In the thread about introverts hosting, statements like "I always go to other people's places. I don't want anyone in our home" got me wondering: is it no longer considered good manners to reciprocate invitations? Does being an introvert give a pass from what I thought was basic courtesy? Over the years, I have hosted countless dinners, drinks parties, big garden parties, and most of the people who happily come to my house as guests have NEVER reciprocated. I do not mind hosting, and I am not expecting tis-for-tat, but once in a while it would sure be nice to be on the receiving end of an invitation. Is that no longer a thing?

I hate driving on busy interstates and much prefer a country road alternative if it's possible.

Aside from the valid point of not wanting to infect others: a sick person usually doesn't feel well. So why would they want to drag themselves to a party? That alone would be enough reason for me to stay home.

It varies. If the scholarship offer comes directly from the department, it may be a different time than the scholarship offered by the college. Our department used to base first-year scholarships on ACT score and now, since the school is test optional, does a holistic review of the application. For returning students, it is based on the GPA and won't be announced until the final grades for the spring semester are in and the scholarship review finished.

Dips: guacamole and hummus are gf, df, ns.

Fyi, German traditional Christmas dinner is roast goose.

I have gift bags and tissue paper because I save those. I have copies of the books I authored and could easily wrap up a last-minute personal gift, and I have always several nice blank journals around. I also had notecards made with nature photographs and can pull out an assortment of those. For generic gift exchanges within groups, I could run to the store that's three minutes away and find something.

Use the search term Ex libris. Brings up lots of options for me.

I love to sleep 8.5 hours a night and would like to sleep in until 6:30am. Normally I am up at 5 because of the cats. If I can, I love to take a 2 hour nap in the afternoon.

I find that caffeine does help with the tiredness and mild depression (there is research that caffeine is effective as a mild antidepressant). You can drink black tea, or if you dislike that, too, caffeine is available in tablet form.

PP made a good point addressing the afternoon slump. Can you switch the main meal to lunch, and serve a simple dinner of bread and cheese?

Mood swings, frustration, sadness, feeling overwhelmed, depressed and exhausted - that all sounds exactly like what perimenopause did to me. Especially when it is related to your cycle. I have none of your additional issues. For me, none of the herbal supplements and stuff worked, and progesterone made the depression scary. I got better when I focused on spending a LOT of time outdoors, engaged in heavy exertion, much more physical activity than I thought I needed. Plus getting ALL the sunlight, changing my work space, etc. May not be an option for you, but it was the only life change that helped. Do discuss this with your doc and explore hormones. Best of luck. Being a woman sucks.

My DH wouldn't either, but I bought him a sweater vest for $3 at Goodwill that he'll wear for the party every year. This year he won in the "reuse" category of the sweater contest, lol (elaborate 6 category voting and real prizes). I wouldn't wear mine for normal occasions, but when everyone is playing the game, it's tacky to behave as if it "beneath me".

The first year my friend threw her party, a very dear older colleague showed up in an grey wool sweater that was darned at the elbow. She completely misunderstood the assignment, but it was very sweet.

Yes, because my best friend throws an epic ugly sweater party each year, and I don'twantto be the party pooper. I used the same one five years in a row and bought a new one for this year's. $5 at Goodwill, not an investment. It's not purposely ugly, some folks would consider it normal seasonal wear, but that's so not my style.

We didn't do anything special. DD was away at college, getting ready to graduate.

One can just line dry all laundry, even for a family. A dryer isn't a necessity. There are folding racks that hold an entire load.

You should be able to bake in a Dutch oven on the grill. If your grill has a lid, it also wouldn't be much different from an oven, would it? You wouldn't have convection, but wood burning ovens don't have it either.

Someone can be MY best friend even if I'm not THEIR best friend.

My mom needs nothing. She usually gets a photo calendar. Sometimes I have good ideas for her. Over the past few years, I gave her a bird feeder, a therapy lamp, and an electric blanket.

I have cooked roasted parsnips before and found them to have a very distinct flavor. Not sure it would blend with mashed potatoes. I like almost all veggies, but the parsnip flavor was off-putting to me. Otoh, cooked celeriac root makes an amazing puree and we love it.

nevermind. just saw you don't one single color

I am sorry. We left behind pieces when we moved here because I knew most houses here have ceilings too low for my antique German wardrobe. It's sad to not be able to use a treasured piece of furniture.

I find it difficult to imagine a deep, identity-creating passion for trivia night and bowling meetups. But is there *nothing* that fills you with joy and that you love to do for yourself (and not as a vehicle for meeting people)? No, we are not all wired the same way. But most people do have something they love to DO with their time, often deeply entwined with WHO they are. I have friends who are passionate about gardening, writing, community theater, music, hiking, climbing, cooking, restoring old furniture, homesteading, identifying fungi.... so many things that enrich their lives. And the connections with other people who are interested in those things are easy to make and to develop into strong friendships.

Deeper connections tend to develop from shared interests and time spent together *doing* something you love. All my boyfriends were very good friends first. Same for my kids' partners. Then a relationship can grow organically when you know each other well. It is also more sustainable because you have the common interest and the thing you love doing together, and you always have this as a way to reinforce the connection. I am sorry you never had fulfillment from hobbies and friendships. That sounds very sad. Perhaps you haven't found the right hobby?