Has your dh tried talking with her dh alone without sis around? Maybe he can get some answer from him in private....stuff she won't tell anyone about. I'm sorry too... how sad for your whole family.

perhaps she is dealing with depression. In looking at some of what you've said - she's in her 50s (probably menopausal) with no children. Even though that is by choice, it may very well hurt on occasion, especially when someone enters that time when it will never happen. The difference between "I don't have children" and "I can't have children". KWIM? Would she be hostile if you just popped over with a simple "get better soon" meal. Don't ask, just pop over- even have a cooler or something if they're not home and you can leave it on the stoop. Maybe as a way of saying that you care without being too pushy.

Well, it sounds like she may be dealing with some anxiety issues. She is getting herself overwhelmed. I would work on talking her through these things before they happen. I have one who when she was small couldn't deal with sudden shifts either (not exactly the same thing concerning expectations though). I couldn't just announce... "time to clean up!" or "time to go home" She absolutely would melt... I'd have to say, "In 15 min. we're going to start cleaning up." I also couldn't just give her a bunch of things to do at once. Ex: "Go clean up your toys, bring me your laundry, go fetch the mail, and then clean the toilets." something like that. She would go into completely panic mode and couldn't even start, and then start crying. I learned that I had to say, "Go clean up your toys and then come back to me for the next thing..." And so it would go. She could only take those things in little chunks. Your daughter is 10 I would ask her how you can help her not have such high expectations and see what kind of cues she gives you. Also, if you want some natural ideas. My dd (from above) who deals with anxiety says that rescue remedy really helps her. She's away at college now. also, I have found that Natural Calm is helpful as well ,although I'm having a hard time with her being consistent with that one while she's away.

I wanted to update. We've booked a room at Massanutten. I was able to find a specials package that included hotel plus 2 passes to the waterpark for $120. It wasn't nearly as expensive as I thought since w'ere going mid-week and only one night. Loads cheaper than GWL... plus they have night snow tubing that we're hoping to do the night we arrive.

No, but perhaps if you explain these things when she first expresses an interest. Or perhaps ask her what she thinks it will be like first and then explain where she may have higher expectations. Maybe you already do this, but you didn't say so I thought I'd bring it up. It sounds like she does have certain expectations and fanciful ideas of what things will be like so maybe if you cut her off at the pass and explain it *first* before she builds it up in her head the let-down won't be so bad.

Me too... I think I'm actually a little too good at it and wish I was one of those people with boundless energy.

All my plans to finish up my ruana this weekend have come to naught. I was fighting something off most of the long snowy weekend and just didn't feel up to doing anything but lie on the couch or watch tv. I hate it when that happens. I hope others here have had better success.

my pre-teen does not have one. Other kids do. However, my sister's daughter (15) does not have one. She has instagram or Twitter (can't remember), but not FB.

We're into camping and hiking. None of my boys stuck with scouts, though. It just didn't stick.

thanks everyone for your imput. I'm going to wait until dh comes home and we'll talk about it some more.

my youngest son is off school all next week and we're thinking of doing 2 days 1 night at GWL or some other similar resort. We live within 3 hrs of the Williamsburg, VA and 4-5hrs from the Pocono's GWL. I looked also at Massenutten (much more $$$) and the indoor water park is closed the exact days we're thinking of going. It would be snow tubing and boarding instead for the guys (I hate skiiing) I can't switch days because of watching my grandson. Anyway, is it worth it for a 12yr old who will be coming without siblings or friends?

I agree. sometimes we need to acknowledge the bad happened. When my mom died a lot of sad memories came flooding back. I didn't ask for them and really wished they'd just stayed in the past and not dredged up. I think I understand how you're feeling. Just remember you learned a lot of how not to parents from your parents and use that to be a good mother. :grouphug:

how frustrating! hope you get it sorted out soon.

I'd not heard of that. How long have you been using it? And where do you get it. I'll check my b-complex to be sure it's the better kind.

I tried using 5-htp last spring but I found that it kept me awake at night - as if I'd had a shot of caffeine. Since then I've gone off the pill and have had very emotionally destructive PMS symptoms. I've read that 5-htp is one ingredient in some natural PMS remedies, so I thought I'd add it to my daily regimen which already includes Vit. B complex w/ C and magnesium (also ingred. in PMS remedies). However, I'm going to try taking it during the day rather than at night. I know I could sure use an energy boost anyway and I'm hoping it will help. Does anyone else have the same problem with 5-htp?

I'm so sorry. praying for you all.

I voted best MIL I could have hoped for. She's been a great MIL.

I'm still working on my ruana. We're in the path of the snow/ice storm (coming tonight/tomorrow), so I plan to finish it up then. TechWife - I couldn't get your pictures to come up... I'll try again later. I love seeing everyone's work.

very cool. I only watched MTM occasionally and also didn't really appreciate it until I was older. What a beautiful house! I remember listening to a segment on NPR about 20 yrs ago about a guy who had made models of all the insides of tv houses (Brady Bunch, Dick Van Dyke, etc. etc.) This thread reminded me of it.

taking magnesium daily. Helps with my RLS and with sleep (usually - but not always).

Hoping the quiet means she's getting the care she needs. Continuing to pray

I voted occasionally full make up but it really depends. I wear it off and on - but mostly for special occasions like church or night's out with friends, etc. I also prefer the tinted moisturizer or BB cream because the foundation is very light, but enough to give you a fresher look. Sometimes I'll do the full thing (tinted moisturizer, blush, eye stuff) and other times just eye liner and tinted foundation. I never wear lipstick. I've gone periods in the past where I wore little or no makeup but after I turned 40 I started using it more often. I think there is a noticeable difference at my age - especially with light foundation and something to define the eyes (it doesn't have to be much though).

praying for you Jean.

Sure it's a bird? It could be a squirrel. They make annoying noises that is similar to a squawking bird.

How did he get cleared? Indeed. The same could be asked about Sandusky too. History has shown us that these types of people get away with it far more often than they should. Hindsight is 20/20 as they say.