Excelsior! Academy Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Two different parents from two different events recently talked to me about things my children said that were not what they should have been saying. Neither child said something completely horrible just not the nicest nor the most appropriate setting to be saying what was said. My children have taken the appropriate measures by apologizing, etc. I am disappointed and expected better from said dc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flowing Brook Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Children are learning. While they are in your care they are in training mode. As Wendy said even perfect people make mistakes. All children goof up sometimes. They are learning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happyhomemaker Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 I think teaching your children how to correct a situation that they have handled poorly is just as important as teaching them the right thing to do. We will ALL do inappropriate things at times-even as adults. Dealing with the aftermath in a responsible manner is a valuable thing to learn and one that not all parents are willing to teach. Sounds like you are doing a good job to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Agreeing with the pp's--so important for your kiddos to understand they don't have to be perfect. Pls be careful about sharing how keen your disappointment is. Far from being an incentive to do better, it is often an incentive to keep things from parents. Be sure to let them know you may not be happy about what they did, but you still like and love them. It's hard for kids to see the difference between disappointment in their behavior and disappointment with deeper things that are part of their identity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Agreeing with the pp's--so important for your kiddos to understand they don't have to be perfect. Pls be careful about sharing how keen your disappointment is. Far from being an incentive to do better, it is often an incentive to keep things from parents. Be sure to let them know you may not be happy about what they did, but you still like and love them. It's hard for kids to see the difference between disappointment in their behavior and disappointment with deeper things that are part of their identity. It can also end up an incentive to stop trying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slipper Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 It's best to learn these lessons while they are young. Let kids make kid mistakes when the stakes are low. Additionally, you can't possibly be a bad parent or other parents wouldn't have come to you with these situations. They must know you care and would want to know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Two different parents from two different events recently talked to me about things my children said that were not what they should have been saying. Neither child said something completely horrible just not the nicest nor the most appropriate setting to be saying what was said. My children have taken the appropriate measures by apologizing, etc. I am disappointed and expected better from said dc. Kids are kids. Batten down the hatches and be prepared. Disappointment should be conveyed as a learning tool. You had them apologize...they did....make sure they know what they said was wrong and why.....then drop it. I am sure I disappoint my kids sometimes. We are all human beings, we make mistakes, do what we ought not do, get caught up on the wrong side of right....especially learners. No parent's parenting is perfect....who can think of every flipping scenario under the sun? No kid is perfect....that is how they learn. Expect better....all the time, but don't be too shocked when they do something shocking....it is all part of growing up. Kids are not little mini-mes or robots....they too need to work it all out in their own way and time. < hugs!>. That first time being called out about your kids by other parents Is mortifying. < hugs! > Sounds like you are a great mom.....keep on, keepin' on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 They are children. This is why kids need parents. I know it feels awful to hear these things, but at least you have been given the opportunity to help your kids grow through and beyond them. Hugs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassenach Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 I learned a long time ago that kids will always do something shocking. Something that will make you say, "My kid did what?!" And, yes, it can definitely feel defeating sometimes. However, just remember that we've all been there. The parents that came to you have been there, too. All kids are going to make wrong choices sometimes. But yeah, parenting is not for wimps! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted April 1, 2013 Author Share Posted April 1, 2013 Thank you all. Time and perspective plus the cyber hugs make things a bit better. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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