another wedding guest attire question

[marbel]

Next week (!) I'm going to a wedding.  I'm a family member but not a member of the wedding party (aunt of the bride).

 

I just found out that the dress I bought (after much difficulty finding something I liked, that fit OK, and that was within the budget) is the same color as the bridesmaids' dresses. My other niece (maid of honor) says it would be fine for me to wear the same color, being that I'm a family member. But I think it would look stupid.  I mean, no one is going to think I'm trying to look like a bridesmaid, but still.  

 

On the other hand, how is a guest supposed to know what the wedding colors are, and thus what colors to avoid?  I asked about colors today because I realized the invitations were accented in a dark teal which made me wonder about the dresses.

 

Funny, I don't even like the dress, but I haven't time to find anything else really. I have a print dress that I could wear, but I fear it is not up to the "dress code" of "cocktail/semi-formal" as stated on the wedding website.

 

(I am happy to receive attire guidelines for invitations but the use of the term "dress CODE" seems off. But whatever.)

 

Anyway, what about the color?

 

 

Edited May 2, 2017 by marbel

[Suzanne in ABQ]

I would wear the dress.  As an extended family member, you won't be hanging out with the bridesmaids.  You might be in a photograph, but that will be with other family members, not the bridesmaids.  You will just enhance the decor.

[whitestavern]

Honestly, I think it's fine. I'm sure at any given wedding there are guests wearing the same color dress as the bridesmaids. I wouldn't worry about it!

[Carol in Cal.]

I always avoid black or white or fabrics that 'read' black, white, or drab for weddings.\

I want to look festive, and often wear florals, because I have yet to see anyone in a wedding party with floral 'uniform' dresses, and they are easy to find and attractive.

 

I would probably wear your floral print if it's a dressy one, or wear heavy accessories with the wedding party colored dress if that seemed to be the only suitable one.  There are lots of sophisticated, big scarves available that could change the whole look of a solid dress.

[zoobie]

Wear the dress!

[Guest]

I would wear it. It's no big deal. I wouldn't do it on purpose, but it surely could happen in any wedding.

[kroe1]

Wear it! There is no rule about matching the color of bridesmaid dresses.

[HTRMom]

I've only heard not to wear white, black, or extremely bold colors like bright red, because they dominate photos. You aren't supposed to predict what the bridesmaids will wear.

 

 

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[Loowit]

I think it would be fine to wear it, but if you will end up feeling awkward all night it might be best not to just for your own comfort.

 

I find the invitation often gives a clue as to the wedding colors, but I would guess that isn't always the case.

 

I avoid black and white for weddings, but otherwise I am not sure there is really a way to always prevent wearing the same colors as the bridesmaids.

[Bluegoat]

There is no way a guest could know this.  I don't really get why it would be an issue, I've never heard of it being something to avoid.

[Crimson Wife]

I would find out from the bride how the bridesmaids will accessorize and go for a completely different look. So if the bridesmaids are wearing silver shoes, wear black or nude. Add a "statement" necklace and you're good.

[marbel]

Thanks you guys. I'm on my phone so can't like your posts. Gah I thought by my age I would be over this kind of thing. My daughter and I are shopping for her now. She's much easier. :-)

 

Part of my problem lies with my relationship with my sister (MoB) which can be fraught and I don't want to mess up.

 

Thanks for talking me down!