy the family aspect the rest of the time. Coming at the issue from the other side, sort of btdt, the benefits outweigh the minor discomfort to your other dc about a lesson they'll have to learn anyway in another context if not this one. I just think it would be a loss for you to mention this to your sil, because it would (in a way) be discouraging a really special friendship, basically in order to see that your other dc don't feel left out. What a caring mom you are! Some of my hardest parenting times have been over issues such as these--I do see where you're coming from, I'm just encouraging you to think it over. :-) Blessings, Julie

I'm not so sure about this...I think it's true that as time goes by, there are good things about having same-sex and same-age friendships. I completely understand the great things about inclusiveness. But... I have three boys very close in age, and they will always be each other's "best friend". My dh is one of 7 brothers, and they are truly best friends. At the same time, my dh is the best friend of one of his cousins, and was his best man when he got married, etc. I'm sure glad that they were allowed some times without the other brothers. It's only been a good thing for both of them. I guess what I'm saying is that it's entirely possible to continue the close relationship between all of the kids while still allowing some time with the boys closest in age. In a way, it does come down to the same situation as this: I have a friend whose ds is one of my ds's close friends. We spend plenty of time as families enjoying each other's company, but no one is surprised when the two boys closest in age want to spend extra time together. I would never presume that my other dc should be invited to the events that are clearly special time to foster that friendship. On the contrary, I want my dc to experience both types of friendships--those inclusive relationships with all sorts of people, and also those more closed relationships that allow you to share more private kinship, kwim? I'm not sure I've made sense here, but in a nutshell, I do think it's the same as if a non-family friend had invited your ds to a birthday party--your other dc would not be invited, and that's fine. It's sort of a fact of life that we all have to learn.