it's pretty patronising to post the first googled link without any comments.

No, they are really not. For a start, you guys don't face $21, 000+ fines for individuals. Even nsw's latest proposal to extend emergency powers has an end date in 2023, ours have no sunset clause. Most of the 'better than/same as nsw' stuff doesn't factor in that our state gov has a majority in all the 'oversight' committees (eg SARC, which has 4/7 labor plus one independent who votes with labor) and that labor mps aren't allowed to cross the floor. And the 'transparency' means squat - eg the gov is currently fighting to not release FOI documents. That doesn't even touch on their current corruption investigation. I'm not at all trying to imply the other side would be better, the state libs are a sh!t show - I'm p!ssed off that either side has access to these powers.

we know you're not making it up, because we've seen the exact script play out too. It is a relief to know you're not the crazy one! You also don't have to be sucked in to the drama via your sister. Just keep it brief and boring and don't feel obligated to answer every text, just one "okay, feel better" is plenty. Your mom and sister know where you stand, you've said your piece, you're done for now.

what do you want to do? order pizza and watch movies (or, the family watches movies while you stare, catatonically, at the wall...)?

You don't have to make that decision right now. I know she is making it seem urgent but you don't have to jump on her timetable. Now you know that she will drag and blame your kids to get her way. That's good information to have, it will help you make clearer decisions. Take time to cool down. Talk it over with your husband.

ha! maybe a fit about alienating her grandchildren from her, with a legal threat about grandparents rights? or, she'll just rock up at your doorstep. btdt

You and your sister were clear with her. Any misunderstanding is a deliberate misunderstanding. She knows, she just doesn't like it. The mistake is that she feels she needs another chance to get the manipulation right this time. This is truly textbook behaviour, because a narc's worldview is seen through the lens of their own strongest emotion. It's true because she feels it/wants it to be, and no, no one else's feelings are part of the equation.

of course, she's annoyed at your audacity in thinking you may set a boundary with her. It doesn't matter how reasonable a boundary "Don't lie about my kids!" is, props don't get to be directors.

it's a classic move, the tearful non apology. Designed to ramp up the guilt and gaslight you into thinking that you were/are the unreasonable one. Do you really, honestly think that she understands why you are upset and is sorry about it?

oh wow, well done @saraha Don't beat yourself up for how you handled this stuff - in 'dealing with narc' circles it's called the FOG - Fear, Obligation and Guilt. You were never going to handle this perfectly, because you were set up to fail from the beginning (probably your whole life) - your options were either 1. do exactly as mom wants all the time or 2. end up the fall guy who has personally attacked her. There is no middle ground with a narc, you either do their bidding or you are a threat. Let your dh screen your calls, you are actually under no obligation to submit yourself to being gaslit by her. Space to finally be able to know your own mind is incredible (as I found out when my narc mum cut me off in a tantrum.)

A-fricken-men Vic is a Kafkaesque place right now.

yeah, of course there's crazies mixed in. But it's so disingenuous to think that all hundreds of thousands of the protesters are fringe, violent crazy people - especially when the protests were so peaceful! I can of course empathise with wanting a safe working environment, but do you also want updates on how long between your co-worker's boosters? Do you ask about their other vaccine statuses or risk factors? Or do you just hope they act like good rational people? I get that covid is scarier, but at 90something% double vaxxed I think the fear and blame and othering for unvaxxed people is in danger of getting out of proportion. eta re bunnings. It's the principle of it, he tried to do what he was supposed to do but it's all a shit show. He could legally be working at bunnings yesterday but not shopping 😑

we are already at just about 90% fully vaxxed for 12+! what measures do you think are reasonable to force the last 6ish%? How far would you be willing to go? How many human rights charter breaches are okay to round up those last few %?

it is absolutely true in victoria, unless you can work from home or have a medical exemption. I know more than a few who have lost their jobs, and more than a few leaving the state. come on re the gallows. You know very well that people use hyperbolic symbolic imagery at protests, it's hardly an 'only on the right' thing. eg, check out any extinction rebellion protest. The outrage reporting is so disingenuous. fyi - Dh is single vaxxed (waiting on his next appointment - rural areas didn't have many appointments in time!) and was turned away at bunnings yesterday - even with his trade card. So, great.

I wouldn't bother, and I'd block him. Life's too short.

pinning what on you? You quoted me. Jeez, I was just contributing to the conversation not personally attacking you! Sorry.

I didn't say anything about punishment. We wouldn't say it's important to call rapists 'non-consent-attracted people' just so we can gently coax them into maybe admitting they have a problem. The Josh situation has happened because of a million layer cake of denial and minimisation. We need strategies, the first one has to be facing the ugly truth. It's not an orientation, it's a paraphilia. Treating it like the former is not helpful - it is a lie that these renowned manipulators want people to believe.

pedophilia is not a sexual orientation. To pretend it is, is to belie the truth that a sexual attraction to children is a form of sadism - the attraction is to the use of power for destruction of innocence. Pedophiles don't love children, they hate them and are attracted to committing violence against them. Victims have seen that hate and evil up close. I'll repeat this at every opportunity until my dying day. The first step in helping them can't be to collude in lies about their motivations.

ewww Ausmum! poor possum! Here's my chickens checking out an echidna lol

you could do Adelaide market, kangaroo island then up through the barossa valley, keep going up north to coober pedy - all in beautiful South Australia. Then, if you wanted to, it's just 7hrs north to Uluru. I agree, skip fed square it's not worth it. If you want Melbourne City, the art's centre or NGV or the botanic gardens. Catch the city circle tram and go around the city for free.

sometimes I feel like I had the worst gaps for homeschooling, my boys are all 3ish years apart and kind of close enough to sometimes combine for a few months before one has a maturity leap and I have to rethink everything again. I reckon either 4+ or <2ish years apart is easiest, if homeschooling subjects is your primary consideration lol. but, we didn't exactly have a choice in when our kids came along so we'll just joyfully work with what we've got. 🙂

that is an epic pic chooky! we live in the bush and still rarely see snakes, no carprt pythons, mostly browns, red/yellow belly blacks or tigers. Seen about 3 over 5 years. Honestly, I'm fairly afraid of them, especially the browns which can be aggressive, but not enough to dampen how much I love it here. And all our quail are okay 😄

congrats Melissa's Dd! Well done!

thanks @Kareni, great article that jives with my general impression of the book.

well the mandates aren't law and once the state of emergency ends the chief health officer won't have authority to write mandates. eg, the Open Premises Direction is only in force from 23 Oct - 18 Nov (when the monthly SOE renewal needs to be done) What happens with all this after Dec (when the SOE properly runs out) depends on what is contained in the reported 'pandemic plan' bill which will need to be passed by parliament. No one knows much about it yet.