ThisIsTheDay Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 I'm a guest next month at a wedding that begins at 2pm, cocktails at 5pm, reception at 6pm. It is a church wedding and a country club for cocktails, dinner/ dancing. Can I wear the same dress? What do you think most guests might do? My sister suggested she may wear two different dresses, but I'm coming from out of town and prefer to not change. We'll have downtime between wedding and cocktails, but as the location is about 1/2 hour from our hotel, we're planning to stay close to the reception location (probably in another bar, haha). I'm super excited about going, but the time delay is new for me and I am not quite sure what to expect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 I don't know that that sounds like there is a lot of downtime between the wedding and the cocktails. The wedding would take about an hour, and there might be travel time between it and the cocktail location. If the church wedding is a Catholic mass, it will include the Eucharist and maybe even take longer than an hour. I have been to only one event that had a big time gap like that--it was a bar mitzvah and although I did not change my clothes, I changed wraps. This is because I had a sleeveless dress on, and I wore a chiffony stole with it to the shul (because bare upper arms could be considered disrespectful by some attendees, despite this being the Reformed denomination) and a short coat (warmer for the evening cool down) that I took off inside to the reception, which went very late. If there is more of a dress code for the church than for a typical formal party, then I would suggest considering changing either wraps or your dress, but I don't think that it is necessary to do so if you don't want to. I don't think it's all that common. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 If the wedding is in a church, then more modest dress is usually appropriate. Unless you already know the level of modesty expected, I would reach out the couple and ask. If it is very modest, then the reception may be less restricted, so many may want to change outfits just to be more comfortable. If you want to wear a more modest dress all day, then I say one outfit is appropriate. I would not go the other way, and wear a less modest dress to the wedding in a church. If the outfit is not quite modest enough to wear to the wedding, adding a sweater, shawl, or other top layer may be enough, and then you can ditch it at the reception. I would not expect all the guest to have 2 outfits. Modified with various layers, yes, but not two distinct outfits. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 I went to a wedding once (in another country) where they had probably a couple hours downtime between the ceremony and the reception. That was new to me too! I was wondering if it was more the tradition of that country. Some people did change into nice casual clothes (out of their dressier clothes) for the reception part, but it sounds like your reception part is pretty fancy. Maybe at least bring comfortable shoes to wear in-between? The time in-between went fast though. You drag out the dawdling and visiting with people at the end of the ceremony, and dawdle a little in the parking lot of the reception area ahead of time. 🙂 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 This is the norm with most of the weddings I have been to. I've only changed between them once ... because the day was warmer than I had expected and I wanted to be more comfortable at the reception. After the ceremony, there may be a receiving line at the church (or something more informal where people gather to talk to the newlyweds or family. Sometimes, the couple may choose to go to an alternate location for pictures. By the time the church cleared out, there was usually only about 90 minutes between leaving the church and heading over to the reception site. I've been to some weddings where they had a hospitality suite at a local bar or hotel for guests between the wedding and reception when there was a longer gap. My parents opened up their house for out of town family and guests for some light refreshments since it was close to the church. I appreciated the gap because my introvert self needed a break from people. We did have a limo (a prize I won at some show) and we just drove around for a bit. Others just go to a bar, even if it is to have some non-alcoholic beverages. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThisIsTheDay Posted March 16, 2019 Author Share Posted March 16, 2019 Thank you so much for your kind and helpful responses. You've given me a few things to consider and lessened my uncertainty. It's not a Catholic wedding but sounds like it will be pretty traditional. My husband is going with me, and we're staying in a fancy $$$ hotel downtown (something we never have done!). We'll have several aunts and cousins to hang out with. I haven't visited in about 5 yrs. No one is getting any younger, so this will be especially sweet. And I want to look fantastic! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeachyDoodle Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 Even if you don't want to change outfits, you could think about different jewelry/accessories to switch out between the ceremony and reception. Something simple for day and more flashy for evening. It sounds like fun, and I hope you have a great time catching up with your family! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Marmalade Posted March 16, 2019 Share Posted March 16, 2019 The time gap is totally normal here in Wisconsin. Traditionally it came about as a way for farmers to attend weddings. They could go to the ceremony, and then go tend to chores before going to the dinner and reception. In the meantime the bridal party zips around town in a limo visiting favorite bars/hangouts/etc. Sometimes an extended family member will offer a pre-reception gathering for out of town guests who might have nowhere to go for that time. No one changes in between things though. Except for the farmers who changed in and out of their barn clothes. 🙂 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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