DIY or hire it out? Re: homeschooling, running a household, work for pay, etc.

[Colleen in NS]

If you are a homeschooling family, that has both parents working for pay (whether at home or outside the home), how do you organize yourselves? How do you decide what life/homeschool tasks to keep doing yourself, and what to hire out?

 

I've been a SAHM for 11 years now, and had a 2 year stint when I tutored other kids in my home. During these 11 years, I've been the household organizer, grocery shopper, meal cooker, laundry doer, frugal researcher/implementer, homeschool organizer, bill payer/bookkeeper, bread maker.

 

It has been almost 3 years since I quit tutoring, and at least once a month I ask myself, "Should I start tutoring again?" because I can make a good chunk of money for us, even with just 8 hours a week (2 hours a day 4 days a week is how I did it before). I've been able to stretch our one income by living VERY frugally, and could continue to do so, but the older our kids get, the more I think about things like: saving up to get a 2nd vehicle so we can get OUT in the afternoons sometimes (no public transport in our area, and dh has vehicle afternoons and evenings - we've tried schooling afternoons/evenings so we could go out in the mornings, and it does NOT work for us), being able to afford piano/swim lessons, being able to afford things like a microscope or other sciency items/kits, and a few other things that would enhance their education. Saving up for fun high school things like Teaching Company videos or activities pertaining to their studies. Saving up some for university. Taking some classes of my own (or for dh). Being able to rent a cabin for a vacation, instead of tenting.

 

So anyway, I'm thinking of taking up tutoring again, 2 hr/day, 4 days/week (BTW, it's not a matter of dh changing jobs for more pay - he's sticking with his job for the time being). But the thing I have a hard time wrapping my head around is how to organize all that needs to be done. I'm an organized person, so I don't mean, how do I schedule everything in. What I mean is, how do you decide what to give up doing, what to train your kids to do, how to talk to your dh about re-organizing household duties, what to hire out? For example, cleaning. We all know the benefits of learning to do cleaning chores, teaching these to our kids. But I gave up charge of that awhile ago, and dh took over supervising weekly cleaning with the kids, as long as I organized it. But should I finally hire out cleaning, and reshuffle some other of my duties to the rest of the family? Will my kids miss out by not learning the fine points of toilet scrubbing??? I know that's a stupid question, but we are so used to the frugal DIY mentality!! But do you ever come to a point where you give up some of that DIY, pay to have it done, and then work for pay to cover that and other things you WANT to do? I am just so used to having to do everything life maintenance related ourselves. I've learned a lot of great frugal skills to be able to stretch the income and homeschool my kids, but I keep thinking I want to earn some more money to provide more breathing space, while not compromising our homeschooling, while somehow getting the household tasks done.

 

Are there people out there who manage to have both parents working for pay, yet aren't going crazy from cramming all of life's tasks in by yourselves, yet the necessities are getting done? And you are content? And you are providing what you think is an excellent education for your kids still? If so, tell me about your life, your mentality about it all, how you changed your mentality if needed.

 

BTW, I know it's Christmas season, and maybe you don't have time to fully answer this thread, but if you'd subscribe to the thread and answer me when you have time, I'd love it! I'll keep it subscribed for the next few weeks.

 

Thanks!

 

ETA: Every time I am puzzling over something, it doesn't always come out clear on here, sorry! I used cleaning as one example. But I'm also puzzling about the other constant activities like cooking, bookkeeping, prepping homeschool stuff, laundry, and necessary baking. I can't get rid of any of these things, but I can't hire out most of these things, either (so maybe I really am just wanting to hire out cleaning in order to reshuffle the other things?? Can anyone read my mind more than I can? Anyone want to analyze me, LOL?)

Edited December 23, 2008 by Colleen in NS

[Dayle in Guatemala]

Hi Colleen!!!!

 

When my dh and I were both working, it was a little bit of work, but, we came up with a good routine.

 

Everyday, as a family, we worked on one room. Really getting it clean. Dh would supervise while he was home and I supervised if I was home. We all pitched in. I made up a work list for each room of what needed to be done and assigned according to the dc's ability to help out. For example, I didn't want ds handling chemicals for cleaning, so he dusted, organized, swept, helped vacuum, run to put things away, etc.

 

On Saturday mornings, we would each take an hour in our bedrooms and get them picked up and cleaned.

 

This actually worked really well for us. It only took about an hour or so a day. We also did a 10 minute pick up every night before bed. We would go around the house and pick up things that aren't where they should be and put them where they belonged.

 

It really wasn't that much work and now my dc are great at cleaning and organizing things--well, everywhere but their bedrooms!:glare:

[tinag]

I know what you mean- hate to spend the money when you can DIY. You need to figure what is most important to you. We just hired the cleaning people back and even though I didn't want to because I can think of better ways to spend the money it frees me up for other things I want to get done. I want to have more time planning and cooking healthier dinners and want more time to hang out with my kids.

If it were me, I would rather tutor and pay for a cleaning service. It seems less stressful to me to tutor than to clean house. :)

[Joanne]

I can tell you what we've done. This has been since adding in my 3rd job. 2 are outside the home, one is our homeschooling situation includes additional (paid for) students. One job is a split shift and the other includes 2 late nights and Saturdays.

 

We negotiated with the kids a written chore for allowance situation. I won't pay for putting away clothes, cleaning up after yourself, making beds, etc. But we did negotiate wiping appliances, toilets, sinks, loading/unloading dishwasher, doing floors. We dropped the $35 every 2 week lawnmower to include that in the 13 year old's paid chores. They get paid an allowance if they did their work *and* kept up their "you live here" stuff.

 

I outsource my oldest's math class (and that of my oldest outside student).

 

The biggest thing I did was engage a maid service for a "one time" service. That has moved into having them every other week for $75. Yes, it costs 2 days' of my YMCA job. But it's worth it to know that the bathrooms will be cleaned well once every 2 weeks, sheets changed, floors done well (enough), appliances cleaned, house well vacuumed, everything dusted, etc.

 

For us, continuing to do that (or not do that) ourselves added stress that drains me. Other people might make other choices with meals (ordering from Schwans, for example, or other meal service).

 

One thing I observed and learned from having a daycare is WOH/Incoming producing moms *have* to make choices that enhance family time and life and minimize stress.

[Colleen in NS]

Just bumping up for today, in case anyone else can add to the helpful advice. I'll post some replies in a few days.

[Pretty in Pink]

How long would your house stay clean if you had it cleaned bi-weekly or weekly? I would rather spend a little bit of money getting my home and cleaning supplies organized.

 

For example, I have 3 cleaning caddies in my house: one in each restroom and one in the kitchen. It makes cleaning those rooms much easier since I don't have to spend time going back and forth to the kitchen to grab supplies. I keep those sanitizing wipes in each bathroom so that in the evenings I can grab one and wipe things down quickly. Then on Saturday when I really clean the bathroom it only takes a few minutes.

 

I also cut down on laundry by limiting the number of outfits each of my children has. They each have 5 pairs of pants, 10 shirts, one pack of undies and one pack of socks. Two pairs of shoes, sandals and sneakers.

 

I clean the kids' rooms on Saturdays. All I do is dust and vacuum. They are responsible for picking up their own floors and putting away items.

 

I sweep, my children mop on Saturdays. They use a swiffer with wet dishcloths attached.

 

I guess what I've gone the long way around saying is that I would clean rather than pay somebody else to do it. I don't mind spending a few hours each Saturday and I expect the children to help.

 

We do our own lawn work, clean our own vehicles, cook our own food. We pay for music and art lessons. We pay for vehicle maintenance. Our curriculum is more expensive but is laid out well so it only takes me an hour on Sunday evenings to plan our week. We spend a bit more on groceries than we used to but I am able to cook delicious meals at home that truly rival restaurant food so we don't miss eating out much. I also keep certain convenience foods stocked like frozen pizza, bagged salads, granola bars and cold breakfast cereal. It is expensive because we buy organic, but it is less costly than eating out.

 

If you are frugal in the areas we pay more for then that would cover a housekeeper.

[swellmomma]

I do it all myself, even when working for money. I work out of necessity which means there isn't enough money in the budget to hire a cleaner, etc. I do what I can, I rarely sleep, and the house is not as clean as I would like, but in the end it all gets done one way or another. The only area I get help is the yard work, my neighbor boys often shovel the snow or mow the lawn to help me out(our yards are attached).

[dm379]

I have 2 jobs from home plus I go to school. We don't hire anybody to do anything. DH does the majority of the housework, otherwise it wouldn't work. Saturdays is a big cleaning day, almost everything gets done then. Plus that's the day I plan everything. Lesson plans are made and my work, school and cleaning schedules/lists are made. The most important things come first and as the week goes on the chores are less important. It also helps that I let the kids sleep late and I get tons of work done before they even wake up.

[BamaTanya]

 

I've been the household organizer, grocery shopper, meal cooker, laundry doer, frugal researcher/implementer, homeschool organizer, bill payer/bookkeeper, bread maker.

 

 

 

Colleen, which of those tasks can you trust someone else to do? Can someone else do the grocery shopping? (Not in my house. I've tried.) Do you trust someone else with your nutrition? I personally don't mind prepared foods, but some wouldn't care for those. Can someone do your laundry?

 

Think about what is important to you for you to do, i.e., homeschooling. Then think of what it would cost for someone else to take care of something that you might not be as particular about. For me, it was cleaning. I don't mind if someone else scrubs my bathtubs or washes the sheets/towels. And, for a while at least, I was happy to have someone else educate my ds with Aspergers. These things can change!

 

Only you can determine what your comfort level with delegating tasks. And the availability of trusted help varies widely. If tutoring enables you to do some of the things you'd like to do while paying someone else to take up the slack, I think you should do it.

 

Good luck!

[lmrich]

I am able to tutor in the home - other homeschoolers. It works great! My kids (12, 9, 7) have to be patient as I am helping others, too. I was even able to continue working after ankle surgery (if I worked outside the house, I would have missed two months). I have hired a cleaning lady (again because of the surgery) and we will keep her. The kids have daily chores and weekly chores as well. I would certainly inquire on a local homeschool site about you accepting students. Good Luck and Merry Christmas!

[LisaKinVA]

Working a job PLUS homeschooling, PLUS housecleaning PLUS mealplanning... It's all about finding a balance that works "good enough."

 

There is no way the house is going to be "as clean" as if I didn't work from home. I'm not paying a house cleaner right now (although we may look that direction in March or so). We have to gain control of our budget first, and really make a bit more headway on paying off bills. So, good enough will have do do.

 

Our only bathroom gets cleaned weekly. The children and i do it together. I usually wind up only cleaning the mirror and the three oldest draw for their three favorite jobs (toilet, scum buster bath tub/sinks and swiffer mop floor). Pick up time happens before dinner -- toys put away and things cleaned up. If we get out of the habit of picking up every day, it makes for a long weekend of cleaning up (which I detest).

 

We dust/vacuum weekly (usually Sat or Sun). We don't have much to do there. We undertake larger cleaning projects on Sat or Sun as a family (I'm only dealing with 900 sq. ft. on a regular basis -- so our biggest issue is clutter. With 6 people in this small space, things get "cluttered" very quickly).

 

School wise, I do pay more for curriculum -- using K12 for the older two, and a mixture of Abeka and K12 for the younger one. I needed something that was pretty much done for me -- because I needed to reduce planning/organizational time to make more room for working, etc. Is it exactly what I'd do if I had all the time and money? No. But, it is a really good curriculum and it's working very well for everyone right now.

 

Cooking? Here is where I struggle most. And, it's not because I don't like to cook -- I DO. But, sharing a kitchen (which is upstairs), and having a 2yo toddler who needs to remain downstairs in order to get any cooking done has proven a true challenge. So, pretty much I need things that can be prepared in 30 min. or so and maybe simmer/bake/crock-pot for the rest of the time. I do go to a place like Dishing Up Dinner about once every three months -- so we can have some easier to prepare meals on hand. I've also made a goal for the New Year to make at least 1 freezer meal a week (make 2, freeze one for later). I find quick recipes (Impossible Pies using Bisquick, oven baked chicken (a shake & bake type) with Stove Top and canned green beans, Crock Pot, etc.) My husband also got me the Rachel Ray 30 minute meals cookbook, which I'm going through now to make some menus to try. Breakfast... cereal, oatmeal, and frozen waffles have been a staple around here. I'm going to try to be a bit more pro-active in this area as well (Taste of Home No-Fuss Freezer Meals, homemade french toast sticks, etc.)

 

The most difficult part is accepting that you really can't do everything the way you would do it, IF you weren't working. And, figuring out where the "good enough" line is can be challenging.

 

The whole family really has to be involved in as many aspects of running the household as possible. Husband too. If your husband isn't supportive (and I don't mean, GREAT you've got a job -- that's wonderful -- I mean, helping out with more things around the house, giving you a morning to sleep in or dissappear for a nap), it will wear on you tremendously.

 

And, you need a routine (not necessarilly a strict schedule, but a routine). Organization is truly your friend. Lists, planning ahead, will reduce your daily stress and help you get through each day.

 

So, in a nutshell -- find your balance, figure out what's "good enough" and understand that you may need to change a few things like buy bread instead of make it, or make it the task of an older child to dump ingredients into the breadmaker in the morning, so you'll have fresh bread for lunch... and again at lunch so you'll have fresh bread for dinner. And, if the 5yo cleans the toilet and leaves a few stains -- not to fret about it. The only one drinking out of the toilet is usually the dog :D

[LBC]

Are there people out there who manage to have both parents working for pay, yet aren't going crazy from cramming all of life's tasks in by yourselves, yet the necessities are getting done? And you are content? And you are providing what you think is an excellent education for your kids still? If so, tell me about your life, your mentality about it all, how you changed your mentality if needed.

 

 

 

Hi Colleen,

 

I'm not sure if I qualify for the things you mentioned in the quote above - especially the "aren't going crazy from cramming all of life's tasks in by yourselves, yet the necessities are getting done" part. I think that my reasons for not getting it all done are more about hitting a point of overload than about being organized and having enough time. I know I have enough time, because I've been wasting plenty of it reading and posting on the WTM boards lately.:D My personality doesn't always allow me to keep plowing through everything. Sometimes I hit a wall, and I just withdraw from my world. If you have the type of personality that can keep going, no matter how many hats you're wearing, then it might work for you. There are adjustments in my expectations on myself that I've had to make in order for it all to work. One example of this is that I've realized that I really need to take a week off of our school schedule every 6 weeks so that I can flake out for a week, and catch up on cleaning and work related projects.

 

Also, as a Canadian, you may want to look into how the extra income will impact your overall financial picture. Because you are working from home, you can probably write off a portion of your home expenses, which will help to off-set your taxable income, but it has been my experience that as soon as you begin to earn more money, you not only bump up into a higher tax bracket, but you also lose a substantial chunk of your Child Tax Benefit. Over the years, I have found that using Quick Tax to prepare our income tax has enabled me to insert some different numbers into the program to see how our overall picture will be impacted. If you pm me, I'd be happy to give you my email to answer questions about Canadian tax implications. I would hate to see you put extra time and energy into tutoring, only to find out that it didn't allow you the extra income to get a second vehicle, or hire someone to clean your house.

 

Along the same lines, I have decided against having someone else come in to clean for a few different reasons. One reason is, if I hire someone to come in, I have to pay them with money I've already paid income tax on, and around here it's about $20/hr to hire someone to clean. That's a lot of money when you consider how much you need to earn to have $20 after taxes. The other reason I have chosen not to hire someone is that I really don't want my dc to get used to having someone come in to do the cleaning. There's no way they will be able to afford a luxury like that when they move out on their own. We live in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, and for them to live here when they are grown will have enough challenges without them having expectations of domestic help. Not only that, but they are learning how to clean, and how to help out around here, and that's worth a lot IMHO.

 

Well, I could go on, but I really want to rally the kids and get the house clean today. :001_smile:

 

Lori

 

PS - I should mention that the work I do is from home, and it doesn't necessarily need to be done at a specific time of day, so I have more flexibility than you would have. I manage the office for dh's electrical contracting company, so I have deadlines for things like payroll, year end, tax remittances, etc., but that's not as difficult as always having something scheduled that needs to be done at a specific time every day.

[Arch at Home]

I work part-time for 25 - 30 hours. I find that for myself I have not so much had to hire out tasks but to prioritize, streamline, and organize. As many said I had to figure out how clean I needed my house to be. Could I get by with doing the floors once a week or did it need to be more often? Could I live with doing sheets every other week or do they need to be done weekly?

 

I have taken many streamlining tips from FlyLady.net. I make a menu and have a standard grocery list that I use. I have a weekly cleaning/home task checklist that I use to make sure that I get the important things done. I have and continue to declutter. The less we have the easier it is to clean.

 

I have found that in some places we spend more. I don't try as hard to economize as I would if I was not working. I don't go to thrift stores or garage sales. I target stores where I know I can get what I need at a reasonable price thoug it may not be the best price in town. I purchase bread and crackers though I could make it. We use predominantly workbook based curriculum. My children like them and they are easier to implement.

 

Best of luck.

[Sahamamama]

Colleen,

 

This might not help, but then again, it might. Years ago a friend of mine (who was working full-time) was lamenting the fact that her two children (around 14 and 11 at the time) were not learning how to do certain household chores, because she had hired a cleaning lady to come in weekly. She was worried that her children were not learning a "work ethic."

 

Now, I knew this family fairly well, and the children were NOT lazy -- nor the parents! -- so I gently said to Kate, "But your children ARE learning a work ethic, they are just learning how professional couples do life and get it all done. They are seeing you and Peter work heavy, responsible jobs. They know that you are one woman, with a lot of responsibilities, and the person who comes to clean once each week takes some of those chores off your plate. Just be sure that your children know how to clean for when they move to their own homes, and it'll be fine. There's nothing lazy about delegating!"

 

Kate told me that hearing this little speech ;) freed her in her thinking.... she had thought that she and her own family ought to do it all, but then she realized that she was teaching her children a good work ethic, just not a do-it-all-yourself one! It's okay to pay someone to do a part of your labor so that you can take on some work that brings in the money you need. I do HTH. Wish I could offer more advice, but that's all I've got this morning.

 

Merry Christmas!

[Colleen in NS]

Everyday, as a family, we worked on one room. Really getting it clean. Dh would supervise while he was home and I supervised if I was home. We all pitched in. I made up a work list for each room of what needed to be done and assigned according to the dc's ability to help out. For example, I didn't want ds handling chemicals for cleaning, so he dusted, organized, swept, helped vacuum, run to put things away, etc.

 

On Saturday mornings, we would each take an hour in our bedrooms and get them picked up and cleaned.

 

This room-a-day concept could possibly work here....I've been thinking about it since you wrote this. I've had chores organized more by type of chore like dusting, vacuuming and getting them all done on Sat. a.m., including bedrooms. Dh and dc do all that while I do necessary baking and "big" cooking to get ahead.

 

How long would your house stay clean if you had it cleaned bi-weekly or weekly?

 

It wouldn't stay perfectly clean for long, it's true. But right now, even though dh and dc do the majority of the cleaning tasks while I do necessary baking on Sat. a.m., it's not as clean as I would like it to be, because they just don't notice the details I notice. I have lists of chores, I've trained the kids on how I want it done, and dh supervises and does some of it and teaches them how to do other things, but.......it boils down to it's not as clean as I would like, yet I don't know if it's worth it for me to take back over supervising and training, if I'm going to take up a couple of hours a day with tutoring. Maybe I should revamp my chore lists and get even more detailed, LOL! That would drive them crazy, yet they'd get used to it after awhile, I suppose.

[Colleen in NS]

I know what you mean- hate to spend the money when you can DIY.......I would rather tutor and pay for a cleaning service. It seems less stressful to me to tutor than to clean house. :)

 

Yes, yes, yes! Hate to spend the money when you can DIY, yet I'd rather tutor than clean if it boils down to choosing one or the other! If I can't make it work to my satisfaction any other way.

 

I am able to tutor in the home - other homeschoolers. It works great! My kids (12, 9, 7) have to be patient as I am helping others, too. I was even able to continue working after ankle surgery (if I worked outside the house, I would have missed two months). I have hired a cleaning lady (again because of the surgery) and we will keep her. The kids have daily chores and weekly chores as well. I would certainly inquire on a local homeschool site about you accepting students. Good Luck and Merry Christmas!

 

I've tutored before (and I'm a little chicken about advertising again - I always think, "Oh why would someone want to PAY for something I find so easy???"). My kids were 3 and 5 when I started, and I did it for 2 years before it got to be too much for me (managing homeschooling and all).

 

What does a typical day/week of homeschooling, household stuff, and tutor-for-pay look like in your house? My kids are in the same age range, so it would be helpful to me to see how it works.

 

What do you have your cleaning person do, and what do you have your kids do for chores? Maybe I could hire a cleaner to do deep cleaning once a month or something for the stuff that really bugs me (gunk in the corners of the bathroom, splatters on kitchen cupboards, cobwebs and endless dusting everywhere that never gets done.......)

[Colleen in NS]

I can tell you what we've done. This has been since adding in my 3rd job. 2 are outside the home, one is our homeschooling situation includes additional (paid for) students. One job is a split shift and the other includes 2 late nights and Saturdays.

 

Yes, I have seen your posts about your various jobs and life jugglings and have scrutinized them to get some idea of how I could make a home business work while getting homeschooling and life tasks done! I'm glad you responded to my post.

 

We negotiated with the kids a written chore for allowance situation. I won't pay for putting away clothes, cleaning up after yourself, making beds, etc. But we did negotiate wiping appliances, toilets, sinks, loading/unloading dishwasher, doing floors. We dropped the $35 every 2 week lawnmower to include that in the 13 year old's paid chores. They get paid an allowance if they did their work *and* kept up their "you live here" stuff.

 

Hmm.....this is an idea I've been thinking about, too, since reading it here the other day. We've never given allowances, preferring that our kids work for pay for things like raking leaves, shoveling snow, or any other non-regular jobs around the house and telling them that they'd be able to do that kind of stuff for other people for pay when they got older. However, I really like this idea - it could be a way to get stuff done that will make life more pleasant, and teach them how to do those things and give them some incentive by paying for a job well done, which is what I'd do if I hired a cleaner, yes? How do you decide which chores are included in the allowance and which ones are not?

 

The biggest thing I did was engage a maid service for a "one time" service. That has moved into having them every other week for $75. Yes, it costs 2 days' of my YMCA job. But it's worth it to know that the bathrooms will be cleaned well once every 2 weeks, sheets changed, floors done well (enough), appliances cleaned, house well vacuumed, everything dusted, etc.

 

For us, continuing to do that (or not do that) ourselves added stress that drains me. Other people might make other choices with meals (ordering from Schwans, for example, or other meal service).

 

One thing I observed and learned from having a daycare is WOH/Incoming producing moms *have* to make choices that enhance family time and life and minimize stress.

 

I've thought about having a one time, thorough maid service come just to get everything thoroughly clean, then I'd have something to work from for making up detailed chore lists again.

 

About your observations about income producing Moms having to make choices - do you find that many of them do hire out cleaning or other tasks? How do they or you get over the guilt of not being superwoman or superfamily, LOL??? I think I have it stuck in my head that cleaning is one of those things that we as a family SHOULD be able to manage ourselves (or lawnmowing, or repairs which we don't do well at and do have to hire out a lot, or anything else that we've learned to do to live within our means), even if both parents work for pay and homeschool. And I've let my cleaning standards drop a LOT over the years. But now it's bugging me again.

[Colleen in NS]

I do it all myself, even when working for money. I work out of necessity which means there isn't enough money in the budget to hire a cleaner, etc. I do what I can, I rarely sleep, and the house is not as clean as I would like, but in the end it all gets done one way or another. The only area I get help is the yard work, my neighbor boys often shovel the snow or mow the lawn to help me out(our yards are attached).

 

My Mom raised 5 kids (all born within 9 years of each other) by herself while teaching elem. school full time after the last baby was born. :grouphug:

 

I have 2 jobs from home plus I go to school. We don't hire anybody to do anything. DH does the majority of the housework, otherwise it wouldn't work. Saturdays is a big cleaning day, almost everything gets done then. Plus that's the day I plan everything. Lesson plans are made and my work, school and cleaning schedules/lists are made. The most important things come first and as the week goes on the chores are less important. It also helps that I let the kids sleep late and I get tons of work done before they even wake up.

 

Does your dh work for pay or go to school as well? What does a typical week look like for your family, besides the Sat. cleaning/planning?

[Colleen in NS]

Colleen, which of those tasks can you trust someone else to do? Can someone else do the grocery shopping? (Not in my house. I've tried.) Do you trust someone else with your nutrition? I personally don't mind prepared foods, but some wouldn't care for those. Can someone do your laundry?

 

This is what I keep asking myself. Anything food related, we need to do ourselves - grocery shopping, cooking, baking, and doing all or most from scratch. It's a combination of two reasons - our kids have anaphylactic food allergies, and food is the biggest area in which we've been able to stretch a small income over the years. We've made a lot of changes in grocery shopping because of these reasons, and it has worked out cheaper and healthier and safer, and, if we work it right, more efficient than years ago.

 

Laundry....never thought about it......but I don't think that would work because we have a septic system, and water use needs to be spread out through the week.

 

Think about what is important to you for you to do, i.e., homeschooling. Then think of what it would cost for someone else to take care of something that you might not be as particular about. For me, it was cleaning. I don't mind if someone else scrubs my bathtubs or washes the sheets/towels. And, for a while at least, I was happy to have someone else educate my ds with Aspergers. These things can change!

 

Only you can determine what your comfort level with delegating tasks. And the availability of trusted help varies widely. If tutoring enables you to do some of the things you'd like to do while paying someone else to take up the slack, I think you should do it.

 

Good luck!

 

I think it IS the cleaning that I'd be willing to let go, if anything. I probably could make bookkeeping easier for me by getting a decent computer program for it. Right now it's a simple spreadsheet I made up, but it regularly gets changed (as in, lost, deleted, poof, gone) each time our "ancient" computer crashes - SO frustrating. But all part of the frugal life we've lived in order to not go into debt. But it's all starting to get to me, which is why I keep considering work for pay and hiring out some things.

[Colleen in NS]

The whole family really has to be involved in as many aspects of running the household as possible. Husband too. If your husband isn't supportive (and I don't mean, GREAT you've got a job -- that's wonderful -- I mean, helping out with more things around the house, giving you a morning to sleep in or dissappear for a nap), it will wear on you tremendously.

 

I'm pretty organized, and I've also let a lot of things go over the years, esp. as my kids get older and I've had to figure out how to teach more things in homeschooling - that takes time for me, too. But it's one of my bigger priorities, to give them my idea of a good education.

 

"The whole family" being involved is key here. Dh is willing to be involved - it's all the negotiating and revamping I find hard.

[Colleen in NS]

I think that my reasons for not getting it all done are more about hitting a point of overload than about being organized and having enough time. I know I have enough time, because I've been wasting plenty of it reading and posting on the WTM boards lately.:D My personality doesn't always allow me to keep plowing through everything. Sometimes I hit a wall, and I just withdraw from my world. If you have the type of personality that can keep going, no matter how many hats you're wearing, then it might work for you. There are adjustments in my expectations on myself that I've had to make in order for it all to work. One example of this is that I've realized that I really need to take a week off of our school schedule every 6 weeks so that I can flake out for a week, and catch up on cleaning and work related projects.

 

This is me exactly!! I've got no problem organizing things or reconsidering different ways of organizing - it's just that I hit a point where I shut down and quit plowing through. And it seems to be getting more frequent!!!! I've gone from schooling Sept. to June, to schooling 6 weeks on/2 off, to the last few months of 3 on/1 off and I feel so guilty that I've done that! WHY???

 

Also, as a Canadian, you may want to look into how the extra income will impact your overall financial picture. Because you are working from home, you can probably write off a portion of your home expenses, which will help to off-set your taxable income, but it has been my experience that as soon as you begin to earn more money, you not only bump up into a higher tax bracket, but you also lose a substantial chunk of your Child Tax Benefit. Over the years, I have found that using Quick Tax to prepare our income tax has enabled me to insert some different numbers into the program to see how our overall picture will be impacted. If you pm me, I'd be happy to give you my email to answer questions about Canadian tax implications. I would hate to see you put extra time and energy into tutoring, only to find out that it didn't allow you the extra income to get a second vehicle, or hire someone to clean your house.

 

Dh is self employed - he teaches guitar in students' homes, so he studies all the tax stuff every year. He does everything he can to lower his tax each year and he has mentioned that if we go over a certain level of income, the take home income after tax and business expenses will actually decrease. I don't know how that all works, but if I pressed it, he would come up with some research and figures (I don't want to, I just don't WANT to do all that research and learning - I've learned enough for plenty of other areas for our family/business/homeschooling/household life over the years, LOL!). During the two years that I did tutor previously, our CTB did go down by about $50/month, so I know what you mean. Then again, I could make a lot more than $50 a month by tutoring, so if dh will just figure out what that threshhold is........but if you have any specific info. you think would be helpful to me, feel free to pm me.

 

Along the same lines, I have decided against having someone else come in to clean for a few different reasons. One reason is, if I hire someone to come in, I have to pay them with money I've already paid income tax on, and around here it's about $20/hr to hire someone to clean. That's a lot of money when you consider how much you need to earn to have $20 after taxes. The other reason I have chosen not to hire someone is that I really don't want my dc to get used to having someone come in to do the cleaning. There's no way they will be able to afford a luxury like that when they move out on their own. We live in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, and for them to live here when they are grown will have enough challenges without them having expectations of domestic help. Not only that, but they are learning how to clean, and how to help out around here, and that's worth a lot IMHO.

 

The wanting my kids to learn to take care of their living space is a big reason why I've been hesitant to hire cleaning people. But I hadn't really considered the pay-after-tax aspect of it.....hmmm.....

[Colleen in NS]

I make a menu and have a standard grocery list that I use.

 

I think I might standardize meals a little more. I've gone by the Complete Tightwad Gazette principle of cooking with what you've stocked on sale - but we stock mostly the same things all the time, so I think I could standardize more. Breakfast is already standard - oatmeal M-F, pancakes on Saturday, eggs on Sunday. I could do a looser standard for suppers so that there is flexibility for using our stocks, but like something eggish on Wed., rice and something on another night, noodles and something on another night, and bread and something on a bunch of other nights....I could do this....and make enough each night for leftovers lunches.

[Colleen in NS]

Colleen,

 

This might not help, but then again, it might. Years ago a friend of mine (who was working full-time) was lamenting the fact that her two children (around 14 and 11 at the time) were not learning how to do certain household chores, because she had hired a cleaning lady to come in weekly. She was worried that her children were not learning a "work ethic."

 

Now, I knew this family fairly well, and the children were NOT lazy -- nor the parents! -- so I gently said to Kate, "But your children ARE learning a work ethic, they are just learning how professional couples do life and get it all done. They are seeing you and Peter work heavy, responsible jobs. They know that you are one woman, with a lot of responsibilities, and the person who comes to clean once each week takes some of those chores off your plate. Just be sure that your children know how to clean for when they move to their own homes, and it'll be fine. There's nothing lazy about delegating!"

 

Kate told me that hearing this little speech ;) freed her in her thinking.... she had thought that she and her own family ought to do it all, but then she realized that she was teaching her children a good work ethic, just not a do-it-all-yourself one! It's okay to pay someone to do a part of your labor so that you can take on some work that brings in the money you need. I do HTH. Wish I could offer more advice, but that's all I've got this morning.

 

Merry Christmas!

 

Yes, this DOES really help!!!! I could apply this to all sorts of things like, do I weave my own cloth to make my own clothes? NO! Do I feel guilty about that? NO (but I do shop the $7/huge bag sales on clothing in thrift stores, and I do make the occasional piece of clothing from recycled fabric)! For us, that would go way too far and cut out being able to homeschool the way I want to! But how many times have I lamented the fact that neither dh nor I are handy with wood - I mean, SOMEONE has to make tables and chairs and couches that we use, why don't we learn?? Because it would take away the time for more important things to us. Oh, and let's not forget gardening - I have halfheartedly tried over the years to garden - I just plain don't like it. I used to, before I had kids. But wouldn't gardening save us money? Sure. I still haven't gotten over the guilt of that yet.

 

Yeah, your thoughts really helped. It's the same as my thinking about homeschooling - how many of us want to help our kids figure out their interests and what they are good at (while shoring up weaknesses that need to be shored up) and then help direct them into satisfying, yet productive and supporting lifework. I heard a respected college professor say one time that he does what he's good at and gets paid for it, and he pays others to do what he's not good at or doesn't have time for or doesn't consider a priority and that he thought that was a good system.

[Colleen in NS]

So, if you do hire out some of your household tasks so you can prioritize homeschooling and working for pay, how do you decide what to keep and what to hire out? How do you decide how much of the household work to give to your kids to do? How do you teach a good work ethic even if cleaning is hired out?

 

Thank you so much, all who replied! You've all been very helpful to my thinking.

[Colleen in NS]

bump

[Strawberry Queen]

Well, I haven't hired a cleaner, although it's very tempting:) I do pay for chores though. We started paying for chores when dd asked for money. We decided on paying for some chores so that she'd learn that she gets money from working. We pay for chores that are for the whole family. My dds currently get paid for doing all the laundry, mopping floors, shoveling snow. My oldest gets .30 per load of laundry, .50 mopping, .50 shoveling. They do all sorts of other chores like setting table, cleaning rooms, helping with supper etc.

It is a big relief to know that I just have to tell them to do the laundry and it gets done. Now, it's not always done perfectly but I'm satisfied and I don't really miss doing it myself. But, I'm nowhere near a perfectionist. In short I pay for anything that's my responsibility and that affects a family area. I have also told my dds that I will not pay for chores once they get old enough to have a flyer route. They will still have to do the same chores, they just won't get paid. I figure that the amount that I pay,probably about $4-8/month, will not be of much consequence compared to $$ earned doing flyers.

[Joanne]

Originally Posted by LBC View Post

Along the same lines, I have decided against having someone else come in to clean for a few different reasons. One reason is, if I hire someone to come in, I have to pay them with money I've already paid income tax on, and around here it's about $20/hr to hire someone to clean. That's a lot of money when you consider how much you need to earn to have $20 after taxes. The other reason I have chosen not to hire someone is that I really don't want my dc to get used to having someone come in to do the cleaning. There's no way they will be able to afford a luxury like that when they move out on their own. We live in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, and for them to live here when they are grown will have enough challenges without them having expectations of domestic help. Not only that, but they are learning how to clean, and how to help out around here, and that's worth a lot IMHO.

 

The money part I understand intellectually, and it makes "sense" on paper. However, there is a non-priceable element to having "help" and the freedom and encouragement you get when you don't have to "worry" about some housekeeping responsibilities. I'm a better mom, wife and *homemaker* having hired people.

 

I'm not feeling the "kid" part of the quoted post. There is plenty that goes on in my children's lives that won't happen in their early adult and early family years.

 

Having a cleaning service is not mutually exclusive to plenty of chores, responsibility and learning to clean and keep a home.

[lmrich]

Colleen,

I am very lucky to be able to tutor in my home. I work with two homeschool families that both own thier own businesses (so they have flexibilty). One family has two children and they attend a hybrid type school, where they get all of thier assignments. My job is to help them complete the assignments and I really just provide them a sanctuary and guidance. I have helped the older student with her essays alot (really alot!) and the third grader with multiplication. The other family has relied on me to set the curriclum with their input. They are a great family and the kid is on an Olympic training team! This family is bilingual and they have traveled extensively in the past. The kid is great and has been like a fourth child.

 

I was a curriculum director for a nice private school in the area and when I left (because I didn't agree with my principal's principles) and these families agreed with me (others did too - long story) and I am paid very well.

 

My school day begins at 8:30 with math for my first grader. We finish this and move to FLL then to spelling, and writing. My older two get their assignments from a hybrid school (I love that!) and they are very responsible and self motivated. My students arrive at 10:00 and they get started on math first; two use Teaching Textbooks and I supplement with "keys to..." series. The third grader needs a little guidance and I support him. Meanwhile my first grader has moved onto quiet reading/listening to a book on a tape or finishing a workbook page. (she is an amazing little student) Basically the rest of the day is a balance and juggling act to get everything done. Four of the six are studying the Ancients, so they can hear each others texts or projects and it overlaps. The kids enjoy eating lunch at my house and I have lunch trays for them. We have thirty minutes of outdoors time and they can ride bikes or play with our puppy. Most days we finish at 3:00. Sometimes I keep the 6th grader until she finishes her daily assignments; her mother has some health issues and is not always patient with her, so she would rather stay at my house.

 

I see no problem with starting a load of laundry when my students are over, if they are engaged and working. If I have to empty the dishwasher, I ask for help and always get it. When I was recovering from my surgery and in a wheelchair, I had a lot of help, they even copied their own pages for me on the copier in the office.

 

In some ways this keeps me more focused and organized, we can't take off the morning to go to the dentist or to the nature trail because I have to work (we do that in the summer and on the weekend). However, the parents were very understanding when my kids are sick or when I had to have a morning appointment for my ankle.

 

I am very blessed to have this situation and the money that I make pays for all of my kids extra activities and tuition at thier hybrid school. I have a cleaning lady every other week as well. I also think, because I have worked full time in the past, this is not a strecth for me. (I know another lady who tried this and didn't like it) You won't get rich doing this, but every bit helps, right?

 

Best of luck!

[Colleen in NS]

There is plenty that goes on in my children's lives that won't happen in their early adult and early family years.

 

Having a cleaning service is not mutually exclusive to plenty of chores, responsibility and learning to clean and keep a home.

 

Joanne, did you see my reply to your other post? I'd really love to hear your thoughts on it, if you have a chance. You're giving me some pretty good food for thought for hiring out some tasks!!:D I also wouldn't mind if you expanded on this quote, too.

 

Thank you!

[Colleen in NS]

We pay for chores that are for the whole family.

 

In short I pay for anything that's my responsibility and that affects a family area. I have also told my dds that I will not pay for chores once they get old enough to have a flyer route. They will still have to do the same chores, they just won't get paid. I figure that the amount that I pay,probably about $4-8/month, will not be of much consequence compared to $$ earned doing flyers.

 

This sounds similar to Joanne's paying an allowance for chores. I'm just wondering how it would go over here, if I were paying for chores when they are younger, then not paying, but still requiring, when they work for others for money.......I'll have to bounce this off of dh.

[Colleen in NS]

I have a cleaning lady every other week as well. I also think, because I have worked full time in the past, this is not a strecth for me. (I know another lady who tried this and didn't like it)

 

Ah, I see now, this is different from what I thought you were talking about. You have kids there for several hours a day, integrated into homeschooling. I'm talking about tutoring a kid, separately from my kids, for an hour a day in language arts skills, for several days a week. And maybe taking another kid for another hour a day (making it 2 hours a day, tutoring 2 different kids). And doing this 4 days a week, so 8 hours per week. It would be intensive tutoring, and I did this before for two years. Since it's intensive, I would not be able to work with my own kids during that time, nor do housework. It would be dedicated working hours, as if I were not home. Since they are separate hours, this is why I'm wondering how to juggle everything else. I keep telling myself that two hours isn't much, but it is when figured in with everything else! LOL And I've worked full time outside the home before, but it was pre-kids, so I've never hired out cleaning, so I guess I'm looking for "permission" here along with really good reasons I can convince myself with :lol:.

 

Thank you for detailing what you do!

[lmrich]

Colleen,

I would think the only way to tutor one on one would be in the evening. I have done that in the past as well. I tutored after school when I taught full time and my kids just played and did homework in the classroom next door to mine. I have also tutored in my home at night. I charged $40 per session. I would gladly do that again; it is very rewarding.

 

Good luck!

[Colleen in NS]

Colleen,

I would think the only way to tutor one on one would be in the evening. I have done that in the past as well. I tutored after school when I taught full time and my kids just played and did homework in the classroom next door to mine. I have also tutored in my home at night. I charged $40 per session. I would gladly do that again; it is very rewarding.

 

Good luck!

 

This is EXACTLY what I'm thinking of - evenings 7-9 p.m.. It's the time that least interferes with homeschooling/family life, and I'm hoping to find students that can come at that time.

[plansrme]

I haven't read through all of the other replies, so this is probably redundant, but perhaps there's something that will be helpful. My husband and I both work outside the home. I work part-time. We have a "governess" teaching the kids when I'm not there. Yes, this is pricey, but it works very well for us. Two of my 3 kids (youngest is just 5, thank goodness) also have very full extra-curricular and social lives, so I'm always running someone to swim or dance or the gym (seriously--I spend many, many hours in the car every week). Here are my most important organizational and time management strategies:

 

1. Keep in mind that producing an income, or keeping yourself employable, is part of nurturing your family. It does not take away from the grand sum of all you do for them. It's different from cooking or doing laundry, but it's still FOR THEM. I cringe when I hear of SAHMs letting their teaching certificates lapse or their nursing certifications go, as I feel very strongly that moms need to be able to provide for their families in the event that their husbands die or become disabled or flake out.

 

2. More practically, I do laundry 2 days a week--no more, no less. This gives me some economies of scale. Every laundry day, I do the bedding from a different bed so we all eventually have clean sheets.

 

3. I have a cleaning service every other week.

 

4. I plan for leftovers to cut down on cooking time. At least once a week, I plan a meal that I can double and freeze for use the next week. I feel very smug every time I pull one of these meals out of the freezer.

 

5. I plan and shop for 2 weeks of meals at a time and post the menu on the fridge so my husband can get dinner started or finished while I'm running children to and fro. Shopping for 2 weeks at a time also frees up every other Saturday morning.

 

6. I do not watch TV unless I'm also doing something else.

 

7. I keep vacuum cleaners on each floor of my home so it's easy to grab one and quickly vacuum the floor that needs it.

 

Hope that helps,

Terri

[Colleen in NS]

perhaps there's something that will be helpful.

 

1. Keep in mind that producing an income, or keeping yourself employable, is part of nurturing your family. It does not take away from the grand sum of all you do for them. It's different from cooking or doing laundry, but it's still FOR THEM. I cringe when I hear of SAHMs letting their teaching certificates lapse or their nursing certifications go, as I feel very strongly that moms need to be able to provide for their families in the event that their husbands die or become disabled or flake out.

 

Actually, this is the part that is most helpful to me - thanks for saying that!