Also, with my son, he was in heart failure because it was so large. They waited 6 months to get him to gain as much weight as he could before operating. At 6 months, he stopped making any gains and started to lose what he had so it was the point of no return. He’s done really great.

To top things off—-I broke my foot on Friday. My right foot. I am home bound for however long this takes to heal. Thankfully I have a church that has offered to help in multiple ways—meals and a crew of women with grown children to just be me for a couple of hours. I had to figure out how to care for my disabled son. Thankfully, he has strength in his legs and we own some helpful equipment. And I was so looking forward to things being a bit easier on me around here!!!!

My son had a VSD (fairly large) repaired at 6 months old. It is a "routine" surgery done quite a bit. He is fine now and doesn't have any residual effects from it. He doesn't even require antibiotics during oral procedures because it closed very well with no little holes. He's 19 - no heart issues at all.

I put my remaining two kids in school this year. So far, day 2, it’s a huge win. I realized something. I took my homeschooling job very seriously. I never took days off for anything unless they were pre-planned or if we had fever over 100degrees or throw up. Yesterday and today, I have been battling a bad cold along with getting around three hours of sleep a night. In my homeschooling days, I would have barreled ahead with a full schedule because I’m not “that sick”. But I am. My body is screaming for rest. I would never have given myself that luxury before. Now, being able to step back, I am realizing how badly I treated “me”. This is a good realization.

My friend tried recently getting an iud removed and now is looking at outpatient surgery because the thing is embedded in her uterus.

The dad’s also have to realize that these babies have essentially gone through a trauma of sorts. They have been separated from the birth mom which may not seem like a big deal to people now, but they are still missing the voice of the woman they heard for their pre-birth days. They need bonding time more so than a typical birth situation.

I had this happen to my Ds. I have no idea how he got enrolled in school since he was at an age I didn’t even have to report him for homeschool purposes. How can a school enroll a child with absolutely no paperwork or forms from the parent?!?!? How did they even know about him? How did they even know that we hadn’t moved?!? I only knew about it because I got a call from a teacher introducing herself and saying how excited she was to meet my son. I then called the school office and told them about their mistake. They didn’t seem too concerned until I mentioned that by their enrolling him, they also bought school materials for him. That was a bigger deal as we lived in a small town and most likely wouldn’t have a new kid coming in any time soon to use those materials and workbooks.

I found jcpenney online to have men’s jeans and dress pants for cheap on sale. They are the Arizona brand pants. I got my Ds a 26 waist with 34 inseam kakis for about $15 each. I would never be able to find that in a store!

She went to school last year also. She’s a good student and obeys in class. She usually winds up loving every teacher she’s had to the point where I wonder if it’s healthy on her side. Last year she came home frustrated or crying almost every day but I could actually work through it with her because I hadn’t been with her all day. Some of it may have been a very weird social policy that the school set up—we’ve switched schools this year so that should help some (not all) of the issues she had last year. I stopped homeschooling her because if she didn’t understand a new concept immediately, she would shut down and start yelling at me. I was shaking from stress and knew I couldn’t physically do it any more. I don’t always feel like I need therapy. I feel pretty upbeat usually if I sleep. I’ve been battling insomnia for a while and trying to get a handle on it naturally before I go to the doctor for prescription drugs. I’ve given myself one more month of trying. I guess sometimes I need permission to distance myself from dd and not feel guilty about it. It’s not how I want to parent, but she’s offering me no choice right now. We think a sport would be a good thing, but we’ve maxed out on outside stuff. Her older brother who is borderline autistic has karate and it’s been very very good for him and is helping him break out of his social awkwardness. Ds needs a break from her also so we don’t want to put them in the same group. For the sake of our sanity, we can’t run two kids all over the place. After school stuff works better because it’s just picking her up instead of driving somewhere, waiting, and driving home.

I'm back asking further questions about this issue. Life has gotten very difficult around here. She has decided that she wants to rule her own life and will make anyone who stands in her way miserable (she's still 11). I feel like we have regressed to the point when we adopted her and she was having obvious reactive attachment problems. I'm done in so many ways and my dh says to not give up hope that things will get better. My dh went as far as to tell me not to say much to her today because she is yelling at me in anger much of the time to much of what I do say to her. I'm not quite sure what to do. Honestly, the thought of therapy for her and our family distresses me because they will want me to "try" and help her. I don't feel much like trying. I've been trying for nine years and I'm wiped out. I feel very sucked dry by this child and if anyone suggests I try more, I'll bite their head off. Right now, our plan is to get her doing something away from us as much as we can find ways to do it. She's starting school in 10 days and I can have a bit of a break for at least the 7 hours she's in school. It's gotten to the point that if we need to pay for after school care just so she can have more to do away from us until we can recover a bit, we will do so. It's probably not a good solution but everyone in the family is steering clear of her right now.

Does anyone have something that keeps you cool? I have figured out through a lot of trial and error, that when my mattress gets hot, it activates my restless leg situation which keeps me awake and starts a bad bad cycle of insomnia. If I could keep my mattress cool, I think I could actually sleep better. Right now, I am sleeping on a blow up air mattress on the floor because the thing does not retain body heat. I can keep the room around me cool, but if the mattress gets hot, my sleep is done. And no, I'm not having hot flashes. I'm just a hot sleeper. Is there anything that could help this situation?

I have found this marinated mexican meat at Costco that is really great for a taco feast. It's grilled, but makes a ton for the package it's in. This also is my go-to meal for guests because it can be customizable with allergies.

We have three dobermans across the street in a tiny yard. They bark at everything when they're out. A neighbor a block away jogging, the small child walking home from school, and every person who goes to get their mail at the 45 slot neighborhood mailbox right next to their property. They bark when the owners are sitting on their patio, they bark when the owners tell them to stop. They bark when the nice neighborhood girl who knows the dogs goes to pet them because they are scaring the four year old girl who went to get the mail with her mom. They not only bark, but put their paws on the four foot fence to growl and bark in your face because the sidewalk is right there also. Thankfully, the owners tend to not let them be outside for extended periods of time and are usually good about bringing them in at night, but yesterday, the owners were gone all day and let them be outside to bark at everything. They have bark collars on because I also hear a small whine every time they bark at me but they obviously don't work. Honestly, large muscle dogs that won't listen to their owner scare me-- they do get out occasionally and I will tell dd to come inside because I don't trust these dogs at all. One came rushing at me when I was mowing the lawn. The owner was calling for it to come back, but it was ignoring the owner. I tilted the lawn mower in the direction of the dog fully intending to use it if he got too close. Thankfully for both of us, the dog got distracted and ran somewhere else.

My name is Beth and I am a former homeschool mom. I put my dd in public school last year due to me just being able to be mom to her and not also teacher. I am putting my ds who will be in 8th grade this year. I've ben overwhelmed with caring for my disabled oldest ds and trying to homeschool. I thought I would be able to homeschool one child, but I really can't. And to add to the mix, a new charter school opened near us that has the type of education we always wanted to give our children along with small grade size (50 kids per grade up to 12th grade). I have felt like I should have been stronger - I should have been able to do this. This has been my job for 13 years and I should have been able to complete it. But, I have no desire and no drive to do it anymore. I'm tired and know I wouldn't have been able to put in the amount of effort required to complete his schooling well. I am also finding a TON of other homeschool moms just like me joining this school.

I'm 48 and I have some pure white hairs by my temples. I'm a redhead and my hair is slightly wavy but the white hairs are kinky and course. I thought since my hair seems like it's on a slow road to going white, I'll just let it because I am close to 50 and my youngest is 11. I don't mind the white, but if all my hair does that, I may mind very much.

I actually "courted" my now dh. I had come to a point in college where I didn't want to date anyone if I didn't know it was going to lead to marriage. BUT, dh was turning into my best friend at the time and I already knew him and had spent a lot of time with him and we wrote each other a ton of letters by the time I was 23. We have been telling my ds who is 17, that courting was one way that worked for us because we knew each other so well, but it may not work for him. We have told him to date with a purpose and he has owned it. He has dated a few girls here and there briefly and hangs out with a girl pretty regularly (as "friends"--so she says). As he gets older, we realize that he may have to date a girl/woman in order to actually get to know her and we're OK with that. We don't live in perfect situations where a large group of young men and women hang out together all the time and he would pick a young woman from that group. So, we do think courtship is a wonderful way to start a marriage, but we know in the real world, it may not happen like that and we're perfectly fine with it.

I’ve responded to mom’s on Facebook posts who have rashly pulled their kids out of school for various good reasons, but have no plan in place, no way to pay for any plan and some are even working full time. I tell them maybe they need to work with their public school better or put them in a different one (not too hard around here) because it doesn’t really sound like they want to homeschool. They just want their kid out of that particular situation. Then a bunch of other moms of young kids get in there and say how if you “just read” to them, it will be great. Or some other such non-school thing. Then I try to explain that plan may work great for young kids, but 4th,5th,6th graders really need more than just good read alouds and an actual parent who can teach them. The response usually is all encouraging...”you can totally do this!” “You’ll never regret homeschooling!!” Stuff like that. Annoying.

When do I apply for this? Ds is a senior this year. Also, he will have enough credits to enter as a junior. But I’m guessing I just let him enter as a freshman?

I’m getting strong! I’m finally one of the cool kids! I never really made the pretty list (I’m not “unfortunate” but no one is going to offer me model contracts ever) and I’m too flat chested for sexy. I joined a CrossFit gym to be able to take care of my disabled son more long term and try better to avoid a genetic disposition to osteoporosis. I’m a lot stronger although looking at me you wouldn’t know it. I actually lifted my son vertically about a foot and was so thrilled because I’ve had to do that in the past and wasn’t able to. I’m finally in the cool persons crowd!

I was just playing around on the estimator since we're still waiting to apply for next year. Did you know that if DH and I are divorced and everything else is the same, ds would get $200 more in aid? That doesn't make sense. Also, should we be hiding our savings? Is that legal? We have the advised "Dave Ramsey" 4-6 months in savings that will be looked upon negatively. And no, we don't want to throw it at the mortgage or something else like that to make our savings lower.

I lived in MN for 17 years. Totally correct in your estimation. Cost of living is good in many small towns. but I never knew how much I was weighed down by the political vibe until I moved. BTW, beaches in Minnesota are very different than your west coast beach. You can find Minnesota surfers who surf on Lake Erie, but BRRRRR!!!!

This is helpful. I did email his youth director and ask him about his behavior at youth group. According to the youth director, he still is quite quiet at times and mumbles answers to questions, BUT, once he warms up, his voice volume is loud enough and he talks a lot more. They're seeing him open up more as he gets more comfortable. My guess is that with ABA therapy ( it's mostly a social group as far as I can tell), he'll behave very reserved at first and then get more comfortable as time goes on which they will consider a success of their methods. I think this is his normal MO. We are sending him to a smaller public charter school next year mostly because we just feel he needs to get more comfortable around people. There will be grades K-12 eventually with his grade leading the way into the upper grades. His class will always be the oldest grade in the school and his class size will be around 50 kids so small for a public school around here at least. He was starting to cocoon at home more and more. Also, it's for my benefit. I was worn out and burned to a crisp homeschooling.

Colorado Springs has great resources for homeschooling. There are a ton of excellent and free charter school homeschool programs that meet one to two days a week and really help with the academics. Also, free college while in high school opportunities. Like a pp mentioned though, the cost of housing has been increasing at a pretty fast rate. It’s one of the top real estate growth areas in the country. People are pricing their homes assuming Denver buyers in my area. So they price really high because Denver has gotten so expensive. Weather is great usually. No beaches. The closest we get to a lake is fresh water reservoirs.

He doesn't have negative behaviors. He doesn't have trouble regulating emotions- he's actually the opposite - he doesn't like to show too much emotion at all. When he gets upset/ is ready to cry, he's most likely to turn his head, tilt his head up, and blink away the tears. He has no trouble with transitions. Other than his social hesitancy and what some would consider shyness, he's pretty typical.

My son was diagnosed with mild autism about 6 months ago. It mainly shows up in his social interactions. Since that time, he has gotten involved in a twice weekly karate class and has found a youth group he enjoys and attends weekly also. He is pretty quite on his responses to the point you can't hear him/ understand him and tends to not start conversation. I remember being that kid at his age. People constantly had to tell me to speak up and I was pretty shy. At home, he is different - he will initiate conversation and speak at an appropriate level most of the time. He does respond with an "I don't know" because either he really doesn't or doesn't care to talk. His pediatrician made clear that while he was writing a referral, he did not believe ABA therapy would help at his age. I'm on the fence. It's basically an enhanced social group with cues from therapists to aid him in learning how to socialize. His karate class is making sure he is learning leadership skills (in small part), learning how to give a firm handshake and look people in the eye, and teaching him how to avoid negative confrontations with bullies. He has raised his hand to answer questions when the group as a whole was asked (and he speaks clearly enough to be heard). His youth group is a great group of kids where he is really starting to goof around with people and have fun. He is not running from social events and going as far as to write them on the calendar so that we will be sure to remember to drive him. His autism diagnosis was done before he started becoming involved in all these activities. All that to say, is ABA at his age a waste of time or would he actually benefit? What is your experience with an older child?