Would like to adopt a new cat

[Night Elf]

We have Toby who is almost 2 years old, I think. He likes to be with people but he's been spending a lot of time alone lately. He usually spends the bulk of his time with my ds at night when dh and I go to bed. However, ds doesn't want Toby in his room anymore because he jumps on the computer desk and stretches out and gets in the way. Ds tries to put him down but the cat keeps jumping up and eventually he'll bite ds when ds tries to get him down. So now the cat is locked out of the room.

We think a second cat could be a good companion. We're thinking a female cat would be the best choice as two males might not be companionable. What do you think?

We still have our dachshund who chases the cat but we have a baby gate up that the cat can jump over so he has control of the situation. I hate to bring another cat into a stressful situation like that but if the new cat can deal with it like my male cat does, there should be no problem.

What do you think?

[Pawz4me]

IME with cats what's most important is matching their personalities and activity level. Two playful, outgoing cats are going to be much happier together than one playful outgoing cat and one lazy scardey cat. That's true of altered cats. I certainly wouldn't put two male cats together if one/both were unaltered.

Opposite sexes is more of an issue with dogs than with cats.

But there are always exceptions. The above are generalities.

Edited November 22, 2018 by Pawz4me

[Night Elf]

2 hours ago, Pawz4me said:

IME with cats what's most important is matching their personalities and activity level. Two playful, outgoing cats are going to be much happier together than one playful outgoing cat and one lazy scardey cat. That's true of altered cats. I certainly wouldn't put two male cats together if one/both were unaltered.

Opposite sexes is more of an issue with dogs than with cats.

But there are always exceptions. The above are generalities.

Toby likes to play. I hear him playing with his toys in the other room. He chases his toy mouse up and down the hallway. He also likes to lay on his cat tree and look into the back yard. 

In the morning, Toby sits on one side of the counter while my dachshund eats breakfast. Then my dachshund walks way around him to avoid him on his way to go outside. That's the only time the two of them are in the room together without chasing happening. 

I thought he was 24 months in December but dh says he's 20 months.

We would get an animal from our no-kill Humane Society so he/she would already be fixed. I don't want a baby kitten. I'd like a cat at least a year old. Do I need to bring in a younger cat or can it be older? We've only ever gotten one kitten and he scratched our furniture. All the other animals we've adopted have been over a year old and didn't scratch anything except the cat tree rope.

[Matryoshka]

Cats are so individual.

We had an older cat that didn't like other cats.  He'd chase them and be aggressive.  We had one we had to rehome because all she'd do is hide under the bed.  Then we took in a stray pregnant cat; he tried that on her and she went all mama bear and wanted to kill him.  We rehomed her but kept two of the kittens.  That ended up working out well - he ended up really bonding with one of the kittens (the male) - they'd sleep together even - although he still got a bit aggressive with the female. But he left her alone enough that it wasn't a problem.  They just didn't hang out together.

Then the male kitten passed on when he was only 8 (cancer).  We got two more siblings (m/f, right about a year old).  They got on fine with the old cat (go figure), but the female they harassed.  We separated her.  The old cat died of old age, but both the young ones kept harassing the female even though we had them separated (they'd sneak in and get into fights).  After many years, we ended up rehoming them.

We still have the female, who's getting on in years.  We just got a new cat (also adopted at about a year old).  He's a much better match.  She doesn't like him, but he doesn't harass her.  We still have her separated for her mental health (she's just a cranky old lady at this point) - sometimes he'll sneak in, but he won't be aggressive.  In fact, he'll make submissive 'let's play' noises.  He sometimes does chase her, but it's only because she ran and he thinks she wants to play.  She does not want to play; she wants to sleep. It's such a shame her brother died young; they loved each other. My dd has a cat at school that she brings home on breaks and he and the new cat get on fine (both neutered males).  Dd's cat I don't think even knows old lady cat exists, lol.  He stays on his side of the house.

So, pretty much agreeing with the pp that it's the cats' individual personalities, matching agressive/submissive and activity levels as well as possible.  And old cats just tend to want other cats to get off their lawn, lol.  Sometimes really persnickety old cats can do better with young kittens - they don't seem a threat so small and then they're used to them by the time they grow up.

And we have a dog (our Toby!) - the cats all like to tell them they're boss.  He's bottom of the totem pole, lol.

ETA: somehow I missed that your Toby was so young.  He'll probably be much easier to match a new cat to.  If he likes to play, another playful youngish cat will probably be good.  And honestly, I've had better luck with neutered males getting along than females.  Neutered male cats are more chill (generally - individuals can vary greatly!)

Edited November 22, 2018 by Matryoshka

[rdj2027]

After our old cat passed away, we adopted a two year old male from the humane society.  The second cat, also a two year old male, we adopted from a rescue because they knew his personality.  It is working out pretty well, they have their moments but overall they get along fine.  Our previous cat never tolerated any other cat and was fiercely protective of her territory.

[Dmmetler]

DD brought home a kitten in September, and he almost immediately started really annoying our two older cats (5 and about 4-they appeared on our back porch as a young mom and her still nursing kitten a few years ago). The local shelter let us take him in (with a clean vet check, shots, etc) to one of their visiting rooms, and see how he interacted with some of their kittens. We ended up bringing home one about a month younger and half his size, who had been terrorizing the older cats in his foster home (he was an abandoned/orphaned kitten). The two have gotten along extremely well as both wrestling buddies and cuddle buddies ever since-and our two older cats are much happier.

 

Maybe you could take Toby visiting and see if there’s a good personality match, possibly even in a cat who has been fostered with dogs and is used to them, so would be readily able to handle the dachshund. I know shelters here love it when they can place adult cats, since often they’re harder to find homes for. 

[Ausmumof3]

Can you find a rescue that’s looking for people to foster cats?  Then if you get one that works out really well you can adopt.

[Night Elf]

I'd prefer adopting from the no-kill shelter my thrift store where I work supports. We've gotten many animals from there and they've all been fantastic. They don't have a single room to see if two cats would work together. They have 2 cat rooms and 1 kitten room. In order to see if a dog is affected by a cat, they take the dog into the cat room on a leash and ask him to sit. If the dog pulls on the leash, I suppose they say he isn't used to cats. It's not fool proof though. When I got my dachshund, I was told he was used to cats in his foster home but he started chasing our cats his very first night here. Within a 6-month period, we lost our two cats to natural causes and were left with our two dogs. We went 7 years without a cat in the house. Then in 2016 one of our dogs died and we got Toby the cat in 2017. That's our pet history. 🙂

I was wanting another dog but dh really wanted a cat so I was overruled. We got the cat but I feel bad that he is chased by our dog so the two can't really be loose together. We have a baby gate up that separates them. Now we're thinking about another cat to be a companion to Toby as he spends so much time alone. I realize all animals have individual personalities. I'm just trying to find a starting point where I can start looking. In other words, would a cat who came to us at 8 months and is now 20 months old who seems sociable except with the dog, do better with  kitten or another cat his own age?

[Terabith]

I have often wondered how the cat society in my house would have been different if, when we found Obama, if we had gotten him a friend to play with rather than leaving him to try to pester the elderly cats.  

It's hard to say, but I'm GUESSING he would do better with another cat his own age and temperament, but I'd really like to see if there was a way to test them for fit.  20 months is still a pretty young adult cat.