SquirrellyMama Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 I am sick again :( My dh is angry at my inability to stay healthy for any length of time this winter. I haven't been sick in 6 years. He asked me when I was going to the doctor to find out why I keep getting sick. The last time I went to the doctor, which was at Christmas, I asked this question. Their answer was that it was happening in many families this year. Would you go back and ask again? I think it's just a bad year for me. I'm pretty sure I'm more stressed this year, so I'm more susceptible. My dh has a horrible bedside manner so I'm certainly not getting sick to have him around more. I need spring! I had mono in high school. You can't get that more than once can you? Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 :grouphug: He's angry that you are sick? Seriously? *Angry?* :glare: I hope you feel better soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PuddleJumper1 Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 I had mono in high school. You can't get that more than once can you? Unfortunately, according to the infectious disease doctor that treated my ds last spring, you can :( So sorry you are having such a hard time. My dd seems to be following the same path. She just can't seem to get and stay well these past few months. Hope you are feeling better soon :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted January 29, 2015 Author Share Posted January 29, 2015 :grouphug: He's angry that you are sick? Seriously? I*Angry?* :glare: I hope you feel better soon. He's never dealt well with illness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 Yes, I have had it several times, as chronic mono. It activates when I am physically run-down. If you are running a fever, coughing up thick mucous, having trouble breathing, have difficulty swallowing or have a muffled sounding voice, severe headache and/or neck stiffness, ear pain, or acute vomiting, then you should go to the doctor as these are some of the signs of active infection/illness that need medical attention. However, if you are just tired, with sniffles or a sore thoat, then you might consider waiting it out. Some illnesses like flu, whooping cough, mono, etc...reallt can take their toll, and the illness and recovery period can take several months. If you want to describe your symptoms, there are several knowledgeable people who will give their opinion as to whether you might consider going to the doc again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 ...and tell your DH that getting mad won't help you get better any quicker and in fact could slow down your healing. Do you want the hive to have a "talk" with him about his attitude and lack of caring support? :mad: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 He's never dealt well with illness. I'm so sorry you're sick. My DH is lovely with everyone but me when they are sick or hurt. He panics and gets so worried when I get sick bc he sees me as the glue that holds everything together. I tell him the fastest way for me to get better is for him to be nice to me. It's easy...bc my love language is words of affirmation. He just has to say nice things! Easy peasy! I tell him, If he is sweet, it reduces my stress and I'll get better faster. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I'm so sorry. It's been a terrible winter. Terrible viruses that drag on and on here, too. I would go back to the doc. You might not get answers, but then again - you might. You will at least get guidance. You could have an infection, the mono could be active again (I hope not!) or any number of things. Strep is going around here, too. If infection, mono, etc is ruled out then there are things you can do to help your immune system, but you probably need that other stuff ruled out first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isabella Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I think I'd be speaking to Dh....for goodness sake, how would he be if you got something like cancer? Perish the thought, but anger certainly has no part to play in something you cannot help! And as other posters said, it could very well be contributing to your stress, therefore a lower immunity, and the constant sickness. My husband used to be the same with me, and then I did get cancer, so I know of what I speak! He and I were very close to separating after my treatment was over, because of the way he was during it. Since then I've grown a backbone and would not stand for it. But, on a more gentle note: :grouphug: I really, really hope you get better. I feel for you so much. I've been sick for a month now, and the thought of it going on much longer drives me to distraction. Read the other thread about long-lasting sickness (it's Tap's post no.27 http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/540429-dr-hive-what-am-i-missing-why-am-i-not-getting-better/?do=findComment&comment=6157973 ), a poster there mentioned all the things she was doing to proactively help her body to fight. I think she's on the right track. I mean to do the same (actually have started today), and make it my every day's work to help myself to get better and well again. Hugs again :grouphug: , and take good care of yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I am sick again :( My dh is angry at my inability to stay healthy for any length of time this winter. I haven't been sick in 6 years. He asked me when I was going to the doctor to find out why I keep getting sick. The last time I went to the doctor, which was at Christmas, I asked this question. Their answer was that it was happening in many families this year. Would you go back and ask again? I think it's just a bad year for me. I'm pretty sure I'm more stressed this year, so I'm more susceptible. My dh has a horrible bedside manner so I'm certainly not getting sick to have him around more. I need spring! I had mono in high school. You can't get that more than once can you? Kelly This is very true. We are just getting over our 2nd round of illness here. I can't imagine my DH getting angry at me for being sick. What is he angry about exactly? That actually makes ME angry for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 He's never dealt well with illness. Sorry, he needs a wake up call, at the very least. Anger is not an appropriate reaction to his wife being sick during winter months. It is not like he's going through intense grief over a terminal illness. Is it more worry / anxiety than anger? What is he angry about? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Girls' Mom Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I am sick again :( My dh is angry at my inability to stay healthy for any length of time this winter. I haven't been sick in 6 years. He asked me when I was going to the doctor to find out why I keep getting sick. The last time I went to the doctor, which was at Christmas, I asked this question. Their answer was that it was happening in many families this year. Would you go back and ask again? I think it's just a bad year for me. I'm pretty sure I'm more stressed this year, so I'm more susceptible. My dh has a horrible bedside manner so I'm certainly not getting sick to have him around more. I need spring! I had mono in high school. You can't get that more than once can you? Kelly It IS happening a lot this year. I hardly ever get sick, and when I do I'm usually over it in a few days. I have been sick literally all winter. It started with the flu and went downhill from there. I've been to the doc more in the past 2 months than I have in the past 2 years! I'm sorry your dh is being jerky about it. That isn't helpful at all. It isn't an excuse, but he is likely afraid. Is he a worrier by nature? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.... Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 We've been sick all winter, too. :glare: We've been buying orange juice and vitamins like crazy! I'm not a big hand sanitizer person, but we've been keeping it on the kitchen counter. Also, I've been making the kids go around the house wiping doorknobs and light switches with sanitizing wipes. That seemed to have helped. Some of my kids caught the flu and some of them didn't - all in the same house. Within two months, we've had the flu with The Exorcist movie-type vomiting (I was ready to live out in the back yard at that point), some kind of weird cold w/ a cough/sore throat and my husband had a motorcycle accident. Seriously? :nopity: That's enough!! :grouphug: I hope you feel better soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fruitofthewomb Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 My DH admitted that he was mad at me bc I had the flu. I knew it by the way he treated me but to hear him say it out loud was crazy. So I get it. It makes no sense but that doesn't matter. Just avoid him & ask a friend or family member for help. Hugs for you. It sucks to be sick & not have support. Oh & our family has been on a roll with illness too. It is just a bad year! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 When you are sick, his world is upsidedown, and he is angry that he can't "fix" it. He shouldn't take it out on you, but that is where the illness is. Tell him "I am angry at the flu, too! But help me recover so we can get back to normal!" or words to that effect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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