{wistfully} Does anybody know what non-homeschooling sahm's do during the day?

[Dooley]

But I am afraid I would be no good to anybody. I would lay around and read. Cant you get your own Cheerios? And hey, aren't Cheerios good for dinner too?? I would daydream about my yard, and spend a lot of money we dont have on plants and what not. Long walks with the dogs. I believe in independence so I am afraid everyone might need to be on their own.

 

Yeah, I need a job for everyones benefit. BUT, one day...I too will be a SAHM.

[Amy loves Bud]

Most of my closest friends are sahm's with all children in school. I've noticed that as the youngest child enters K, the mom's focus tends to go outside of the home - career pursuits, helping with DH's businesses, volunteering, etc. Aside from the spotlessly clean laugh, the description you give is more a reality in my home than theirs, simply because they are away from home for most of the day.

 

The one thiing I envy is the freedom to drop everything and go. But beside that, they seem to be living a more hectic, busy schedule than I am.

[SonshineLearner]

I always imagine that I could go back to work and it would be money to pay down the credit cards and build that supply that I see people talking about. If I could just make $12,000 a year (after taxes) in a certain number of decades, we too, could be debt free. (including OUR house:-) But, we stay in debt, I stay at home...and my kids stay in bed.....(instead of waking up early)

I look at the kids as I pass the elementary school and just kinda think, "One Year?" Hmmm. Then I'd have my own boss to grumble about...

Carrie:-)

[battlemaiden]

In my neighborhood-

 

Their houses are generally more *organized*. My dear friend down the street is constantly going through her children's toys and clothes (often bringing things for me to pick through- which of course sit in a closet until I have *time* to do it!).

 

They shop. They create activities to fill their time- scrapbooking etc. They volunteer at their children's schools. They generally move through the housemaking routine more slowly than me.

 

And sometimes they call me up to watch their kids for an errand or appointment. :glare: There are a very few people I allow to bring their kids to our house. IYKWIM? But still they try.

 

Honestly, I wonder the same thing.

 

Jo

[katemary63]

I know exactly what I would be doing if I weren't homeschooling. My house sits on the edge of my horse pasture. I get to watch out the window as I sit at a table with my DD and my horses gallop across the field! If she were in school, I'd be riding!

But seriously, I was a STHM with kids in school for 1 year - the year I was pregnant with my 3rd. I went swimming at our gym everyday, kept the house clean, cooked nice meals and took lots of naps. It was awesome! Then I had some time when 3rd was in elementary, before 4th was born. Same thing only not so many naps and a lot of volunteering at schools. 3rd child came home to school after 5th grade and I've been homeschooling ever since. Amazing, she is about to graduate HS and I will only have the one, but now we run a 160 acre farm and I am never out of farm chores, so....I still won't have much free time. But I think I will ride more......

[Grubbsfamily]

And boy it is busy too. I think I see this form different eyes b/c I have been a HS mom. Yes I miss my kids, but this is the path God has our family on right now.

 

I get up @ 5 or 5:30 am to get my kids up by 6 or 6:30 (depending on the day of the week) to get them fed, dressed and ito school. We used to get up at 7:30 now we have to leave the house about that time, (on a non zero period class morning, those days it is earlier) to be at school on time. :auto:

 

Most days I come home from dropping them off and clean up from the morning of breakfast and lunch preparation then walk the dog. When I come back I do any other little at home chores.

 

Somedays I go to the grocery store - all by myself and boy is that faster, although I think sometimes it takes me longer becasue I look around more and don't feel I need to be in such a hurry b/c I may have to buy everything in the store if I don't get my middle child out of the store soon (they didn't always go with me in past years, but many times they would).

 

One day I go to a really great bible study.

 

The other days of the week I spend doing things like washing and ironoing uniforms for school, clean bathrooms or vacuum and mopping since my regular cleaning crew is now at school, or other chores that my husband normally does since they have to be done and it is me or the dog right now!

 

I do run most of my errands while my kids are at school b/c they are so tired and have homework (another yuck of traditional school) when they get home so I don't like to take them. :driving:

 

Each day at 2:00 I stop myself from whatever I am doing and start dinner before I pick up my kids b/c they are ravenous when we arrive home @ 3:30.

 

After school it is dinner, then the homework scene with kids who are tired and really just want to sit on the couch and read a history lesson or some othere HS type activity with mom. Then and evening snack and showers and off to bed so we can do it again the next day.

 

One of the things I like least about SAHM vs HSM, other than my kids being gone from me all day, is that all of the kids extra activities are when the rest of the world is out...uughh! (We used to go to piano lessons at 10 am on a Thursday, now we go @ 3:40 pm when there is traffic on the road.:w00t:

 

I try to be involved driving on field trips and such as my kids all want me to be there, that is what they are used to, and I want to be there too!

 

I will have to say that my house is a bit tidier, becoming more organized (projects getting done) and much quieter - and once in a while that is just a bad thing! (I often have on the music for noise)

 

I do not sit and read books, take naps, have my nails done each week, go shopping for me, the kids or to decorate the house, or spend time out with my friends having lunch or coffee, but maybe that is b/c of my situation. However, I do a lot of things to try to make my house as peaceful as it can be when 3 tired children arrive home after a day of hurry-up-and-waiting, who are tired of dealing with other kids who need to be at home being loved on by their mom - like HS kids are all day - yes even the yelling of "finish that math page!" is loving.

 

There are good things like going to the bathroom uniterrupted - if you have younger ones (prek-1st gr. age), and not yelling "finish that math page". I have even finished some projects in 1-3 days instead of 1-3 weeks or still in progress..after many months or years. That was sort of cool.

 

I am hoping this spring to be spending some time outside in my yard as that has been somewhat neglected due to a higher priority - I was teaching my children at home.

 

And I suppose that next year may be different when my DH is home (We are thinking that school cannot be a bad place associated with dad gone and need to let them stay in one more year to see that tradtional system school is not bad - just different. They are at a good school with integrated curriculum. The kids have very mixed feelings about coming home) maybe I will buy some bonbons and sit on the couch and watch a movie once a week. We shall see what God has in store!

Edited January 13, 2009 by Grubbsfamily
long

[Peela]

My kids are away for a few days, and it's summer holidays, so I am luxuriating in that SAHM feeling. Except I am working part time, so it's not complete, but I still get plenty of time to...umm, what do I do? I dont do much I dont do anyway- play on the computer, read books, have spas with dh, go for walks, have afternoon naps- however, I feel a lot less rushed! I did get around to phoning a girlfriend today who phoned me last week to go for a walk and a chat- we will go in a couple of days. I didnt want to rush it :)

My kids are teens and tend to be gone from home more than before, so I am getting a taste of "life after kids". Dh and I find ourselves having conversations about "what we would like to do when the kids have gone, if they ever go, which we dont want them to, but what if....". Things like long drives, which the kids hate but we love. We would eat out more probably.

But all in all....I dont feel the kids deprive me of much that is important to me, and I fit in all the important stuff (like afternoon naps :)).

[Rhonda in TX]

My house was NOT clean all the time. I did NOT have dinner ready every night. I did go to Bible Study Fellowship (which I loved). I did NOT have lunch with my friends (they were all either back at work or too busy).

 

I did spend a lot of time up at the school (mainly because of DS's Asperger's issues). I did have homework battles every. single. night. (homework battles were much worse than homeschooling schoolwork battles because we were all tired)

 

I really have not felt like I am missing out on that much by homeschooling. Plus, I would have been back at work by this point, so I still wouldn't be home. (now a job, that does sound good to me at times :001_smile:)

[ereks mom]

I think that if I had that much time, I'd be pulling my hair out in boredom. I rather like teaching my own kids and the chaos of having kids home 24/7.

 

:iagree:

[coralloyd]

Most of my friend that have all their dc in school have gone back to, at least, part time work. I couldn't stand going back to work :tongue_smilie:. I'd still stay home.This would give me more time to read, keeping my mind fresh. However, with hsing I don't have to worry about this. My mind is always going, and I love learning with my kids.

There is one thing these sahms do that I would really HATE - the run out the door to drop of and pick up the dc thing. Especailly that morning drop off, or even just rushing them out the door to catch a bus. We are not morning people at all :001_smile:.

[JFSinIL]

I had the start of the last school year when all where in school (I ended up bringing youngest dd back home in January) and I did my free weights, walked the dog...and totally cleaned up our basement, which had not been done since we moved here about 14 years ago. Hubby is a pack-rat (not me - I am an archivist ;)) so you can well imagine the MESS. I NEEDED three months to get it all done!!!!

 

My neighbor two doors down is a SAHM...but she is at school 3 hours a day doing PTA stuff, being a recess/lunch monitor, subbing,etc.

[RoughCollie]

The only SAHM I know works out and/or runs every day and spends huge amounts of time volunteering with the PTA. Of course, she cooks, cleans, runs errands, takes care of her kids, and so forth. Her book club meets once a month, and she meets some other SAHMs for breakfast at a restaurant on Thursday mornings.

 

Her life is balanced among her kids, her husband, her house, our town, her friends, her extended family, and herself. She is the happiest person I know.

[Remudamom]

Well, I'm practically a non schooling SAHM because mine need about two hours of my time school wise and that's it.

 

House is cleaner, I cook more, horses get more attention. Reading more.

 

You're not missing anything.

[ElizabethB]

You have not mentioned having the ladies over for lunch or better yet meeting up for lunch with dh. I would love to help in the school library, classroom, or tutoring reading in schools that need the help the most. Have lunch with the kiddo's. Join a running club or learn to play tennis. Attend a really good bible study maybe even precepts since I'd have the time to put into it.

 

You can tutor reading!

 

I tutor with a group of ladies from our church, one of them watches the children who aren't in the class. (All but 1 of the volunteers has other children, 2 of the volunteers have children in the tutoring class.)

 

You can do one-on-one tutoring at your home or theirs with your kids in tow.

 

Here's how:

 

http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=76393

 

When I just had my daughter, we visited nursing homes, that's another good volunteer opportunity with children. The little old ladies loved seeing my daughter. It also gave me an opportunity to wear her fancy dresses more often, they just loved seeing them.

 

With 2 children and the youngest a boy, we now just visit older neighbor ladies or ladies in our church. When my son was a baby, there was a lady at my Bible study who was caring for her 90 year old mom with Alzheimers. She loved babies, she loved it when we'd come and visit. Her mom enjoyed watching my daughter run around. I gave her a box of toys for when we visited, it was like new toys after she hadn't seen them for a while and a good way to get rid of a few of them. With neighbors, we have special toys that are put up unless we are visiting.

 

Most of my SAHM friends are busier than me, they do way too many sports and are always fighting the homework battle.

[jld]

I think I'd die of loneliness if I didn't homeschool. I just don't feel right without the kids around. I know we all go through times when we'd like a little more quiet or less fighting or whatever, and I appreciate a few hours off like everybody else, but I think it would be really sad not to be with the kids most of the time. I don't know what I'll do when my daughter is in college. Call her everyday and tell her how much I miss her, I guess.:)

[Starr]

I remember early mornings getting her ready and to school on time. Hunting and gathering, working in the school library, going on field trips, participating in school activities and hanging out at the playground for an hour so the kids could unwind. Then came the time of day when all should have a siesta and we had to gear up for homework, sports, dinner, showers and bed. Exhausting! It did put an outside structure to our lives that I feel I could use at times.